Read Fire and Ice: Rekindled (The Fire and Ice Series Book 2) Online
Authors: Kiara Delaney
Hailey
I was feeling smothered, and needed some privacy, if only
for a few moments. I rounded the bar, eager to escape to the bathroom for just
a few minutes of solitude. As I stepped into the hallway, my breath hitched at
the sight of Kellan. With his hand propped on the back door, ready to leave, he
must have heard my footsteps, and turned to peer at me with those deep
chocolate pools I had found myself lost in, in what seemed like a lifetime ago,
yet also felt like just yesterday.
He slowly turned to face me, letting his hand fall from the
door, as we faced each other in silence. My body flushed as he peered at me
with an all-consuming intensity. He took a hesitant step towards me, and I
instinctually stepped back away from him. Cocking his head to the side, he said
with sympathetic eyes, "Please, don't."
"Don't what?" I rasped out.
"Don't shut me out," he pled.
I began to fidget nervously with my hands, looking back over
my shoulder, feeling cornered, and wondering if I should run back to the safety
of the crowd. Knowing Kellan, he'd only follow me, and make a scene. I
certainly didn't need that on my conscience today of all days.
Looking back to him with trepidation, I replied,
"There's nothing to talk about, Kellan."
He placed his one hand on his hip, and rubbed his forehead
with the other before replying, "Please? I was up half the night thinking
about...things I need to say to you."
"Don't you get it?" I bit out, crossing my arms in
front of myself. "It's the same old, same old with you. You're going to
feed me a bunch of bullshit, and then you'll be on your merry way. I don't want
to hear your lie..."
Kellan was in front of me in two long strides, one hand
gripping my throat just enough to force my back against the wall, and tip my
head to meet his fiery gaze, and the other braced against the wall beside me,
as he wedged his knee between my thighs, caging me in. He brushed his face
against mine, and breathed heavily into my ear, "Third time's a charm,
Princess. Feel like going for broke?"
God, his words evoked an erotic wanton need in me that
blazed every time he was near, and sent scorching waves pulsing through my body
at the slightest touch. He was the only man that could ever make me wet with
just one look, the faintest smell of him, even the mention of his name. Why was
I fighting my blatant attraction to him?
Because
you just buried your husband. Because he'll never be capable of loving you.
Because one night won't be enough. Because he destroyed you!
Kellan
For Christ's sake, I couldn't be within a foot of this woman
and not want to take her where she stood. When it came down to it, the very
thought of her made my body ache with need, hunger for her taste, and want to
fuck her into oblivion. I was a fool to think the distance between us could
ever douse those flames. She permeated my being like the ink etched into my skin
that still resided above my heart, a daily reminder of where she belonged. A
reminder I tried desperately to dispel all these years. All it took was one
look from her to bring back a thousand memories; one touch and my body was
instantly begging for her sweet rapture.
I leaned my head against the wall and loosened my grip on
her, letting my hand fall to the curve of her waist where it lingered, as I
breathed heavily into her ear. What in the fuck was I doing? She was right.
Come morning, I'd be gone with the wind, and I knew one night with her wouldn't
be enough. It would only leave me craving for more, and I'd been down that
road.
When Hailey tossed me to the side, I made off like a bandit
in the night, and sailed into Reno, desperate to disperse any trace of her in
my mind. The four-month bender I went on did little to exorcise my demons; if
anything, it made it worse. There wasn't enough whiskey or women to drive out
the drowning pain, and I'd spiraled into a maddening vortex of delusional,
self-soothing behavior.
After being up on speed for three days straight, and an
after-hours threesome at the bar I was managing, I passed out cold in the back
office one night. I woke up to a bar full of empty registers, and a pissed off
boss that handed me my walking papers. Considering the size of our bouncers, I
was lucky I didn't get my ass handed to me; I figured I got off easy.
After deciding to clean up my act, and working in several
shit holes to redeem myself, I was finally able to get back on track and start
working on my business degree. I've been through hell and back over the last
three years, and come out the other side intact. I'm not about to play into a
hand that will fuck up everything I've been working for.
I raised my head, breaking myself out of my thoughts, and
stared deep into Hailey's sky blue eyes, searching for a modicum of a reason
behind why she gave up on us.
Tentatively, she breathed out, "I'm sorry."
I chuckled sadly, pushing away from her, the distance
instantly leaving me feeling cold and bitter. "You're sorry, I'm
sorry," I said flatly, continuing, "You know what? You're right.
There's really not a whole hell of a lot more to say, is there?" It was
more of a statement than a question, and I didn't give her time to answer.
"It doesn't matter...I'll be gone in the morning and..."
She abruptly cut me off. "But I thought you were
leaving today?"
I slumped my head between my shoulders, and looked towards
the office, replying, "Jim needs to talk to me about something in the
morning. I'm rolling out after."
Hailey shifted nervously, biting her lip. The same soft,
pink lips I had traced with my tongue dozens upon dozens of times. It was my
queue to leave, before I got sucked in even further. Without acknowledging her,
I turned and walked quickly out of the building, as I lit up a smoke to calm my
nerves, making my way towards my car.
Before I could get my hands on the car door handle, the
bar's back door wrenched open, and Hailey bolted out, running towards me,
stopping just inches in front of me, her breathing kicked up a notch from the
short jaunt. She breathed out, "Wait, Kellan...I don't want you to
go..." she paused before continuing, "Like this, I mean. I don't want
things to be like this between us," she stammered out, her eyes pleading
with me.
My mind was telling me to run like hell, as far and as fast
away from her as I could get. But she had my goddamn body on overdrive. I don't
know if it was the events of the day, my longing for her that I'd tried to bury
for so long, or her proximity, but I couldn't take another fucking minute
without tasting her.
I tossed my smoke, and in one smooth move, I grabbed her
face with both hands and crushed her lips to mine, forcing them open with my
tongue, and delving deep inside. She moaned low, going limp in my arms before
she wrapped her arms around my neck, threading her hands in my hair, and
digging her nails into my scalp. Our tongues tangled together in deep
exploration, desperate for each other, as we both fought for air. The kiss was
rough, urgent, and I ended it quickly, abruptly tearing my lips from hers to
peer into her hazy eyes as I said, "You made your bed. Now you have to lie
in it."
I climbed into my car, revved the engine, and spun out of
the parking lot, watching her in my rearview mirror; leaving her standing alone
and in shock, as her eyes went wide in confusion, and her fingers flew to her
swollen lips. I quickly cranked up the volume on my stereo as "Jesus
Christ" by Brand New streamed through my speakers.
******
Hailey
Oh, God. I needed to talk to someone. No, I needed to be
alone. No- I needed to talk to someone.
Shit!
I hurried inside and ran into in the kitchen, retrieving my
purse, and pulling out my phone, dialing the numbers furiously.
Damnit!
It went
straight to voicemail.
"Hey, I've been looking all over for you." I
jumped, unnerved at the sound of Georgia's upbeat, and yet concerned voice.
"Where've you been?" she questioned.
Tears began to sting the backs of my eyes, and my lips began
to quiver, as I stood silently staring at her, pleading with her not to
question me further. But I knew Georgia better than that. She'd never let me
off that easy.
I gripped the phone like a vice, as she came to stand in
front of me, placing her hands on my shoulders, and dipping her head to look me
in the eyes. "Hailey, Jesus, you're shaking like a leaf. I think you've
had enough for one day," she admonished. "I'll take you home."
I shook my head back and forth adamantly, saying, "I
can't go home. I need to see him." I held up the phone, as if making my
case. "He won't answer...he's not answering!" I blabbered out
emphatically.
Georgia dropped her hands to her side and stood up, peering
at me with confusion, as she said, "Honey, what happened? Who are you
trying to call? Michael?"
"
Wha?
...No!"
I blurted out, trying to shove past her, although I hadn't thought of calling
Michael until she'd mentioned it. At this point, it would probably be the wiser
thing to do, but reason never did factor in where Kellan and I were concerned.
"I need to see Kellan," I said concretely, throwing my purse over my
shoulder, and heading for the door.
Her heels clicked forcefully behind me, as she caught up to
me and spun me to face her, shooting out, "I'll call Michael
for
you, then, because you've obviously
lost your ever loving mind!"
I wrenched out of her grip, narrowing my eyes on her as I
replied, "Michael's my
professor
, Georgia, not my goddamn shrink."
"Well you obviously haven't been paying attention in
his class," she shot back.
"What in the hell's that supposed to mean?" I bit
out.
"What is it with you?" she questioned, her tone
harsh. "You have daddy issues or something?"
I rolled my eyes. "Stay out of it, Georgia."
"The last time I
stayed
out of it
," she gestured with air quotes, continuing, "He left
you in pieces. And who was there to help you put them back together again?
Huh?" She didn't give me time to respond before jumping back in. "Me!
Oh, and let's not forget your
husband
!"
she emphasized. "The man who
actually
loved you. Kellan breezes in here, and you're just going to forget
everything he did to you, and fall right back into his trap? You think I can't
see the way you two have been looking at each other? You both disgust me.
Jesus, Hailey...the body's still warm," she admonished.
Tears welled up in my eyes and a lump formed in the back of
my throat at the mention of Jordan. I pointed my finger at her, and gritted
out, "You don't know what you're talking about!"
"I know Kellan wouldn't have sacrificed his life for you!"
Hailey
Georgia promptly dismissed me and stomped off after her
tirade, leaving me standing alone with my jaw wide open, and confused as hell
at her cryptic words. I knew there would be no more talking to her about the
subject, especially where Kellan was concerned.
My mind was reeling after our altercation, my appetite was
nil, and I didn't think I could stand another sympathetic look or handshake
from anyone else for the day, so I tucked my tail between my legs, and headed
home.
Here I sit, once again in my empty house, feeling desolate,
alone, and a shell of a woman. Georgia was right; I should be ashamed of myself
for even allowing Kellan's presence to poison my mind. But apparently, my body
has a mind of it's own.
Stop it- what is
the matter with you?
No matter how many times I tried to reason with myself as to
how wrong it was to be thinking of Kellan, seeing him in person, after all
these years, had kicked up so many emotions I had fought to rid myself of for
so long.
Why did he have to come back now when I'm at my weakest? If
Jordan were here by my side, I wouldn't be giving Kellan the time of day. I
keep trying to remind myself of the fact that he left me with no goodbye, no
explanation- he just vanished. He had turned my whole world on its axis in an
instant, so easily, and without cause. And I have resented him for it every day
since he disappeared.
So why am I suddenly giving in to my disgraceful, selfish
wants? Why am I so quick to dismiss his transgressions against not only me, but
Jordan, as well? I guess I was foolish to think time heals all wounds.
It was so much easier to sweep my feelings under the rug
when he was so many miles away from me. It was my only saving grace. Luckily,
Kellan will be gone tomorrow, and I can get on with my life; a life devoid of
him. I did it once, and I can do it again. Distance. Distance is what I need.
******
Kellan
For the second time in the last two days, I gather up my
belongings, and stow them in my car, anxious to get Jim's 'talk' over with, and
get back to my life in Reno. The last few days have been exhausting, and I need
to get back to the normalcy of my everyday life. Being back in this town has
done nothing but stir up old ghosts I've worked years to wash away.
Firing up my engine, the lyrics of "All Signs Point to
Lauderdale" by A Day To Remember flow into my mind, echoing my thoughts,
and my need to get out of this town that reeks of death. The death of loved
ones, the death of friendship, the death of my love for Hailey. If I stayed
here any longer, I knew my own death was eminent; I'd die inside a little more
each day.
Arriving at the bar, I shut down my inner thoughts, and
tried to prepare myself for what I feared could only be more dismal news from
Jim.
Dreading this little 'chat', and hoping to get back on the
road as quickly as possible, I apprehensively approached Jim's office door. I
was kicking myself for not taking the opportunity to make off like a thief in
the night several hours ago. But the better part of me, if there is one, had
agreed to meet with him this morning. Being that I'd let him down in the past,
I would never be able to face him again if I took the coward's way out now; not
that I ever planned to see him again, but I was standing on principal alone.
Since the bar didn't actually open for a couple more hours, and knowing that I
wouldn't have to deal with prying eyes, it gave me some sort of solace at
least.
I didn't bother knocking on his door, as it stood slightly
ajar. It was a few minutes before nine, and I knew Jim would be expecting me. I
prided myself on being punctual.
Upon entering his office, Jim looked up from his paperwork
that he seemed to be poring over, and gave me a sincere smile, beaming,
"Just the man I wanted to see," as he waved me in and stood,
extending his hand to mine.
While I wasn't big on formalities, I returned his firm
handshake before saying gruffly, "Well, you've seen me. I'd like to say it
was nice seeing you, too, Jim...but under the circumstances..." my voice
trailed off.
"Yeah, goddamn shame we had to meet up again this
way," he mumbled, shaking his head back and forth.
I took a step towards the door as I said, firmly,
"Well, ya never know. Maybe we'll see each other down the road
sometime." I doubted it.
"Whoa, whoa, there kiddo. I didn't ask you to stop by
to give you my parting wishes," he said, abruptly halting my hasty exit.
Nodding his head towards the chair sitting directly across from him in front of
the desk, he added, "Take a seat. I have a proposition for you."
With one hand on the doorknob, I ran my other hand through
my hair, and blew out a frustrated sigh. Giving Jim a sidelong glance, I said
with annoyance, "Whatever you're selling, Jim, I'm not buying."
"Do me a favor and hear me out," he replied with
resignation.
After a few moments, I slowly made my way to the chair,
plopping myself in it, with little regard to propriety. I figured Jim wasn't
about to let me off the hook so easily, and I was beginning to feel caged in as
I wiped my sweaty palms on my jeans, before tucking my hands into the pockets
of my lightweight hoodie.
"Look, Jim, I need to get going; I've got a long drive,
so can we get this over with?" I grumbled.
Chuckling, Jim lumbered over to his chair, taking his time
to sit, and then tented his hands on top of his desk, as he looked at me
reverently with a slanted smile.
"I have a feeling I might be able to change your mind
about that, son," he said cryptically, as he continued to smile at me.
Disinterested, I broke my gaze from his, and stared towards
the door, replying, "If you think I'm spending one more day in this shit
kicking town, you're wasting your breath."
"Okay, okay," he conceded, throwing up his hands
in surrender. Expelling a long breath, he continued, "I've got some news,
and I wanted you to be the first know. And I'm trusting you to keep this
between us."
"Jesus Christ, Jim," I huffed out. "Don't you
think I have enough secrets on my shoulders right now?"
"I'm not asking you to keep secrets, Kellan. I'm just
asking for a little discretion until we can get this all sorted out," he
tried to explain.
"We're wasting daylight, here. Is there a point coming
up anytime soon?" I barked out impatiently.
Jim stood and began pacing the floor before his eyes met
mine again. He scrubbed his hand over his face before blurting out, "Gail
and I are moving." When I didn't respond, he continued, "Her aunt
lives up North in Bakerton. She's getting on in years, and Gail refuses to put
her in a home. We've decided to go stay with her."
"Great...send me a postcard," I said dismissively
as I stood to leave.
Quickly stepping in front of my path, he exclaimed,
"Wait! Give me a chance to get this out, will ya? You owe me that
much." Growing increasingly agitated by the moment, I stood silently,
waiting for him to continue. "I'm selling the bar," he said, looking
to me expectantly.
"Great," I shrugged. "You have a buyer?"
I mentally slapped myself, as I realized I was only dragging out my stay by
asking questions, when I honestly wasn't interested in the answers.
"I have someone in mind," he returned.
"Cool. Good luck with that, man. I hope everything
works out for you, Jim." I held out my hand for him to shake, as I
sidestepped him, latching onto the door handle as if it were a lifeline. I was
beginning to feel suffocated.
"I was hoping you'd stay and run the place," he
stated matter of factly.
I dropped my hand, as Jim never made a move to return my
gesture, and chuckled sarcastically. "No thanks. I have a job," I
stated with finality.
Blocking my exit, Jim jumped back in. "I'm not talking
about just a job, Kellan. I'm offering to sell you the place," he
confessed. Continuing to try to convince me, he went on to explain, "Look,
business is steady, and the staff is solid...well for the most part. I even
followed through on your suggestion, and hired your old next-door neighbor.
You'll be walking into a turnkey business, Kellan, and you know this place
inside and out. This is a no brainer." He looked at me anxiously with a
wide grin on his face.
After looking at him, momentarily dazed, I responded,
"Thanks for the opportunity, Jim, but I already told you I have a job. I
can't just up and shirk my responsibilities, pick up my life, and move half way
across the country."
"Ah, horseshit!" Jim bellowed. "You're
afraid."
Looking at him with indignation, I replied, "What the
fuck am I afraid of, huh?" He gave me a knowing look, and I continued to
counter him. "I told you...I have a job, a
life
, and it doesn't include..." I trailed off. Sighing, I
said, "Regardless...I don't have the money," hoping my plethora of
excuses would get him off my back. There was no way he could argue with that
aspect.
"That's not an issue," he stated flatly.
Shaking my head in confusion, I asked, "How in the fuck
is that not an issue? What the hell am I supposed to buy it with...my good
looks and charm?"
That got a laugh out of him before he honed back in on the
conversation. Raising his brows and waggling his finger at me, he said,
triumphantly, "See...I got your wheels turning in that head of yours. I'll
finance you...you can pay me back over time," he argued his case.
Clearly not getting through to him, despite my lack of
subtlety, I finally barked out, "For the last time...I'm not interested,
Jim."
His expression fell, as he relented, saying, "Well, if
you change your mind..."
"I won't," I stated harshly, pulling the door
open, and taking long, quick strides out of the bar.