Following Your Heart (29 page)

A dim light came on in the house, and he watched for a long moment before walking toward the doorway. Anna met him at the front door, holding her robe shut with one hand, a kerosene lamp in the other. Her long hair spilled out from under her night
kapp
and hung over her shoulders.

“What are you up for?” he asked, stepping inside.

“I could ask you the same,” she said. “But I assume it's because you're troubled like I am. I just had an awful dream.”

“Come,” he said, “dreams are not always true. We must not let them bother us. It is
Da Hah
alone who remains ever faithful and true.”

“But does He not speak through dreams?” she asked. “I believe He does, and I believe you need to hear this one.”

“Come, let us go into the bedroom,” he said. “Lest we awaken someone.”

Sitting down on the bed he waited while she climbed under the covers.

“It was an awful thing,” she said. “It was all rushed together like dreams are, but yet it all seemed so clear. I saw the wedding right after the baptism. Poor Yost Byler standing there in his new suit, his heart full of joy. Teresa took his hand and made her promises. I saw Yost take her home, and she was placing food on the table for him. You should have seen how happy Yost looked.

“Then I saw the children—two, maybe three. They were all
gut
-looking children, and Yost was so happy. And Teresa looked happy from what I could tell. Then I saw Teresa leaving, just like that. Running down the road, leaving the children, leaving Yost, leaving the house they lived in. She left everything. That's so unlike her, Menno. Why would I have such a dream?”

“I don't know,” he said. “But dreams are not always to be trusted.”

“Is it just my fears talking?” she asked, nestling under the quilt. “Teresa wouldn't do something like that. I don't think so anyway. What do you think?”

“
Yah
, perhaps it is just your fears,” he said. “I don't think she would do such a thing either.”

They both settled themselves and moments later Anna's even breathing filled the room. But Menno stayed awake, staring at the ceiling until the moon rose, flooding the world outside the bedroom window with white light. Eventually he drifted off, awakening to the loud clanging of the alarm clock. The first light of dawn was already written in the sky.

M
enno finished his chores after breakfast, leaving the harnessing of the horse till the last minute. The day had dawned clear, without a cloud in the sky. He really ought to be out in the fields finishing the spring plowing, but he had promised. The trip to Deacon Ray's place must be undertaken today.

Teresa was hanging out the first load of wash when he led Toby out of the barn. She smiled and waved, nearly losing the wooden pins she held in her mouth. How like an Amish woman the girl was becoming, and so determined to make a go of things. The least he could do was put in a
gut
word for her with Deacon Ray. And there might even be more he could do, but that would have to wait. By now James would surely have spoken with his
daett
, and this visit might well be expected.

With the horse fastened to the buggy shafts, he swung the lines in through the storm window and climbed in.

Teresa gave him another wave as he drove by the wash line. She shouted, “Have a good trip now!”

“Don't work too hard,” he hollered back. Once out on the road, he slapped the reins, pushing Toby to a faster pace. Who knew how long this conversation might take, and he needed to get back to his farmwork. In the meantime, he might as well lean back and enjoy the ride. Not often did he get a chance to travel alone.
Mamm
and Susan were usually along on Sunday mornings, and during the week any good farmer stayed close to home. There was so much work on any farm in the community.

Menno sighed. He needed help around the place, but from the looks of things, Susan didn't plan to patch up her differences with Thomas anytime soon. He might as well look for a hired hand, but those were difficult to find. Young married men with their need to support growing families wanted to run the whole place and move into the main house. Any unmarried farm boys were usually kept busy on their own
daetts'
farms. Perhaps he could mention his need to Deacon Ray this morning. The man visited many Amish communities in his travels with Bishop Henry.

Menno waved as he passed Emery Yoder's wife traveling the other way. She must be going down to Livonia to the Dutch Barn for shopping. A trip into Salem would usually require a much earlier start.

In the open fields to the west, a team of horses plowed the land, the black soil rolling over in a steady stream as one of the Esh boys handled the reins. Menno leaned out of the buggy, ready to wave, but the intent gaze of the driver never came his direction. Now there was a true farmer at heart, intent and eager at his work. Perhaps Ezra would allow his son to take a job away from home? Menno settled into the buggy seat again, pondering the thought. It was unlikely. Ezra needed all three of his sons for the nearly 200 acres the family owned. Besides that, they raised garden produce to sell to
Englisha
customers. There was not a chance Ezra would allow one of his sons to work for another farmer. And soon the boy would have a girlfriend, be ready to marry, and want to move somewhere on his own farm.

Why not ask Ezra if he knows of someone? It could do no harm. And there was Ezra walking out of his barn right now. Menno slowed down and pulled into the driveway.

“
Gut
morning,” Ezra greeted, approaching the buggy with a ready smile. “What brings you out on the road this morning?”

Menno pushed open the buggy door and leaned his head out. There was no reason to tell Ezra where he was going and why.

“Saw your boy out plowing,” Menno said, motioning toward the field with a tilt of his head. “Mighty fine young boys you have coming up there. Any chance you have a spare one?”

Ezra laughed. “I think you know the answer to that question.”

“That's what I thought,” Menno said. “Any chance you know of a young man looking for farmwork? I sure could use one come spring. I'm not getting any younger these days.”

“No change between Susan and Thomas?” Ezra asked, leaning against the buggy wheel.

Menno shook his head. “And even if there was, they wouldn't get married until the fall.”

“I'll ask around,” Ezra said. “You never know.”

“Good men available to work are hard to find,” Menno said. “Thanks. If nothing else, I can perhaps prime the pump. Get a hired hand while the girl makes up her mind.”

Ezra stepped back with a wave as Menno pulled out of the driveway. He drove down the road deep in thought, approaching Deacon Ray's farm ten minutes or so later. Menno pushed his hat back on his forehead, scanning the fields. If Deacon Ray was out working, he could save time by tying up along the fence and walking out to him. No team of horses was in the fields though, so Menno kept going to the driveway. Pulling in, he caught sight of Deacon Ray peering out of the barn window.

The deacon waved, and Menno turned his horse in that direction, coming to a stop beside the barn. Climbing down, Menno tied up and pushed open the barn door.

“
Gut
morning,” Deacon Ray greeted, leaning on his pitchfork. “I'm afraid you're catching me a little late at my chores. James ran into Salem early this morning to get a part for the disk so I'm still at them without his help.”

“At least you have your plowing done.” Menno tried to smile, pulling his hat tighter on his head. “I've still got mine to finish, so I'll try not to keep you long.”

“I'm not surprised you've come over,” Deacon Ray said, taking a seat on a hay bale. “Sit down, Menno, as this might take a while, and we're both old men.”

“So did James tell you about Sunday night?” Menno asked. “I thought he might.”

“
Yah
, your thinking would be correct,” Deacon Ray said. “We had quite a going over on the subject when he arrived home. I don't think we got to bed until after midnight. I've not been up that late since my days of taking Esther home from the hymn singings.”

“I know what you mean,” Menno said. “I've been quite troubled myself. I promised Anna and the girls I'd come over to speak with you.”

“You won't be trying to bend my mind, Menno?” Deacon Ray asked, shifting on the straw bale.

“Not really,” Menno said, “as I know it doesn't bend easily, but I wanted first of all to make it clear that this was none of Teresa's doing.”

“So you're sticking up for her?” Deacon Ray asked.

“It's the way things are,” Menno said. “It's not just sticking up for a person when it's the truth.”

“So you're that certain of the matter?” Deacon Ray asked.

“
Yah
,” Menno said. “What does James say about it?”

“Pretty much what the girl said, I suppose,” Deacon Ray said. “He had his feelings hurt that she turned him down. I can't imagine what got into the boy to take such a thing upon himself.”

“He's your son; maybe he thought he had special privileges,” Menno said.

Deacon Ray laughed. “I doubt if Bishop Henry will be taking excommunication up over this matter.”

Menno smiled. “Not likely, but you know that others will start thinking the same thing soon. It's bound to happen. What do you think gave James the nerve to challenge you in the first place?”

“The boy's got a hard skull,” Deacon Ray said. “And I won't be changing my mind just because the community starts asking questions. Teresa comes from outside. We can't change that fact. We've been supportive of her more than we probably should already. Right now I'm wishing I'd never listened to Yost's wild idea that evening.”

“Is James interested in Teresa?” Menno asked. “Or just feeling sorry for her?”

Deacon Ray picked a straw out of the bale, chewing long on the stem. “It's hard to tell with that boy. He's never been able to settle down with any girl. I don't know how many girls he's taken home, and he always has some reason not to ask them home again. Maybe he sees something different in Teresa, something
Englisha
, something forbidden. You know how that can pull on a man's heart.”

Menno studied the straw-strewn barn floor. “So what do you plan to do if he continues giving Teresa attention? What am I supposed to tell her to do?”

“I am much troubled about the situation,” Deacon Ray admitted. “I am treating James like any other boy, exactly as if he were not my son. But James made some points that's got me to thinking.”

“Yah?”
Menno inquired, waiting patiently as silence settled between them.

Deacon Ray cleared his throat. “James asked if I have never done anything that needed forgiveness. He asked if
Da Hah
now keeps me forever in His debt because of it. He claims the girl is doing all of this to give her son a better life than she had, that she is willing to sacrifice her own happiness by marrying Yost Byler to accomplish this. He said that few of our own people would be willing to submit to such a thing.”

“And do you believe this to be true?” Menno asked.

Deacon Ray looked at him. “I should be asking you that question. She lives in your house.”

“Teresa is a decent girl,” Menno finally said. “And she is learning our ways quickly. From what Susan says, James is speaking the truth.”

“I wish to know how you feel, Menno. Please answer me carefully,” Deacon Ray said. “You know what will happen if we're wrong on this. Such a girl could cause much sorrow and unhappiness in the community. How many
Englisha
girls have ever joined this community, especially ones with a child and no husband?”

“I see that your mind has gone in much the same directions as mine,” Menno said. “And I am quite thankful I don't have the leadership of the community to think about.”

“You can thank
Da Hah
each day for such a gift, Menno,” Deacon Ray said. “The burden of the church lies heavy on my shoulders. But you have not told me yet what you think about this.”