“Scrambled eggs? I can make that if you
help me.”
He nodded in agreement, so I sat him on the
kitchen counter, getting him to whisk up the eggs and then he buttered her
toast while I cooked. When we threw it on a plate, it didn
’
t look particularly appetising. Hopefully she
’
d like it, if not then I could take her out for something else to
eat once DJ
’
s dad came to pick him
up.
If
he came anyway. Personally, I hoped he didn
’
t so I could take them both with me to the beach to meet my mom.
After setting a cup of coffee on the tray,
I lifted DJ down from the counter. “Come on then, let
’
s wake her up.”
I smiled.
He grinned and immediately skipped off down
the hallway towards her bedroom. I followed behind him carrying the tray, eager
to see her again. I loved being able to do this for her.
I stood back and let him approach the bed,
smiling as he took her hand and bent over, leaning close to her face. She was
still sound asleep and looked beautiful with her hair all splayed over the
pillow.
~ Rosie ~
“Momma, wake up,” I heard DJ say as he
squeezed my hand.
Grinning, I wrapped my arms around him and
pulled him in the bed, yanking the duvet over our heads, making him giggle and
thrash around as I tickled him. “Morning, Baby.” I yawned as he hugged me back.
“I made you breakfast, Momma,” he chirped
happily.
I smiled.
“Yeah? What
did you make, pancakes and bacon?” I asked, playing along, holding my hand out
for the pretend food.
He laughed and pulled the cover off our
heads. “No, we made eggs and I mades the toast.”
My eyes flicked behind him and I jumped as
I saw someone standing in the doorway. My mouth popped open in shock. I
’
d forgotten that Nate had stayed last night. I
wasn
’
t used to waking up having
someone else in the apartment at all. He smiled, probably at my shocked face,
and I couldn
’
t help but smile
back. Of their own accord, my eyes wandered down his body. Just the way his
jeans hung so dangerously low, showing off all of the muscles to perfection,
made my mouth water and my hands itch to touch him. My gaze followed the line
of the V at his hips, seeing how it disappeared into the waistband.
I internally swooned. My whole body longed
for his. I hadn
’
t been with a guy
for so long, and Nate was fast turning me into some kind of sex depraved horny
monster. I was actually quite proud of the fact that I hadn
’
t given into my body
’
s urges and ravaged him until we both passed out through exhaustion
– well, that wasn
’
t strictly down
to me, to be fair. I couldn
’
t
really be proud of myself because it was more due to him rejecting me all the
time, rather than me being in control of myself!
“Hey.” He smirked at me as if he knew what
I was thinking. In all honesty, he probably
did
know, after all, I was
totally fucking him with my eyes and wasn
’
t even bothering to be discreet about it.
“Hey yourself.” I smiled trying to look
sexy, but in reality I probably looked terrible. I
’
d just woken up so my face was probably puffy, my hair a mess and I
had on no make-up, other than what was sure to be smudged, panda-style, under
my eyes. I winced, thinking about what my morning breath would smell like.
Nate nodded to my bedside table, and I
glanced over to see a tray there with a plate of scrambled eggs and toast on
it. My heart leapt into my throat. “You made breakfast?” I asked, shocked,
looking up at Nate. His hair looked messier than normal where he
’
d woken up and damn, did he look good in the
morning!
“
We
made breakfast,” he corrected,
nodding at DJ, who smiled proudly.
“Eat then, Momma,” DJ ordered, bouncing on
the bed happily. My heart was crashing in my chest as I pulled the tray onto my
lap. Nate had gotten out of bed with
my
son and made me breakfast? I
wasn
’
t sure how to cope with how
adorable that was, that was sweetness on a whole new level that I
’
d never encountered.
I scooped up some of the eggs and shoved
them in my mouth, trying to stop thinking. I was fast falling for him, but I
didn
’
t want to. I didn
’
t want to make myself vulnerable again.
Because he
would
get bored of me soon, either in a couple of weeks, or a
couple of months, I knew that. I wasn
’
t enough to hold a guy like him and keep him interested, and it
would only be a matter of time before he cottoned on to that fact. Nate deserved
a girl that could give him everything, drop everything for him, and let him be
her first priority. He would never be able to have that with me, there would
always be something there in the way.
“Mmm, these are really good, DJ. You make
these?” I asked with wide eyes, play acting a little. He nodded proudly, and
Nate laughed, sitting on the edge of the bed. Again, my eyes dropped to his
perfect chest, thinking how I would actually rather be eating him than the food
on the plate.
I smiled gratefully at Nate and beckoned
him closer to me with one finger. He grinned and leant in, pressing his lips
against mine for a second before pulling back and brushing my hair behind my
ear softly, his fingers leaving a burning trail across my cheek.
“
Thanks,
” I whispered. I didn
’
t
mean it just for the breakfast, I meant it for taking my son roller-skating and
spending time with him last night when he was obviously exhausted, for staying
here last night even though my son woke him up in the middle of the night, for
getting up with him in the morning and making me breakfast, and for letting me
sleep in.
“You
’
re welcome,
” he whispered, pressing his lips to
mine again softly.
He pulled back quickly when DJ moved up the
bed and sat himself in Nate
’
s lap.
I could barely breathe. I wanted DJ to have someone in his life, he deserved a
nice man in his life, because the one he had really didn
’
t take the job very seriously. Nate looked down at DJ, shock clear
across his face, before a smile pulled at the corners of his mouth, his eyes
soft and tender as he wrapped an arm around him, holding his hand out so DJ
could slap his hand. He pulled it away just as they were about to connect,
making DJ laugh and grip Nate
’
s
wrist so he could slap his palm.
“Five!” DJ shouted, laughing. Nate laughed
too, and they started fooling around trying to do high fives while the other
moved their hand at the last second, chanting rhymes while they played.
I just watched them feeling so happy it was
almost painful. They were both clearly enjoying the game. I loved the fact that
he paid DJ so much attention. He was a natural with him.
A wave of guilt suddenly washed over me, it
was like a slap in the face. I shouldn
’
t be allowing this; I should put a stop to this before things got
too far and DJ and I both got hurt. I was being irresponsible by letting
someone like Nate Peters into our lives. I wasn
’
t protecting my son
’
s
heart enough. Was it selfish of me to want to spend time with Nate, knowing
that there was a very, very good chance that he would leave me soon for someone
more deserving of his attention? I wanted him, but I knew that this would end
badly.
There were two sides to me, both of them
fighting hard against the other, and I wasn
’
t sure which one was going to win. One side wanted Nate so badly
that I would give anything for this to last forever; I would do anything for
it, say anything, be anything. But the other side was screaming at me that this
player was going to hurt me, and hurt me so badly that I would never recover
from it. He was such a great guy, but this wasn
’
t about him, it was about me.
I wanted him out of my life before the pain
came. But at the same time I knew I wasn
’
t strong enough to push this amazing guy away from me. Looking at
him now, playing with my son on a Saturday morning, I knew that there was no
way I was making him leave. I knew I was stuck here, just waiting for him to
rip my heart out. But there was that small part of me, the tiniest part that
Josh hadn
’
t destroyed, that tiny
part couldn
’
t help but think ‘what
if
’
. What if he didn
’
t hurt me? What if he really was as great as I
was thinking he was? Just,
what if
…
“
Momma doesn
’
t like our food,” Nate teased, poking DJ in
the ribs playfully.
I gulped, pulling myself from my thoughts.
“I do,” I lied, quickly shoving some more in my mouth, still watching them. My
eyes were prickling with tears and I willed myself not to cry all because the
most important thing in my life was hanging around my boyfriend
’
s neck, giggling hysterically.
“You two want some of this?” I asked,
nodding at my tray, feeling guilty that I was eating and they weren
’
t. DJ was probably starving, he always ate
early.
Nate shook his head. “We already ate a
couple of hours ago.”
I almost choked on my toast when I realised
he
’
d been up with DJ for a couple
of hours and had made him breakfast. He just got better and better.
“What time did you get up?” I asked,
swallowing quickly.
“Not sure. Long enough to watch
Mickey
Mouse
, eat Poptarts and then watch
Toy Story.
”
“A little while then,” I said
breathlessly.
Nate nodded, smiling. “Think I could grab a
shower?” he asked, looking at me hopefully.
“Sure, there are towels in the cabinet in
there.” I tried extremely hard not to think of the fact that he was about to
get naked in my apartment.
He smiled and lifted DJ off his lap,
setting him on the bed, ruffling up his hair before he leant in and kissed my
forehead. I closed my eyes at the feel of it, tilting my head up, wanting him
to move down to my lips, but he pulled back, and I felt the bed shift where he
got up. I smiled and watched his perfectly fine ass as he sauntered out of the
room.
I turned back to DJ. “You have a good time
with Nate?” I asked, finishing up my last piece of toast.
He grinned and nodded. “Nate said next time
he comes over I can put his handcuffs on.” He looked so excited that I couldn
’
t help but laugh.
“Wow, you
’
re lucky, DJ.” I couldn
’
t help but wonder whether Nate would let me put the handcuffs on
too.
“Think he
’
ll let me shoot his gun?” he asked with wide, excited eyes.
I laughed nervously and shook my head. “
I don’
t think so, Baby.”
He frowned dejectedly before he suddenly
brightened. “I
’
ll just wait until
I
’
m a cop and then I
’
ll have my own gun.”
“You want to be a cop now?” I asked,
rolling my eyes. His chosen profession usually changed about once a week. It
varied from builder, painter, doctor to chef; depending on what we were doing
at the time. He
’
d never said cop
before.
He pursed his lips and settled himself in
my bed. “Yeah, then me and Nate could arrest all the bad guys, and be partners
like Buzz and Woody.”
I draped my arm around his shoulder,
squeezing him to me tightly, praying that Nate wouldn
’
t break both of our hearts. I tried my hardest to hold on to those
two little words.
What if…
An hour later I was dressed and had
just finished packing up DJ’s overnight bag. Nate and DJ were stretched out on
the floor of the lounge, a big box of Lego tipped out all over the place as
they made some model together. DJ was watching Nate intently; he seemed to be
copying his every movement – if Nate crossed his ankles or scratched his head,
then DJ did it too. I was pretty sure Nate had no idea DJ was mimicking him.