For the Love of Dixie (18 page)

Dixie Rose

Ruthie and I help Blue bake as we do our best to comfort her. The court case date is drawing closer and it has everyone on edge.

“So what’s going on with you, Ruthie?” she asks.

Ruthie looks at me and I shrug. I get that she’s trying to keep her mind off her own problems.

“Nothing much. Working, and hanging with you,” she answers.

“I’ve noticed. Not that I’m not happy, but I’m wondering what happened with Skull. You never did explain it to us.”

“You going to put me on spot like that?” Ruthie asks.

“Better you, than me obsessing over my situation,” Blue replies, turning to look at us with an eyebrow raised. She’s a demented Martha Stewart in a black apron that says KOC, and her thick hair piled up on top of her head.

“She’s not wrong,” I say.

“Fine, but you’re next, woman.” Frowning, Ruthie points at me.

I grin. Other than amusing stories from work, I have nothing of interest going on in my life. It’s been pretty smooth sailing. “Deal.” 

She sighs and rolls her neck. “We’re just…all over the place. The minute I think we’ve hashed out everything and we’re going to do the long term thing, something else comes up that makes me have too many doubts.”

“Like what?” Blue asks.

Ruthie sighs. “This time, he came back from a run, and wanted to show me a picture of the sunset he caught on the telephone. I was excited that he wanted to share. He’s slow to open up and include me in things. I get that it’s hard when you spend most of your life keeping things secret. So I never push. But while he’s shifting through his photos, I see a picture of him and a blonde.”

“And you went off on him over that?” Blue asks.

“Well, she was on her knees in front of him, so…”

“Jesus,” I whisper. I’d slaughter Echo, but we talked about this shit a long time ago. What happens on the road stays on the road doesn’t work for me. If he was going to be pulling that, he’d need to worry about what happens with me while he was on the road.

“You know what happens on the road, stays on the road,” Blue whispers.

“Except when it doesn’t. I had this don’t ask don’t tell philosophy. I mean, I knew he wasn’t fucking anyone else, but being slapped in the face by it was too much. I started wondering about all the shit I didn’t know about and flipped my shit.”

“Why would his dumb ass keep the picture?” I ask.

“Apparently, he was bombed out of his mind, and didn’t even remember taking it. Which makes me feel real secure in the ‘it
was just a little road head’ argument he threw my way,” Ruth says. Her eyes are watery.

I’m feeling for her.

“Damn, I’m sorry, girl. You can’t leave this stuff unsaid. You have to talk about rules and where you stand before they leave. But regardless, he came home to you,” Blue says.

“I’m not sure that’s enough for me.” Ruthie sighs.

“Did you ask him if he’d keep it in his pants next time?” I ask.

“We didn’t get that far. He was pissed at me for being upset, and the fight escalated. Next thing I know, dishes are flying, cuss words are going back and forth, and he’s storming out telling me he can’t deal with my shit. We’re from two different worlds. Maybe we’ve been foolish playing house and pretending somehow we could meet in the middle.”

“Wait, playing house?” I say.

“Yeah, he’s all but living there, or he was, until our blow out,” Ruthie mumbles.

“Girl! That’s huge!” Blue says.

Ruthie shakes her head.

“Do you want to work it out?” I ask.

“Yes, I fucking—I love his stupid ass. But I can’t be alone in that. I can’t bend to the point of breaking while he remains where he’s at.”

Blue closes the oven, and places a hand on Ruthie’s shoulder. “Does he know you love him?”

Ruthie shrugs. “I don’t know. I’ve never said it out loud. I didn’t even admit it to myself until he froze me out this month.”

“Damn, dude. No wonder you guys looked so awkward at the wedding,” Blue says.

“That’s why I didn’t tell you. I wanted your day to be all about you and Shadow, without our drama.”

“All I know is, men don’t go back and forth for over a year because the pussy is good. Not when he could sleep with whoever, whenever he wanted. Feelings are involved. You two need to have a sit down and talk it out.”

“I’m not ready. I need to figure out what the hell I want before I approach him.”

“Yeah, you do,” I agree. “Take care of you first, and the rest will come to you. We got your back. It’s a hard lifestyle for relationships to survive in, and you’re absolutely correct. The man has to be willing to meet you halfway as much as he can.”

Ruthie sighs. “Why couldn’t I have met him when I wanted anything but serious. He’d have made the perfect fuck buddy.”

Blue laughs. “’Cause life is never that easy, and honestly, I sort of think you’re perfect for each other. I would’ve told you to leave him alone a long time ago, if that wasn’t the case.”

“Time will tell, right?” Ruthie asks.

“It has a way of showing you what stays and what fades away. The heart is a bitch like that. She does what she wants regardless of logic, or what we actually want. If I’d had my way, I would’ve been over Echo years ago. I tried to move on, but no relationship ever felt right. No man could outdo him.” I shake my head. “First love is dangerous that way. It’s tattooed on your heart and your soul.”

“That’s deep,” Blue whispers.

I nod at her statement. “But true.”

“Very much so.” 

“How are you doing right now?” Ruthie asks Blue.

“I’m nervous as hell. I mean, just a few days and Bolt could be taken from us,” she answers.

“Never going to happen,” I say. “There’s no grounds for removal.”

“If the judge has a hard on for M.C.s there could be,” Blue argues.

I want to tell her she’s wrong, but we both know better.

“It seems like we should make this an official girl’s night and order pizza,” Ruthie suggests.

Blue grins. “I’m down for that.”

“Pepperoni and cheesy breadsticks?” I ask.

“Yes, and extra sauce on the side,” Ruthie says.

I laugh. “This is why I like you.”

She winks.

We order the pizza, pop out beers, and gather around the couch talking about smaller things.

“How’s the new job going?” Blue asks.

I laugh. “Dude, I am thoroughly entertained daily! I mean, some people come in and their stories are mind blowing. People suffering from cancer, insane migraines caused from horrific crashes, and then there are those you know bullshitted their way into a card.” I laugh and shake my head. “I love it.”

“Aren’t you afraid of being robbed?” Ruthie asks.

“Not with our security. If they get to me, they came in with a tank or something,” I scoff.

She laughs. “Yeah, sounds about right for KOC.”

A knock sounds.

“The pizza man wasn’t playing,” Blue jokes as she stands and walks over to the door. “What the fuck is she doing here?”

“Who?” I ask, jumping up.

“My mother.”

“Oh, shit,” Ruthie mutters.

We join her at the door. “Want to call Shadow?” I ask.

“No, I want to know what she wants.” Blue opens the door. “You have a lot of fucking nerve.”

“Please listen to me, it’s not what you think,” Pixie says.

It’s then that I really see her for the first time. Normally, the woman is flawless. Right now, bags and dark circles mar the areas under her eyes. Her hair is ratty, her clothes are stained and hang off her slight frame.

Blue narrows her eyes, but steps back, allowing her mother to enter.

“I didn’t want to do this. I want you to know that,” Pixie says. She runs her fingers through her hair, and I see exactly why her hair looks like an animal’s nest.

“So why did you?”

“Because I was scared not to.”

“Scared of who?”

“Battle’s people.”

“What?” Blue shouts.

Her mother shrinks back. “Kings aren’t the only people pissed at me.”

“What’s going on, Mom?” Blue asks, sounding worried.

“Battle’s people have been in contact. Telling me I need to get his grandson back and if I don’t, they’ll make sure I regret it, and Calla suffers.”

“How does that make sense? She’s his child, I’m sure they want her on their side,” Blue says.

“I know, but how could I risk it?”

“You should have told Stone immediately,” Blue says harshly.

“How? He can barely stand the sight of me, and I think they’re watching the house.”

“Jesus. See what lies get you?” Blue hisses.

“I did the best I could with the situation. I know I screwed you over, and I’m sorry. I was just so worried about her. I knew you’d be fine. You always had a good head on your shoulders, and a father who’d do anything for you. I didn’t have to worry about the past coming back to haunt you.”

“That’s all you have to say? You know what? Sit down, and don’t say shit. I’m going to make some calls,” Blue snaps.

Pixie slinks off to the couch.

“Do you want us to go?” I ask.

“No, please stay and keep me from killing her with my bare hands. I’ve just reached my threshold of what I can take with her,” Blue seethes.

“And no one blames you for that, trust me,” I reply.

“Yeah. I should never have let it get this far. I hate the way I used to be. I took way too much, because I was trying to keep the peace.”

“It’s an admirable trait. Don’t beat yourself up for trying to be the one who always took the high road,” Ruthie says.

“I look around now though, and I can’t help but think, sure it was admirable, but at what cost? Would this have gone down the same way if I’d just stepped up?”

“We all know you can’t live in the past like that. It’s not good for anyone,” I remark.

“Yeah, you’re right. Let me hit up Stone,” Blue says, stepping away to grab her phone.

Ruthie and I cross our arms over our chest and glare at the bedraggled woman on the couch.

“You’re a pitiful excuse for a mother. If you want to make this right, you’ll woman up and withdraw the suit. Consequences be damned,” I say.

“This is my life we’re talking about,” Pixie whispers.

“And it’s been their lives you played God with all these years. I say karma is a bitch…bitch,” Ruthie says.

She looks away from us, pursing her lips.

“Do you even have a heart? All I hear is you playing the victim and begging to be rescued. Not a week ago, you were slapping your grandson in front of God and everyone.”

“That was an accident.”

“Really? So, a ghost jumped into your body and made you do it?” Ruthie asks.

I snicker.

“No, of course not. I was overwhelmed and I took it out on the wrong person,” Pixie states.

“And yet, you want us to believe you’re fit enough to raise a child?” I say.

“I’m not… I explained why I did that—”

“And why should we believe you? Maybe you’re working with them right now,” I suggest.

“I’m not.”

I shrug halfheartedly. “Hmmm. I guess that’ll be up to Stone to decide.”

Her face pales.

I smirk.
You should be worried.

Echo

Shit.
I open my eyes and grab the phone screaming at me from the nightstand. “Hello?”

“Mandatory church, brother, get your ass up,” Shadow says.

“Ugh. All right, brother, I’ll get dressed and be there.” I hang up and force my aching body into a sitting position. We stayed up all night in the garage catching up on work. With a run and the impromptu wedding back-to-back, we’d all gotten a bit behind. I swipe at my eyes with the back of my hand and climb from bed. Padding over the wood floor I enter the bathroom and turn on the faucet. After running water over my head and face, I finger tame my hair into a ponytail and blot my face with my towel. My eyes are tinted pink and light circles line my lids.
Fuck it. It’ll do.
I power brush my teeth, put my feet in my boots, and make my way toward church.

When I enter, I notice Stone standing in the front of the room. He looks pissed. His face is red and his eyes are full of murder. Whatever he has to announce is going to be huge. I take a seat by the wall, and lean my head back against it. Still waking up, I watch as the brothers pour in. When we’re all in, the door is closed.

“I found out some news that has me pissed as fuck,” Stone states. “We all know Pixie is trying to go for custody of Bolton. I guessed it to be a combination of grief and jealousy. She just had a major loss, and her daughter is starting a new life and happy as shit. I don’t pretend to understand all bitches, but I know they can be catty and petty. I’ve seen bullshit like this put brothers at odds in a club before. I figured she’d get her ass handed to her in court, and shit would start to settle. Then I hear some shit about why she was doing it. Battle’s people have been strong arming her. Telling her without them, Calla will be vulnerable in prison and they’ll wreck Pixie’s world.”

“What the fuck?” Shadow barks.

“I know, brother, its bullshit. We settled up with them. Shit should be done. That they’d come behind my back and pull this, tells me we got major problems. If the President doesn’t know about this, it mean his boys are out of control. We can’t have that shit.”

“So what do you want to do, Boss?” Wizard asks.

“I want to ride down there and sort these motherfuckers out. We’re either disbanding the chapter or cutting out the cancer before it spreads. We all know this is Battle’s people. Once we take back our patches and ink off the others, we’ll decide what to do from there. Afterward, Pixie is going to withdraw her suit. It’ll never see court. I want us to all ride in tonight. I want to come in hard and strong, and decimate. I’ll burn my own shit down before I let someone else destroy it.”

“Where’s Pixie now?” Shadow asks.

“She’s with Blue. I got Dixie Rose with her and a gang of prospects inside, outside, and doing constant drive-bys. No one’s getting to them.”

“Then let’s do this. I want this shit settled yesterday,” Shadow says.

“We got a route mapped out that’ll take us in discreetly. Handle your business and be ready to ride. I got a crew I’m leaving behind to hold things down in case this is a set up. I don’t trust shit out of Pixie’s mouth at this point. Go get ready to travel. Vests on,” Stone instructs, dismissing us.

Like that, we’re on what could be a kamikaze mission. I run my hand through my hair.
Shit.
I walk back to my room and call D’Rose.

“Hello?”

“Hey, babe, just wanted to hear your voice. I’m getting ready to take care of some business that came up.”

She’s silent. “Scale of one to ten?”

“About an eight,” I say. We’ve developed our own short hand for dealing with club business. I can’t tell her what I’m doing, but I can tell her what the level of danger is.

“Jesus.”

“Yeah. You know I love you, girl, don’t you?” I ask, holding the phone to my ear with my shoulder as I pack my saddlebags and pull my vest out from the back of the closet.

“Yes, and I love you, too.”

“When this shit is over and Mouth is out of the picture, I want to do this right. Me and you in our own place.”

“Okay.”

I blink. “Yeah?” I say cautiously. She gave in way too easily.

“Yes, I want that, too. I’m ready for the next step with you. I miss you just as much as you miss me when we’re not together. I want to take advantage of every minute I have. I let the fear hold me back a little. I’m over that. It’s not worth it.”

“More reason for me to get things in order,” I say.

“Be safe, and come home to me?”

“Always, D’Rose. You know that.”

“I do, love you.”

“Love you, too, girl.” I hang up before we draw things out further. I need to get my head on straight. I add my cell phone charger to the bag, shrug off my cut, and put on a bulletproof vest over my shirt. After slipping on a hoodie, I add my cut. Grabbing my saddle bag, I throw it over my shoulder and leave the room.