Authors: Amelia Grace
“No. I’ve never been here before,”
he answered.
“Then why do the Café employees here seem to know you?
Look, for instance,” and then I indicated to a waiter to come to the table.
“Hi, do you know who this man is?”
I asked the waiter.
The attractive waiter smiled kindly at
me and then looked at Ben before he answered, carefully.
Ben sat
very
quietly, unusually quietly.
I
looked out of the corner of my eye, trying to read the body language and glances exchanged between them.
“No, I believe that I do not know this man. Should I ?” he replied.
“Thank-you,” I said shaking my head as the waiter politely nodded his head and left the table.
“I didn’t believe him you know,”
I informed Ben.
“Mmm, and why is that?”
“You were way too quiet as I asked the waiter the question. And then there were the exchanges of glances between you, and as he denied knowing you, I felt you relax,”
I explained.
Ben
looked at the table. I needed him to tell me the truth. I was starting to panic at the thought of untruths, and being mislead.
He looked out over the ocean, and then over towards to storm clouds and back to
my face.
“Okay, you’re right, in a way. The waiter doesn’t know me in person, and we have never met before because I have never been to this island before. It truly is the first time that I have come here. The waiter, however is familiar with my face, because my Gran, you remember, she used to own the flower shop, well, she owns this resort. All of her grandchildren’s photos are positioned throughout the resort facilities. So, although this is my first time being here, I think that the staff sort of feel like they do know me because of the photos.”
“And the beach house with no furniture?”
I enquired.
“It’s a gift. Gran gave all of her grandchildren a beach house and a means of transport to get around this island. The first time that you entered the house, was the first time that I had ever entered the house. Gran gave us the beach houses about three years ago. I have just never had the time to make it over to here. But it was the first thing that I thought of when I knew I had to take you away from Grandy’s house. And what’s even more perfect is, it needs interior decorating – furniture, paintings, kitchen stuff, you know, we need to make it a home, instead of a house….
Cate, there is no one better than you to complete our home. Will you help me in filling it with furniture and other knick knacks?” requested Ben.
I
smiled. I focused on his use of the words – our home. The words resonated musically in my ears. Our future was starting to sound like forever. It was all I had ever dreamed of since I had met Ben.
He
smiled back at me.
The r
umbling thunder became louder as we dined, but Ben was determined to have some chocolate mud cake and ice-cream for dessert before we left the café.
“You know
Cate, in Une Autre Terre, they have no sweets like ours here. Everything comes from the ground, the trees and the ocean. This would be an absolute indulgence to them. We are so spoiled here with our fine dining.”
As
he savored every mouthful of his dessert, he watched me devour mine. I was glad to have my appetite back. I knew that I had lost far too much weight in his absence.
Alerted, Ben and
I both looked up toward the heavens at the same time. The air around us had suddenly become still. We both knew what this change in the air meant – the storm was very near, nearer than we realized.
Quickly
we both arose from the table and fled, running to the motorcycle, me giggling with laughter. As we rode along the tree lined road towards Ben’s beach house, the clouds released the heavy rain, saturating us on the motorcycle. It was very dark along the winding road, but it was illuminated frequently by the bright flashes of lightning.
I
held on tightly to Ben, feeling exhilarated as I could feel the wind and rain on my face. My high feelings were intensified by the element of danger in riding on the motorcycle in a storm with the driving rain. But, I held onto Ben, my hero. He had saved me from a lifetime of depth and despair.
Running to the porch entry of the beach house,
we stopped as an ear splitting clap of thunder echoed and rumbled around us.
Ben looked at
me, soaked from top to bottom from the rain. My clothes clung revealingly to my body. I saw Ben breathe in deeply, and then look away.
Ben was drenching wet too, and very desirable.
I slowly took three steps towards him, enjoying every millisecond of feelings of longing for him.
He
remained still. I knew that he was fighting himself - the manly urges that he felt for me. He had made a promise to me. He had to be the strong one. Yet he remained still, breathing shallowly as I came closer to him.
I
looked deeply into his eyes as I bought my face closer to his. My hand gently caressed his chest and neck and then to the side of his face. I slowly brought my eager lips to his.
He
remained still, but I could see him fighting for control.
Our
kiss was light and gentle at first, but then became deep and passionate. I groaned as I let my feelings overtake my mind. I loved him so deeply, and my head started to spin.
Then, a
ll of a sudden, the house was lit up with the headlights of a car and the repeated honking of a horn.
We
parted from our passion and turned to see Ben’s brother and his wife excitedly running from the car.
Ben’s eyes widened in shock and embarrassment
, we had been caught in a very private embrace. He gently pushed me behind him. I was glad. I didn’t want his brother or his sister-in-law to see my body through my wet clinging clothes.
“Ben!” they both yelled at the same time, while running through the rain towards him. “When did you get in? We didn’t even know that you would be here. It is soooo good to see you again, and you too
Cate!”
“Michael, wow…. You took me by surprise. We only got in today, late. How are you both? You guys look great! How did you know I was here?”
Ben asked.
“Small
Island, news travels real fast!” replied Michael.
“Michael, I don’t mean to be rude, but, we’re both soaking wet and need to get changed. And you should really go to your beach house while you can in this storm. They’re predicting hail – it’ll damage your car. How about we get together in the next few days?” Ben commented, manipulating the conversation to brush off the visitors quickly.
I was standing behind Ben shivering. I was wet, and the strong wind from the storm was making me cold. Michael’s eyes shifted to me.
“That would be perfect Ben, and, thanks for the warning with the storm. If you go to the lobby of the resort tomorrow, you will find out where our beach house is. We would love to have you around big brother!”
“Good. It’s a done deal then…continued tomorrow!” Ben said enthusiastically, glad to be getting rid of his brothers presence.
Then
Ben turned to find me shivering, my lips with a blue tinge. He wrapped his warm body around me and unlocked the door and led me to the bathroom to have a warm shower. Then he went and prepared a hot cup of tea for us both, after removing his soaking clothes and wrapping a towel around himself.
I
was so grateful for the warmth of the shower. I had felt chilled to the bone waiting for Michael and his wife to leave. I also felt very disappointed that my passion with Ben had been extinguished. But I knew that it was for the best. I was about to lose control.
I
put on my summer nightwear that I had packed, and walked to the kitchen to find Ben. The pouring rain on the metal roof was a joy to my ears. How I loved the sound of rain falling on the roof, on the trees, dripping and whooshing.
Ben smiled shyly at
me when he saw me approaching in my short summer pajamas. I wondered if I should have packed different pajamas.
He handed
me a cup of hot tea, and I sipped it slowly, in silence, enjoying the activity of the storm outside.
After a
short while, I walked over to the french doors to look out at the beach. I watched the powerful flashes of lightning, and felt the vibrating sounds of the loud thunder, as they traveled through my body. It was the perfect way to start my holiday with Ben – at the beach, with a night time storm. Nothing could be better, except…….
Ben
had quietly walked over behind me and gently put his arms around me. I closed my eyes and relaxed my body into his feeling happy and safe.
“I love you,” Ben whispered, “let’s go to bed.”
I turned to face him, worried. Night time terrified me. It was when the nightmares would come.
“Hold me Ben. I need to feel your arms around me. I need to hear your heart beating. I need to feel your breathe on my head.”
Ben drew me close to him, and held me tenderly. I smelled his scent, and felt his strong protective body against mine.
Again he whispered, “let’s go to bed.” And then took
me by the hand and led me to the bedroom.
Defenses Down
The house remained dark
, except for the brilliant flashes of lightning that lit our way as we walked. I followed Ben closely, holding his hand. He led me through the great room with the ridiculously high cupola, to the main bedroom that overlooked the beach.
I
t was as dark as a moonless night. But then, a great flash of lightning lit the entire room revealing its nothingness of furniture.
Then a less powerful second flash of prolonged lightning revealed a queen size mattress lying on the timber floor. It had been made up in white sheets and white pillows. It faced the french doors that led out to the back
terrace. To the right of the mattress were three timber windows that held a view to the beach and the ocean beyond.
Ben stopped
and turned to me. My eyes had adjusted to the darkness now and I could just see him in the muted light. His face was intense, absorbing me.
I
stopped inches from him and put my hands onto his bare muscular chest, and melted into his eyes.
He
moved his hand lightly up to my neck and brushed his fingers along my jaw line, before he brought his lips to mine, kissing me lightly, and briefly.
But a
s Ben pulled himself away from our kiss, I placed my hand behind his head and pulled his lips back to mine. I kissed him deeply before I pulled away momentarily.
“Ben…” I whispered.
And then Ben walked away. Backwards towards the windows, his hands over his face which was pained, and then he turned and put his hands behind his head, looking out into the heavy rain.
I
stood shocked and motionless, as I watched him. I could see how difficult I had made it for him. The last thing that I wanted to do was to push him away from me. Was it my fault that he had walked away?
In silence
, I walked over to him, and hugged him from behind, hoping that he wasn’t angry with me. I placed my head against his back and gave him a single kiss against his neck. I could hear him breathing heavily, and I could feel the stress in his body as he was fighting to gain control of his feelings.
“Ben, I’m sorry,”
I whispered.
“No
Cate…I’m sorry. My whole body becomes overcome with a powerful urge to become one with you Cate. It is extremely hard to fight.” He hung his head and breathed deeply, “I made a promise to you a long time ago, and I cannot break that promise – no matter what the circumstances. I will feel like a weak man if I cave in and break our promise. I want you to hold me up on that pedestal that you have built for me for eternity. I never want to let you down Cate. I love you,“ he said, his whispered voice breaking with emotion.
“And I love you, madly and deeply,”
I whispered, my heart overflowing with love and adoration for him.
As the rain continued to pour down, and the lightning flashed and the thunder rumbled,
I stood with my arms wrapped around him. Slowly, I could feel him starting to relax. He turned to me and kissed me lightly on the lips.
And I
understood. I understood perfectly.
We
made our way to the bed that lay on the timber floor. I rolled onto my side, and watched the lightning out of the windows, and Ben lay behind me, cocooning me.
I
was exhausted. The day had so many emotional elements entwined into it. It had been truly exhilarating. I prayed that my days of self-pity and deep depression were gone, and I vowed never to return to that dark state of being no matter what happened. Then I fell into a deep peaceful sleep.