Dust (10 page)

Tammy was another person who joined the shelter, yet it didn’t fuel any tension. Mostly because two people didn’t have the energy, they were both ill. Tammy could throw a blanket over her arm and hide it, Sam couldn’t. I remember when I used to read about shelter conditions and illnesses; every book stated the heightened risk for respiratory infection. Sam was proving that theory absolutely correct.

His cough grew worse, and instead of the occasional hack, he launched into full-blown fits that lasted not seconds but minutes. I knew Sam was admitting defeat to feeling sick when he went to sleep before the rest of us. His face was flush, his skin warm and dry to the touch. Burke and I both checked to see if any of Sam’s injuries were showing signs of infection. Not even the head wound did, despite the fact it still hadn’t begun to heal. He slumbered deeply, no matter how much he coughed, and that was good. Sam needed that.

Unlike Sam, Tammy or Dan, the kids didn’t want to sleep. They didn’t want to run about, they just weren’t tired. Burke didn’t rest either. With the news that the military hadn’t even begun to ‘roll out’, the chance of looters increased. With each passing day without food, came another passing day of desperation for those who were wandering around. Burke took watch. In a chair on the landing, at the bend of the basement stairs, Burke sat. Shotgun perched across his lap, eyes peered to the door, there would be no remorse or hesitation on Burke’s part for anyone who entered that didn’t belong.

Stay up all night; sleep when he could during the day.

In the quiet of the night, voices carry. Burke must have been listening, because occasionally he’d sprout out a comment to add to the conversation I had with the kids. Simon sat to my right, Matty to my left, Davy directly in front of me, doing something I wished he wouldn’t do—skim through my sketchpad.

Davy snickered. “This is funny. Simon, look at how Aunt Jo drew you.”

Simon laughed. I winced.

“Like a baby doll.” Davy said, then flipped to another sketch.

“Davy, don’t smear those OK?” I instructed. “I don’t have anything to spray them with.”

“I’m not. I’m not.” He peered at another.

I tried to continue in my story to Simon and Matty. “Anyway, where was I?”

Burke replied from across the basement, “The cabin.”

“Mom?” Davy held up a picture. “Why did you draw a diagram of the basement? I mean we’re here.”

“Because you never know who’s gonna look at those.” I said. “That may very well be part of the new history books.”

Davy snickered.

“What?” I defended, “It could happen. Hey ... who knows. Maybe even our ‘AB’ time thing will carry on.”

From the stairs again, Burke commented, “I hate that.”

“Who cares,” I said. “Anyway. The cabin.” I inched Simon and Matty closer to me. “It’s a place not far from here, but far enough away that the bombs probably never touched it. It’s not too big ... ”

Burke interrupted, “It’s big. Bigger than this.”

I ignored him. “And you know how we have those jars to start our seedlings? Well, we’re gonna take the seedlings and plant them up there.”

Burke added his two cents worth. “After we lift the top of the soil.”

I rolled my eyes. “Whatever. Anyhow, there’s a ton of land too. Room to run, to play. Two acres.”

“Two point three.” Burke corrected.

I continued, “Lots of trees.”

“I cut half of them down.” Burke added. “Remember.”

“Enough trees, though to make it pretty.” I said.

“I put that fence up.”

“Burke!” I yelled. “Will you stay out of my story!”

“Tell it right and I will!” he hollered back.

“I’m trying to, but you keep interrupting.”

“I keep interrupting because you’re telling it wrong!”

There was one thing that Tammy was able to do, that no one else could—yell louder than Burke. In a deep, irritated, gurgling voice, she blasted, “Hey! Will you two knock it off? Some of us would like to sleep.”

“Well, sleep goddamn it!” Burke yelled. “No one’s stopping you.”

“You are!” Tammy barked. “You and your big mouth.”

“Hey!” Burke had a bite to his voice. “Me and my big mouth along with my big shotgun are watching out for your big ass, so deal with it!”

Silence.

“Oh, my God.” I whispered, and then exhaled. “Well, that’s where we’re going. Doesn’t it sound nice? A fresh start.” I glanced from Simon, to Matty to Davy.

“Aunt Jo?” Simon tugged on my arm. “Will my mommy be there?”

I didn’t hesitate, I just answered. “I don’t know, Simon. Maybe.”

“Is she still lost, Aunt Jo?” Simon asked.

“I think so, Simon.” I took in his innocent face; puppy eyes that peered up to me and I gently placed my lips to his forehead.

“Mommy?” Matty called me. “When? When are we going?”

“When everyone is together, then we’ll go. And ... ” I paused when Sam’s coughing carried to me. “And ... when everyone is well.”

“When will that be?” Matty questioned further.

“Soon.” My eyes made contact with Davy and I gave him a reassuring look. “Very soon.” Pulling Matty and Simon to me, I closed my eyes, blocked out the sounds of Sam’s coughing, and whispered to myself, “I hope.”
 

11. Realism
 

Just before dawn of day six AB, the airwaves went silent. Craig had stopped transmitting his hourly reports. Usually he’d sign off about midnight, later if he felt the initiative, then return at five the next day. We tuned in, Craig wasn’t there.

We heard from Tammy though. The first time in two days. At four days AB, she searched for Mick, came back for the night then left again. She took with her Burke’s radio and made one check-in call. It was to tell us she was heading south toward Mick’s father’s home.

Still, no Craig. No word. Then around seven in the morning, Craig showed up. The slight scuffling of his feet above our heads made Burke ‘weapons ready’. Until the door opened, and there was Craig ... alone.

He had stayed with a man named Bruce, but couldn’t convince Bruce to come along. Craig did however, bring two pieces of good news. The radiation levels fell just a tad below four roentgens per hour, and an Army medical rescue station was set up not a mile from my home.

With the deliverance of this news, my thoughts turned to Sam. He had worsened. Though he tried to maintain a level of usefulness, for the most part Sam had to rest. His breathing was labored, and coughing up the thick gunk lodged in his chest became a chore. Dan had appointed himself Sam’s personal nurse. ‘Out of the goodness of his heart and indebtedness to Sam’, Dan claimed. I believed he helped Sam only because it was the least menial of all jobs.

Even with Dan playing Florence Nightingale, Sam needed more help than we could give. The medical rescue station was it.

But Burke and Craig had other plans.

Aside from Mona, three other people were unaccounted for: Hebba, Nicky, and Rod.

Hebba was a traveling hospice worker, and she had three stops to make every day. Burke and Sam had checked two of those stops when Sam helped Burke. But Hebba wasn’t there. Burke figured she had to be at the third, she had to be.

As fate would have it, Nicky and Rod both worked within a few blocks from each other. On the outskirts of downtown, in a little section called Beachwood. Ironically enough, Hebba’s third stop for the day was near there as well.

Beachwood was close to ground zero; it was hard to determine whether or not it was actually still standing. But radiation levels had dropped, enough time had passed, Burke and Craig were forming a two-man search party, and were about to find out.

I followed Burke around the basement as he gathered items for the search. “But, Burke ... ”

Was Burke ignoring me? He kept a conversation with Craig about ropes, flashlights, and a small shovel. Things they would need.

“Burke.” I grabbed hold of his arm, and spoke with hard determination. “Listen to me!”

Burke finally turned to face me. “Jo, we want to head out. OK?”

“No, it’s not OK. Sam needs help.”

“I know Sam needs help.” Burke said, “But right now ... ”

“You’re blowing him off.”

“Jo!” Burke snapped. “We will get Sam the help he needs ... later.”

My eyes shifted to Sam who slept. His body propped up on four blankets. “Burke, if we can get him to the rescue station. Craig said there’s a rescue station.”

“I know. But right now, we’re headed in the complete opposite direction.”

I huffed out, “I can’t believe you are taking this attitude.”

“I asked Sam. Sam said to wait.”

“Oh.” I grunted in frustration. “Sam still doesn’t think he’s ill.”

Burke tossed a small rope to Craig, and then secured a hand revolver under his jacket. “Ready?” he asked Craig, ignoring me. They moved to the steps.

I was persistent. “Burke. Stop. The rescue station is only a mile away. Didn’t you listen to Craig?”

“Yeah, I did.” Burke spun around to me. “Didn’t you? Tell her Craig.”

“Jo.” Craig spoke calmly. “I told you, the rescue station was packed. No, more than packed. They’re saying it’s a two day wait for help.”

Burke stepped into the conversation. “Two days, Jo. You really wanna drag Sam down there to have him wait? Wait with all those people for two days? He’ll be more comfortable here. We’ll be gone a couple hours tops. We’ll work something out when I get back.” Giving a nod to Craig, Burke started to take the stairs.

“The hell with you then.” I barked. “I’ll go myself. I’ll go down there and get him something.”

Mid stairs, Burke stopped. “You will do no such thing. You hear me?”

“Yeah, I hear you.” I gave attitude. “But you’ll be gone, now won’t you?”

Burke’s face glared. “I swear to God, Jo, don’t you dare leave this shelter when I’m gone. You have three kids here. It’s a mad house out there. Your ass will stay put until I get back.” Burke gave a firm point. “Stay here.” He turned, said no more and walked up the steps.

After giving an apologetic look, Craig followed Burke.

How long did I stand there? Standing with my arms folded defiantly, I watched their legs disappear up the steps, then the slamming basement door caused a painful jolt through my body. I heard the walking above me, and I knew when they were gone.

My head dropped.

Dan’s slow sigh rang out near my ear as he stepped beside me. “For what it’s worth, you were right.”

Barely did I face him to speak, when Davy jumped a defensive.

“No, she’s not.” Davy argued. “Burke’s right. Sam said to wait. She should wait.”

“No.” I muttered softly. “No, I should go. Go now, I won’t be long.” I moved away from the staircase. Pretty much, I was all ready to go, since I thought Burke was taking Sam and me to the station. All I needed were my gloves, sunglasses, and bandana. Those I found with little problems.

“Mom, no.” Davy followed me. “Please don’t. Burke said ... ”