Finding Hope (Love's Compass Book 2) (3 page)

A life of protecting the residents of Kitner was behind him now. His eyes roamed the workshop, taking in the different projects that awaited his attention. It was time to focus on what was ahead.

Right now, that meant sanding for a while and then shaping new legs for a table set a customer had ordered before his father had the stroke. It was one of the few pieces he had to finish that his dad had originally started.

Lance was so engrossed in his work that when a voice spoke from the entrance to his workshop, he spun around, tool in hand.

“That hammer’s almost menacing.” There was humor in Lexi’s voice.

The bright summer sun shone behind her, creating a silhouette. He might not be able to see her face, but there was no mistaking Lexi’s stature. Light shone through the edges of her short hair, illuminating it like a halo.

“If I was worried about who was coming in, I’d have pulled out the real backup.” He patted the gun he had concealed at his waist. He’d been carrying a firearm for so many years, it was almost an extension of himself. He had to make a point of going target shooting regularly now that he was no longer with the force.

He put the hammer down and stood.

“Hey, Lex. Come on in.”

After dusting the sawdust off the chair in the corner, he motioned to it.

She stepped into the room and he could see her face. Her brown eyes landed on the chair and she crossed her arms. “I’m good, thanks.”

He leaned against one of the support beams. “What brings you here?”

Lexi tried to organize her thoughts. She’d decided to come and apologize after brushing Lance off Sunday night. His concern had been kind and she didn’t want him to think she felt otherwise.

He’d been such a frequent visitor to their house growing up that the only way anyone on the outside knew he wasn’t a real member of the family was because of his appearance. His blond hair and blue eyes stood in stark contrast to the Chandler family’s darker features. He had a goatee he always kept trimmed. She barely remembered him without it.

Lance was studying her, his expression open. Had his eyes always been that intense shade of blue?

A pang of guilt brought her wayward thoughts home. She cleared her throat and tried to think of something to say. “You know, you’re the only one who makes a nickname out of my nickname. Is Lexi not short enough for you?”

He chuckled and lifted a shoulder. “For whatever reason, I’ve always thought ‘Lex’ in my head since we were kids.” He continued to rest against the support beam, his eyes on her.

Come on. Blurt out an apology and be done with it. “Hey, I’m sorry about last night. I hadn’t meant to be so rude.”

“It’s all right. Just because I asked if you were okay didn’t mean you had to talk about it. I saw your reaction to that picture of your parents and wanted to check in with you.”

“I appreciate that.” She paused. “They were happy together. That picture is the last one where my dad looked like himself.” Once he’d been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer, his health had degraded rapidly. Much faster than anyone had prepared for. “Thank you for not pushing me.”

“I get why you didn’t want to go into it last night. Not to mention you have a lot of family I’m sure you turn to first. But I’m here if you need to talk, and I hope you realize that.”

“Thanks.” She wasn’t an overly emotional individual, yet she could feel the tears pricking the back of her eyelids. She closed them, willing the moisture away. Crying in front of Lance was the last thing she wanted to do. “Will you please pray for me on Thursday?” Her voice broke, which frustrated her further.

Lance pushed away from the beam, his brows creased. “Of course I will. You need to talk to your mom or Tuck.”

“I can’t.” She refused to tell them until after her appointment. At two and a half hours away, Dallas wasn’t exactly next door. She needed to go through the logistics of the drive and survive the appointment. Once she knew what she was dealing with, she would let her family know.

She hadn’t realized her mind had drifted until Lance was beside her and guiding her to the chair.

“I’m worried about you, Lex.”

She should have called or sent a note to apologize instead of coming herself. Lexi took a deep breath and was about to stand and leave, but something told her not to. The concern on Lance’s face made her pause. “I have to see an oncologist in Dallas on Thursday.”

Lance took a step closer and reached for her hand, but stopped before he’d touched her. Thank goodness. She didn’t know if she could keep up the calm demeanor if he had.

“I don’t want to talk to anyone else until after the appointment. It may be nothing. I won’t cause my family worry for no reason.”

“But your doctor wants you to see the oncologist just in case.”

“Yes.”

“What time on Thursday?”

“One in the afternoon.”

“And you’re going to drive down and back the same day?”

“That’s the plan.”

Lance gave a quick nod. “I’ll take you.”

Lexi sprang to her feet. “No, you won’t.”

“You can’t go by yourself. Not to an appointment like this.”

She turned away and moved towards the door. “I shouldn’t have said anything.”

He reached for her arm and stopped her, gently tugging her around to face him before letting go. The last thing she expected was the warmth his touch created. It spread all the way up her arm and straight to her heart.

“Are you scared?”

Lexi took a steadying breath. “I’d be crazy if I wasn’t, right?”

“Yeah, you would. Then I’ll pick you up and take you. What time did you plan on leaving?” His eyes dared her to argue with him.

Lexi wanted to object. She wanted to tell him to mind his own business. But she couldn’t. Because she didn’t want to face the whole thing alone, either. “Eight. I wanted to have time to find the place.”

“I’ll stop by your apartment at eight on Thursday morning, then.”

“Thanks, Lance.”

“You’re welcome. Do you have my phone number?” She shook her head and he jotted it down on a piece of paper. “If you need anything, or want to talk, call me.”

She forced a smile and tucked the paper into a back pocket. “Thanks again. I’ll let you get back to work.”

Lexi returned to her car and headed for the hospital. The memory of his kindness, and the lingering feel of his hand on her arm, stayed with her the rest of the day.

~

Lance was five minutes from Lexi’s place and had spent the majority of the drive in prayer. He hadn’t spoken with her since she came to his workshop on Monday and he had a lot of questions.

What kind of cancer did her doctor suspect? Would they want to perform a biopsy while she was in Dallas?

He’d packed a small bag in case the oncologist surprised her and wanted her to stay the night. They could get two hotel rooms if that were the case.

What would Lexi’s prognosis be? That she might have to go through treatment, much less anything worse, tied his stomach in knots.

“God, only You know what our futures hold. No matter what happens today, I pray You fill Lex with wisdom and peace. Please use me as a source of encouragement and strength for her.”

He tried to pull his thoughts from the different scenarios that kept running through his mind. There was no sense in going there until she knew more, right?

What if she didn’t let him know what the doctor told her today? Then he would have to be content to wait until she felt comfortable sharing the news.

The navy blue Jeep Wrangler he drove had just stopped in front of her apartment when the door swung open. Lance jogged around the vehicle to hold the passenger door for her. He noticed she carried a small duffel bag and offered to put it in the back seat.

They got settled and he drove them through town and onto the highway that lead out of Kitner.

So far, Lexi had said little and he expected a long drive. He glanced at her out of the corner of his eye.

Dressed in dark jeans and a deep purple blouse, she sat with her hands resting on her knees. Her head was up as she watched the terrain speed by. The picture of confidence. That was Lexi.

It had been way too quiet and he tried to think of something to say to spark a conversation. “We’ll have to figure out how to get to the doctor’s office using the GPS once we get closer to Dallas. Chances are, it’s downtown and that area is a mess to drive in.”

She nodded. “I have the address. They said to use a big parking structure and take an elevator to the eighth floor. There’s a sky bridge that’ll lead us over to the right building.”

“That sounds like a plan.”

They rode in silence which continued to build until it was about all Lance could take. He contemplated turning the radio on.

He had to suppress a start when Lexi cleared her throat.

“I’m not real good about sharing personal things.”

“With your brother’s friend?”

“With anyone.”

He glanced at her and caught a small smile, pulling the corners of his own mouth upwards. “You’re the listener.”

She angled her head to the side and pursed her lips. “Excuse me?”

“You’re the one who listens to everyone else. I remember that was the case when we were kids, too. It seemed like people trusted you with their secrets. But I don’t remember you ever talking about yourself much.” She was silent and he stole another glance. “Am I wrong?”

“No, you’re not wrong.”

“Everyone needs to talk things out. I’m not saying you should consider me to be your new best friend. But there’s got to be somebody you trust.”

Another peek and he could tell she was staring at him. “I thought you were coming along as my chauffeur, not my priest.”

He took a deep breath. The last thing he’d wanted to do was make her angry. But when he saw the twinkle in her eye, a deep laugh rumbled from his chest. “Keep my white collar in the glove box. Check.” He gave her a wink and she rewarded him with a smile that lit up her face. He kept his gaze on her for a split second longer before reluctantly returning his attention to the road.

~

Lexi had insisted that Lance go explore the clinic or check out the cafeteria while she waited for her appointment. There was an empty feeling in the pit of her stomach as it was. She didn’t need to have him there trying to make her feel better.

He’d agreed, made sure she had his phone number, and disappeared around the corner. She appreciated that he hadn’t insisted on staying.

She could see why Tuck and Lance’s friendship had lasted into adulthood. There was one thing she could say about the man who drove her here: he was loyal.

Lance was also handsome. The realization surprised Lexi. He wasn’t overly tall, but the muscles in his arms were well-defined after years of working for the police force and now as a carpenter. His hands were large, his fingers long. She couldn’t help but notice them when he’d stopped her the other day. They were strong, yet had touched her with a gentleness she hadn’t expected.

Lexi thought his strongest features were those bright blue eyes and that disarming smile. When used in combination, she doubted there were many people alive who could resist him.

She felt a measure of guilt for not giving him a proper explanation about her health after all the effort he was putting into helping her. Once she spoke with the oncologist, she would tell him more.

Assuming she ever got called back for her appointment in the first place.

Great, now a muscle near her right eye was twitching. This waiting was going to drive her insane. A peek at the time told her it’d only been five minutes since the last time she’d checked.

If they would call her name before the mass on her ovary plotted to take over the rest of her body, it would be fantastic.

“Alexis Chandler.”

She flinched despite the anticipation. Unable to feel her legs, she walked across the room to the nurse holding a door open for her.

“How are you doing today?”

What was she supposed to say? Should she admit she’s nervous? Or tell the woman about how this was the last place in the world she wanted to be?

“I’m doing okay. How are you?”

“It’s been a busy day around here. I’m going to get your weight and then I’ll show you to one of our exam rooms.”

Lexi rubbed damp palms on her pants and tried to quiet the pulse that was pounding in her head. She said a silent prayer for God to give her the strength to get through this appointment. She wanted the oncologist to tell her it had all been a mistake and it was just an ovarian cyst after all. She wanted to be all right.

The nurse made small talk while she took Lexi’s blood pressure, heart rate, and asked a few questions. Once she had left to get the doctor, she returned in minutes.

The physician that entered was little over five feet tall. But she was friendly, smiling as she held a hand out. “I’m Doctor Ravenhill. I’ve gone through the chart your doctor sent over. If you have no objections, I would like to do a sonogram of my own to search for a few specific things. Do you have pain all the time?”

Lexi nodded, clasping her hands together in her lap. “To different degrees, yes.”

Doctor Ravenhill jotted a few things down.

They continued the appointment in this way until the doctor asked the nurse to show Lexi to the imaging room.

She stood, a chill coursing down her spine as she followed the nurse.