Dream With Me (With Me Book 4) (21 page)

A question in those two syllables.

“I’m good,” I say. Better than good.

And then we start to move. I lift up and go down on him, feeling his thrust upward. YES. I flatten my hands harder on his chest as we find our pace. That decadent slow, steady pace, the slight swivel of hips, the hard muscles of his thighs underneath me.

He leans up, closer, his mouth closing around my nipple. Pulling deep.

I move harder. Faster. And then . . .

He moves forward. My legs fold around his waist, holding onto him. I tug on his hair, get him to lift his head enough so our mouths meet.

He presses me back against the carpeted floor and buries his head against my neck. No slowness. No steadiness. His control? Totally gone.

He thrusts in me, hard and hot. Deep. Wild. Untamed. The passion unleashed. Harder. Hotter. Deeper. I clench around him, milking him. His breath saws in and out, his mouth latches onto the side of my neck, sucking me. Marking me.

My back arches off the floor as he reaches even deeper in me, touches me in every part of my soul. And I don’t break out of the cocoon. I burst free in an explosion of bright colors. His name is a shout of release from my mouth.

He moves harder in me. And I know he’s close when he pulls free of me. His cock, slick and wet from me, and pulsing in his grip. He squeezes, his features tensing.

“Come on me,” I say.

His cock jerks in his hand, and he slits his eyes open. “Yeah?”

“Mark me,” I say.

He aims toward my flat stomach and in the next breath comes on me. It’s hot and sticky, and we both stare at the creamy thickness on my skin. His hands go to my stomach, rubbing it in me, and that’s so freaking hot and dirty that it makes me want to make love with him right that second.

He notices my look. “Again?”

“Again,” I say.

“Let me clean this off you first,” he says and reaches for his shirt. “Actually you need something wet.”

“I’m already wet.”

He makes a sound.

“And achy.”

“Let me see.” His hands are already reaching for my legs. “Spread for me.”

I do so, feeling emboldened by the heat in his eyes and the way he lovingly strokes the delicate insides of my upper thighs.

“You are so wet again. So responsive.”

“You came on me, and I got—”

“Like this?” He growls his approval. “I’ll make the ache go away. I’ll make you feel so good.”

“Yes,” I breathe out.

He touches me, his thumb circling my clit. Lightly.

“Griff.”

“Need more?”

I arch my hips in response.

A little harder. A flick. His fingers dip down to tease my entrance. “You feel so tight. You think you can take me again?”

“Yes. Yes. YES.”

“Take me, then,” he says as he covers me with his body and enters me in one swift thrust. “Take me.”

It’s fast and hard, both of us straining toward another release. I let go first, and he pulls out of me once more, this time aiming at my breasts.

We both can’t speak, much less catch our breaths afterward. Griff looks over at me. I can’t help but smile, knowing it’s a wide, goofy grin of love.

Griff pauses for a long moment. “Let me check to see if the bathroom is clear.”

He doesn’t wait for my response but quickly dresses and heads out.

I’m left alone to wonder what happens next for us.

‡

Griff returns shortly. “Everyone is
hanging downstairs, and I can keep people from using the upstairs bathroom if you want to use it.”

“I definitely do, and I can take a quick shower,” I say. “Do you have something I can borrow?”

“Yeah. Of course.” Griff goes over to one of his drawers and pulls out a T-shirt and shorts. The T-shirt alone will be more than enough to cover me on the short walk to the bathroom.

I grab the T-shirt from him and put it on, then gather my clothes. My panties are beyond repair, though. “I’ll just throw these away.”

“Evie.”

I stop and turn slightly to him. He’s standing by the foot of his bed. We never even made it to the bed.

“I think we really need to talk.” Griff rakes a hand through his dark hair. “We’re about to graduate.”

I nod my head miserably, but brighten when I think of our conversation at the picnic. “But remember, we were going to visit each other. Every other weekend? We wanted to make this work, right?”

“It’s just . . .” Griff lets out a sigh. “It’s just that this has happened really fast.”

I nod my head in agreement and open my mouth to say—

“And maybe we need to take some time to think about this.”

“Some time?” I echo dumbly. “What do you mean by that?”

“Earlier tonight . . . when that car almost backed into us—”

“Yeah?”

“I was scared that I wasn’t going to be able to avoid that car, and that you would get seriously hurt—or die like my parents did.”

His parents died in a car crash. Why didn’t I put his reaction to the near-miss and that together until right now?

“Oh, Griff,” I say, softening. “But nothing bad did happen to me.”

“But it could have.” His eyes meet mine. “It could have,” he repeats. “And the thought of losing you like that, like how I lost my parents . . . it’s been in the back of my mind. I just can’t do that again.”

It feels like my heart stops. “What do you mean?”

“Maybe we should end this,” Griff says, “before we get more involved. Before either one of us gets really hurt.”

Too late for that, because I’m desperately in love with you.

“I thought you wanted to make this work,” I say again. “Were you just leading me on?”

“No,” Griff says sharply. “No, it’s just . . .
none
of this makes sense.”

“It doesn’t,” I agree. “But it doesn’t have to. I . . .”

“We don’t make sense.”

Oh.
Oh.

“It’s only been a few days,” he tries to explain. “We hardly talked before that night at the dock, and ever since then—”

“We’ve been on super speed,” I say. “Maybe it’s because of the short timeline. Like you said, we graduate in a few days. We’ve been making up for lost time, and I really want to make this work with you.”

“Evie, I’m not sure I want to do this anymore.”

“Why not?”

“Because that car almost backing into us shook me up. It made me realize what could happen . . . who I could lose—”

“You’re running scared,” I say in realization.

“I’m not running scared.”

“You’re pushing me away,” I continue. “You swerving to avoid the car is almost an everyday occurrence—”

“Except you were in the truck and I was driving, and—”

“And it brought up memories of your parents. I’m sorry about that, Griff. I really am.” I take a step toward him. “There are no guarantees in life. None. But don’t you want to take this risk together? We could see what happens, and—”

“Evie,” he says and pauses for a long moment. “You should get cleaned up. We can talk after.”

He’s breaking up with me, because of his past and what he fears for the future. Still . . .

He’s breaking up with me.

It hurts. It fucking hurts.

But maybe a shower will cool things down. Griff’s a thinker. It’ll give him time to think and he’ll realize that he’s being an idiot, and this will end up being nothing.

“Okay,” I say. “I’ll do that.”

I drop my underwear in the trashcan and leave to go to the bathroom. Mindful of the fact that there’s a party in full force, I clip up my hair and take a quick shower just to clean myself up.

Then, once I’m done, I put on my clothes and set my hair free. I tousle my curls and note my flushed cheeks, the slight smudge of eyeliner from the effects of the hot sex, swirling emotions, the shower, and my too-pale lips. Luckily I also have my purse with me, so I slide on some berry lip gloss and fix my makeup.

It doesn’t take me long. And after I set myself to right, I almost feel better.

Almost
being the key word.

When I leave the bathroom, I’m relieved to find Griff waiting for me outside.

“Do you want to go to your room and talk?” I ask.

“Sure,” he says and we head back to his room. We don’t sit down. He stalks across and stands by his desk and I stay by the doorway. It feels as if we’re on opposite ends of the Earth.

“So . . . are you breaking up with me?” I ask.

“Evie, where do you really see this going?”

“Us being together,” I say.

“A week ago, we hardly talked. You even said you hated me.”

“I thought you hated me,” I point out.

“I know,” Griff says. “But when we first hooked up, did you think . . .”

“That it was going to last? No. I didn’t know what to make of it, honestly. The next day, I decided I wanted to seek you out and see if there was anything there. And there was a lot of stuff there.”

So much so that I fell in love with him.

“And, yes, I am falling for you, but you’re an easy guy to fall for, Griff. You’re so kind and sweet and romantic, and you made me think . . .” Wow, this is actually hard to say, to put myself out there like this. “But you made me think we could have a future together. That you wanted to try. So, I guess I don’t really understand why you’re thinking so negatively.”

Griff doesn’t say anything in response.

I swallow hard. “If you thought I was only looking for a good time that night—that it was just a good time . . .”

“It
wasn’t
just a good time,” he says hotly. “It was more than that.”

“You’re running hot and cold, Griff. What am
I
supposed to think? Did you ever think about that? You’re the one who made the first move that night. You’re the one who brought me back here. You’re the one who asked me out at the BBQ and has gone after me. And furthermore, there’s nothing wrong with having a good time if that’s what we both wanted.”

“I know that.”

“You said you followed your instincts that night. That you went against your instincts when you insulted me at the dance all those years ago. That you regretted
not
asking me to dance that night. And now, you’re doing . . .” I wave my hands between us. “
This.
”

“It doesn’t make sense.”

“It doesn’t have to!” My throat tightens. “I thought you really liked me. You totally went after me, so I thought—”

“I won’t,” he says shortly.

“You won’t . . .”

“Fall for you,” he says. “I won’t let myself. Not after what almost happened tonight. It might seem minor to you, but I just can’t lose you like that.”

“So you’re going to lose me another way? That makes no sense. Why are you pushing me away? I’m standing here, telling you that I want to make this work with you, and you’re saying no.”

“I’m sorry, Evie. It’s just . . . I think it’s better this way, for the both of us. Less hurt.”

“I said I was falling for you earlier. You don’t think I’m hurting now?”

“Do you love me? Is that what you’re trying to say?”

I’m not going to confess to it now. No way. Not when he’s ending things. “Would it matter if I was?”

He doesn’t answer, and that in itself is everything I need to know.

“It’s just . . .” Griff clears his throat. “It’s just that love is too risky for me. So if you want that, it’ll be better for you in the long run that we end things now. You can—”

I blink. He has to be kidding. He has to be. “I’m confused. Are you saying that you’re
never
going to fall in love?”

“That’s what I’m saying,” he says.

I can’t breathe. Stars dance across my vision, but I pull myself together. There is no way I’m going to break in front of him. And surely he has to be kidding. He’s being stubborn. He lost his parents at a young age and doesn’t want to experience that kind of pain again.

“You’re scared,” I say. “You’re scared to love, to let yourself open up like that. You don’t want to get hurt again. But, Griff, you’re only going to hurt yourself by not letting yourself fall in love. And yeah, when someone you love dies . . . it’s horrible.”

“Stop,” he says harshly. “Stop before you say something we’ll both regret.”

I rear back, shocked and undeniably hurt. All I want to do is crumble to the floor. But I don’t. I refuse to. I turn my back on him and head down the stairs in a determined gait. By some miracle, Chloe and Taylor are at the bottom of the stairs, having just arrived at the party. They take one look at my face and know that something is wrong. They wait for me to reach them.

Chloe and Taylor don’t hug me or take my arm to support me. They know better than that. Instead they take my back, having it as always.

I don’t look back at Griff, to see if he left his room and followed me. My heart is broken. I lost because Griff didn’t even want to
open
himself up to the chance of exploring our relationship. He’s completely closed off to love. Even though I know that, all I want to do is turn around and run back upstairs and beg him to see reason.

I inwardly curse myself. I’m acting like a girl who doesn’t know better, and I am not new to this dating game.

He doesn’t want to date me any longer. He doesn’t want to fall in love. He’s never going to let himself fall for me.