Finn (36 page)

“You need to talk to her, Reese. Stop her from coming over. It’s putting everyone in a bad position. She’s your best friend. Tripp is mine. This is not going anywhere.”

Reese nods in agreement. “She wants to be around you, Finn. She’s a caregiver by nature. You should let her be your friend.”

“Maybe one day that’ll be possible, but right now, it’s not. She chose to give up on us, on me, when I was vulnerable. Any other time, I’d have fought like hell and never taken no for an answer, but you weren’t there. She made up her mind, and if I hadn’t ended things, she would have waited until I was home, making me feel like a charity case.”

“Bitch,” Tripp utters under his breath.

“Hey! She’s hurting, too!” Reese jumps to her defense, jostling the bed and causing me to wince.

“Sorry, babe, but I call it like I see it. I like her, I do, but Finn is right. She made her decision. Time to live with it.”

“Please, Finn,” she pleads with me. “Talk to her. It doesn’t mean you have to get back together. Talking is just talking. You loved each other. Let her know you’re okay. Let her see you. She’s going out of her mind.”

“I’ll think about it. Can I eat in peace now?”

“Hell no. Either you join us in the living room, or I bring the recliner in here. There’s a game on tonight.” Tripp wiggles his eyebrows, and I throw my head back in mental exhaustion.

“Oh, for God’s sake, I’m sick of waiting!” Ember strolls in with Robbie behind her, looking at me with fire in his eyes.

“Either you get your ass out here and eat with us, or I carry you. No way is my wife lying in bed with you, and there’s nowhere else to sit in this fucking room.”

“Robbie!” Ember ignores him and scoots in next to me, hugging me carefully. Robbie growls, and I practically see steam coming from his ears. Usually, I’d think this was hilarious, but tonight, I can’t laugh, so I kiss her on the forehead and push up.

“Okay, give me ten minutes. We’ll eat in the living room.” I eye Robbie as the others pile out. “You want to help me with the bandage?”

“Fucking hell. Finally, you ask for help?”

I grumble on the way to the shower and catch my reflection. I look like hell. My eyes are sunken and pale. The scruff on my face is a full-grown beard, unkempt and shaggy. The sweats I’m wearing are wrinkled and stink.

Shit, I’m scaring myself.

I turn on the shower and peel out of the clothes, pulling off the adhesive bandage covering the remains of my stitches. The shower helps relieve some of the tension in my shoulders, but nothing can help the aching in my heart. I grab my body wash and notice Presley’s shampoo still perched on the ledge.

Memories flood my mind of washing her hair and fucking her up against the tile as she whimpered uncontrollably, trying to hold in her cries. I picture the way her wet hair plastered against her head and how she shook when I forced myself to let her go, then kissed her until the water ran ice cold.

In such a short amount of time, she infiltrated my life so much that even showering becomes painful.

Fuckin’ A, it’s time I start to move on.

“I’m pissed at her, really fucking pissed.” Robbie’s bitter tone cuts through the bathroom. “Part of me wants to tell you to fuck her out of your system, but I know it’s not possible. That’s not how this works.”

“Nope, you’d know. When we find it, we find it.”

“So what can I do?”

“Get out of my fucking bathroom so I don’t embarrass you with the size of my dick?” I shut off the water and grin at my lame attempt at humor.

“Never happen, but you need anything, you say the word.”

“Got it.” I slide the curtain halfway and grab the closest towel I can reach.

“Jesus, you’re pitiful. Is that towel even clean?” He wrinkles his nose.

“Hope so. You gonna watch or get the shit ready for my bandage?”

“I’ll meet you in the bedroom. It has to be more sanitary that this atrocity.” He leaves while his words hang in the air.

Atrocity is a word Presley would throw out on a whim…

Maybe it’s time I find her and see exactly what happens when we’re face to face.

“Pull over here and let me out,” I instruct Tripp and point to the ‘No Parking Zone’ in front of the K9 offices.

“I’ll wait.”

“Suit yourself.” I fold out of the car, cursing the fact I still can’t drive myself.

I watch him park and give myself a second to mentally prepare for what I’m about to do. It was my choice to show up unannounced and take Presley off-guard. It was the only way to gauge an authentic reaction to seeing me after the way we left things in the hospital. Her calls, messages, and gifts have gone unacknowledged, but I know seeing the look on her face will tell me what I need to know.

Is there anything worth fighting for?

The receptionist greets me with a sexy smile and doesn’t hide her blatant stare as I approach.

“Hi, I’m here to see Presley Chambers.”

Her smile falters when she calls to the back. Then her eyes light up and she hangs up, giving me a pouty face. “You missed her. She’s at lunch with her boyfriend.”

“Her what?”

“The volunteer in back said she left with a man about forty-five minutes ago.”

I don’t jump to conclusions, because obviously, it could be Johnny. I thank the lady and shut down her attempts to talk further, heading to Tripp’s truck. He’s on the phone, leaning against the back, and when I approach, his eyes go wide.

“Son of a goddammed bitch to all fucking hell!” he hisses.

I give him a crooked look then see what he’s focused on. Presley is walking across the street with her face directed up at the sky, laughing loudly. Her arm is linked with none other than the fucking safe and boring Russell glowing at her side.

I watch him kiss her cheek before she turns to go into the building. He stares a little too long then swivels his face to mine.

We lock eyes; he knows who I am and doesn’t hide his cocky smirk. The urge to beat his ass simmers from deep inside, but I swallow hard and give him a chin jerk, getting into the car.

Tripp slams his own door and sits quietly for a second before yelling. “Fuck the doctor’s orders. Fuck the antibiotics and pain pills. You want to get drunk?”

“No, man, take me home. I have some arrangements to make and a house to back out of.”

Presley

T
he world-class bitch of the year award goes to me.

How could I be so fucking stupid? Stupid, stupid, stupid… I bang my head against my kitchen table over and over.

“Are you still there? Have you banged some sense into your senseless, heartless, good-for-nothing head yet?” Reese screeches through the phone line.

“It was harmless! I promise! Whatever he thought he saw, it was nothing. Absolutely nothing! It was lunch.”

“Presley, you’ve fucked up. I pleaded with him to talk to you, just to look at you. I knew he’d melt on the spot. But, no, you have to fuck it all the fucking way up by walking up with Russell on your arm and letting him kiss your cheek. And you were laughing! Really, Pres? What the hell has Russell ‘the dud’ ever said that’s amusing? NOTHING!”

“Reese! Stop! I feel bad enough. It was innocent and harmless. Russell was trying to cheer me up with a corny and tasteless joke. It was horrible. That’s why I was laughing.”

“Great timing.” Venom spews from her voice, and I finally shatter.

“What the fuck is wrong with you? You are my best friend, my sister in life, the one supposed to be holding my hand through this break-up. Instead, you have the gall to call and give me grief for the only smile I’ve cracked in weeks? How dare you!”

I hang up and throw my phone across the sofa, stewing. This is a normal occurrence with us lately.

She calls… I cry… she listens… I beg for advice… then I drive to Finn’s house with some sort of peace offering and a sliver of hope he’ll see me. None of it has worked out.

The sound of a key in my lock sends a rush of hope through me.

Has Finn come back?

Reese walks in with a scowl on her face that quickly turns to disgust.

“This place stinks!” She proceeds to open the front windows and walks around my apartment, looking like a runway model with her cashmere sweater, trouser pants, and gorgeous four-inch salmon heels, while I burrow into my sofa in two-day old yoga sweats. I get a whiff of myself and gag, but don’t let her see my embarrassment.

“If it stinks, then leave.”

“Nope, I’m taking over.” She storms to my kitchen and comes back with a look of panic on her face. “You have nothing. No wine, no food, no tequila, nothing!”

“Haven’t exactly been to the store unless I bought food to make for Finn.” My voice cracks at my new reality.

“Oh, honey.” She slips next to me and feathers the hair off my face, forcing me to look at her. “We’ll get through this.”

“You’re so mad at me.” My lips start to quiver, and I sense the breakdown creeping up.

“I am mad at you, but I’m also your best friend, your sister in life, and the one holding your hand,” she repeats my words from earlier. “And I’m here now.”

“Thank you.”

“I’m going to the store for essentials. While I’m gone, you think you can get a bath or a shower? I’ll clean up and make you dinner when I get back.”

“I miss him so much, Reese. Everything reminds me of him. I was an idiot, but I was scared. Even now, knowing how much I hurt, I’d probably make the same decision. If he’d have died that day, I’d be devastated. But give it a year and he died, I’d die along with him. This was for the best.”

Her face fills with sympathy, and she leans in to kiss my forehead. “I respect that. I really do. Now, I’m done trying to make it work. No more badgering, no more blaming. I’m officially out. You both are incredible people, but sometimes, love isn’t enough. So let’s start the healing process with a girls’ night. I’ll be back in an hour.”

I nod and get off the sofa, taking the blanket with me and throwing it in the washer as I head to my room. She turns on the alarm when she leaves, and I go back to the living room to find my phone.

My finger lingers over Finn’s number for a good two minutes before I get the courage to press send.

“Hello,” he answers sharply.

“Please, don’t hang up.”

“What’s up?”

“It’s not what you think. Reese told me what you saw, and Russell is dating someone new. He came by to tell me about her and asked me to lunch. It was innocent and platonic and totally unromantic.”

The line is quiet, except for the huffs of his breath. “Thank you for telling me.”

“I’m sorry I missed you that day. I’d have loved to see you.”

“Well, it’s for the best. Nothing’s changed, right?”

“Actually, a lot has changed. I’ve been—“

“Fiiiiiinnnnn, where are you?” A shrill, whiny female voice calls for him.

“Look, Presley, I need to go. Maybe we can catch up when I’m back.” His tone is flat, sending a knife to my heart.

“Where are you, exactly?”

“I’m with Max in Virginia. I should go.”

“But wait! Who was that?”

“He has guests over. I can’t talk to you right now.”

“Are you… are you hooking up with someone?”

The line goes dead, and my heart splinters into a million pieces. I crumble on the floor and sob, screaming into the empty room, begging for another chance. I did this. My fear and uncertainties finally win. Everything comes crashing down, and I know I’ve made the biggest mistake of my life.