“Hey, kid.”
Cassie turned. “Good morning,” she said as she rose to her feet. “The coffee is fresh.”
“Thanks.”
He quickly glanced at her face, but couldn’t see anything lurking in her eyes. No shadows to indicate a restless night, no telltale love-bite marks on her neck.
Sasha held out her cup. “Mill,” she said.
He’d already figured out that “mill” really meant milk. “Is she offering me some of hers or asking for more?”
Cassie poured his coffee and grinned. “Why don’t you find out?”
He’d actually been hoping for a recap of last night, not a lesson in child rearing, but she’d been right when she told him he was going to have to figure out how to get along with his niece. Tentatively he moved close and took the offered cup. He shook it; it was empty.
“More milk,” he said and walked to the refrigerator.
When he handed Sasha back her cup, she beamed at him. Her slight “t” sound could have been an expression of pleasure or thanks. He found he didn’t really mind which. With Cassie around to protect him from making a hideous mistake, he sort of liked being with the kid.
“What can I get you to eat?” Cassie asked as she set his mug on the table. “We have cereal and fruit. There are frozen waffles, or I could make you eggs or even pancakes.”
Tentatively, prepared to spring up at any moment, he took the seat next to Sasha’s high chair. She gave him another grin, then dropped her spoon into her cereal and began eating again.
“You don’t have to feed me,” he said, not taking his gaze from his niece. She wasn’t exactly coordinated, he thought as a bit of cereal went flying, but she got the job done.
“I know it’s not technically one of my responsibilities,” Cassie told him, “but you have to eat something. Not only is breakfast the most important meal of the day, but Sasha is going to mimic just about everything you do. If you refuse food, she’s going to do the same.”
There was no fighting a woman when she’d made up her mind about something. He’d learned that lesson early and well. “Cereal,” he said. “With a banana. And after today I’ll get my own breakfast.”
“Whatever you’d like. You’re the boss.”
Her tone was sweet, but he didn’t buy it for a second. She was in charge here, and she knew it.
As Cassie prepared his cereal, Sasha finished hers. Every couple of bites she offered him the spoon. He finally figured out she wanted him to feed her. “Okay, I can do some of the work.”
He scooped out a small amount of the warm, rice cereal. Sasha opened her mouth, then looked at him as if to say “Aren’t I too clever for words?” He found himself smiling at her. If it had been this easy when he’d first been alone with her, he wouldn’t have panicked so much.
When she’d finished eating, she drank the last of the milk, then said, “Down.”
Ryan looked at Cassie. “She wants out.”
“If she’s finished eating, that’s fine.”
He glanced from her back to Sasha. That hadn’t been the answer he’d expected. He’d thought that Cassie would come over and take care of things. Okay, so she was giving him practice. He could handle this.
He crossed to the sink and fished a clean dishcloth out of the drawer, then dampened it and returned to the high chair. After removing the bib, he cleaned the toddler’s face, hands and arms, then unhooked the tray and put it on the table. Sasha held out her arms.
Ryan bent over and lifted her from the seat. But instead of leaning down toward the ground, she pressed a wet, cereal-scented kiss on his cheek. “Unk Ryan,” she explained.
“Yes, I know,” he said, somewhat at a loss as to his next move. Finally he set her on her feet. She giggled once, then scampered out of the room.
“You’ve won her over.” Cassie set his breakfast on the table. After picking up the dirty high chair tray, she carried it to the sink.
“I don’t think it was the clear victory of the campaign,” he admitted, “but it was a pleasant encounter.”
“If this is a campaign, then you must be the general in charge?” she asked.
“You have to ask?”
“Five-star?”
“If they come with that many, sure.”
She smiled at him as she returned to the table and took the seat opposite his. He glanced at his cereal, the neatly sliced banana and the plate of toast sitting together on the place mat.
“Thanks for doing this,” he said. “I meant what I said. I’ll take care of it from now on.”
“Whatever you’d like.”
He started his breakfast, all the while trying to ignore the unusual domesticity of the situation. He rarely had women over to his place because he wasn’t comfortable with them spending the night. Actually it wasn’t the nights he minded as much as the awkward mornings. So he did his thing and escaped as gracefully as he could. Besides, the women of his acquaintance had to be at work as early as he did, so there was no time for idle chitchat.
It occurred to him that Cassie was
already
at work and that for her, this was simply a part of her job. The thought unsettled him although he couldn’t quite say how.
Sasha ran into the room and handed him a red ball. He took it, but before he could say anything, she was gone again.
“Oh, we’re going to play that game again,” he said and patted his front pockets. “I don’t have any spare change.”
“There’s some over here,” Cassie said, rising to her feet. She crossed to the counter and pulled a white envelope out of a drawer. “It’s the remaining grocery money.” She fished out several pennies and two nickels. “This should keep her happy.” She placed the money next to him and took her seat.
Morning light spilled in through the big, lace-covered window. Cassie looked freshly scrubbed and well rested. Except for the heart-shaped earrings she usually wore and her promise ring, she didn’t have on any jewelry. Her clothes were as casual as his. Yet there was something about her…something sexy.
He cleared his throat. “So, how was your evening?”
Her gaze lowered. “Very nice. We went to a movie, then stopped and had dessert.”
“Were you out late?”
He was a fraud, he thought even as he asked the question. He knew exactly what time Cassie had gotten home. With a quick calculation of the time needed to drive to the theater, watch the movie, then order and eat dessert, unless they did it in less than fifteen minutes, it was unlikely Cassie and Joel had made love the previous night.
The realization pleased him and he refused to consider why.
“I think I got back about ten-thirty,” she said.
“Oh. I was reading in my room last night. I didn’t hear you.” The lie slipped easily off his tongue and he had a moment of guilt. Then Sasha returned with her favorite stuffed bunny and distracted him. He gave the girl a penny, which she took with a squeal of delight, then raced out of the room again.
“So you had fun?” he asked, not sure why he was pursuing this particular topic.
She hesitated. “Of course.”
“You must be very comfortable with Joel. Having dated him for so long. I mean that in a good way,” he added quickly when she glanced at him.
“We’re…” She hesitated. “Can we change the subject?”
“Of course. I didn’t mean to pry.”
“It’s not that. It’s just I have lot on my mind.”
What? he wanted to asked, but knew it wasn’t his business. Still, his mind raced. Was it Joel? Had they fought? Were they—Sasha came back, this time carrying a long, pink dress. Instead of offering it to him, she held it up in front of herself. “Kern,” she said, her expression serious. “Unk Ryan, me kern.”
He turned to Cassie. “This would be an excellent time for you to translate.”
“There’s a big assumption there,” she said. “I’m not sure what she’s asking. Sasha, what’s that you’re holding?”
Sasha came around to her side of the table and held out her dress. “Oh, it’s your dress for Halloween.” Cassie motioned to the garment. “Sasha is going to be a princess, aren’t you, honey?”
Sasha nodded vigorously. “Me kern.”
“Kern,” Cassie repeated thoughtfully.
“Isn’t a kern a kind of bird?”
“Maybe, but I doubt that’s what’s on her mind.” She leaned toward the toddler. “What’s a kern, sweetie? What do you want?”
Sasha huffed out a breath. “Kern,” she repeated and patted her head. “Pincess kern.”
Ryan searched his memory for something like a kern, then got it. “She means crown. She wants a crown so she can wear it with her princess dress.”
Sasha rushed to him and chattered on about kerns and pincesses and Lord knew what else. Ryan felt as if he’d just aced an IQ test. He stroked the girl’s hair, then touched her cheek. “We’ll get you a crown. The prettiest crown ever.” He glanced over at Cassie. “Do they sell them?”
“No problem. I’ll take her by the party-supply store on our way back from preschool. She can pick out her own. They’re made out of cardboard, so they’re easy for the kids to wear.”
“When is Halloween?” he asked. He hadn’t thought of that particular holiday in years. His condo was a secure building, so they didn’t get any foot traffic, and it wasn’t the kind of place that welcomed children.
“Monday. I haven’t bought any candy. I’ll do that when I do the grocery shopping.”
Ryan reached into his back pocket and pulled out his wallet. He passed over one of his credit cards. “Use this for anything you need. Expenses for the house, whatever. Does she need clothes?”
“Not right now. She doesn’t seem to be in a growth spurt, so we’re fine. However, kids her age can shoot up, almost overnight, so I’ll let you know if anything gets small or tight.”
She nodded at Sasha who had left her dress draped over Ryan’s lap and was quietly playing on the floor, between her uncle’s feet. “You’re doing well with her.”
“Thanks.” He fingered the soft cotton of the princess dress. “You were right last night. I
do
need to spend more time with her. I appreciate you caring enough to say something.”
“Just doing my job.”
“It was more than that. I’ll admit to being a little nervous about the whole thing, but I’m determined to give it my best shot.”
“She can’t ask for more than that.” Cassie paused. “It would be great if you took Sasha out trick-or-treating on Halloween.”
“Sure, if you’ll come with us.”
“No problem. I can ask my sister to hand out candy here while we’re gone. She and her husband are going to a party, but that’s not until later in the evening. Sasha won’t want to go to more than a dozen or so houses. When she gets tired, we can come back here, then she can give out candy.”
“Sounds like a plan.”
Cassie glanced at the clock above the stove. “Sasha, time to go to school. Let’s put your toys away really fast, then we can leave, okay?”
The toddler scrambled to her feet, then bent over and grabbed her bunny. Ryan handed her the dress. While Cassie took care of his niece, he took his dishes to the sink.
He listened to the sounds of them getting ready. He’d grown accustomed to the chatter of voices and the thumping footsteps. Maybe this wasn’t going to be so terrible, he thought. Maybe John hadn’t made as huge a mistake as Ryan had first thought.
It was Cassie’s influence, he realized. She was very special. Honest and giving, an old-fashioned sort of woman.
She stuck her head into the kitchen. “We’re outta here. See you later.” She hesitated. “You have the most peculiar look on your face. Is something wrong?”
“Not at all.” He couldn’t tell her what he’d been thinking. She wouldn’t understand and he didn’t want to do anything that would make her uncomfortable. “I was thinking that Joel is a very lucky man.”
Her smile faded slightly and her eyes took on a haunted quality. But before he could ask, her expression returned to normal. “Thanks. I’ll be sure to tell him the next time I see him.”
CHAPTER SIX
C
ASSIE
GREETED
HER
sister at the front door. Chloe handed her a large paper shopping bag, reached down and grabbed two more from the porch, then stepped into the Lawford house.
“I don’t know why I thought this was going to be a great idea,” Chloe said and laughed. “It didn’t seem like such a big deal to show up at the party in costume. I conveniently ignored that step in the middle, the part where I actually had to put it all together.” She bent forward, her round belly making her awkward, and gave her sister a kiss on the cheek. “I really, really appreciate you offering to help me with this.”
“My pleasure.” Cassie closed the door behind her and led the way to the kitchen. “I thought we could work in here. Sasha is down for her nap. Apparently they played outside at preschool, so she’s exhausted from all the running and jumping. I figure she’ll have about an hour and fifteen minutes of honest sleep, then maybe she’ll spend another thirty minutes quietly playing in her bed.”
Cassie set the shopping bag on a chair and began emptying the contents. “To try and stack the odds in our favor, I went to her room a couple of minutes ago and put her favorite doll in with her.”
“Clever,” Chloe said as she, too, dumped yards of green, yellow and white fabric onto the table. “I like that in a woman. Now if only you can be equally creative with this mess.”
She dug around until she found several of the larger pieces that she’d already sewn together. “Where’s Ryan? I don’t want to expose my pregnant self to him. I think the poor man is probably traumatized enough in his life.”
“Don’t give me that,” Cassie told her sister. “You look amazing. The problem wouldn’t be Ryan, who would be instantly smitten, it would be your husband’s insane jealousy.”
Chloe tossed her head, causing her ponytail to dance. “Arizona’s not insanely jealous. He just keeps a close eye on me when we’re out.”
“That’s because he knows you’re the most beautiful woman in the world and he desperately wants you.”
Chloe’s smile was content. “I don’t know about thinking I’m that beautiful, but he does like to keep me around.”
“An intelligent man.”
“Obviously.”
The two sisters laughed. “Do you want something to drink?” Cassie asked. “I have milk and juice.”
“Milk would be great.” Chloe rubbed her belly. “I’m trying to get all my calcium naturally, which means at least two glasses of milk a day, sometimes more. So while the baby is growing, leaving less and less room for my bladder, I’m drinking more and more. I swear, there are some days I just want to set up my laptop by the bathroom to save myself the time of walking back and forth.” She took the glass Cassie offered. “It’s only going to get worse before it gets better, too.”
“But it will be worth it.”
“I know.”
Cassie looked at her sister, noting the glow to her skin and the light in her eyes. Chloe had always been the tall, slender, pretty one, but now she was radiant. Arizona’s love filled her with a joy she’d never known before. Pregnancy agreed with her, she was working hard on a book about her husband’s travels, and she’d never been healthier or happier.
“I’m glad for you,” Cassie said, meaning it with all her heart. She believed there were enough good things out in the universe for everyone. The fact that Chloe had found what she wanted in life meant that it was possible for Cassie, too.
“So Ryan’s working?” Chloe asked.
“Yes, and unlikely to surface anytime soon. You’re safe.”
“Good.” Chloe unbuttoned the oversize shirt she’d worn that afternoon. Underneath she had on leggings and a sports bra. “I can’t get any part of this costume to work,” she said as she slipped into the long green sleeves. “If you could just help me pin it together, maybe baste it in a few key spots, I can sew it when I get home.”
Cassie stepped back and appraised her sister’s attire. The invitation to the university’s Halloween party stated that attendees were to dress like famous couples in literature. Chloe’s advancing pregnancy had prevented her from wearing anything formfitting. She’d toyed with the idea of Romeo and Juliet, but she’d decided that was too obvious. Not to mention the fact that Arizona had refused to wear tights.
“I think you two are going to be the hit of the party,” Cassie said as she found the layered front of the costume. Chloe had sewn yellow on the lower part of the belly, with white up by the throat. “The crocodile and Captain Hook are perfect.”
“Like I said, I thought it was brilliant until I realized I didn’t know how to sew a crocodile costume. I want the puffy-out belly part to skim over my stomach. At least then the pregnancy won’t be obvious, but I’m not sure it’s going to work.”
Cassie stepped close and held up the midsection. “It’s not sticking out enough,” she said. “And the pocket for your tummy has to be lower. Let me rip out the center seam and insert about six more inches of the yellow cloth. Then we’ll use ribbing to give it a little more shape on the side.”
“Is that what’s wrong?” Chloe asked, then shook her head. “I should have asked for you to help me from the beginning. You always were better than me at this domestic stuff. I’ve been tearing up pieces for a week and getting nowhere.”
“We have different talents,” Cassie said as she started separating the layers of fabric.
Growing up, she and her sister had sometimes sewn dresses, but usually Chloe didn’t have the patience. She’d always been going and doing. Cassie was the one who liked to stay home and take care of things there. They were so different, Cassie thought. Probably because they had different biological parents. Being raised in the same home could only do so much.
As she worked, Chloe talked about her life. Cassie listened and tried to ignore the faint whisper of envy that drifted through her. She was glad for Chloe and her happiness, and she reminded herself there was still plenty of time for her own dreams to come true.
“Arizona is completely crazed about the plans for next summer,” Chloe was saying. “He’s received invitations from all over the world. Everyone wants him to come speak. The baby will be six months old, so I told him my requirements were for a relatively short flight, decent facilities and no luggage restriction.” She rolled her eyes. “Do you have any idea how much stuff babies require? The more I read about that, the more it amazes me.”
“So you’ll be staying in the country?”
“Maybe. I don’t know.” She spread her arms so Cassie could pin on the modified front panel. “Two universities in England have made fabulous offers, so he’s talking about lecturing for a few days in New York or Washington so we get adjusted to the change in time and the plane ride isn’t too awful. Then we would take the Concorde to England and spend the summer there.”
“Sounds like fun.”
“I hope so.” She looked sheepish. “He’s already talking about a second baby, timing it and everything so that we’re always free to travel in the summer. He’s very concerned that I don’t get overwhelmed with all of it and—”
Chloe pressed her lips together. “I’m sorry. You don’t want to hear about all this.”
Cassie stopped pinning and stared at her sister. “Why not? I
want
you to tell me about your plans. Just because you’re married doesn’t mean we’ve stopped being friends.”
“I know. It’s just I feel as if I’ve gotten everything and you don’t have…as much.”
Cassie knew the pause had been because Chloe had started to say “anything.”
“I appreciate your concern about my feelings,” she said. “But I do have a lot. Maybe it doesn’t seem like it to you, but you and I have never wanted the same things. You’re a great reporter and a terrific writer. You’ve always wanted to travel and you’ve married a wonderful man who adores you and wants to show you the world. Everything is working out. That makes me happy. But my path is different.”
“I know.” Chloe touched her arm. “I’m not being critical. In the past we’ve argued about your career choice, but I finally understand.” She rested her hand on her stomach. “When the baby kicks, I can feel the life growing inside of me. Until that happened I didn’t know why you would want to ‘waste’ your life with children. Now I see it’s the most amazing thing you can do with your time. I respect that and I admire you for realizing it before you had a child of your own.”
Cassie was a little embarrassed by the praise. “Wow, you make me sound like a saint or something. I’m not.”
“Hey, I know that—I’m your sister, remember. But you’re a good person who pays attention to what is right. I just wish…”
Her voice trailed off. She fingered the front of her costume. “I think this is going to work, don’t you?”
As subject changes went, it wasn’t a very smooth one. Cassie knew what her sister had been about to say. “You just wish I would break up with Joel.”
Chloe drew in a deep breath. Her mouth twisted down on one side. “You’ve tried to explain it to me a dozen times and I still don’t understand what you see in him. Yes, he’s very nice and he’s honest and hardworking, but Cass, you could do so much better. You’re bright and funny, you care.” Her tone softened. “I want you to find a man who understands that you’re an amazing prize and that he’s lucky as hell to have you. Not some guy who thinks of you as little more than a housekeeper and broodmare.”
“You’re not being fair to Joel,” Cassie said, but her reply was automatic. She was too conflicted about her feelings to try and explain them to her sister.
“Does he make you laugh?” Chloe asked. “Does he make your heart beat faster just by walking in the room? Does he have a certain way of looking or smiling or have a phrase that makes you realize that if you never heard it again or saw it that you would just die?” She caught her sister’s gaze. “Do you think about spending the rest of your life with him and know, deep down in your heart, that if something happened to him, you would be happier being alone rather than trying to find someone else?”
Cassie dropped the pins onto the table and sank into a chair. “I don’t know,” she said quietly. “I just don’t know anymore. I wish I could tell you yes to all of those questions, but I can’t.”
Chloe took the chair next to her and placed a hand on her shoulder. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you.”
“I’m not upset, I’m confused. I used to be sure. I thought that Joel was exactly right for me, but something’s different. I don’t know if it’s him or me or circumstances.” She looked at her sister. She had to know. Of all the people in the world, she knew that Chloe would tell her the truth.
“Is passion real?” she asked. “Is it like in books and movies? Can it really sweep you away until you can’t imagine anything else ever being so wonderful?”
Chloe stared at her for a long time. Finally she nodded. “It’s exactly like that.”
Cassie hadn’t realized she was holding her breath until she released it. “I was afraid of that.” Her shoulders slumped forward. If passion was real, then she and Joel were doing something very wrong. Maybe they weren’t right for each other or meant to be together. As much as she wanted to believe otherwise, she doubted it was suddenly going to flare between them. So she had to decide if she could live her life without experiencing that kind of fire, or if she had to leave the security of the only man she’d ever dated.
“You have to be sure,” Chloe told her. “It’s been nine years, so it’s not going to hurt if you wait a little longer until you get engaged to Joel, but please promise me you won’t settle. If you think it over and believe in your heart that Joel is the man who is going to make you happy for the rest of your life, then I swear I’ll be the sweetest sister-in-law ever. But don’t make a mistake. Marriage is tough enough, even with love.”
Cassie looked at her sister, at the affection and concern on Chloe’s face. “I appreciate the kind words and the fact that you worry about me. You’re the best sister ever.”
“I know,” Chloe said and laughed. She stood up and put her hands on her hips. “Enough of this emotional nonsense. Let’s get this costume finished.”
“Absolutely.” Cassie picked up the pins and went back to work.
“How’s Ryan doing with Sasha?” Chloe asked as she raised her arms so Cassie could pin the front panel to the sleeves.
“Better. Obviously it’s going to take time, but our talk went really well. He seems to intuitively understand how Sasha needs him. They’re spending more time together. He joins us for breakfast, he’s reading to her before she goes to bed. Considering their shaky start, I’m impressed. Ryan’s a quick study and the situation is helped by the fact that he’s bright and has a great sense of humor. All important factors for good parenting. Plus, he’s kind. He makes me feel like part of the family.”
Cassie finished pinning and stepped back. The top and bottom of the costume were unfinished, but there was definitely a crocodile-like shape to the strips of yellow and white down the front. “Maybe a clock,” she said, half to herself as she eyed her sister. “Hadn’t the crocodile in
Peter Pan
swallowed a clock? We could make the face of a clock out of fabric and sew it on in front. Or maybe you could find a pocket watch somewhere. There’s always…” Her voice trailed off as she realized her sister was staring at her.
“What?” Cassie asked. “You’ve got this weird look on your face.”
Chloe broke out into a smile. “Cassandra Bradley Wright, you have a thing for your boss! Why didn’t you tell me?”
Cassie desperately wanted to deny her sister’s claim, but she could already feel the heat crawling up her face. She ducked her head. “I do not.” The statement sounded lame, even to her.
“You do. I can’t believe I didn’t get this before. Is there anything going on?” Her teasing tone grew serious. “He’s not taking advantage of you or the situation, is he? Geez, Aunt Charity and I should have checked the guy out before letting you come stay here. Has he—”
Cassie raised her hand to cut off her sister. “Stop right there. Don’t get all worked up about nothing. I swear Ryan isn’t taking advantage of me.” Not that she would mind if he did, a little voice whispered in her head. Cassie tried to ignore it and the faint warmth that swept over her at the thought.