For The Least Of These (13 page)

“No. I’ve got some Cheese Nips and a Dr. Pepper. If you want anything else, you are out of luck.”

“Never mind. I wish I could brush my teeth. My mouth tastes yucky.”

“Why don’t I walk back to your room and see if I can get your toothbrush? Just sit right there. I don’t want you to fall and hurt yourself.”

“Yes, sir,” I said and saluted Adam. “I’ll be a good girl until you get back.”

He walked out the door and I started looking around the room. There wasn’t much to see in the sitting room, so I went into one of the bedrooms. There was a guitar leaning against the wall, so I guessed that this room was Adam’s. I started to feel lightheaded again, so I decided I’d better get back to the sofa. But then again, the bed looked very comfortable, and I might fall if I walked all the way back into the other room. Instead, I fell back on the bed.

Adam was saying softly, “Come on; wake up. I found you a toothbrush.”

I opened my eyes and Adam was leaning over me gently shaking my shoulder. He looked a little flushed, and then I realized that I was asleep on his bed. He must have thought that I was waiting for him. I jumped up and started apologizing.

“It’s okay,” he was saying. “There’s no need to apologize. I know you must have been tired. I’m not upset.” His words didn’t match his face. He was upset about something.

I grabbed the toothbrush out of his hand and rushed into the bathroom. He seemed to be following me, but I shut the door. Standing in front of the sink, I was horrified at the image staring back at me from the mirror. My hair was a tangled mess and my eyes were red and puffy. I probably looked worse now than I had with red paint all over me. I decided that the only solution was for me to take another shower.

While I waited for the water to heat up, I decided to brush my teeth. I noticed that the toothbrush wasn’t mine, and I remembered that my toothbrush was in Pensacola. Still, this one looked new and clean, so I supposed I would use it anyway. After all, it couldn’t taste as bad as the throw-up in my mouth. I also brushed my hair with a brush I found on the sink and I undressed. During this time, Adam called my name a few times, but I ignored him. Finally, I stepped into the shower and let the warm water engulf me for a while. My shoulders were aching a little bit, but the rest of my body had stopped being painful.

When I got out of the shower, I felt a little less flighty. I also felt clean and refreshed. I quickly realized that I didn’t have any clean clothes to put on and I started to get flustered. Especially since my puke scented clothes had vanished. Then I noticed a shirt and a pair of sweat pants hanging on the back of the door. The shirt was a light blue T-shirt and the sweats were navy blue. I guessed that they were Adam’s and that they would never fit me. But I tried them on anyway, and, surprisingly, both fit. I brushed my long b
londe hair back from my face and then started into the other room.

Adam was waiting right outside. He still looked flushed for some reason. “I was worried about you,” he said. “I was afraid you might fall in the tub.”

“No, I’m feeling more surefooted now that I’ve had a shower. Oh, and thanks for the outfit.”

“Oh, that. It’s just my slouchy clothes. I thought you might be comfortable in them.”

“Has Alicia finished her mysterious errand, or whatever the heck she was doing?”

“Not yet,” he replied.

I sat down on the sofa and Adam joined me. “What time is it anyway?”

“
Late enough that we should be going to sleep soon.”

“
I guess you’re right. How long do you think Alicia is going to need? Did she tell you? She did let you in to get my toothbrush…”

“No, but it might be a while. You might want to think about staying here tonight.”

The thought of staying all night in Adam’s room should have brought back my longing for Rick. Instead, I thought it sounded heavenly. Rick had been such a jerk at the beach, and I was really mad with him. Adam, on the other hand, had been wonderful to me the entire night. So wonderful, I thought, that he will never invite me to sleep in his bed.

“I wouldn’t want to impose,” I said quickly. “Maybe I should call Alicia and tell her to hurry up.”

“Brandy, I want you to stay,” he said. Then he leaned over and started kissing me. It was undoubtedly the most passionate kiss I had ever shared with any man. At that moment, all I wanted was to be with Adam. My body was on fire once more, but it had nothing to do with the carb cleaner I’d used earlier. This fire was started by Adam.

I leaned back and pulled Adam on top of me. I could feel the heat of his body too, and I knew he wanted me as much as I wanted him. This moment made the whole horrible weekend worthwhile. I knew right then that I was totally over Rick and that he wasn’t half the man Adam was. Adam stopped kissing me as he tried to get into a better position. As his lips caressed my neck, I suddenly said, “Oh, Rick…”

You know the abrupt sound that’s made when the phonograph needle rips across the record and then everything is totally silent? That was exactly the sound I heard in my head as Adam removed himself from my body. I have never seen anyone move so fast in my life.

“Adam,” I began.

“No! You did not just call me Rick! Damn! I am such a fool!”

“I…I didn’t mean to. Honestly. It must be the alcohol that caused me to say it. Adam, please believe me.”

Adam was walking around the room pulling at his hair. He was clearly hurt. As he walked in front of me, I stood up and tried to soothe him. He shoved me back onto the sofa.

“Don’t touch me, Brandy. Don’t ever touch me again.”

I was crying now. Tears were streaming down my face. “Don’t say that Adam. I think I’m in love with you.”

My confession sent Adam into a rage. He wasn’t violent, but he was losing control of his emotions. He stomped around the room refusing to look at me. When I had just about decided that I should lock myself in the bathroom until he calmed down, he started laughing.

“You love me? That is about the funniest thing I’ve ever heard. You love me. I don’t even think you understand the meaning of that word. A few short hours ago, you were totally in love with Rick. For twenty years, as I recall. But now you think you love me. Brandy, love is more than being aroused when a guy kisses you. It’s more than admiring someone for being nice to you, and it most certainly is more than worshipping some rock star from afar for twenty years!”

I didn’t know what to say to Adam. I wanted to tell him that all my bravado about loving Rick hadn’t been the real me. I wanted him to know that I was normally quite sane and ordinary. Sure, I had always claimed to love Rick, but it was just a silly fantasy. Never in a million years did I believe I’d really meet Rick. When I realized that I was going to meet him, the fantasy just sort of took over. But Adam wouldn’t listen. So I just sat there staring at him.

He walked around in circles for a few minutes, and he seemed to calm down a bit. Then he said, “It’s my fault, you know. I knew how you felt about Rick and that you’d been drinking, but I allowed my emotions to take control and acted like a fool. I should have continued to protect you instead of turning into Rick myself and trying to take advantage of you. I’m really sorry, Brandy.”

I was speechless. Was Adam really apologizing to me?

He continued, “I shouldn’t have confused you like that.”

“I’m not confused, Adam. I want to be with you.”

He ignored me. “Don’t worry. It won’t happen again. I’m not usually like that. I don’t know what came over me.”

I knew that I should leave. Adam needed time to think, and I needed to devise a plan to win Adam over. I stood up and said, “I think I’ll call Alicia now and tell her I’m on my way. Whatever she’s doing, she can do it some other time.”

“I told you she was going to be all night. Trust me. You don’t want to go back tonight. She’s…she’s got a friend over there.”

“A friend? What are you talking about? Just what did you see when you went to get my toothbrush?”

“I really don’t want to talk about it,” he responded. “She’s safe, so you don’t need to worry about her. I’ve already explained that you’ll be staying in my spare room. She’s probably already in bed. And I bought that toothbrush out of the vending machine down the hall. Alicia was too busy to look for yours.”

“I really don’t understand. Who is with Alicia? Why won’t you tell me?”

Adam didn’t reply. He had the same sad look on his face that he’d had when he found me sleeping on his bed. He was undoubtedly protecting me from something, and I had a feeling I knew what that was. I had a good idea who was in the room with Alicia, but I decided to drop the conversation for now. Adam was obviously shaken, and I didn’t want to upset him more.

“We should get some sleep. It’s after two, and this is going to be a big day,” Adam stated. I had a feeling he was referring to something other than the concert.

He walked over to his bedroom and told me, “Make yourself at home. You know where the other bedroom is.”

I started towards my bedroom, and then I heard Adam strumming on the guitar I’d seen earlier. The tune was unfamiliar, but it was beautiful. I found myself drawn to the music, and I stood in his doorway and listened intently. He sat on the edge of the bed playing and didn’t seem to notice that I was there. I found the music moving, especially because he played it with such emotion. When he’d finished, I said, “That’s a beautiful tune. Is it something new?”

“It’s something I’m working on,” he said brusquely. He was flustered that I’d seen him playing. He quickly placed the guitar on the floor and then he leaned back on the bed.

“I like it,” I said.

“I’m sure you’ll love it when I write the lyrics and Rick sings them.”

“Adam, please don’t...”

“Look, let’s not get into this again. We should get some sleep. I’ve already turned down your covers in the other room. I hope you get a good night’s sleep.”

I could take a hint, so I turned and walked out of the room. “Goodnight,” I called over my shoulder.

“Good night,” he responded. “And would you shut my door?”

I gently pulled the door shut and then went to my own room. I climbed into the comfortable looking bed and fell asleep as soon as my head hit the pillow.

I was awakened the next morning by a gentle rapping on the door. As I turned over and stretched, the door slowly opened and Adam peeked in at me. “It’s almost nine o’clock,” he said. “You didn’t say when to wake you, so I thought now might be good.”

“Yes, this is fine,” I answered groggily.

Adam was wearing a red polo shirt and a pair of khaki pants. He looked so good to me, and it made me ache inside. He was carrying my clothes and sneakers from the night before. The clothes were folded neatly, and when he handed them to me, I noticed that they had been freshly laundered. “You did my laundry?”

“
Yeah. I also washed your dress. The paint came out, as far as I could tell. I dropped it off with Alicia.”

“Thanks. You didn’t have to.”

“No, I didn’t. But I did it anyway.”

Adam left the room and I hurriedly straightened the bed. I rushed to the bathroom so I could clean myself up. There was no time for a shower, so I bathed off with a wash cloth
. I then applied some of the cream the doctor had prescribed before putting on my clean clothes. While I was brushing my teeth, I heard someone knocking on the door to Adam’s room. I imagined that it was either Rick or Alicia, but I continued my routine until I felt that I looked somewhat presentable.

When I finished, I came out and noticed that Adam was in the kitchenette. I didn’t see anyone else in the suite, but I smelled bacon. I realize that food should have been the farthest thing from my mind after my drinking binge, but I was starving.

“I ordered us some room service. I hope you are hungry.”

“Yes, I’m really hungry.”

Adam brought the plates and set them on the small coffee table in the sitting room. He sat down opposite of me. The food looked delicious: scrambled eggs, hash browns, bacon, and toast with orange juice for drinking. I grabbed my fork and prepared to dig in, but then Adam said, “Do you want to say grace or should I?

I was once again at a loss for words. I hadn’t realized before that Adam was religious. My family had never been religious. Oh Vince and Stacy believe in God, and they even talked about Jesus from time to time, but we had never gone to church and I only prayed when things got desperate. “Do you always pray before meals?” I asked.

“Not always. But today I feel especially thankful, and I feel the need to praise God.”

“Okay, then you go ahead,” I feebly mumbled.

Adam thanked God for our food and he thanked Him for my speedy recovery from the “accidental poisoning.” Adam seemed to be quite good at praying, but then again, I was no expert.

When he had said “Amen
,” I waited for Adam to pick up his fork before I began chowing down. I was about to shovel a large forkful of eggs into my mouth when I realized that Adam was watching me eat. I dropped my fork and took a small sip of orange juice.

“Is something wrong with the food?” Adam asked.

“No. I’m just thirsty,” I lied.

“Brandy, I’m not going to judge you by the way you eat. You aren’t some teenager on a first date
– eat your food!”

He was right, I was being silly. I looked into his icy blue eyes and we both began to laugh. After that, I ate every bite of my breakfast.

After we had finished eating and had cleared away the dishes, I said, “I really should get back to my room. I’ve got to get Alicia and our stuff so we can check out before eleven.” I did not want to pay for another night in this hotel.

Adam took hold of my arm and shook his head. He had a wretched expression on his face
– as though he was about to tell me that my goldfish had died. “Alicia’s not in the room. She’s…Her friend…He took her out for breakfast. Before she left, I helped her take your stuff down to your car. You can just check out when you are ready to go.”

“Adam, you have got to tell me who Alicia is with. This has gone on long enough. I feel like you are trying to protect me from something, but I have to know sooner or later. Sooner, please.”

“It’s…it’s…,” he couldn’t bring himself to break my heart. It was sweet.

“It’s Rick, right? Alicia spent the night with Rick. Is that what you can’t tell me?”

It was Adam’s turn to be dumbstruck. After a long pause, he asked, “How did you know?”

“How could I not know? Who else could she be with that would torture you so much? Thanks for looking out for me, but I’m not bothered by this at all. Well, I might be miffed at Alicia just a little bit. But I’m certain she took a bullet for me
– trying to show me what a jerk Rick really is. Of course she’s going to be the one who’s miffed when she finds out I already knew Rick was a jerk. If not before, certainly after he wanted you to leave me on the beach alone.”

Adam wasn’t buying my story. “Brandy, you don’t have to be brave about this. I know how you felt about Rick, and to find out he bedded your best friend. That has to be a tremendous shock. You need to show your true feelings and work through this. I’m here for you.”

If I had taken Adam’s advice, I would have been ripping his clothes off right about then. Those were the only feelings I had to work through. Instead, I assured him that I was completely over Rick, “I know you don’t believe me, but I’m not upset about Rick and Alicia. Even if it turns out that they are really in love, it doesn’t matter. Of course I will feel sorry for Alicia for getting hung up on such a jerk, but other than that, I don’t feel a thing.”

Adam was starting to believe me. My confidence was returning. I braced myself for Adam’s exuberant embrace that would probably knock me to the floor.

No embrace. Adam was talking again. “So you truly don’t care? I can’t believe it; I’m in shock. I thought you were really hooked on Rick and that this was going to devastate you.” He paused for a moment to wrap his head around this, and then he said, “Now that you know, what do you plan to do? I guess you’ll want to head back home as soon as possible.”

“No. I’m still going to the concert. Rick is still my favorite entertainer, even if he does behave like an alley cat. And since he might be retiring, it could be my last chance to see him in concert.” And, the longer I stayed with Adam, the better my chances of winning him over.

“Wow,” he said. He sat down on the sofa beside me. “I guess I don’t have to console you, then.”

“You can if you like. I would really like for you too. I can fake it if that will help.”

He smiled. “Boy, am I ever glad that’s over. I’ve been worried about it all night.”

“So when is Alicia due back? I guess I can wait for her in the lobby. I’m sure you have things to do.”

“I have no idea when they are coming back. I don’t even know where they went or what they are driving. Rick’s been using my car, but I have the keys. Anyway, I’m planning on going to church this morning. Do you want to come with me?”

He was asking me to go to church? I’d probably only been inside a church three or four times in my entire life. “How did you find a church? You aren’t from Biloxi.”

“While your clothes were drying, I chatted up the desk clerk. Turns out she’s a believer, and she told me about several good churches that are close to the hotel. I chose a nondenominational one that’s just a few streets away. So, do you want to go or would you rather sit in the lobby and wait who knows how long for Rick and Alicia?”

“I’m really not dressed for church. None of the clothes I have are appropriate.”

“Don’t be ridiculous. You can wear jeans to church. You aren’t going to church to impress the congregation. You’re going to praise Jesus. He doesn’t care what you wear.”

I was still apprehensive and mostly about church in general
– not about my clothes. But it was a chance to be near Adam, so I said, “Yes, I’ll go.”

It was only ten o’clock, and church didn’t start until eleven. Adam and I spent the next half hour talking. I asked him if he went to church every Sunday.

“Whenever I can. Sometimes I have to be on the road.”

“Why?” I asked. This was something that was totally alien to me. My parents had always told me that going to church wasn’t important. Stacy had told me horror stories about the church she attended as a young girl.
According to her, the congregation was full of hypocrites that only came to church to mock everyone else. I couldn’t imagine why Adam wanted to be in church every week.

“I love going,” he replied. “Don’t get me wrong, I haven’t always felt this way. A few years back, I wouldn’t have been caught dead in church. My family had always forced me to go to church when I was younger, and I really resented it. I told anyone who’d listen that the Bible was just a book written by a man who wanted to use it as a political tool. I believed a whole lot of other crap too.”

“What changed?”

“My baby sister Siobhan died.”

“I remember – about 2 years ago.”

“Yes. She was killed in a violent car crash. I was devastated. And I was ang
ry with God. I mean, how could He let the most perfect thing in my life die in such a horrible way? She was so mangled in the wreck, we couldn’t even open her casket for the funeral. I started drinking heavily, and my life was spiraling out of control. I didn’t even want to write songs anymore. A friend of Siobhan’s came to visit me and started telling me all these stories about her that I had never heard before. He told me that Siobhan had been going to church and that she was in the choir. I was amazed, but I didn’t want to hear this. It was just further proof that God had turned His back on her – and on me. Her friend urged me to go to her church with him that Sunday. The church had planned to have a celebration recognizing Siobhan, and he thought I should be there.

“I decided I would go just to see what they had done for Siobhan. I half expected that I would cause a scene and scream to one and all that God didn’t care about anyone. When I arrived at the church, I was totally astounded by what happened. Everyone came to me and told me what a wonderful person Siobhan had been and how much they all loved her
– and how much they loved me. They sang her favorite hymns that day, and the pastor preached on Siobhan’s favorite passage in the Bible, Luke 15:11-32. This is the parable of Jesus that some refer to as the Prodigal Son or the Lost Son. I recognized myself in that story. I was the lost son, and my heart began aching to come home to my Father. I began to understand exactly what Jesus had done for us. I was saved that day, and I’ve never felt lost or hopeless again. I try to live my life to please God – not because I have to, but because I want to. I don’t always succeed, but every new day brings me another opportunity. And thanks to Jesus, my mistakes are no longer counted against me.”

I didn’t understand much of what Adam was saying. I had heard the story of Jesus and how he was crucified, but I wasn’t sure what that had to do with me or with our present day world. But I was happy that Adam had been able to find something that gave him hope.

At around ten-thirty, Adam and I went to check out of our suites, and Adam asked the clerk about leaving my car in the parking lot for the day. She said it would be okay, so we left Sam behind and took Adam’s rental.

The church wasn’t far, and we were soon pulling into their parking lot. It wasn’t at all what I had expected. It wasn’t a cute little white building with a steeple and a cross on top. There were no fancy signs with clever sayings. This church was actually in a strip mall, and it was sitting right next to a Dollar General. There was a small sign over the door that said, “Grace Life Center” which Adam had told me was the name of the church.

A number of people were heading inside, and I noticed that many of them were wearing jeans. In fact, I appeared to be more dressed up than most of the folks going into Grace Life Center. I was surprised; I’d always heard that it was just respectful to dress up for church. I knew women who wouldn’t be caught in church wearing pants. So far, I hadn’t seen a single person wearing a dress. I remembered what Adam had said earlier – about how it didn’t matter what you wore – and I guessed that the people in this church truly embraced that idea. I decided to embrace it too.

Inside, Grace Life Center was one big room with rows and rows of connected burgundy colored seats. The seats all had book racks underneath, and on each rack was a Bible. The floor was covered with carpet that was almost the same burgundy color as the seats. The front of the church had a low stage that was accessible by two stairs on either side. The stage held a podium and, behind it, another burgundy chair and a large wooden crucifix. There were doors leading off the stage in both directions, and I noticed a hallway on the left side of the stage. Along the back wall were several folding tables that held pamphlets and other reading material, signup sheets for future activities, and a stack of this week’s church bulletin. Beyond this, the room was rather plain.

Adam got each of us a bulletin and then we took a seat near the middle of the room. I looked over the bulletin, but I wasn’t sure what to do with it. The front page showed a simple sketch of Jesus surrounded by a group of children and a verse from the Bible. I read the verse over several times: “Truly, I say to you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God like a child shall not enter it. – Luke 18:17.” I wasn’t sure what it meant, but I liked it. Adam appeared to be praying, so I continued to look at the bulletin. Inside the front cover at the very top was the church’s name. Under that it said, “Welcome to God’s House”. I continued reading the list of things on the first page. “Call to Worship” didn’t offer any explanation. I assumed someone would stand up and tell us it was time to worship so we should be quiet. “Greetings and Announcements” included the following sentiment: “We would like to welcome our returning members and all guests. We are glad you’re here!” Under “Scripture Reading – Margaret Nixon”, the passage Luke 18 was listed. Next came “Please Stand and Join Us as We Praise Jesus with Music and Song”, a small note under this explained that the words to each song would be on the monitors at the front of the room. I hadn’t noticed these before, but I looked up and saw that there was one on each side of the stage. I continued looking over the bulletin, but I was beginning to get bored. I noticed that Adam was looking around now, so I asked him when they were going to start.