Everything I want: Will Alfie and Lily's love survive?... (32 page)

“Tell me what’s been going on.” He sat quietly while I recounted the past couple of weeks with Alfie, my leaving to join Cobham Street, and Cody finding the pictures on the
blog.

Rick sat back in his chair and stared intensely at me. “I don’t think you have anything to worry about, honey.” I closed my eyes, not wanting him to see the hurt I was feeling. This was one notoriously sex driven rock star telling me that another rock star wasn’t playing away o
n me.

“Seriously, Lily, I’ve spoken to Alfie every day since you’ve been here. The guy is crazy about you.” Hearing Rick tell me this should have been music to my ears, but it only made me even angrier about Alfie’s beha
vior.

“You call him?” Rick smirked and took a swig of the Stella Attoire beer the waiter had set down for him. “The hell I do. He calls every afternoon, like he wants some kind of update on you. How you’re playing. How the boys in your band are treating you. Is anyone hitting on
you?”

He chuckled. “He always adds, ‘touch her and I’ll break your fucking legs…right after I cut your dick off’.’” He gave me a half smile, his eyes softening. “I think he’s pussy whipped. In fact, I keep listening to hear the crack of the whip, but then again, you’re here with me right now.” He laughed so
ftly.

Rick chuckled again. “Man that totally pisses him off.” I hugged my arms not sure what to think about what Rick was telling me. “He hasn’t called me since I left.” I bit my lip, worried just thinking about
that.

“Yeah, he can’t bring himself to call you, in case he comes after you. It would mean leaving his band in the lurch. To be honest Lily, I think y’all are as bad as one ano
ther.”

“What do you tell him about me when he asks, Rick?” He smiled and took another swig of his beer eyeing me appreciatively. “I tell him that you’re doing great, enjoying the buzz, and were born to do this.” I smiled at Rick, because he’d just given me the validation that I was looking for, he really did rate X
rAid.

Chapter 32
– Electricity

D
inner was really relaxing with Rick, and I thought he’d be a friend for life after spending time with him. He was really easy to talk to, and he paid me the biggest compliment I could ever have had when he told me that he knew I’d be special to him when he met me at th
e 02.

I couldn’t believe when he told me that one way or another, he knew I’d be in and out of his life from that point on. I never figured him for an old hippy, but he was changing my mind fast. He told me that from what he could see of Alfie, he’d never let m
e go.

When we were eating Rick told me I shouldn’t waste my time worrying about Alice, because she was batting for the other team, so any pictures I saw should be taken with a grain of
salt.

He reminded me of the quote, “There’s no such thing as bad publicity,” and suggested maybe we should mock-up some pictures of our own to keep the media chins wagging. I smiled but didn’t feel one hundred percent sure, because Alfie was just about sexy enough to turn someone stra
ight.

When Rick told me a few things about himself, I wasn’t surprised about how he had lived life to excess, after hearing some of the stories about his deprived upbringing in a poor area of New York
City.

Amazing he was so normal, really, considering the life he had come from, and his contrasting success as a super
star.

I was touched when he said, “I’d give anything to have what Alfie has with you, Lily, but the poor guy doesn’t know what to do with it. Equally, I don’t think you do either. Something’s got to give, though, because I don’t see either one of you giving yourselves to anyone else if it doesn’t get ironed
out.”

He smiled and leaned over, holding my hand across the table. A camera flash almost blinded us and a short, dark-haired, balding guy weaved his way out of the restaurant at high s
peed.

“Fucker.” Rick chuckled. “Sorry honey goes with the territory. Don’t worry, I’ll deal with Alfie. You never know, might do you two some
good.”

He noticed my worried look and took a deep breath “Listen, sweetheart, one of you will come to your senses over this. You’re not the first couple to both have successful careers. Most celebrity marriages never work out, but I have hope for you guys. I’d hate for you two to be casualties, because this fucked-up crazy life doesn’t last forever. It means having close relationships with people who love you becomes even more important when the ride s
tops.”

Understanding his stance I said, “I agree, but right now, we seem a million miles from that.” I dropped my head and stared at my lap. Rick put his index finger under my chin and lifted it so my eyes would meet
his.

“You just have to believe this is what you want, Lily. Anything’s possible. You just have to want it enough.” He smirked. “Or is it that you’re not sure that’s really what you want? Alfie, I
mean.”

I swallowed hard and met his gaze. “He’s everything I want, I just didn’t realize how much until he cut contact with me and let me go on my own last
week.”

Leaving the restaurant, all eyes were on us. I knew people reacted with curiosity. I probably would have too, if I were in their shoes. However, it would be nice sometimes, if guys like Rick and Alfie could just enjoy a quiet dinner now and again. Without having to smile, nod, and put on a show when someone spoke to them, because they didn’t want to offend their
fans.

More than once I’ve wanted to say, well he may be famous but I’d like to eat my dinner in peace if you don’t mind. If we are getting more recognizable I’m going to have to invest in wigs and glasses, because I valued time out on my own, now and a
gain.

The limo brought us back to our buses, and I declined Rick’s invite to go back to his band bus for drinks. I was living with enough smelly boys to want to go drinking with more of
them.

When I got inside, no one was home. Barry, one of the drivers, was the only one there. He told me the guys had gone to a club and offered to drop me off. Happy to have some quiet time, I declined. I showered and crawled into my bunk feeling better about Alfie after what Rick had said t
o me.

Sleeping, but vaguely aware of some very inebriated bandmates arriving home, I heard them cussing a storm as they tried to squeeze themselves into their b
unks.

There were more than a few thumps as they tried to undress in semi darkness, and several stage-loud “shushes,” something drunken people do when they were trying to be quiet. It brought a smile to my lips as I turned over, they had obviously sorted out their differences in my abs
ence.

Lennon was pinching my toe when I woke. “Lily, get your ass downstairs there’s something you might want to see.” I cricked my neck from one side to the other and tried to si
t up.

When I went into the kitchen area, Lennon and Digs were sitting at the table. Shawn and Cody were apparently the culprits of the drunken interlude last night and were still sleeping off the
ale.

““Well? What is it?” Lennon gestured at the internet sites. Pictures of Rick and me looking very cozy. The guy did a really good job. From the angle we were at, Rick looked completely smitten, and I was looking up at him with doe-
eyes.

“No publicity is bad publicity right?” I echoed Rick’s comment from last night looking confident, but inside I was worried about what Alfie would think when he saw it. This put my mind into conflict, because he obviously hadn’t given a shit about what I felt when he let Alice sit all over his lap, whether she was “batting for the other team,” or
not.

The tagline was what made me cringe though. ‘Alfie Black and Lily Parnell move on.’ The piece went on to ask some questions. “What exactly does Rick Fars have that Alfie Black doesn’t? Alice Bridge is a pretty girl, but is she in Lily’s le
ague?’

The article went on, {
The couple had chosen the discreet venue, but the eagle-eyed photographer captured the intimate image of the pair gazing longingly at each other. Rick and Lily were seen leaving the restaurant shortly after in the same luxury transport, and entering the band compound both Cobham Street and XrAid are currently sharing. We have to ask ourselves, what exactly was going through Alfie’s mind, when he saw the intimate pictures of the couple dining in an exclusive, romantic, discreet French restaurant. Alfie, allegedly, snatched the photographs out of the reporter’s hand and stared hard at them. He then slammed it back to the reporter’s chest with the comment, “Lily’s a big girl. She’s strong willed and independent, I’m not her ke
eper
.”}

Fuck.
That comment was almost as good a comment as, ‘she’ll fuck anything that isn’t moving.’ How dare he? After ignoring me for almost a week and flaunting a woman in his lap at me, even if she was
gay.

Suddenly my cell blew up. Text after text message, one from Elle, Jack, Will, Holly, and Mandy. Everybody wanted to know what the hell I was doing with
Rick.

Me
? What I was doing? There had been pictures all over the internet of Alfie and his “support act,” and yet everyone was questioning how I was behaving? Anyone would think I wasn’t able to be faithful to him. Well given my track record in the beginning, that might have been true, but technically we weren’t together
then.

“You know what, Lennon? Everyone can go to hell. I don’t care what the papers say, Rick and I know what happened, and if I tell you that was nothing, would you believe me an
yway?”

“Yes, without a doubt I do. I just wanted to see how you reacted and how we should play it off, is all,” he said qui
etly.

Just when I need someone to take this whole shitty mess out on, Lennon became the voice of reason. “I’m going to shower. Rick is probably over there rehearsing now. He said he would take care of it today. So, I’m not going to give it any more of my time. You know the press. They’re like sharks in the water, always circ
ling.”

I left the guys and collected my outfit and wash bag from the cubby above me and headed to the sh
ower.

When I was dressed, I grabbed my cell, and we all headed over to the stadium. Shit, this place was colossal, holding seventy thousand people, and we were completely unknown
here.

I swallowed but there wasn’t even enough spit in my mouth to warrant it. I glanced at the time on my phone before I put it in my pocket, and there it was. The long awaited text from Alfie, right on
cue.

SEXPERT: we need to
talk.

Now, I could have called him, and ranted on about the many texts and voicemails I had sent him that he’d ignored, but I didn’t. Quietly, I stood and punched out a short text and stuffed my cell back in my po
cket.

Pink Lady: We do? Since when? No, don’t answer that. I would only have to look at my cell again, and I’m too busy today. So…sav
e it.

Maybe I was being childish, but he’d left me for days without speaking to me. I couldn’t even get reassurance about the woman sitting on his lap. Well, fuck you Alfie, you can stew for a w
hile.

We rehearsed and rested then got ourselves ready for the show of our lives. Looking out at the vast crowd, I thought I was going to hyperventilate at the side of the stage as we waited to go on. This was the first gig we’d played at that was completely uncovered outside; including the stage, since we were at the On the Verge of Fame festival before we got si
gned.

It was a nighttime gig, and although there was some flood lighting in the stadium, by the time we were due to go on it was pitch b
lack.

Apart from the screams and catcalls, it felt quite eerie. I took my place on the stage after my usual pep talk from Cody. He’d kissed me on the lips tonight, right before he dragged me out here, but I put it down to the adrenaline and him not really thinking about it too
much.

We stood there anticipating the emcee’s announcement and when it came, there was a massive uproar from the crowd. Shawn counted us in like usual, and the next thing was Lennon‘s incredible guitar introduction bringing the stage to life. Cody began his usual showmanship banter, and myself and Digs joined in playing our instrum
ents.

I was playing rhythm guitar for this first number, and Cody sang this alone. We’d changed the set order to include a couple of covers for this gig, because of the number of people, and us being relatively unk
nown.

We were only finishing the first number when the skies opened and a heavy rainstorm beat down on us. An automatic cover was mechanically making its way over us, and we were instructed to keep pla
ying.

We managed another two numbers, but the canopy didn’t cover the stage completely. The stage was soaked in parts, and it was still raining hard. Cody signalled that we’d do one more number, and if it wasn’t getting any better, we’d
stop.

I had been singing with my electric acoustic guitar and was exchanging this for my Gibson. I slipped it over my shoulder, and Shawn counted us in for the next song. As soon as I strummed with my plectrum on the string, I vaguely heard a loud
bang.

There was a sharp, intense pain that shot up my arm, and it seemed to squeeze my chest, but it felt like a punch there as well. My mouth tingled and everything went b
lack.

The first thing I remembered after that was hearing voices echoing the distance, and I was wondering who it was. People were talking in low murmurs. I strained to listen, but I couldn’t make out what they were saying. I felt exhausted. My eyes were so heavy, and I was in pain. I just couldn’t pinpoint where. My head hurt as well, that was where the sharp pain was. It was the body pain I was struggling with loca
ting.

I tried to open my eyes but I was so tired, and the tiredness was pulling me further back, until I couldn’t hear anything, and it went black again. I kept slipping in and out of conscious
ness.

The next time I was conscious I heard, “It’s your own fucking fault dude. You think you can mess with someone like her?” I heard the voices again. I knew the voice but couldn’t place it. I couldn’t understand why I was so tired? The voices faded a
gain.

Again, I became aware of someone. “I couldn’t deal with her being with you guys, and not me, it fucking hurt.” I remembered thinking, whose voice was that? Oh, God, it was A
lfie?

“Of course I love her. She’s my fucking world, Rick.” I kept thinking, Alfie’s here? What was he doing here? Who did he love? I still couldn’t understand why I couldn’t open my eyes or where I
was.

Alfie took my left hand. I knew it was him. I would know his hands anywhere, and there was a slight ‘hum’ of electricity between our palms. “I love you, honey. I’m sorry, shit we’ve wasted so much time, please wake up.” He was talking to me. I felt him drop my hand back to soft material. I realized I was in a bed. What happ
ened?