Authors: K.T. Hastings
“Where do you want to go that we haven't been, Jake?” Brandee asked.
He thought for just a second or two before answering. “I want to say that I've been in all 50 states. I want to eat or stay the night in every state in the union.”
This answer wasn't what Brandee wanted to hear. “Don't you want to go someplace mysterious and romantic? Come on, Jake! Think big. Who cares if you ever get to Kansas? It's just Nevada without the big casinos. I want to go to Casablanca, or Borneo. I want to ride a camel over a sand dune. I want to do what most people don't do. Like sing in front of a pyramid.”
Her sense of adventure always delighted Jake. The truth was, he only wanted to be with her, whether it was in Topeka, Kansas or faraway Morocco. He had done a little bit of international travel when he was young. His parents had taken Jake and Rebecca to Israel and Egypt with a stopover in Copenhagen when Jake was 11 years old. Jake had thought that the trip was great fun. He had ridden a boat on the Sea of Galilee, and sipped a beer in Denmark. It was a great memory for him.
Brandee was his greatest adventure, though. He thought as much as he wound his fingers through her hair. He hoped that she found being with him as exciting as he found being with her. This tour was the most exciting thing that he had ever done. It was because of Brandee. They were seeing parts of America together (not the prettiest part, he granted, looking at the scrubby bushes along the side of the highway) and he couldn't be happier. Combine that with getting to hear her sing virtually every night. What could be better?
The group's one night off had whetted Jake's appetite to see her on stage in Laramie. He thought to himself about his favorite part of her stage presentation.
Jake loved the wind machine. Watching her undulate under the touch of the wind machine, which usually occurred about halfway through the show, was the highlight of the evening to him. He had never told Brandee this, because it was a part of the show where she actually wasn't singing, and he didn't know how she would feel about that. He couldn't help it though. The sight of her hard little body writhing in response to the motion of the air around her made Jake physically aroused. It didn't matter how often he saw the show.
Jake knew that, most nights, he wasn't the only one who liked the windy times. When he could tear his eyes away, he looked into the crowd to see what effect it was all having on the people who had come to the show. He saw the look in the eyes of the men. He knew what they were thinking. The fact that they couldn't have what he had beside him right now made Jake realize how lucky he was. He didn't need Borneo. He had Brandee Evans.
***
The rest of the trip to Laramie was largely uneventful for the other members of
Brandee.
Bruce asked Suzi if she was okay every 10 minutes, but other than that, the three musicians mostly kept up a convivial banter. Suzi gave Bruce some grief for having asked “how” in response to her revelation, and Bruce defended himself. Diane was greatly amused by the give and take.
Jake and Brandee continued their conversation about their hopes and dreams for the future. Often enough, their ambitions were similar, but what kept showing up during their talk was how much more adventurous Brandee was than her husband. Never before had the difference in their ages shown up as much as it did on this day. At 34, Jake was more settled than his young prize. It wasn't only the age difference though.
By nature, Jake was more content with how life played out. He had been raised in a stable loving household. Certainly he wanted to succeed, but he wasn't as driven as Brandee would have liked him to be.
Brandee was a climber. Ever since she had lost her father in her teens, she had fought destiny, always reaching for the next rung, fearful that the one she was on was going to disappear from under her. As much as she loved Jake, she wanted her happiness to be a result of what she did, not the actions of others.
Shortly after 2 p.m., the members of the group reunited in Laramie, Wyoming. They had 5 hours before they needed to be onstage at Arena Auditorium.
The University of Wyoming was a hidden gem. Just east of the beautiful Snowy Range in extreme southeastern Wyoming, UW offered a blend of academic and socio-cultural opportunities. These included year-round cultural and recreational activities. Located in Laramie, a town of 30,000 with a milieu that is both small town out West friendliness and larger city sophistication, UW educated over 13,000 students from all 50 states and more than 75 countries. The University was a research facility, a leader in aerospace as well as wind power technology.
Arena Auditorium was located mid-campus. Unimpressive from the outside, its pure dome shape offered excellent performance acoustics. Despite its square footage, its 16,000 person seating capacity didn't seem that large to
Brandee.
The balcony hovered over the main floor seating area, giving the venue an intimacy that belied its size. The rehearsal and sound check went off without a hitch, and soon the group was together again in the parking lot. Jake and Brandee were headed for The Holiday Inn, which was conveniently right next to campus. Diane, Suzi, and Bruce would be right behind them after securing the instruments and the vehicles. Before they separated from the musicians for a couple of hours, though, Jake had a question.
“What's going on?” he asked Suzi.
Suzi, startled a little by the abrupt question, simply answered, “What?”
“It's just different today. Usually you're bouncing around, carrying everything in sight. Today you're kind of wandering around looking lost. Every time you do try to pick something up, Bruce grabs it from you and says, 'Here, I'll take that'. What's up, Suzi?”
The other 2 musicians stopped what they were doing to watch the exchange between Jake and Suzi. They, of course, knew what was different. All had agreed, though, that it would be up to Suzi to decide when to tell the Evanses about her condition.
Suzi was planning on sharing the news of her pregnancy with Jake and Brandee after the show, when the group got together for their post-performance dinner. She had wanted the pre-show to go off routinely, and then the performance to be a smash success before telling them. It wasn't a superstition thing; it was more of a feeling that the group had gotten into a groove and she didn't want anything to happen to impair the evening performance. She felt this way for two reasons.
First, because she was a proud and talented musician in her own right. The group had gotten into a rhythm and she didn't want anything to hamper their performance that night.
Secondly, she didn't want to be the cause of Brandee not being happy if things didn't go well. Now she had to decide whether to keep her own counsel or share the news in the parking lot of Arena Auditorium. She glanced quickly at Brandee, who was standing a little separate from the group, and dove right in.
“I'm a little bit pregnant.”
Jake whooped with delight at the news. He picked Suzi up and gave her the third happy spin of the day. Brandee smiled broadly and stepped in to give Suzi a hug, saying, “I'm really happy for you Suzi.”
By this time, Jake was in front of Bruce.
“Way to go, Dad!” Jake said, alternately pumping his hand and slapping his back in congratulations. Bruce's bearded face split wide open in the biggest smile that Jake had ever seen come across Bruce's face. He returned Jake's handshake and slaps on the back in kind. Finally, he gathered Jake up in a bear hug and the two men did their own, highly energetic but short on grace, happy dance in the middle of the campus of The University of Wyoming.
Suddenly, Jake stepped back and looked sternly at Suzi and Bruce.
“Why were we the last to know? She's not even surprised," he said, pointing to the smiling Diane E. Hoover who was standing nearby.
Suzi turned a few shades of red. She was okay with the rest of the story, though. She was among friends.
“I kind of had to tell them. Diane guessed when we had to stop so I could irrigate the side of the freeway this morning. Bruce is a guy, so he was a little slow, but I told him at the same time.
Jake nodded at this playful bit of gender bashing, and said without missing a beat, “You’re right. We're better at building things and watching football than we are at guessing when women are with child, as they say.”
Everyone laughed then, partly because of Jake's use of the archaic expression and partly in relief that the news was out. Suzi and Bruce were going to be parents. Jake figured that he and Brandee might get an invitation to be godparents to young Mr. or Miss Jackson, and he couldn't be more thrilled for Suzi and Bruce, whom he counted as dear friends. Jake could only imagine what it might be like to be them. He couldn't wait to start a family with Brandee.
Finally, the members of the group split up at the Holiday Inn. Brandee lay down on the pillow top mattress with her usual cold compress over her eyes while Jake made a quick phone call to the facilities manager of Arena Auditorium. Jake had noticed that Brandee's M&M's were already chilling in the refrigerator, but that there had been no sign of the mandarin oranges. The only time on the trip that Brandee hadn't had her oranges was at the Western Folklife Center in Elko. Privately, Jake thought there were a lot of reasons why Brandee had been off of her game that night, and that it had nothing to do with mandarin oranges, but he knew that a happy Brandee was a more confident Brandee, and that a confident Brandee lit up the stage.
The facilities manager said that they were having a little trouble rounding up mandarin oranges but assured Jake that by the time Brandee got back to the dressing room at about 5:30 they would be there. He was sending to Cheyenne (about 45 minutes one way) for the oranges and he knew they would arrive on time. Jake thanked him for his diligence and started to sit down on the chair beside the bed.
Without taking the cloth off of her eyes, Brandee patted the bed beside her. Jake was a little surprised by this, because Brandee usually wanted the bed to herself during her pre-show power nap. Pleased, though, that she wanted company, he lay down beside his wife.
They lay quietly side-by-side for almost a minute, before Brandee broke the silence.
“I think it's great about Bruce and Suzi.”
Jake nodded, knowing she would sense the nod even with her eyes closed.
“Me too. They're going to be great as parents.”
Suzi continued, “I'm glad it's not us, though.”
“Me too, for right now”, Jake said, “Can you imagine trying to be on stage in the lead spot every night? We can cover for Suzi if she needs a break. It wouldn't be the same but we could hire another bass player for a night or two if we needed to. Without you, we don't have a show.”
There was a short pause before Brandee spoke again. “Jake, I think I don't ever want that to be us. At least not for a long, long time.”
Jake was surprised. Before he and Brandee had gotten married, they had discussed having children. Neither of them wanted a large family, but both of them had spoken positively about starting a small family someday. As Jake remembered the conversations now, though, he had been the more enthusiastic of the two.
“I would like to have a child with you sometime," he said to Brandee, who lay motionless beside him. “It would be a living testimony to our love.”
She opened her eyes and moved the cloth a little so she could see Jake. She took his left hand in her right.
“I'd like to have your baby, Jake. I really would. I just don't know how I can get to where I want to be professionally, though, if I'm held back by being a mom.
Jake broke in. “A lot of people have families and careers too, honey.”
Brandee shook her head firmly. “I don't want just a career. I want to be a star! And I can get there. I'm tired of playing in front of Nora Denice and Fucking Lizzie! This trip is supposed to get me noticed, and it will. I can feel it, Jake!”
“Yes baby. I know you will.
Brandee
is going to be headlining at the best places. I just don't think you should close the door on having our baby at some point in time.”
With that last statement, Jake brushed the side of her cheek with his fingers. He couldn't ever remember thinking she was any more beautiful than she was right now. He knew that she was getting ready for the performance, and that this wasn't the time to press the issue. He finished with one last request.
“That's all I ask, Brandee. Just don't close the door on the idea of having a family with me.”