Embattled Minds (Military Romance) (Lost And Found Series) (10 page)

“I don’t need your p-pity, Ember.”

She jumped in front of him just before he pulled the door open.

“What the hell are you talking about? The kiss?”

He grimaced, lending a darker edge to his face. Anger flashed in his look. “Yes, the damn kiss. A simple th-th-thank you would have b-been just fine. You didn’t have to act as if y-you wanted m-me.”

She frowned. “I wasn’t acting. I do want you.”

He snorted, shaking his head. “It doesn’t matter.”

“It does. I just haven’t been in this position before.”

“What po-position would that be, Ember? Being attracted to somebody who’s so fugly he disgusts you? And can’t fucking talk? But feeling obligated to try to pay him back for standing up for you with your father?”

“Quit saying that, damn it! You have no idea what I’m thinking. Yes, I am attracted to you, but the only thing fugly about you is your attitude right now.” She shoved her hair away from her face, angry, then held up a single finger. “I’ve been with one man in my life. One. And I had a son from that one night. So excuse me if I would like to try to slow down and enjoy this.” She waved a hand between them.

Zeke blinked at her as if he didn’t believe her words. “One man?”

She pursed her lips and crossed her arms over her breasts, unwilling to repeat herself.

“You didn’t pull away because of my scars?”

Ember shook her head at his bullheadedness. “No, I didn’t pull away because of your scars. Believe it or not, I like your scars. And your stutter doesn’t bother me.” Unable to help herself, she reached up and ran her finger over the faded silver line that ran into his lip. “But I won’t just sleep with somebody again because it’s convenient. I need more out of a relationship than that. And while I do appreciate your help with my dad and everything, I’m offended at the insinuation that I’d sleep with you to pay you back.”

Zeke winced and leaned back against the wall beside the door. He tipped his head back and barked out a laugh, Adam’s apple bobbing in his strong throat. When he looked at her again, his eyes were more calm. “I’m sorry I s-said t-that. I was just being de-de-defensive, I guess.”

Ember could understand the reaction, but it was hard to hear. “Zeke, I wouldn’t have you in my home right now if I didn’t feel something for you. I felt something the first time you walked into the grill.”

She could feel red creep into her cheeks, but she maintained the eye contact, knowing it was important to him.

“I d-d-did too.”

A warm feeling curled though Ember’s belly at his quiet admission, tempting her all over again. “Really?”

Reaching out, he tugged on a section of her hair. “I wanted to see this down around your face. Or spread across a pillow.”

Ember shut her eyes as the vision hit her.

“Or swaying as I rock you from behind.”

She moaned and something released in her lower body. She shifted, wet panties dragging against her sensitive skin. Her nipples had already hardened, chafing against her clothes. She itched to rip her sweatshirt and bra off and cash in on his words. It had been so long since she’d felt like this. No, she’d never felt like this.

When she opened her eyes, Zeke’s face had suffused with color and he stared at her hard, obviously waiting for some kind of indication of what she wanted. One hand flexed against his side. As she watched, his second palm reached forward to cup her breast.

Ember didn’t wait for his hand to connect. She leaned into his touch, gasping as his thumb immediately started to stroke back and forth over her nipple. “Oh, God. More.”

Zeke grasped a handful of her hair in his hand and tilted her head back for his kiss. Ember cried out as his mouth settled on hers and his other hand left her breast to cup her pelvic bone, grinding the seam of her jeans into her heat. She arched her hips into his touch, desperate for more. As his tongue swept inside her mouth, he tightened his fist in her hair, forcing her to accept every bit of him.

Sensation overwhelmed her as his touch tried to burrow through the fabric of her jeans and inside her. His strong hand forced her up onto her tiptoes as he moved unrelenting fingers back and forth over her pelvic bone, and her clit.

Ember whimpered against his mouth, afraid that the heat building in her body would burn them up. She tried to pull away, afraid of what he was making her feel, but he tightened his grip on her. She clutched at his face, knowing if he let her go she’d fall to the floor, boneless with need.

“I want you to come for me, Ember. Give me that.”

She rocked her hips against his hand, and that small concession was enough to trip the trigger. Release rocked through her body, making her cry out as she ripped her mouth from his. Her knees gave way, but he had already released her hair to wrap an arm around her back. He supported her as aftershocks rolled through her, one after another.

When she eventually looked up, he grinned at her. His satisfied expression made her laugh. “You look very smug.”

He laughed with her, pulling her into his arms. She felt him press a kiss against her head. She wrapped her arms around his waist to keep herself anchored, inhaling his spicy scent.

“You know, I u-u-used to be really good at pleasing women. And that’s not ego. I had a lot of practice when I was y-y-young and good looking.”

She pulled back enough to look up at him, intrigued. “Really?” She stepped back, holding one of his hands. “I think you need to show me. Again.”

Zeke looked down at her hand in his own, then up to her face. “You n-n-need to be sure, Ember. And you need to be aware, this is n-not a one night thing. If you l-l-l-l-let me in now, I’m going to be here a w-while.”

She continued to tow him through the living room and down the hallway to her room. “Good,” she whispered.

Z
eke didn’t know what scared him more: the look in her eyes or the realization that he was about to have sex for the first time in four years.
Definitely the look
.

He could not have changed the course of his feet if he tried, though.

Ember tugged him down the hallway, only pausing long enough to peek in at her sleeping son. She shut Drew’s door securely and when they entered her own bedroom, she engaged the lock beside the door knob. Zeke knew the flimsy little piece of metal wouldn’t be enough to keep him out, but hopefully it would a child.

They stepped into the bedroom and his disbelief intensified. She was going to do it. Him. As if he were normal, and not some fucked up science experiment. She said the scars and the stuttering didn’t bother her, but he didn’t understand how they
couldn’t
. They sure as hell bothered him. Every damn hour of every day.

She turned to face him at the edge of the bed. The light from the open bathroom door was just enough to show him the insecurity on her face. Her hands tangled in front of her stomach and he was struck with how nervous she was.

“It’s n-not too late to change your mind.”

She blinked up at him, and smiled. “I’m not going to change my mind, I’m just not sure how to start.”

Taking his courage in hand, he stepped forward and settled his lips onto hers. She moaned, curling her fist into his shirt. He liked that one small action of hers, because it magnified how tiny she was compared to him. He dwarfed most of the population, and the attention that brought made him extremely uncomfortable now. During his football years, he’d relished the attention.

Years ago. A lifetime ago.

He loved impressing Ember with his size.

Zeke rested his hand on the curve of her hip, his thumb finding its way beneath the edge of her sweatshirt. He pulled away from her mouth. “C-c-can I take this off?”

She nodded and he peeled it up over her head. The sheet of her dark hair shone in the light as it swayed around her body. Without his urging, she reached behind herself and unfastened the white bra, flinging it aside. Zeke almost nutted in his jeans when he saw her plump breasts for the first time.

They were perfect. Dark pink nipples puckered in the coolness of the room, begging for attention. Reaching out, he brushed against the bottom swell, still half thinking he was in a dream and she was going to shut him down at any second. But she didn’t. She leaned into his touch just like she did before, moaning. Using both hands, he cupped her breasts, rubbing his thumbs over the tips. A shiver coursed through her and she grabbed his wrists.

A bolt of mindless fear hit him, because he didn’t want her to push him away. If she wasn’t ready for this, he would force himself to step away, though it would quite possibly kill him. Instead, she pressed his palms to her even harder, making him thankful he’d found her all over again.

He looked down as he pressed her breasts up and together. His mouth watered at the thought of taking her into his mouth.

Zeke knelt in front of her, glad of his height because it put him at mouth level with her chest. Replacing his hands with his lips, he sucked her nipple deep into his mouth. Ember cried out and wrapped her arms around his head, scraping her fingernails back through his scalp. His stomach bottomed out yet again when he realized she had to be feeling the ridges of his scars underneath his hair, but she didn’t even seem to notice. She clutched him to her and pressed kisses to the top of his head.

Zeke hesitated, letting her nipple go. Emotion made his eyes burn. The unrelenting loneliness he normally fought had been pushed away by her slender arms and the cushion of her body. He rested his forehead against her, wanting to soak in the moment.

Ember seemed to understand because her movements slowed, then stopped completely, until she just held him to her.

He felt like a pussy, letting her cradle him like this, but he’d missed being close to another person. Talking to them without the fear they were going to cringe from his looks, or history, or, God forbid, because
they
were uncomfortable.

He hated feeling like he had to apologize for the way he looked. He’d served his country with pride, and done a lot of shit that nobody else would.

The woman in front of him had never given him reason to feel inferior. In anything.

Leaning away from her touch, he started to unfasten her blue jeans. She shuddered as his hands brushed against the smooth skin of her belly. Spreading the zipper placket, he pressed a kiss just above the elastic band of her underwear, then started to tug her jeans down over her hips.

Beautiful. Exactly as he expected her to be. Her belly was slightly rounded and a few faint silver lines marred the perfection of her skin. He pressed kisses to everything he revealed. Desperate impatience threatened to speed his actions, but he was going to take his time. It had been years since he’d been with a woman; he planned to prolong this as long as humanly possible.

As he dragged her jeans down her thighs, she rested a hand on his shoulder to balance when she stepped out of them. Zeke groaned as he caught sight of the wet spot on the light blue cotton of her panties. Unable to do otherwise, he gripped her hips in his hands and dragged her to his mouth, inhaling the scent of her earlier release. He ripped her underwear away and paused to dance his fingers through the dark silky hair. “B-beautiful.”

Using one finger to part her folds, he groaned at the slick heat that encased him. There was no way on Earth that that kind of arousal could be duplicated, and it told him more strongly than anything else that she was attracted to him. No matter the scars. No matter the stuttering.

He glided his finger forward in her heat until he found her clit, distended and ready for more attention. Making slow, subtle circles, he taunted her as he refocused his mouth to her pouting breasts. Her hips started to shift in time with his movements, and he could sense when she neared her peak. Drawing his finger down, he angled it up into the depths of her body.

Ember moaned and sagged against him. “Yes, that’s where I need you. Please.”

Zeke plunged his finger into her body, focusing on the spot just behind her pelvic bone that caused so much pleasure. As her body began to move faster, nearing orgasm, he pulled away.

He ached with need to taste her, to be inside her, but he wanted her release again. By the time he was done with her, she wouldn’t care what he looked like.

Pushing to his feet, he lifted her in his arms and took the few steps to the bed. He laid her diagonally across the mattress, then stepped away long enough to rid himself of his own clothes. He was glad for the cover of night, because his body wasn’t what it used to be. Yes, he kept in shape, but the aftereffects from that explosion could be seen all over his skin.

Shrapnel scars, surgery scars on his thigh where they’d inserted the rod.

Those worries faded away, though, as she opened her arms to him. He took long enough to sheath himself with a condom from his wallet and he was on her. Kissing her lips, he nibbled his way down her neck and chest, relishing in her scent, then down the center line of her abdomen. Zeke felt her breath catch as he hovered over the moist heat at the apex of her thighs. She shifted beneath him, her body hungry for what he could provide. Shifting further down, he used his palms to spread her lean thighs.