Falling for June: A Novel (26 page)

“Now I have some things for you to sign, Elliot,” he said, pulling out several documents and handing them to me.

There was an article making me the trustee of Mr. Hadley’s living trust, and another making me an officer and stockholder in the Echo Glen Corporation.

“Don’t get too excited,” he said. “There’s no real money in the company or the trust. You won’t get business cards either. This is the entity that will own the private cemetery. It’s just a formality. A bothersome bit of red tape that will allow you to file for the cemetery license after I’m gone.”

I don’t know why I hesitated, but I did. Seeing my name on official documents made me nervous. Not because of the responsibility so much—I’d handled similar arrangements when my father had passed—but because it implied that Mr. Hadley would not be around to fill the role himself.

“I still plan to pay you that twenty-five thousand I offered you from my life insurance,” he said, apparently sensing my hesitation. “No one should do anything for free.”

I shook my head. “I’m not taking your money, Mr. Hadley. I’m happy to do it.” I picked up the pen, filled in my address, dated the documents, and signed them. “There,” I said, passing them back, “now I’m the proud owner of a cemetery.”

I glanced over at Estrella and she smiled.

Mr. Hadley put the forms back in the binder.

“The rest of this in here is stuff you might need after I’m gone,” he said, patting the binder in his lap. Then he paused, looking at Estrella. “Is this okay to discuss?” he asked.

“Go ahead,” she said. “It’s fine with me.”

He carried on: “My birth certificate. My will. Insurance policy information. There are bank statements, as sad as they
are. And there’s contact information for the home burial people who will prepare my body here at the house. I put Mr. Thorpe’s son’s contact info in the back. He’ll dig the grave. Make sure he doesn’t try to bring that digger up there and ruin the whole hill. He’s lazier than his dad was but he’s a good man. Just ask him to dig it by hand.”

It seemed strange to hear him talk about having his own grave dug, but if it was at all strange to him he didn’t let on.

“That should be everything,” he said. “Everything except the death certificate.” Then he turned to Estrella. “I used to be an accountant, you know.”

She smiled. “Yes, Elliot told me.”

“I do have one question,” I said. “Let’s say thirty years from now I pass away—”

“Thirty years?” he asked, cutting me off. “More like ninety years the way medical science is moving.”

“Okay, sure. But in however many years, when I pass, who will be responsible for the cemetery?”

“Be a fun project maybe for your grandkids,” he answered.

“What if I don’t have any kids?”

“You’ll have kids,” he said. “I can tell.”

“You can?”

“Well, no. But I can tell you’d be a good dad.”

“Really? I’ve never thought about it.”

“Most men don’t until it happens,” he said. “But yes, you would. Don’t you think so, Estrella?”

She nodded. “He’d make a great dad.”

“You’re lucky I’m a married man, Elliot, or I might just try to steal this one away from you. She’s a keeper.” He closed the binder in his lap. “But there’s nothing to worry about with the cemetery. June and I will be pushing up grass on the hill, blanketed in waterfall mist and fallen leaves. Forgotten to the world, as it should be. This is all just a formality to get
them to issue a license, and then you can forget about us and let us be.”

We all sat quiet for a minute, the weight of what we had just been discussing settling in. I could hear the cat clock ticking on the wall. It was past noon already.

“You know what I would love?” Estrella said. “A chance to see Echo Glen. Elliot showed me the painting you gave him and it looks so beautiful.”

“That’s a great idea,” Mr. Hadley said. Then he turned to me. “Would you mind taking her, Elliot? I’ve already been. And besides, I could use the time to make us all some lunch.”

I knew it had sapped a lot out of him to go through the photo album and the documents, and I’m sure he had been worn out even before we started after showing us around the house. But I think he mostly didn’t want Estrella to see him struggling up the path with his cane. He was a sweet man, but he was a proud man too.

“I’d be happy to walk her up and show her,” I said. “But I thought maybe we’d all go out to lunch. I can drive us. There’s a great little diner I passed by just in Darrington.”

He looked surprised at my suggestion, and I thought for sure he would turn it down. But he nodded.

“That’s Clancy’s old place, before he passed on and his lazy kids sold it off to some clown. I’ve not been, but I doubt they have anything nearly as good as a Hungry-Man Salisbury steak dinner with home-style mushroom and onion gravy. But I’ll go along if that’s what you two want.”

“How about you, Estrella? Diner or Hungry-Man?”

“Hmm . . . ,” she said, thinking. “I kind of feel like pie.”

Mr. Hadley raised an eyebrow. “The Hungry-Man includes a chocolate brownie.”

“As tempting as it is,” she said, “I vote for the diner.”

He nodded, accepting his defeat. Then he plucked up his
energy and rose from the couch to return the photo album and the binder to his room.

“You kids have fun. I’ll be waiting when you get back.”

It was the first time we’d held hands, although I’m not sure which of us made the move. It just seemed like halfway up the path our hands kind of came together. The wind had died down and the sun was peeking through the trees. It felt nice, even though it was a chilly fall day.

“I really like Mr. Hadley,” Estrella said.

“Yeah, I could tell. It’s pretty clear he really likes you too. And you know what, so do I.”

“Uh-oh,” she said. “Is that why you just let go of my hand? Because you only date girls you don’t like, remember?”

“No, I let go of your hand so I could get a head start.”

“A head start on what?”

“On racing you the rest of the way.”

I took off running ahead of her up the path.

“Hey!” I heard her call from behind me, closing in. “That’s not fair. You cheated.”

She was faster than me and had passed me by before we gained the bend that turned in to Echo Glen. When I arrived she was standing there looking up at the waterfall.

“It’s so beautiful,” she said breathlessly. “I can see why a person would want to spend forever here.”

“Come on, I’ll show you where June’s buried.”

We climbed the low hill to the oak tree and stood looking down at the headstone together. Estrella read it out loud.

“ ‘Just beyond the second star to the right and straight on till morning.’ It’s from
Peter Pan
, isn’t it?”

I nodded. “I’m not surprised it was her favorite story. She kind of reminds me of Peter Pan a little. I wish she were still
around to sprinkle some of her fairy dust on us. Wouldn’t it be fun to fly the way she did?”

“Well, let’s hope she’s in Neverland never growing old.”

I pointed to the space beside the stone. “I guess that’s where Mr. Hadley will be buried. It’s strange to think about, isn’t it? That he’s here now, but soon he’ll be down there. It seems cold and lonely and impossibly horrible.”

“Oh, I don’t know,” she said. “Maybe you’re looking at it wrong. It looked to me like they had great love and a great life, and that’s more than most people ever have. Besides, I’ll bet it’s nice here when the sun comes out and warms the grass.”

“Maybe,” I said. “But I still plan to talk him into waiting. I met with a real estate attorney and she thinks it might be possible to force the bank to accept a deed-for-lease situation, as long as he can make the original mortgage payment. That way he can stay as long as he needs.”

“But I thought he couldn’t afford the payment.”

“He can’t. But I can. At least long enough to give him some time. I’ve been saving for awhile.”

“Yeah, but that’s for your condo, right?”

I shrugged. “Miami isn’t going anywhere.”

Estrella put her arm around my waist and leaned into me. We stood that way watching the waterfall together.

“You know what, Elliot,” she said, “you’re a good man.”

“Yeah, everyone keeps telling me that.”

I didn’t mention that this whole situation had made me question the kind of man I really was. I’m not so sure a good man would go around earning his living by offering financially strapped people cash for their house keys.

We broke off the main path on our way back and hiked up to the bluff where June had taken David to go hang gliding into the moon. It was really high with a really amazing view. You could just see the house at the edge of the tree line, a spire of
white smoke standing like a feather from its chimney, and you could see the fields and barns beyond.

I could almost picture it as Mr. Hadley had described it being that night, with a big swollen moon and Sebastian down there somewhere standing beside his crazy bonfire. If he hadn’t told me the story, who would be left to remember? Does it even matter? Does there need to be a photograph or a record for a thing to have happened? I thought about all the quiet, undocumented moments that must flare and fade forever from the face of humankind’s vast experience. Moments made even more special because they belonged to only those who had experienced them. Moments like this one for me.

I put my arm around Estrella and pulled her into me. She felt warm in the cool air of the high cliff. She rested her head on my shoulder, and I smelled her lavender shampoo, smiling to think that she used the same scent as June.

“Would you ever go hang gliding?” I asked her.

“I don’t know,” she said. “I suppose I would if I trusted the person I was getting into the harness with.”

“Yeah, me too.”

We stood for another few minutes, taking in the view.

“We better get back and wake him up,” I said. “I’d bet the lunch check he’s nodded off in front of the TV.”

34

H
E WAS WAITING
for us with his coat on and his hair combed when we returned. He almost seemed like a nervous kid heading off to school. He had surrendered his pride, though, and he used his cane as we walked together out to my car. He tried to sit in the back but Estrella insisted he take the front passenger seat instead.

“I haven’t been out to a restaurant in years,” he confessed once we were buckled in. “Well, unless you count the hospital cafeteria.”

It was fun driving with all three of us in the car. It felt like a family outing. Estrella and Mr. Hadley challenged each other to name the various types of trees that we passed, and I only had to correct them once when they both agreed on a western hemlock that was actually a grand fir.

“Look at you,” Estrella said. “Taking us both to school.”

“Hey, I might not read Stevenson, but I’m a logger’s son.”

It was too late for lunch and too early for dinner, so the diner was nearly deserted. It appeared as if the hostess was also the cook, and she smiled at us from behind the grill as we entered. “Three for dinner and the show?” she asked.

“Yes, please,” I said. “But what’s this show bit all about?”

“Haven’t you all ever been to Larry’s Out-of-This-World
Scramble House? If you haven’t, you’re in luck, because Larry doesn’t usually work on Mondays when the fish are running.”

“But today’s Sunday,” Estrella said.

“I know. He usually takes Sunday off to get a head start on not working Monday. But he’s here today. And that means if you can eat without laughing your meal is free.”

She brought us to a booth and sat us down with menus. There was an enormous mounted lobster hanging on the wall above our booth and the plaque read:
WORLD’S LARGEST SHRIMP
.

Larry made his appearance a few minutes later. He had the world’s worst toupee, a mustache that curled at the ends, and a smile that curled just as wide. His cheeks were red.

“I see we have three siblings for brunch,” he said. “Who’s the oldest so I know where to deliver the check?”

Mr. Hadley raised his hand, but Estrella pushed it down.

“He’s buying,” she said, pointing at me. “He lost a bet.”

“Welcome to our little diner then. We call it Out-of-This-World because we opened a location on Mars, but it just didn’t have any atmosphere. Hey hey!”

He looked to us for a laugh. We only smiled, determined to get our meals for free if we could.

“We offer breakfast anytime, and our house specialty is French toast during the Renaissance. Ha!”

He paused again, but we all just smiled again.

“I can tell I have my work cut out for me. Tough crowd here. It’s hard to appreciate good humor on an empty stomach, I guess. How about we get some food going for you?”

We all decided that breakfast sounded pretty good. I don’t know why, but there’s something homey about breakfast for dinner on a cold fall day. Mr. Hadley and I both opted for the French toast, with him adding, “Extra whipped cream and extra Renaissance for me, please!” while Estrella decided on Swedish
pancakes, saying that since they served breakfast anytime she’d like hers served during the Enlightenment. This made Mr. Hadley smile. Larry chuckled, and I could tell he wished he’d thought of it himself.

The windows were already getting dark, but the diner was nice and warm, with bright yellow lights and the scent of butter and bread. We made small talk, as if we were just three friends out for an ordinary meal. There was no way any of us could have predicted how it would end.

Larry came by with a big glass of orange juice for each of us. We told him we didn’t order any juice but he said nonsense.

“It’s fresh-squeezed by my pet gorilla every morning. Try it. I promise you it’s out of this world.”

When our breakfasts arrived they were enormous. Estrella and I dug in, but I noticed Mr. Hadley hardly ate any of his; he mostly just picked at the whipped cream. While we ate he told us a story about how June would always order two eggs with her breakfast, one scrambled and the other poached, because she never could decide which she preferred. He said they had a really rude server in Oregon once, so June told him they had poached the wrong egg and sent her breakfast back.

When we had finished eating, Estrella had her heart set on pie. She was torn between marionberry and apple. She just couldn’t decide.

“Apple’s good with cheese melted on top,” I said.

“I know,” she replied, “but marionberry is great warmed up with a scoop of vanilla ice cream. Which would you order, Mr. Hadley?”

“About all I can eat is the ice cream anymore,” he said, “the berry seeds get caught in my bridge. But let me teach you a little trick my father taught me.” Then he hauled a quarter from his pocket as if he had brought it along just in case. He tossed the
coin and caught it, slapping it down on the counter and covering it with his hand. “Heads or tails for apple?” he asked.

“For apple,” Estrella said. “Hmm . . . how about tails.”

He lifted his hand and it was in fact tails.

“Shoot,” Estrella said. “I really wanted marionberry.”

Mr. Hadley smiled, winking at me. “See, the trick works every time. Could you excuse me, Elliot? I need to use the boys’ room.”

I let him out of the booth, helping him up and handing him his cane. He thanked me. Then he noticed the mounted lobster and leaned a little closer to read the plaque.

“Heh!” he said. “If that’s the world’s biggest shrimp, the gorilla who squeezes his orange juice must be his wife.”

Then he shuffled off toward the restrooms in the back.

“The poor man hardly ate anything,” Estrella said once he was out of earshot.

“I know. Maybe we should order him some ice cream.”

Larry came by and Estrella ordered her marionberry pie and a dish of vanilla ice cream for Mr. Hadley, just in case.

“Okay,” Larry said. “But you haven’t laughed yet, so let me try one last time. I hardly have enough business to be giving out free meals. Now, you two look like a nice young couple, so I’ll tell you about the pair who came in last week to celebrate their silver wedding anniversary. I asked them what their secret was. You wanna know what they told me?”

“Sure,” I said. “Lay it on us.”

“They said their secret to a happy marriage was that they always make time to go into the city for romantic dinners.”

Estrella smiled. “How nice.”

“Isn’t it?” Larry replied. “They do it religiously two days a week. The husband goes on Thursdays and the wife goes on Fridays. Bada-boom!”

This time Estrella couldn’t help but laugh.

“Got ya that time!” he said. “One marionberry à la mode and one vanilla double scoop coming up with your check.”

When he brought the desserts over I wished I had ordered pie of my own. It looked that good. Estrella saw me eyeing hers so she offered me a bite from her fork.

“That might just be the best berry pie I’ve ever had.”

“Yes, but is it out of this world?” she asked.

“I think I’d need another bite to be sure.”

She laughed. “Is it rude not to wait for Mr. Hadley?” she asked. “Maybe you should go check on him.”

“He’s fine,” I said. “He spends a lot of time in there at home too. It would only embarrass him if I went to check.”

Estrella told me I had to name the song playing on the kitchen radio if I wanted another bite of her pie. When I informed her that I didn’t listen to country music, she told me she wouldn’t share her pie with a philistine who didn’t appreciate Jim Reeves. I tried to steal a bite while she wasn’t looking, but she caught me.

“Maybe you should eat Mr. Hadley’s ice cream,” she said. “It’s almost all melted anyway.”

“You know what?” I scooted out of the booth. “I’m gonna go check on him. I’ll just let on that I had to use the restroom.”

“I know what you’re up to,” she said. “You’re just trying to get out of the check.”

“No,” I said, pulling out my wallet and laying down a card, “I honor my bets.” Then I leaned over the booth and kissed the top of her head, saying, “Even though it would have been on the house if you hadn’t laughed. I’ll be right back.”

That girl really is something, I thought. She had me smiling all the way to the bathroom. My smile disappeared the instant I opened the door and saw Mr. Hadley on the bathroom floor.

“Help!” I shouted, leaning out from the bathroom but not wanting to take my eyes off of him. “Call an ambulance now!”

It was the longest ten minutes of my life, sitting on the floor holding him, checking repeatedly for his faint pulse. He was so light and so limp in my arms I almost felt like I was holding a doll.

We followed the ambulance to Providence hospital in Everett, doing nearly eighty the entire way.

“I should have checked on him sooner.”

“You didn’t know, Elliot,” Estrella said.

“I should have been more aware.”

“Elliot, this is not your fault.”

“It was my idea to go to the diner.”

“Come on. That had nothing to do with it.”

“He’ll be okay. Right? I know he’s going to be okay.”

Estrella grabbed my free hand and held it, which reassured me some, but she didn’t say anything. I focused on the ambulance lights ahead of us and drove like a man trying to outrun death.

It was a long time waiting before we could get any information from anyone, other than general reassurances that they were taking care of him. We sat in the lobby and tried to take our minds off what had happened by watching the people passing through. You see a pretty good cross-section of society hanging out in a hospital lobby. I guess disease and death are democratic.

Eventually, a nurse came to get us. He looked about twelve to me, but what do I know. He was nice at least.

“Mr. Hadley is stable and awake now,” he said. “We’d like to keep him overnight, but he’s insisting on going home.”

“Is that a good idea?” I asked. “I mean, after what just happened. He must have had a stroke. Or a heart attack.”

“None of that.” The nurse shook his head. “Mr. Hadley
fainted. He has low blood pressure and it appears he took too much of his pain medication. Has he been complaining of more pain lately, or has he been unusually active?”

I glanced at Estrella before answering. “Maybe. I know he was walking around without his cane and stuff.”

The nurse shrugged, as if to say
What can you do
?

“So, he’ll be all right, then?” I asked. “He’s fine?”

The nurse looked back and forth between Estrella and me. “You’re aware of Mr. Hadley’s condition, aren’t you? I mean, he has told you?”

“He’s told us he plans to kill himself,” I said, hoping maybe if I exposed his plan now the nurse could help me talk him out of it.

“There’s nothing suicidal about that man,” the nurse said, “I’ll vouch for that. I was a witness on his competency form. He’s been entertaining us all around here for a long time and would keep it up forever no doubt, if he could. And everyone wishes that that were the case, trust me. There aren’t many patients loved here more than Mr. Hadley.”

“So, there’s no hope, then,” I said. “Nothing we can do?”

“There is hope,” the nurse said. “Hope for quality time with people he loves. Hope for a peaceful transition. Some days will be better than others, but the symptoms will continue to get worse until the cancer runs its course or he decides he’s had enough. So, yes, there is something you can do. You can be with him. Make him comfortable. Make him feel loved. Help him die with dignity. That’s all any of us can do now.”

I’ll tell you what, he might have been young, but he was a hell of a nurse. I looked at Estrella. She had tears in her eyes. I felt like crying but I didn’t. Instead, I reached for Estrella and pulled her to me and hugged her.

“Is he really demanding to be taken home?” I asked the nurse, still hugging Estrella.

“You know Mr. Hadley,” he replied. “Says he has an appointment to keep with his wife tomorrow. It’ll be an hour or so yet before we can discharge him. I’ll send you home with some pamphlets on pain management and palliative care. We have one on what to expect at the end of life too. I’m assuming you’re taking on the role of his primary carer.”

Primary
carer
. I looked at Estrella, then at the nurse.

“I am?”

The nurse glanced up from his clipboard. “I asked him if it was okay to speak with you about his medical records before coming out, and he said you were not only the executor of his estate but his best friend.”

Now the tears did well up—so fast, in fact, that the nurse’s face blurred right there in front of me in the bright hospital hall.