Elysium (3 page)

Cool crisp air brushed against his cheeks. The trees were losing their green and turning gold and yellow. There was a tinge of the winter cold that was to come. It was bracing. The walk to the gym always cleared his head. He stopped at the front desk and the usual guy was there with his over-whitened teeth. Adrian handed him his gym ID card to wave over the scanner to a beep. White Teeth handed the card back and said, “Have a good workout” in a syrupy, synthetic voice. He knew. Everyone knew. It was a small neighborhood.

“Thanks.”

Adrian started his workout with a run on the treadmill. He selected the James Taylor playlist on his personal player and exercised to its sad, country-styled rhythms. He never told Antoine about his Taylor workouts. He would probably laugh and say, “I’m taking away your gay card.” Adrian smiled to himself at the untold joke. It was a strange feeling, to smile.

He was hot and sweaty by the time he reached the weight room. “The boys” were all there. They waved hellos. Those guys seemed to live here. Muscles were flexing everywhere. The room smelled of men. Hot, sweaty men. It wasn’t a pleasant smell, in some ways. In others, it was irresistible. Adrian suddenly felt the need to focus.

Hector waltzed over and slapped him on the shoulder. “Hey, Papi. How you doin’?”

“Hi, Hector,” he said, his arm fully engaged in lifting a weight. He used that as an excuse to not look up.

“What happen to your head?”

“A small accident. It’s nothing.”

“An accident? Oh, Papi, you know you gotta be careful.”

“Yeah,” Adrian said, still not looking up.

“Well, we goin’ to brunch in a few minits. You comin’?”

“Where?”

“The usual place. Notin’ special.”

“Yeah, sure. Let me shower and I’ll be out.”

“No problem, Papi. We wait for you.”

The usual place was the brunch
spot
. Everyone from the neighborhood was there. Adrian and Antoine used to come here together back before he got sick. They would meet up with friends and laugh for hours on a Sunday mid-morning, as Adrian was about to do. The twelve of them asked for the big table in the corner. When they were seated Hector dropped himself into a chair far on the other side. Adrian was glad for that. It felt good to be out with the boys. They were buffed, beautiful men, and they knew it. The waiter flirted with them and wiggled his back feathers. They laughed at his antics. They laughed at each other. They just laughed. Especially Adrian. Once a week for this. This one time to forget about it all and laugh.

It was lunch for Adrian — he’d been up since early. For the others, it was still breakfast time. Pancakes and waffles and scrambled eggs was the going fare. Adrian liked the blueberry pancakes here, so that’s what he ordered — to be one with the “fellas” — with a tall glass of orange juice.

Adrian could feel everyone being extra nice to him. He did his best to ignore it. But once in a while, the heat of someone’s long stare burned the back of his neck, and he couldn’t help meeting the sympathetic eyes of a friend. Adrian would turn away quickly. He didn’t want sympathy. He wanted a normal time. His laugh was as loud as anyone’s — maybe a bit louder.

When brunch was over, they settled up the bill and said their goodbyes. Tommy hugged him extra tight. The sound of him drawing back sniffles filled Adrian’s ear. When their embrace ended, he kissed Adrian on the cheek and was all smiles.

“You be strong, ’kay,” Tommy said.

Adrian watched the group file away into different directions until they were finally gone. Now it was just Adrian and Hector.

They walked up the street together, glancing in the shop windows. This was an area for tea shoppes, clothing boutiques, antique stores, and such. They stopped at a store with a display of scarves and knickknacks.

“Dey have the best candles in here,” Hector said and pulled open the door. Adrian followed. Hector fussed about, sniffing at candles of all sizes. Adrian stood by a table of glass figurines. He held one of the delicate animals up to the light. It was a translucent elk with winding antlers elegantly formed high upon its tiny head. Hector returned with a candle in hand.

“Smell dis,” he said shoving the candle in Adrian’s face. “Isn’t dat purfect?”

“It’s nice,” Adrian replied.

“Good, ’cus I’m getting it.”

Hector collected two more candles and went to the counter to pay for them.

They left the shop and entered the not-so-busy street. A few people passed, no one interesting.

“You wanna come over my howse?” Hector asked.

“Yeah,” Adrian said, “let’s go.”

The hallways echoed their steps as they made their way to Hector’s apartment. Occasionally they passed a door where the sound of music or yelling or the roaring giddiness of children’s laughter could be heard. Adrian stood behind Hector as he turned the many locks to his door. It opened to a very small place. Hector lived alone, so that was okay. He opened the window to let in the cool afternoon breeze.

“Papi, you wan anythin’ to drink?”

“No, I’m good,” Adrian said as he sat down on the big, black, almost-leather sofa. It made a farting sound as he sank into it. He adjusted himself to make sure that he made the sound again.

“I’ll be right out,” Hector said and disappeared into his bedroom.

Hector came back and sat next to Adrian with smiling eyes. He placed a box of condoms on the coffee table. Adrian unbuckled his belt and slid open his fly. His penis practically popped out. Hector touched him there, and Adrian bit at his lower lip.

“Don’t worry, Papi. It’s alright,” Hector said in a whisper and went down on his knees in front of Adrian, stroking his cock. Adrian closed his eyes and fell into the moment. Sinking into the couch, he felt Hector’s tongue on him and then the condom came slowly rolling down, then a whole mouth. Hector slurped and slurped and gently pulled. When Adrian opened his eyes, it was to stare out the window. An owl was there. Its white heart-shaped face blinked. Adrian closed his eyes again. Her long legs surrounded him. Her soft breasts brushed his chest. She opened and forced herself down on his member to grind. God, it felt so good. Adrian reached up to cup her breasts. Her nipples were hard in his palms.

“Helen …” he whispered. She moaned. He grabbed behind her to pull her ass down.

>>

>>

** SYSTEM INTERRUPT **

ERROR: FRAGMENTATION

ERROR: CORRECTED

BRIDGE PROCESS: **RESUMED**

.
.
.

A head of curls filled Adrian’s hands as Hector worked his tongue all over his cock. Hector reached his hand down there. Adrian couldn’t stop.

“I’m sorry … I …”

The tears came, and he released into sorrow.

Hector finished by stroking his deflating thing. It was still sensitive and moved to his touch.

“Is there something you wanna tell me, Papi?”

“Wha?” Adrian said dreamily, tears streaming down his cheeks.

“Who’s Helen?” Hector looked up. Then he noticed Adrian’s face and stopped smiling. “Oh, Papi. You alright?”

Adrian wiped his face and didn’t answer, but eased himself up. Hector moved out of the way.

“I need to shower,” Adrian said and went to the bathroom.

This would be Adrian’s third shower of the day. He stepped into the stall, feeling the warmth of the flow fall over his head and shoulders. He soaped himself and pulled at his penis. He wanted to be clean. The thought of Antoine and his frail skin lying in his sickbed filled his chest. Adrian leaned on the wall as the water from his eyes mixed with the water of the shower. Hector came in.

“Papi … You okay?”

“Yeah,” he lied.

He didn’t turn around.

Hector undressed and slipped into the shower. He stroked Adrian and soaped him all over — first his back, then shoulders, then his butt. Hector fingered him. Adrian didn’t like this part, but it was what Hector needed.

“Ay, Papi …” Hector reached around to Adrian’s cock, pulled gently, entered him.

“Ay … Ay … Ay … Ay … Pa-pi … Ay …”

Adrian went away somewhere and was someone else.

Hector lifted Adrianne, she was so light. She held onto the shower rod as he pulled into her. He cupped her breasts in his hand. The water and soap made them slide. Adrian felt dizzy. He was himself again and stroked his chest. It was muscular and flat.

“Ay … Ay … Ay … Ay-yay-yay … ooooohhhhh, Paaaapeeeee …”

Hector panted on Adrian’s back and gently kissed him there. “Mi amore, Papi,” he said and slipped out of the shower. Adrian rinsed himself as Hector left him alone in the bathroom. He found a towel and wrapped it around his waist, then sat on the toilet seat lid and bowed his head.

Adrian was fully dressed when he came out of the bathroom. Hector, still in a towel, had a beer waiting for him. Adrian took a few sips, tasted the light bitterness, then put the bottle down.

“Will I see you again next week?” Hector asked.

“Maybe.” Adrian didn’t know what else to say.

“It’s alright, Papi. I understand. … How is Antoiny?”

Adrian hated that he used his name. And no one called him “Antoiny.”

“He’s okay.” Adrian corrected himself, “He’s the same.”

“Oh.”

“I need to go home now. The nurse will be leaving soon.”

Hector touched his face and said, “Mi amore, Papi. It’s gonna be alright.”

Adrian hated him for that.

He grabbed his jacket from the hook behind the door and left.

Home was a place of sorrow. A place of love. It was difficult to reconcile the two. All the silence of the world was there. It was as if they lived in a special bubble separate from all that existed in time and space. Adrian didn’t want to live in that bubble. But it was where Antoine lay, so it was where he must go.

“Hey, baby,” Sheila said. “You enjoy your time off?”

Adrian mumbled. Then smiled, remembering that he shouldn’t be rude.

“It was okay.”

Sheila had been cooking. The sweet smell of her curried meat scented the air. This was not a required duty, but she did it anyway. At first, Adrian thought she did it because she wanted bigger tips. Then he realized the true reason was much simpler, purer: she liked them.