The light around me turned pure white, and
all around me and Drake were memories, memories of us together. I
felt every emotion that I’d had in a forgotten past: infatuation,
the rush of our first kiss, the passion when he held me for the
first time...I saw myself look at him in adoration as he played
with our children...my heart raced as I felt the emotions over and
over again, as if I were feeling them for the first time.
As he pulled me gently to him, Drake’s eyes
were tender, almost pleading. “Will you ever remember the love we
have?” he whispered.
I closed my eyes and let Landen’s memories
come to me. I could call them forth, but they were overshadowed by
the last memory I had – which was of Landen loving another. I tried
to reason with myself that this was all an illusion, but I was
losing the battle; illusions couldn’t be felt by my gifts. I sighed
deeply, holding back the scream that wanted to come out. I then
began to argue with my sense of reason.
“You were going to allow me to die; I only
had moments left. You don’t let someone that you love dance that
close to the cliff.” My words were cruel.
As I felt his lips land tenderly on my
forehead, all the tension left my body; he was taking my pain away
once again, but I knew it was a mask...as soon as his touch left
me, the pain would be there - and I’d rather suffer than live a
lie.
“I would have brought you back; you know I
would have been able to,” he said, moving his hands to my face.
I opened my eyes and placed my hands on his,
then gently pulled them away from my face. “I wouldn’t have wanted
you to,” I said in a voice slightly above a whisper.
He looked at me in utter disbelief. “You see
him love another woman - and now you want to die? I tell you what:
that might not be such a bad idea - but make sure you kill me
first. I believe it’s my turn in the next life anyway; at least I
won’t have to fight so hard to make you see who you truly belong
with,” Drake said hoarsely.
“This isn’t a game. Your turn? Are you
serious?” I said, appalled.
As Drake briskly grabbed my shoulders and
turned me, the memories around us fell, and in the darkness my
worst nightmare was in front of me: Landen and the beautiful woman.
Drake wrapped his arms around me tightly, giving me no way out.
“All those lives we lived together, those lives we loved each other
– what do you think Landen was doing? Do you think he lived a life
alone? He gave his heart away; the truth is in front of you.”
I closed my eyes; seeing Landen hold that
woman was beyond any pain I’d ever experienced. Drake slowly turned
me back to him and searched my face for understanding.
“He doesn’t want to see; he wants to live a
life hidden from the power. You don’t have that option - you
are
the power, and whoever your give you heart to must
acknowledge that and stand in front of billions.” I didn’t say
anything. Drake’s eyes searched across my face, trying to read me.
“If you love him, let him be happy - in love, alone. I love you
more deeply than he does; let me show you...I will lead with
you...I will keep you safe,” he said charismatically.
I looked down at the ground, then up at
Drake; at that moment, I felt sure of myself, certain. I stepped
back away from his touch, then turned and walked away.
“Where are you going?” Drake yelled after
me.
“Home,” I said in a stern voice.
Drake pulled my energy to him, spinning me
around. He then reached his arms around me and held me tight. “This
is your home,” he said in disbelief.
“No, this was never my true home,” I said
confidently.
“Love, this is the only home you have now,”
he said, raising his eyebrows.
I looked past him at Landen and the woman;
her head was lying on his chest as he held her tight. I bit my
bottom lip, pushing down the pain, the rage.
“You love me,” Drake said.
I looked back up at him, then moved my eyes
to Landen and stared. I felt the love he was giving that girl, and
I didn’t want to get even - I wanted revenge. I looked back up at
Drake and let my eyes search his face, his perfect features, then I
settled in his eyes. I tried to see his soul, to feel something
from him, anything that would tell me that I could trust him. I
slowly reached my hands to his face and let my fingers run across
the base of his eye. I then stood on my tiptoes and pulled him down
to me, kissing him, feeling his release, taking in the relief from
the pain that was coursing through me. Drake’s arms wrapped around
me, and in that moment I felt empty, lost; not only could I never
love him, I could never love another. I slowly moved my lips from
his and lowered my hands.
“I told you before, I don’t want to hurt
anyone,” I whispered. His faced mirrored the pain he knew I was
about to deliver. “I can’t give you what isn’t mine,” I continued,
tilting my head toward Landen. I then creased my eyebrows as the
pain made itself known across my face. “Landen will carry it
through eternity.”
As the pain in his face intensified, his
grip on me loosened. I turned to leave again, struggling to find
the strength to put one foot in front of another, the strength to
leave Landen behind. Suddenly, a vibration swept through the room,
taking my breath away.
“Willow,” I heard Landen say.
I slowly turned to see that Drake and the
woman had vanished. Landen was just feet away, staring at me. I
covered my mouth; even though the woman was gone, in my mind I
could still see him holding her - and I turned away from him before
the pain brought me to my knees. As I started to run to the
passage, I could feel Landen’s fear and confusion; he was right
behind me and caught me just feet from the passage.
He turned me around and put both his hands
on my face. I kept my eyes closed tight; my whole body was
tense.
“Willow, talk to me. What happened? Did he
hurt you?” Landen screamed as rage came over him.
“Where is she?” I screamed.
“Willow, open your eyes. Look at me. Where
is who?” Landen yelled back.
With his last words, I slowly opened my eyes
and looked into his. “The woman you were holding...the one you
love,” I said, afraid and hurt.
Landen’s anger was taken over by confusion,
and his eyes danced wildly over my face. “That was you. I saw you
in every life, at every age. I saw how our love was more powerful
than we’d ever thought,” he said quickly.
I shook my head no over and over again. “I
saw her, Landen. I saw you with her - that wasn’t me.”
Landen looked over his shoulder to where he
was standing before, then back at me. “Our eyes were the enemy; he
fooled us both,” he said breathlessly, pulling me to him and
kissing me through my tears.
“Where is he, Willow?” Landen said as he let
me go.
As my eyes raced back and forth, anger
filled me as I realized that I’d played the part of a fool once
again. The girl looked so real; the memories, the emotions...I saw
them...I felt them.
“I don’t know. He vanished when the girl
did,” I said, reaching my arms around Landen as I filled with
relief. I had chosen again, and I chose who I always knew I
would.
Landen looked back to the rings; they were
still spinning. He let his hand fall down into mine, then pulled me
slowly toward them as they spun wildly.
As we came closer, the rings began to slow
and move forward along the water. The white lights parted,
welcoming the passage, which was now just feet away. Suddenly, the
rings stopped completely. In the center, suspended in thin air was
a small star. Landen looked back at me, then to the star, and he
let his hand slowly slip out of mine. He stepped forward
confidently. Inside the rings, he reached for the star and grasped
it in his hand. They slowly began to move. Landen then looked down
and took a breath. At that moment, he felt the power; if he chose
to look, the universe would follow his intent, not their own -
something neither of us wanted. It would take all of his strength
to step away from such a welcoming seduction of power. He smiled at
himself, then stepped back out of the rotation of the rings.
He walked back to me. With one hand, he
turned the charm on my neck; with the other, he placed the star
behind the sun and the moon. The charm let out a breathtaking
light, and the rings hummed. Landen then looked into my eyes
through the light and leaned forward and kissed me tenderly.
A loud roar made us both jump. Behind
Landen, the rings began to break apart and the calm sparks grew
violent, causing an array of colors to come as the energy in the
room shifted. As Landen put his arm around me and we ran for the
passage, a heavy vibration soared through the room, pushing us.
We took each other’s hands and ran to the
passage through which we’d passed through; on the other side, we
could still see the flicker of the massive fireplace. When we
reached the threshold, we saw Donalt’s empty wheelchair; his body
was lying beside it. Landen slowly walked to where he lie, griping
my hand; both our hearts were racing.
Landen slowly reached down to Donalt’s wrist
to feel for a heartbeat.
“Nothing,”
he thought.
A clap of thunder erupted, shaking the walls
around us. Landen stood up slowly, and we watched as Donalt’s old,
gray, frail body fell into ash. A gust of wind then came out of
nowhere and swept his ashes into the large fireplace, and the
flames erupted in every direction as they took in the remains of
the once powerful ruler.
The room around us began to shake as the
lighting and thunder crashed against the palace. We ran through the
doorway, down the hallway, across the banister, and down the
stairs. The doors we’d passed through before were still open.
Outside, we could see the ashes spinning
wildly around in the violent wind. We looked at each other and held
on tight, then began to run into the storm. In the center of the
court, my willow tree remained untouched, glowing in the midst of
turmoil. Passing it, we made our way to the gates of the
courtyard.
There, our mouths dropped and our eyes
widened: the wind on the streets was still, and there was a calm
like no other. Above us, the gray sky was being pulled to the
palace, and crystal blue skies were left in its wake. The sun
beamed down on the once gloomy, gray streets, and the people,
buildings. Everything gray around them moved to the sky to be taken
by the current of the rapidly moving gray clouds. In the wake of
the current, color was everywhere; the buildings turned white, and
the people themselves seemed to be consumed by beautiful color,
which brought life to their faces.
In this process, the world around us
changed, and we saw our place in flashes; the place we’d always
dreamed of, the place that had no sound - only pure beauty. I
gasped, taking in its exquisiteness. As our hearts raced, Landen
held me tight. That perfect place was what this dimension was
supposed to be. We’d been given a gift, a glimpse of what our
suffering would buy when all the trials had passed.
In a flash, we were back, standing at the
breaking dawn of a new life for these people. Our family was
standing in the center of the street. Staring behind them, we
walked slowly to them. I embraced my parents’ soul, then my
grandparents, reaching to hold Landen’s family and our friends.
Then, I turned slowly to look back at the palace.
Surrounding the massive palace was a dark,
swirling cloud, so dark that the palace itself couldn’t be seen. As
thunder roared behind it, lightning flashed through; it was as if
the darkness that this city once carried had become centered in one
place, leaving freedom, love, and peace for the people that lived
there.
Patrick walked slowly to me and Landen.
Behind him was a mass of people; their faces bore pure shock, but
in their eyes there was an awakening, a peace.
“You shall rule us now,” Patrick said to
Landen.
The crowd erupted, sending a burst of energy
through us. Smiling, Landen raised his hands to calm them. “I will
not rule over you,” he said loudly, looking across at all of
them.
The crowd began to rumble, and their fear
and uncertainty came to them again.
“Who will, then?” Patrick asked for them
all.
Landen smiled widely and looked at our
family and me. A moment later, he let his eyes move across the
people for whom he’d always held a deep remorse. “Within each of
you there is soul that can rule, a soul that should only rule your
own heart. You must forget the lies that were spoken over you;
everyone is worthy of love and calm. In each moment, your thoughts
lead your ambitions. This power will frighten you at first, but you
must move past that. Understand that you are all connected.
Everything that you want, want it for the universe, want it to
bring yourself closer to the heavens. Willow and I, our family,
will help guide you, but the days of following one man are
over.”
I felt the pride coming from our family; it
was hard to say who felt it more. Silence came over the crowd as
they looked around at each other, questioning the words they’d just
heard. In the center of the crowd, a small clap could be heard;
there, a little boy smiled wildly and cheered. His parents then
began to clap, and applause soon erupted from them all.
We took a deep breath and passed through
them; as we did, we felt the souls of our dimension follow us. Once
in the string, we found it calm, still; more still than it was near
our home. I smiled, feeling the victory, and Landen and I all but
ran home; we wanted to make sure Stella had recovered.
Chapter Twenty
When we passed through our gates, we saw
Allie awake and lying in her carrier, smiling up at us; her Aura
was so white. I reached down, gently picked her up, and felt a warm
rush of unconditional love run through me. I kissed her forehead,
sending the same love back to her tiny body.