Flowers on the Mersey (10 page)

She looked in on the Entertainment – a girl singing, ‘I’m forever blowing bubbles’ – but there was no Daniel. She found him on the boat deck, leaning on the white-painted rail, gazing out over the dark sea. She took a deep breath to steady herself as he turned and looked at her. ‘Daniel, I’m sorry about last night. What you do is your business.’

‘Thanks.’ He was still smarting from her words. ‘Do you really mean that about not caring if you never saw Ireland again? Don’t you have any feelings for your birthplace?’

‘Of course I do. But my future’s in America now.’ She hesitated. ‘Yours could be, too. I don’t like thinking that you might be killed.’

He turned slowly. ‘No one can be completely immune from suffering and death. It’s all around us.’

‘That’s not quite the same.’

Daniel put his arm around her. ‘Don’t look so sad, Becky. Let’s forget about Ireland and America and live life while we’ve got it.’ He turned her towards him.

‘That’s easily said,’ she murmured. ‘But you want to live in Ireland. You’re like that Oisín in the legend.’

‘But you’re no princess.’ He kissed her neck. ‘You’re real, thank God.’ They kissed once, twice, and before long were back to where they had been the evening before, except this time no footsteps disturbed them. In an atmosphere of dark skies and slapping waves their passion for each other seemed at one with the elements.

She gasped as his tongue ran over her nipples and her fingers laced through his curly hair and held his head against her breast. With her other hand she pulled out his shirt and stroked his bare back. She wanted to be part of him just as she had been on the beach, and pressed against him.

A soft sigh escaped him. ‘Becky, love, do you know what you’re doing to me?’

‘Tell me,’ she whispered. ‘Tell me that you love me, that you want me.’

He lifted his head and gazed into her face. ‘I love you, I want you.’ His voice was husky. They kissed and she could feel the heavy thud of his heart against her bare breast as his hands took hold of hers and guided them to his trouser buttons. He nuzzled her neck and with an accelerated pulse and shaking
fingers, she forced the first three buttons through holes, brushing the swelling beneath with the tips of her fingers several times. Abruptly he pressed her hand so that she could not move. ‘Keep still. Let me calm down,’ he said against her ear.

‘What do you mean?’

A chuckle sounded in his throat. ‘It’s too nice.’

‘What is?’

‘What you’re doing.’ He took her hands away and held her at arm’s length. ‘I don’t know what we’re going to do. I want you, but we could end up in trouble.’

‘Can’t we get married?’ She struggled to get close to him again but he continued to hold her off.

‘It’s not that easy and you know it,’ he murmured. ‘I’ll have to do some thinking. It’s getting late. I’ll have to go.’

‘Already?’ She could not hide her disappointment.

He kissed her and she clung to him. He released her with obvious reluctance. ‘It’s time you were getting back or we’ll have your father breathing brimstone and fire.’

‘Shall I see you tomorrow?’

He nodded. ‘I’m on in the early hours but I’ll hope to see you here towards the end of the morning.’

They parted at the head of the companionway that led to her parents’ cabin. Rebekah began to think up excuses.

She was not far from the cabin when she collided
with a staggering Shaun, who stared at her from bleary eyes. Thinking that in his drunken state he had not recognised her, she would have passed without speaking but he dragged on her arm and stuttered, ‘Why don’t you leave my brother alone?’

‘I don’t think it has anything to do with you.’ Rebekah’s voice was curt. She made to pull away but he stumbled into her and she fell against the wall. Suddenly his hands and mouth seemed to be everywhere and she was slapping at him. ‘I’ll scream,’ she hissed, ‘if you don’t stop it!’

‘And wake everybody?’ he sneered, and rammed her against the wall.

She screamed.

A couple of doors opened and Shaun removed his hands as if she was a burning chestnut.

‘Rebekah!’ It was her father’s voice.

She turned on Shaun quickly. ‘Go! Or you’ll get what for!’

Her father had seen them and was hurrying along the corridor.

‘I’ll bloody get you,’ said Shaun, before making a stumbling retreat.

Her father would have pushed by her if Rebekah had not seized his arm. ‘Papa! A complete stranger, and he wouldn’t let me past.’

He wrenched his sleeve out of her grasp. ‘A stranger?’ he said sardonically. ‘I thought I recognised him as one of those damned O’Neill boys.’

She felt a chill of apprehension, realising her mistake in screaming. ‘How could it be?’ she said, her voice quivering. ‘You’ve got O’Neills on the brain, Papa!’

‘Don’t be impudent!’ His eyebrows hooded suspicious eyes. ‘I’ll check the lists – and if it is him, I’ll have something done. It’s a good job it’s not nine o’clock yet or you’d be in worse trouble. Now get into the cabin.’ He gave her a push that sent her stumbling along the passageway.

That night she dreamt of Trim Castle in Ireland where her father had taken her as a girl. It was large and forbidding and frightening. She was looking through an opening at the sea far below, knowing that Daniel had gone somewhere far away while she was locked in a tower. It was all her father’s fault and she had to get out before he came back. Suddenly the window wall vanished and she was airborne, flapping her arms as she sped over the sea, but there was someone behind her. That someone took on the shape of a banshee and her fear grew into an overwhelming panic. It would catch her and she would never see Daniel again!

Scared by her dream, Rebekah could hardly wait to meet Daniel the next day and she was halfway up the companionway to the boat deck far too early when she heard footsteps behind her.

Daniel took her hand. ‘I nearly bumped into your father. He came into the smoking saloon so I made a quick exit.’

‘Shaun wasn’t there?’ Her voice was strained.

‘He told me what happened,’ said Daniel, his expression suddenly vexed.

She felt certain his brother had not told him everything. ‘This morning Papa’s going to check the passenger list to see if you’re both on it,’ she said quietly.

‘He’ll find no trace of Shaun. I smuggled him aboard.’

‘Papa’s very determined.’

He nodded. ‘He’ll still have difficulty. I wish I’d left Shaun at home now. He’s always been trouble. I spent more time getting him out of fixes than myself when we were kids.’

‘I thought it was your older brothers who were the troublemakers?’

He grimaced. ‘They were, but Mam always said it was Daddy’s fault. When he got drunk he was like a mad hog. I remember kicking him back once when he hit me. I was about five, and he landed me such a clout that my ear swelled up and I couldn’t hear properly for days. It got so bad in the end that I was glad when he became ill and died.’

She was horrified. ‘Papa was never like that! It’s just lately that—’

‘He’s frightened and worried,’ interrupted Daniel in a positive voice. ‘He’s not young to be taking such a big step as emigrating.’

‘He doesn’t seem to be bothered about that,’ murmured Rebekah.

‘He wouldn’t tell you.’

‘No.’ She was silenced for a moment, then she murmured, ‘What will we do if he does find out you’re on the ship?’

‘He hasn’t yet. Let’s worry about it another day.’ He pulled her towards him and for a while there was no more talk.

They resumed talking about her father when some
people came up on deck. ‘If you weren’t a Catholic and a rebel, he might accept you,’ said Rebekah.

‘But I am,’ Daniel said emphatically.

She stared at him. ‘People do get round the religious thing. My parents did.’

‘Nobody’s ever done it in our family.’

‘There’s always a first time.’

Daniel shook his head at her. ‘Do you realise me mam would spin in her grave? She was always wanting me to settle down with a nice respectable Catholic girl, schooled by the nuns and as innocent as a newborn chick. In fact I know one in Liverpool. A friend of me cousin. She’d bear me numerous children, all to be raised as good, clean-living Catholics.’

Immediately Rebekah felt threatened. ‘What’s this girl’s name?’

‘Marie. She’s got the softest brown hair and goes to mass every day.’ His eyes twinkled. ‘She knits me socks and prays that I’ll be a reformed character. Me cousin Maureen told me that’s so.’

‘Her prayers don’t seem to be working very well,’ said Rebekah, raising her eyebrows. ‘Have you kissed her?’

‘Only the once.’

‘Oh?’

‘She didn’t take to it like you. All screwed up for it she was. It was like kissing a prune. But I’m sure she’d make a faithful, dutiful wife.’

‘She sounds too good to be true.’

‘Sure, and she’s an angel.’

Rebekah looked him squarely in the face. ‘Then she should be in Heaven – with your mother, if she’s the kind of girl she wants.’

He shook his head at her in mock reproof. ‘If I had any sense and was a good, clean-living Catholic, she’s the girl I should think of marrying. But when a man’s in love it’s not clean living he’s thinking about. It’s kissing and cuddling, and—’ His look said the rest and she could only agree with him because inside she had that physical ache for him again. She tried not to think about the future but went into his arms.

It was on the way down the companionway that they met Rebekah’s mother going up. She wished desperately that she could have escaped with the barest, ‘Hello, Mama.’ And she did press Daniel’s arm, hoping he would take the hint and go ahead, but he did not.

‘I’ve been wondering where you were,’ said her mother, addressing Rebekah, but staring at Daniel.

‘I’m hoping you won’t mind my walking with your daughter?’ he said, taking off his cap. ‘It’s nice and fresh on the boat deck. Unlike the engine room.’ He held out a hand. ‘I’m—’

‘This is – Willie Smith, Mama,’ interrupted Rebekah. ‘I met him at the Entertainment. He asked me to walk round the deck with him.’

Her mother shook Daniel’s hand. ‘How do you do, Mr Smith?’

‘Very well, thank you.’ He avoided looking at Rebekah and she did not look at him as he exerted his charm. ‘And yourself, Missus? Miss Rhoades was telling me that you haven’t been well.’

‘I’m much better, thank you.’

‘I’m pleased to hear that. If you aren’t minding, I’ll be leaving Miss Rhoades with you as I’m on duty within the half hour. It’s been nice meeting you.’ He looked in Rebekah’s direction. ‘I enjoyed our walk.’ She murmured polite agreement and did not watch him go.

‘A nice-looking and polite young man, but not Mr Eaton,’ said her mother calmly.

‘I never said I’d been with Mr Eaton.’ Rebekah fiddled with her glove, and looked down the steps.

‘So you didn’t. Shall we see if the air is still fresh on the boat deck?’ Her mother ascended the stairs.

Rebekah followed her. ‘Where’s Papa?’

Her mother ignored her question. ‘I presume that you were with Mr Smith last evening?’

Rebekah was about to tell a lie but changed her mind. What purpose would it serve. ‘Yes, Mama.’

‘Your father’s worked up about some young man.’

‘Mr Eaton?’ Rebekah picked a piece of cotton from her sleeve.

Her mother looked at her severely. ‘I was your
age once, Becky. I saw the way the pair of you didn’t look at each other.’

Rebekah dropped the thread. ‘Didn’t look at each other?’

‘Yes! It’s in case you give anything away. If two people like each other, they can’t easily hide it. They try. How your father and I tried to keep it from our Esther and my father!’

‘Mama—’ began Rebekah.

‘I won’t say don’t see him,’ interrupted her mother, clasping her hands. ‘In fact, I won’t even say bring him to meet your father.’

‘I wouldn’t,’ said Rebekah quietly. ‘We’ve made no arrangements. He has duties.’

‘Duties.’ Her mother smiled. ‘Of course, he’s a sailor. I used to adore sailors. We had plenty of them coming into our shop, trying to sell us things. The ones I met always had exciting tales to tell. The only trouble was that our Esther would always hover. But he seems a decent enough young man. Irish blood somewhere, I think.’

‘He has family in Liverpool,’ said Rebekah quickly.

‘Don’t half the Irish?’ Sarah hesitated. ‘Anyway, next time you see him, if it’s evening have him escort you to our cabin. That way you’ll be safe from drunkards. Now let’s go and have some of that fresh air.

She put her hand through Rebekah’s arm and urged her out on deck, changing the subject to
talk of apartments in New York. Rebekah let her talk flow over her, trying not to worry whether her mother would tell her father about the meeting with Daniel.

‘Well, Becky, there aren’t any O’Neills down on the passenger list,’ said her father, at the lunch table. ‘But don’t be thinking I’ve given up. They could be using a different name. Or they could be crew working as deckhands.’

Trust her father to put them down as deckhands, thought Rebecca mutinously, aware of her mother’s gaze.

‘Who are these O’Neills, Adam?’ asked Sarah.

‘Bloody rebels.’ he muttered, putting down his teacup.

‘Language, Adam,’ murmured Rebekah’s mother. ‘What would rebels be doing on a ship going to America?’

‘Their president’s in America. They could be taking messages.’

His wife’s hand slackened on her fork. ‘I don’t think that’s going to affect us, Adam. Shall we talk of something else.’

He changed the subject and Rebekah breathed easier. She caught Brigid’s eye but the Liverpudlian remained silent and later followed her out of the dining room. ‘I take it,’ she said, ‘that the fella you told me about, and one of the O’Neills yer dad mentioned, are one and the same person?’

Rebekah leant on the rail, and put her chin in her hand. ‘How did you guess?’

‘I know a Daniel O’Neill.’ Brigid’s elbow nudged hers. ‘His auntie lives in our street.’

‘That’s a coincidence,’ said Rebekah, not sure whether she was pleased or not that Brigid should know Daniel.

‘They happen. He’s a nice bloke. Friendly like. No sides.’

Rebekah sighed. ‘We bumped into my mother and I wanted him to make a quick exit, but he didn’t budge and had to go and be nice to her. I’m worried in case she tells Papa.’

‘I presume he didn’t use his own name.’

‘I introduced him as Willie Smith.’

‘Smith? Real original.’

Rebekah allowed herself a smile. ‘It was the best I could do on the spur of the moment.’

‘What are yer going to do? Yer dad seems pretty determined to find Danny.’

‘I know.’ Rebekah bit on a nail. ‘I’ll have to wait and see.’

‘It might be best if you stopped seeing him.’

Rebekah’s eyes clouded and she took her finger out of her mouth. ‘I can’t! I just can’t! Even if Papa beat me—’ The words were low and intense.

Brigid’s expression was concerned. ‘I’d think about it if I were you, luv.’

‘I already have,’ said Rebekah, and walked away
to make a fruitless search of the decks for Daniel.

Supper passed without incident and she decided after listening to Brigid’s talk about the Entertainment and the dancing that followed, she might as well go along and see what went on. She changed into a new skirt and the eau-de-Nil crêpe-de-Chine blouse her aunt had bought her. On her way in she met Daniel, who immediately led her outside.

‘Why did you have to interrupt me when I was talking to your mother?’ he demanded.

‘I thought—’

‘I know what you thought.’ He pulled her hand through his arm. ‘If you’d waited for me to finish, Becky love, you’d have heard me tell your mother that my name was Peter Riley. You saying Smith complicates things. There isn’t one on this ship.’

‘I’m sorry. Papa said that you might be going under another name, and that you could be members of the crew! He’s not going to give up, Daniel.’

‘Well, he’s not going to find an O’Neill amongst the crew.’

‘If he gets at the truth—’ Her expression clouded.

The corners of his mouth tightened. ‘I don’t want you getting hurt because of me.’

‘He mightn’t hit me,’ she said with difficulty. ‘He could just try and make sure that I don’t see you again.’

He nodded. ‘I’d prefer that.’

‘You would?’

‘There’s always a way round things. Didn’t I get on this ship?’ He pulled her into the shadows and into his arms.

Rebekah held him tightly, still scared. ‘It’ll be New York soon and Papa’ll make sure he keeps me away from you.’

‘I’ll think of something.’

She hoped he could but was still worried. She kissed him with a desperation she had never felt before.

Their kisses became more passionate, grew wilder, and his hands began to roam her body. He unbuttoned her blouse and eased the garment down to her waist, flicking off the straps of her underskirt. She looked into his face and it was soft with desire. She felt a quivering sensation in her stomach and a rush of anticipation. His mouth was on her neck, throat, breasts, covering her with little kisses, sending tremors through her. She felt like a volcano on the simmer and was aware that he was trembling with desire too.

Then unexpectedly he drew away and turned to the boat on their right. He climbed up and began to unfasten its covering, threw it back and pulled her up and inside the boat.

It was not the most comfortable place she had ever been in, but she rid herself of her clothes. Her breasts tingled as they brushed his bare chest and then his mouth was fastened on hers again and he began to explore and caress her all over as he had done once before. They moved together as if their
bodies were moulded out of the same clay and she held on to him with all her strength. When she finally arched against him, he kissed her to drown the cry that rose in her throat and then withdrew quickly, moaning.

Afterwards they lay in each other’s arms. ‘We can’t risk that again, Becky love,’ murmured Daniel. ‘It was a near thing. I wouldn’t shame you.’

‘It might mean that they would have to let us marry.’

A sharp laugh escaped him. ‘He’d lock you away first. It’s not going to be easy.’

‘I know.’

‘I have to go back to Ireland.’

‘I’ll go with you.’ She hesitated. ‘There or Liverpool.’

‘You still don’t want to go back to Ireland.’ His voice suddenly sounded weary.

‘I’ll go wherever you want me to.’

He sighed and sat up. ‘I should give you up.’

‘But you won’t?’ There was a note of panic in her voice.

‘Not if I can help it,’ he said soothingly.

They kissed and got out of the boat. He fastened the cover back. His hand caressed the side of her face. ‘I love you, Becky.’ He kissed her again. ‘I’ve got to go. I’m on duty soon. I’ll see you early tomorrow evening. Perhaps we can go dancing? It would be more sensible.’

She nodded and they parted.

Rebekah had hoped that her father might still be in the smoking saloon when she returned to the cabin but he was lying on his bunk, fully dressed, filing his nails.

‘Where were you, miss, when I looked in on the Entertainment?’

‘What time was that?’ She slipped off her jacket and placed it on the top spare bunk.

‘It doesn’t matter what time it was, you weren’t there. With Mr Smith, were you, on the boat deck?’

She glanced quickly at her mother, who did not lift her eyes from her book, but Rebekah could tell from the stiff way she held her shoulders that she was no longer reading. She moistened her mouth. ‘I was with Mr Smith. He’s good company.’

‘He isn’t on any of the lists!’ Her father flung the nail file on the bed and sat up. ‘Perhaps it was Mr Jones? Maybe Mr Riley or Mr Merriman? Then again it might be none of them but Shaun O’Neill’s brother!’

Rebekah cleared her throat. ‘I thought you said there were no O’Neills on this ship?’