Fake (14 page)

Little Bitty Test

GAIA FELT A TUG AS SHE WATCHED
Jake lope dejectedly into the night. Was it remorse? No. She was way too angry for that. It was more like . . . a shallow grief. Like the nostalgia one got tossing out a favorite pair of jeans: lots of
good times, could have been more, but there were way too many rips to be mended.

Served him right,
she told herself, turning away from the sill. She'd been out of her mind with anger. She probably shouldn't have lied about going to prom with Skyler, but she couldn't stand to hear the crazy things Jake was saying about him.

Skyler had been so right. The guy was just a macho thrill seeker. Only a true sicko would jump out of a dark corner like that, trying to freak her out.

Yet . . . A sudden realization swept over her, like an overly aggressive heat rash. . . .
She hadn't been scared at all.
She'd come home to find someone lurking in her room and hadn't been the least bit afraid!

Gaia slowly replayed the episode in her mind. It was true. She'd been angry with him for using such a stupid, Loki-like tactic. And she was still sore at him for not calling the past couple of days. But there wasn't the slightest hint of fear. Not a single skipped heartbeat.

“Wait a minute,” she whispered, grabbing ahold of the bedpost. “It's been longer than that.”

Closing her eyes, she mentally skimmed over the events of the day. The subway doors catching her arm had been frustrating, but it hadn't made her pulse race. And when the cab careened around the corner, Skyler assumed he'd saved her in the nick of time. But really, it was her own quick reaction that made her
sidestep the car—Skyler only yanked her out of the way a second
after
she'd avoided getting hit. If she'd been frozen by fear, she would have been run over for sure. Come to think of it, she hadn't experienced a trace of fear all day.

What happened to my fear?
she wondered.
Is it fading? Is it gone?

There was one way to know for sure. Gaia grabbed a jacket off her desk chair and quickly pulled it on.

Wait, no.
She paused in the middle of zipping up. This was stupid. She could be making a huge, dangerous mistake.

But then, she had to know, didn't she? She owed it to herself to find out what was happening to her.

Okay. She'd do it. She headed over to her open window and swung her legs over the sill.

She'd just check it out for a while. Nothing crazy. Just a little bitty test.

From:
[email protected]

To:
[email protected]

Re:
promstuff

Hey! I heard you asked Kai to prom. You guys are too, too cute! Looks like everyone is paired up. Well,
almost
everyone. I guess you heard what Gaia did to poor Jake. What a shock, huh? You were smart to break up with her when you did. I would hate to think of her doing something like that to you.

From:
[email protected]

To:
[email protected]

Re:
Warning

Hey, girl! How are you?

Just wanted to keep you up to date on what's been going on here . . . Listen, I know I know she's your friend and all and that you guys have been keeping in touch while you've been away, but you need to hear what sort of things Gaia is up to. I know it's probably none of my business, but I'm only concerned about you.

Gaia is up to her wicked, wicked ways again. She totally cheated on Jake with Skyler Rodke. I'm serious. The girl obviously has a major ego problem when it comes to men.

I'm only telling you this for your own good. She has major loyalty issues—if she can't stay true to her boyfriends, then she probably can't stay true to her girlfriends, either.

From:
[email protected]

To:
[email protected]

Re:
Moving on

Hey. I just wanted to say that I'm sooo sorry about what Gaia did to you. None of us can believe she would stoop this low. You deserve better and you know it.

So have you ever considered asking Laura out?

This was what she was meant to do. She knew it with every hormonally charged molecule in her being.

Technicolor Fantasies

ED SAT AT HIS DESK, FROWNING AT
his computer screen as if challenging it to a duel. Since when did Megan send him e-mails? And what did she mean about Gaia doing something to Jake?

What could she have done? Did this mean they weren't together anymore?

He shook his head, trying to dislodge the thought. It was none of his business, really. He should recognize it for what it was: the conniving gossip that fueled the FOHs. Nothing more. Yet he just couldn't stop these silly, Technicolor fantasies from rolling through his mind: Gaia beating Jake to a pulp, Gaia suspending him by his Calvin Klein underwear from the school's flagpole, Gaia renouncing him publicly as the most boring mammal on the planet.

Ed really had nothing against Jake. Jake was . . . Jake. He was a decent enough guy. Sure, he looked like he'd just breezed off the set of
The OC
, but he wasn't the ego on legs one would expect. And he did seem to treat Gaia well. Ed couldn't hate him. But he didn't have to like the guy either, right? He didn't wish anything horrible on him—nothing beyond a bad case of acne or a sudden relocation to Addis Ababa—but he was also not going to be Jake Montone's friend, ally, or fan.

Which brought him back to that pesky question at hand:
What the hell did Gaia do to Jake?

The phone rang. Ed quickly snatched it up, grateful for the opportunity to concentrate on something else. “Ed's room. Ed speaking.”

“Hey. How's the convalescing?”

Ed smiled. There was no mistaking Kai's peppy, staccato inflections. “I am so convalesced. Convalesced is I. Any more soup or bed rest and I'll become superhuman. Which is why I'm going to school tomorrow.”

Kai gasped slightly. “Really? Ed, that's excellent! I wish I could be there.”

“What? You aren't going to school?” Ed asked, feeling genuinely disappointed.

“No. Remember? Mom's taking me to check out Hartford College. You know, that all-women's school? There's no way in hell I'll choose that place, but hey, if it means missing calculus, I'll play along.”

“I totally understand. Still, you will be missed.” Ed sighed. Something told him he might be needing Kai tomorrow. As a friend or maybe a diversion. Kai was one of the few happy, low-stress, low-maintenance things in his life at the moment.

“Aw, that's sweet,” Kai murmured. “You know, I'll be thinking of you, too. There're some swanky dress shops in Hartford Mom knows about. I'm going to see what they have in the way of prom wear. How are you doing finding a tux? Did you check out those web sites yet?”

“Yep. Only they weren't much help. Single-breasted versus double-breasted? Ascots versus bow ties? Vests versus cummerbunds? There's more to this tuxedo-renting situation than I previously thought. Yet they all look pretty much the same. What is it, exactly, that distinguishes one black tuxedo from another? Their vintage? Their inner personality?”

“Poor thing,” she teased. “You really are lost, aren't you?”

“It's okay. I'm actually thinking about starting my own brand of tux. Something a little less confining. Baggier pants—maybe with a drawstring, even. Matching knit cap. Think of it as skater boi formal wear.”

“Go ahead,” she said, laughing. “And you can fashion yourself a new date while you're at it.”

“Are you kidding me? I'm the perfect date. In fact, I just got an e-mail from Megan Stein about how cool it is you and I going together.”

“Really?” Kai sounded suspicious. “I'm surprised she was even interested. Was that all she wanted?”

“Sort of. She also wanted to fill me in on the latest gossip. Something vague about Gaia doing something to Jake.” He tried to sound offhand, but for some reason, his voice grew stronger, with an added note of urgency.

There was a slight pause. Then Ed heard the staticky sound of Kai sighing into the receiver. “Yeah. That,” she said.

“Do you know what she's talking about?” he asked, casting aside all pretense of indifference.

“Yeah,” Kai replied haltingly. “I think so.”

“Well . . . ?” Ed clenched his fist around the receiver, trying not to sound irritated. “What did you hear?”

“I ran into Amy van Cline at Starbucks and she said Tammie Deegan had just been in, telling everyone how Gaia cheated on Jake with Skyler Rodke.”

“
What
? No way!”

“Hey, I'm just saying what she told me.” He could hear it now. There was clearly a hurt tone behind Kai's voice.

“I'm sorry. It's just that it's too weird. Gaia would never do a thing like that.”

But even as he said it, a back compartment of his brain was spinning up a whole new line of thought Why was he so sure Gaia wouldn't cheat? He'd certainly seemed to think she was capable of it when they were dating and she was getting chummy with Sam Moon again. Of course . . . she never did get back together with Sam, like he'd assumed she would. But
Skyler Rodke?
The guy probably had regular facials, for chrissake. How could Gaia be with a guy who probably had five different types of hair gel in his bathroom cabinet?

Besides, the Gaia he'd come to know—as friend, confidant, and soul mate—just wasn't capable of that sort of deception. In fact, the only times he'd known her to be devious, she'd either been in danger or protecting someone. So could this mean she was in trouble? She had been acting really strange lately. Crying, obsessing over non-Gaia things like prom and fashion. What did it all mean?

“I'm sure it's no big deal.”

“Huh?” Was that Kai? Oh, yeah. He was talking with Kai. “Sorry. Didn't mean to spaz. I just hate gossip. It's so . . . high school.”

“Right.” Kai's pitch had fallen several notes. “Well, listen. I really should go. Good luck with tomorrow and your big comeback.”

“Thanks. Have fun on your trip. Call me when you get back.”

“I will,” she replied, rather unenthusiastically. “Bye.”

Brilliant going, Fargo,
he scolded himself as he hung up the phone. Kai was so great, so easygoing, so undeserving of him. And if he wasn't careful, he was going to completely ruin things with her over this relentless obsession with All Things Gaia.

Which reminded him . . . what the hell was going on between her and Skyler?

Tightly Focused Hatred

GAIA STOOD ON THE LAWN JUST
below her window, gauging her fear. So far there was none. In fact, she felt great It was nice to slink out of that depressing little hovel for a while (thank you, Jake, for revealing this nifty little escape hatch).

A cool breeze wafted over her, tickling her cheeks with the loose wisps of hair around her face. She could smell the breath of the city—salty sea air spiked with gasoline and just a hint of East River sludge. It invigorated her, beckoned to her, calling her forth into the heart of the city.

She decided to walk down the street. After all, standing in the yard wasn't a true test of her panic. Other than Suko or a wayward rat, she wouldn't really find much to fear.

Careful to stay in the shadows, she stole across the lawn and turned onto the sidewalk. Gaia felt an exhilarating rush of freedom. She'd forgotten how in sync she was with the nighttime. Her senses sharpened and her body felt revved. Even her mind seemed squeegeed of the day's emotional residue. She should have been a cat. Or a nighthawk. Some creature no one would ever force into the sun.

Gaia passed by the shuttered shops and sleeping apartment buildings. Couples walked past hand in hand, probably on their way from the theater. A group of noisy men dressed in athletic gear spilled out of a nearby bar and started hailing a cab. She even had to veer around a pair of winos stumbling crookedly down the sidewalk, their bottles, swaddled in brown paper bags, clutched tightly to their chests.

At the other end of the block she paused, checking for fear. But she felt no trepidation whatsoever. In fact,
she felt completely at ease, primed for action. Even—dare she say it?—content.

Okay. Maybe she should go just a little farther.

It was time for the ultimate test. Washington Square Park was just a few minutes away. At this hour it would be full of all sorts of things a normal person would find frightening. Just one stroll through the darkest path and she'd know beyond a doubt whether there was any fear left in her system at all.

Soon Gaia saw the familiar arch in the distance. She quickened her pace, her feet knowing instinctively which path to take. It was as if she were coming home from a long voyage, a probe returning to its mother ship.

And there was still no fear.

Instead her body buzzed with expectation—the familiar thrill she always got when bubbly adrenaline coursed through her veins, topping off her power supply. She hurried past the chess tables, through a grove of trees, and into the park's dark, chewy center.

She knew what she wanted—what she almost
needed
to find. The park had never let her down before, and she hoped it wouldn't fail her now.

It didn't. As Gaia made her way past a circle of park benches, she saw a group of people huddled in the trees beyond. It was her old buddies, the Droogs. There were five of them standing menacingly around a pair of twenty-something-year-old girls, circling and
cackling like a pack of half-starved hyenas.

“Hey, there,” she called out, advancing toward them without hesitation. “Yoo-hoo. I'm ho-o-ome.”

This was so worth it, if only to see the confused looks on their crazed chimpanzee faces. After gaping at her, then at each other, they turned away from the scared, shaking girls and ambled toward Gaia.