Blinking his eyes several times in complete bewilderment, Rick realized he needed to launch an escape pod and get the hell out of this situation yesterday before Barbara erected a fucking lean-to and decided to camp out on his doorstep for the next hour. Feeling suddenly desperate, the next second Rick squeezed his abdomen, and he forced out what he hoped would be a little firecracker of a fart, just a little popper, a little warning shot across her bow. While he gave his gut a nice little internal pinch, the fart was actually much louder than he intended and even had a secondary, drawn out percussion following the initial weighty blast. Not only did his trumpet-like flatulence cause Barbara to pause and just stare at him in shock, as if he had just pulled a gun on her, but her little white foo foo dog started trembling and barking because it felt immediately threatened by the loud noises.
“Oh, excuse me... don't know where that came from?! You know, Barbara, I just got home. I really need to use the, uh, restroom. You'll have to excuse me. I'll talk to you some other time,” Rick quickly relayed, appearing modest but really wanting to laugh his ass off, especially at the dog's frightened response.
“Oh, all right. Well, if you have nothing else going on later at eight, come down to the common room. We could use your vote,” Barbara quickly rattled off, petting her fluffy dog, who continued to bark sporadically at him.
Smiling and nodding his head repeatedly, Rick slowly closed the door then, and once closed, he quietly giggled to himself. But then, just as he started laughing, he suddenly stopped as Barbara began knocking repeatedly on his door all over again and calling out to him.
“Oh, Rick! Rick, honey! I'm sorry! One more thing real quick!”
Straightening his face once again, Rick opened the door back up and looked at her expectantly.
“Oh, I wanted to tell you, real quick! You know I live below you, and I'm home alone all day... just keeping an eye on things. But anyway, I heard a loud bang noise during the day coming from your balcony. I don't know what it was, but it sounded like something heavy had fallen onto your balcony or something? You might want to check it out... That's all! Anyway, see you later at the meeting... at eight o'clock,” Barbara concluded, waving and then hurrying off down the hallway.
Nodding and then closing and locking the door behind him, Rick mumbled, “Ya, right. Good luck with the meeting.”
Immediately thinking of Suzi Melons and her cum-drenched face, Rick stared over at the pile of mail on the end table beside his rocking chair. Then, hearing cheering coming from the television, he turned and saw the Monarchs had just fallen behind another touchdown.
“Com'on, guys! Shit! The season isn't over yet. Don't pack it in,” Rick barked at the television, as if the players could hear him and would immediately rally at his words.
Rick had read all the preseason predictions, knew the Monarchs were not likely to make the playoffs, and were in last place in their conference, but it really bothered him to see them lose the games anyway. Suddenly remembering then what Barbara had told him about the noise on his balcony, Rick walked through his dinning area beside his kitchen, where he had a quaint table for two, and he stepped up to the sliding glass door of his balcony. As his condominium unit was on the thirteenth floor of a posh high-rise development, Rick could see the lights through the window of the other high-rises surrounding his own in the night.
Unlocking his sliding door, Rick flicked on the light for the balcony, and then he stepped outside and into the night. As it was fall, the air was biting, and he suddenly wished he had grabbed his jacket. Scanning all around the floor of the balcony, Rick could see his numerous potted plants in various stages of life and death. While some of the ornate pots had little more than dirt and the crumpled, brown remains of dead plants in them, other pots were full of leafy green vegetation and overflowing with life.
Crossing his arms over his chest and rubbing himself from the cold, Rick could see his breath billowing out of his nose and mouth in cloudy white vapors. He could also literally smell the coming rain in the air, and he knew that he'd likely need his umbrella tomorrow on his way back and forth from work. Quickly scanning the dozens of pots, his eye curiously caught then on something that appeared out of place.
Between two of the pots and snug up against the wall of the balcony railing, Rick saw what looked like a blueish-tinted liquor bottle. Knowing he never threw bottles out onto his balcony and not recognizing this particular bottle because of its distinct shape and color, Rick knew immediately this was not something he had left out there. Walking over to the ledge and leaning out over the railing, Rick stared up the high-rise to the countless balconies overhead, and he wondered if one of his dirty neighbors had thrown the bottle out. He sometimes got clumps of hair in his potted plants because one of the ladies above him cut peoples hair on her balcony and just threw the cut hair over, instead of throwing it out. As he stood there gazing up into the night, Rick wondered if this same messy hairdresser was the same person who had now thrown the strange looking liquor bottle out too? As littering was one of Rick's private pet peeves, he shook his head in disgust, and he thought to himself how he'd have to, yet once again, clean up after some fucked-up, lazy slob of a human being.
“I fucking hate people!” Rick breathed, suddenly shivering and just wanting to get back inside his warm condo as soon as possible.
Reaching down, Rick then grabbed the narrow neck of the bottle and lifted it up to examine it. Surprisingly, the bottle didn't appear to be cracked, nicked, or broken at all. He had no idea how a glass bottle could have been dropped from any of the balconies overhead and honestly not break on impact? Then, examining the fat, rounded bottom of the bottle, he saw one side of it was dirty, as if it had possibly landed in one of his empty pots with a dead plant in it and then bounced out.
Not wanting to spend anymore time outside than he absolutely had to, Rick just skipped inside his condo, closed his sliding glass door, and then shutoff his porch light. Holding the glass bottle up again, he inspected it better in the brighter, indoor light. The fat and rounded base of the bottle was a deep royal blue color, and then, along the bottle's narrow neck, the rich color then blended and faded into an oceanic blue towards the top of its neck. Unlike other hard alcohol bottles he had seen though, this particular bottle had deep etchings and a crisscross cut to the glass, which reminded him more of old china cut glass that his mom had when he was a kid, than a hard alcohol bottle. In addition, he didn't see any markings or lettering indicating what was inside the bottle. The glass too was a lot heavier than he expected, and it curiously didn't appear to have any liquid in it at all and was empty. Though he originally thought it might be a liquor bottle, he now saw it had a decorated cap, and it didn't appear to have been opened yet.
Appraising it in the brighter light, Rick found the bottle surprisingly pretty impressive, and Rick thought that it might actually make a cool decoration for his place. Though he had friends that liked to collect hard alcohol bottles and place them over their cabinets as drinking trophies, this wasn't something he did, as he wasn't much of a drinker. But this bottle looked pretty neat, and just the way the color changed from the deep blue to a pretty azure color up the neck was fascinating all on its own. Heck, it might even make a great conversation piece, as he could explain how he just found it out on his balcony.
As he continued to examine the bottle, Rick noted that it did need a little washing to get the dirt and dust off, but other than that, the glass didn't appear chipped, scratched, or otherwise damaged at all. The bottle was so nice, the thought then occurred to him that he might even be able to make it into a vase of sorts and put it on his kitchen table with the random flower in it or something. The only thing it appeared to need was a good wash and it would make a fine decorative piece to his humble little home. In the end, Rick decided it was actually a pretty cool find after all, but he still thought a plague needed to come to wipe out people who carelessly littered.
Still, he was pretty curious about what the bottle could have possibly been used for originally, so he grabbed the ornate cap in order to pull it off and then take a whiff inside. The cut-glass cap came off rather easily, but before he was able to put the bottle to his nose to take a whiff, strange smoke started puffing out from inside the bottle.
“What the fuck?!” Rick breathed, quickly putting the bottle down on his little table, taking a wary step back, and dropping the ornate cap onto the floor.
Within seconds, the few innocent wisps of hot pink fumes turned into a full fury of billowing smoke, as if the bottle had a raging fire inside. Along with the heavy smoke came a swishing sound, like the sound of dozens of birds streaking by overhead at the same time.
Immediately thinking he had unknowingly unleashed a fire inside his condominium, albeit one that lets off hot pink smoke, Rick turned and dashed a few steps to his locked front door. He knew there was a fire extinguisher right outside his door in the hallway, and he wanted to get to it before his place burned down or before the fire alarms started going off in the building.
Just as he reached his door and quickly began to unlock it, a cheery female voice suddenly spoke up from behind him, and he immediately stopped in his tracks and his eyes bulged in surprise.
“Thank you, Master, for setting me free!...”
After hearing this introduction, Rick slowly turned around, and he saw the hot pink smoke was quickly dissipating and standing next to this bottle was an absolutely stunning woman who was hardly wearing a damn thing. In fact, she was dressed just like a hot genie from a movie or television show.
Standing half-a-head shorter than him, the sexy blonde had her shinny hair wrapped up into a pony tail that danced behind her head with all her animated gestures. Though she had far more flesh showing than was covered, the outfit she wore was a mix of deep royal purple colors in some places and shimmering gold in others. Her eye-popping breasts were squeezed tightly together to her slender chest snugly by a tube-like top, which from the bottom, hung little bells that jingled every time she made the slightest movement. While both her slender arms were naked of any garment, she did have numerous bracelets of gold and precious stones around either wrist. Like her naked arms, her midriff was completely bare, and just below her cute little belly button, her tummy pooched out just a tad, a feature Rick particularly found sexy on a woman.
Shaped like a curvy exotic dancer, the seductive woman had so many alluring curves, Rick found himself gawking from moment one and staring at her with a deer-in-the-headlights kind of look on his face. Her privates were covered by what appeared to be a bikini-like bottom, but it had a long trailing golden fabric, which nearly touched the floor. Her wonderfully thick thighs and legs though were completely bare, except for a ring of bells around either ankle. As thick as she was around her hips and thighs, Rick wondered at what had to be a marvelously full ass behind her, and he openly speculated on how wet her pussy had to be if he ever had the joy of spreading her legs and sliding his penis up inside her beautiful body.
As she giggled playfully, his eyes finally left her shapely body and returned to her beaming face. Her eyes were the same color as the bottle, being dark blue near the pupils and then fading to a pretty azure color. While her nose was tiny and tilted slightly upwards, her lips were thin and painted in the same hot pink color as the smoke that had billowed out from the bottle hailing her arrival. In all, she reminded Rick of a sexy librarian, that, like a chameleon, could appear quite modest depending on what she wore, but in skimpy outfits and with her hair down, so to speak, she was a stunner and probably a real legend in the sack.
Instantly captivated and not quite believing his eyes, Rick just listened to her introduction and stared at her in absolute disbelief.
“... My name is Jizabel Rha Qwanaranrammy, Sixth Order Djinn of the Fwal Rhatha Clan, and certified personal manservant at your service!... Oh, and you can just call me Jizzy,” she concluded her introduction and then gracefully bowed.
Still in complete shock, Rick just watched her bow low and then fully erect herself, and his eyes couldn't quite leave her perky tits, which seemed to be calling to him like two playful puppy dogs. As Rick just stood there for a minute or two staring at her with a stupid expression on his face, Jizabel cocked her head to the side, giggled again, and then waited a moment before speaking.
“Do you not speak... English? Hablo espanol?”
“No... I mean, ya... I mean... Who...? Where... Where did you come from?” Rick stuttered, completely overwhelmed by her beauty and surprised entrance.