Expecting the Rancher's Child (Callahan's Clan) (10 page)

His kiss drove all her worries away. She was swept up in desire, wanting to hold and kiss him, feeling as if this might be the last time. Even so, she knew she couldn’t hold in the news any longer.

In minutes she leaned away to look up at him. “Blake, wait a moment. We should talk.”

“There isn’t anything as important as kissing you,” he whispered, brushing her lips with his. She pushed against his shoulders lightly and stepped out of his embrace.

“There is something as important,” she said. He stared at her a moment and nodded, and she knew she had his attention.

She had put off telling him as long as she could. Standing by the window as the sun slipped below the horizon, she faced him. He sat in a leather chair, his booted feet on an ottoman as he looked at her. “Something’s worrying you. What is it? Can I help?”

“You can help,” she said quietly. “Listen to me, be patient and let’s try to cooperate.”

She saw the flicker in his eyes and knew he realized he was somehow involved in whatever worried her.

“I don’t know how to tell you except to just say it—Blake, I’m pregnant, and it’s your baby.”

SEVEN

B
lake felt as if he’d had the breath knocked from him. Dazed, he stared at her. “I’m going to be a dad,” he said. He hadn’t meant to say it out loud.

“Yes, you are. We have a long time to sort things out and decide what we’ll do, so all you need to do right now is get used to the idea. It’s a big, unexpected shock,” she said, sitting quietly and letting him think.

“I used a condom every time,” he said, more to himself than to her. He had gotten Sierra pregnant. They would be tied together for the next eighteen years. They would never view life the same way, but he was certain she wouldn’t want to marry him any more than he wanted to marry her.

But how else would he be the kind of father his own never was?

He raked his fingers through his hair and stood, going to the kitchen and getting a beer, more to move around than to have something to drink. He walked to a window to gaze outside. The daylight was growing dim and night was creeping in, changing the landscape.

He knew he would never forget this moment. He was going to be a father. The idea shook him. He had dimly thought that someday he would marry, someday he would have a family, but it was in the distant future, a fuzzy prospect that had held no reality for him until now.

He was going to have a baby. When he glanced at her, Sierra sat looking at her fingernails, remaining quiet while he absorbed the news.

He was thankful for that. Thankful she wasn’t in tears or yelling at him or asking him what they would do. He focused more on her and wondered what she thought. She had already known about this. She looked calm, poised, and she had obviously adjusted to the idea. He thought of her big family and knew she would have their support. Blake realized if he walked away now, her family would be there for her.

Not that he intended to walk away or abandon her. He thought about his father. He would never be a father like the one he’d had. He wouldn’t abandon or reject his own child, not ever. There was one way to put himself in his child’s life forever—marry Sierra. That seemed to be the only solution to being a real dad to his child.

Blake’s gaze shifted back to Sierra who looked up, giving him a level stare.

He crossed the room to face her. “You caught me by surprise.”

“I knew I would. There was no way to avoid that.”

“You’re very calm about this,” he said, looking into wide blue eyes, and he realized she had passed the point of shock and was thinking calmly about the situation.

“It won’t help to get hysterical,” she said.

“Damn straight on that. I’m thankful you’re not.”

“We’ll have to make decisions and work things out, but we don’t have to do anything right now except adjust to the idea. I think we should take a little time before we start trying to figure out what we’ll do.”

“It all looks simple to me.”

“Blake,” she interrupted, shaking her head. “Don’t propose.”

“I don’t see why not,” he said, startled that she wouldn’t even discuss marriage. “You know your family will want us to marry.”

“None of them will if they know I don’t want to. You and I are opposites. I don’t like your work, and you don’t like mine.”

“That’s nine to five, and we can get around that,” he said, surprised she let their jobs be the reason for rejecting what would be best for their child. “Our jobs will have little to do with life at home,” he said.

“For us and our chosen fields, it has everything to do with life at home. I may want to foster kids or find homes for more dogs. We’ll work something out, I’m sure, because we’re both willing, but it isn’t going to be marriage.”

Shocked, because she seemed so firm in her refusal, he stared at her. “I want to be part of my child’s life,” he said, trying to hang on to his temper.

“You will be. I promise. I want you to be. But that doesn’t mean we have to be married.”

“Damn, Sierra.” Once the idea had presented itself, it hadn’t occurred to him that she would reject his proposal, at least not under the circumstances. She sat calmly facing him, her long legs crossed at the ankles and her hands in her lap. She looked composed and determined. He suspected he was going to find out how strong-willed she could be.

“You don’t want to marry. You made that clear,” she added.

“My life has changed since I said that. I was single and not expecting to become a father. I want to know my baby, to be with him or her every day I’m not away for work. There is no way I’m going to be the father that mine was and abandon my child. I can promise you that,” he said, determined that he would not let her stop him from being the father his child needed. “I want to take care of both of you. The easiest way to do that is if we marry. If we try, we can make marriage work.”

“This is a knee-jerk reaction, Blake. We don’t have to decide today, this week or this month, so let’s consider the possibilities. I know you want to be a dad to your child, and I want that. I want to be a mom to our child. We don’t have to marry to be parents, or even to be good parents.”

“You’re not being sensible,” he said, his gaze running over her.

“I’m not being sensible?” she snapped, her eyes narrowing. “I’m the one being the most sensible. We’re opposites, Blake. Marriage won’t work. We’re not in love.”

“Marriage can be a partnership. It’s something we can work at. We can get along. If we share a child, we can probably get along even better than now.”

“I can’t believe you’re saying that,” she said. “You’ve dedicated your life to increasing your fortune because you want to get back at your father. You’re concentrating on competing with him just to ruin his business. That’s revenge.

“Revenge drives you, Blake. Not love. Meanwhile, I’m trying to save people. I’m not marrying someone who is driven by revenge for childhood hurts. I’m sorry for what you went through, but there’s a better way.”

“That may seem foolish to you because you had an abundance of love and attention, but having a father abandon you hurts, Sierra, and it’s the kind of hurt you never forget. It’s not a silly childhood notion.”

“I know that, but you’re grown now. Move on and do some good in the world,” she said.

“I believe you have a very sizable check from me that will do some good. Don’t forget that,” he said.

She was being stubborn. They had a fabulous relationship, and if she would give it a chance, they could work out something that would give their baby both a mom and a dad.

“I only have that check because it was a bribe. You wanted me for this job, and you wanted me in your bed. You said you were attracted to me, and you wanted to see me again.”

“Yeah, I did. And you acted glad to take both checks I gave you, and glad to be in my bed,” he said.

Her cheeks grew red, and he suspected she was trying to hold her temper just as he was. She stood and clenched her fists. “I think we should call it a night and cool down. I have a lot to do tomorrow, and you’re leaving town. We can talk later, when you’ve had time to think about this.”

“I’ll think about it constantly, and I imagine you will, too. You might give some more thought to my proposal before you turn it down. Try to think of the baby—you shouldn’t turn down my proposal just because you don’t want to marry me. You’re not allowing our child to have both a father and a mother full-time, in a home we all share. And think of what I can provide, including my name. Marriage will make raising our child more convenient, more workable. Think about the baby you’re carrying before you reject my proposal.”

“I’ll do that, Blake. I
have
done that. There is nothing about a loveless marriage that would be good for our child! Look at us now—you think this would be good for a child to be part of our squabbling? I don’t think so.” She took a deep breath. “I think we’ve talked enough tonight. I’m going to my suite before we say something one of us will really regret.”

She brushed past him and hurried into the hall. Her back tingled because she felt his gaze on her as she left the room.

Anger and hurt filled her. Why had she ever been so wildly attracted to Blake? Worse, why had she succumbed to his kisses and then to his lovemaking?

Now there would be no way to forget him. She was tied to him for the rest of her life. Her anger grew. She had tried to be calm and reasonable with him. She had expected him to propose and to insist on her accepting. She had no intention of marrying a man who was building a hotel chain with the sole purpose of getting back at his father. In the privacy of her bedroom she paced the floor, not only angry at herself but that Blake wouldn’t stop and think before he started pushing for marriage. Yes, that had been her first thought, too, but if he would give the future some thought, she expected he would come to the same conclusion she had—they were not compatible out of bed, and they shouldn’t be married.

By one in the morning, she had given up on getting to sleep. She was exhausted and yet still angry when she thought about Blake’s stubborn insistence on marriage before he had really had time to think things through.

It was almost dawn when she fell asleep, and then she overslept. As she showered and dressed in green slacks and a matching cotton blouse, she hoped Blake had already left the ranch.

She soon found out from Etta that Blake had left for Dallas, and she didn’t know when he would return. Trying to concentrate on the tasks at hand and put him out of her thoughts, Sierra went to work. The sooner she could get his new wing finished, the sooner she could return to Kansas City.

As she sat at a desk with sketches before her, she paused, staring into space, remembering being in Blake’s arms, the laughter they had shared. They had liked being together—it almost made her wish they
could
make a marriage work—but there was no way she could get past his efforts to get revenge. That was a solid wall that would always divide them.

In spite of all common sense and absolute certainty that marriage to Blake would be a disaster, she couldn’t keep from thinking about him. He had a forceful personality, and the attraction between them, the electrifying appeal that made him unique, was irresistible. He could certainly turn on the charm, and they’d had a good time together.

With a sigh, she focused on the tasks for the day to try to move on.

Within the hour, she was lost in thoughts about Blake again. Common sense said she would get over missing him. That it was just a matter of time. Her heart was trying to tell her differently.

As the morning progressed, she kept busy, supervising placement of the new furniture and area rugs, the installation of the mirrors and new paintings. Blake was in California, and she talked to him briefly on the phone at night because of questions about the house. Each time she heard his voice, she felt a pang of longing that she tried to ignore. They were cool with each other, remote, as if there had never been intimacy between them, and she suspected when the calls about the house ended, she wouldn’t have any contact with him for a while.

Finally, they were finished. Blake was due back on Friday, and Saturday morning she, as well as Eli, Lucinda and the contractor, were going to meet with him to go over the rooms. She was certain any party Blake had planned earlier wasn’t going to happen now.

While it wasn’t convenient to move her things, she didn’t want to stay on the ranch with him after the work was done, so she stayed in the small hotel in town. In her hotel room, she looked intently at herself in the mirror.

At two months her stomach was still flat and her waist had not changed plus her five-ten height might be the reason she didn’t see any change. So far, she felt well and had not had any morning sickness.

She had rented a car to drive to the ranch tomorrow. She didn’t want to rely on Blake for anything—not transportation, food, lodging, companionship. Her anger with him was a constant feeling. She was certain he had not changed his mind in the least, and he would continue to insist they marry for all the wrong reasons.

It was simply something she would not do.

* * *

Friday afternoon in Dallas, Blake met Cade for lunch, sliding into a chair opposite his brother.

“Well, is the house finished?”

“Yes, and it looks great. I’ll have a party and you can come see. I was going to have a big party soon—you and the rest of the brothers, if Nathan and family are back, Sierra and her family, friends. I’ll have it, but it may be postponed for a time.”

“Are you leaving town?”

“Yes, but that isn’t why. The job is over, and I don’t know how much I’ll see of Sierra.”

Cade tilted his head. “Are you two dating each other?”

“Yes and no,” Blake said. “Yes, we were, but no, we’re not currently. But we’ll see each other some. We have some problems to work out.”

“House problems?”

Blake gazed at his half brother. He felt closer to Cade than anyone else he knew. He had to share his news. “Okay, this isn’t for public announcement, but maybe—oh, hell. She’s pregnant with my baby.”

“Kaboom,” Cade said, his eyes opening wide with a startled expression on his face. “Wow. Congratulations, I think. You don’t sound like a happy dad. I know you didn’t plan to marry this soon, but you said you expected to get hitched sometime. Just move it up.”

“That’s not the problem. The lady said no. We’re opposites in so many ways, and she doesn’t think we can ever truly make it work or fall in love. Her parents have this perfect union of like-minded individuals, and that’s what she wants. Plus, she is Miss Do-Good and wants me to be the same.”

Cade sputtered and tried to bite back a smile. “Sorry. You’re a nice guy, but not out to save the world.”

“No, I’m not, but I’m not an ogre. It’s this deal about my hotels and our dad that gets her.”

“Ah, the light dawns. She doesn’t know our dad. He’s no saint. His people will just dump the hotels and go on to something else, and he may never even know you were behind the loss in revenue.”

“Yeah, that’s what I’m starting to realize.”

“If she won’t marry, maybe you’re better off. Look at our dad and all his marriages—all disasters. Sierra’s folks are an exception. You may be fortunate she turned you down. She’s not going to try to keep you from your baby, is she?”