“So wet for me. I can feel your heat against my palm,” he told her. “No coming until I say so.”
Alex ran his thumb over her clit, back and forth, round and round, over and over again. Suddenly he stepped away from her. Tara bit back her protest. Barely.
There was the sound of buzzing.
Oh no.
“Do not come without permission,” he warned again. “Or I’ll take a paddle to your ass.”
Crap.
He placed the vibrator against her clit and fire lit her insides. Her clit swelled as need poured through her. Tara tried to breathe her way through it. She attempted to think of anything else but the vibrator driving her wild. Alex drove two fingers deep inside her and she groaned, clenching around him.
“Please, Sir,” she begged. Sucking him off always turned her on. Add that to the flogging and nipple play and she was ready to blow.
“Not yet.”
He continued to play with her, thrusting his fingers in and out of her hot sheath, teasing her clit with the vibrator until she swore she couldn’t hold on any longer.
“Please, please, please,” she begged.
“Just a bit more.”
A deep groan erupted from her.
Not fair, so not fair.
“Come, Tara. Come now.”
He drove his fingers in and out of her. Tara screamed as she came, her body shuddering so hard she was grateful she was restrained.
He didn’t let up though, keeping the vibrator against her sensitive clit. “Come again, Tara.”
“No,” she cried out.
“Yes. Come again. Now.”
Another orgasm erupted from her, so violently she swore she saw stars. She collapsed against the cross, breathing deeply.
“Good girl,” Alex told her in a deep voice. She felt him undo her ankle cuffs then he lifted her legs. “Place your legs around my waist.”
She secured her legs around his waist as he clasped her beneath the ass, holding her weight so it didn’t place strain on her arms. Then he thrust his cock deep inside her.
Tara threw her head back as he filled her with his thick cock.
“You feel so good. I’m going to embarrass myself,” he muttered, pausing when he was fully inside her.
“I don’t mind,” she mumbled, still spinning from her orgasms.
Alex thrust back and forth, moving slowly. “I want you to come with me.”
“Nooo,” she groaned. She couldn’t. “Not again.”
“Yes, again,” he told her. He shifted her weight before slipping off her blindfold. She blinked, bringing him into focus.
He stared at her as he reached down between their bodies and rubbed her swollen clit. His slow, rocking movements sped up.
“Sir, I can’t.”
“You can. Because I demand it of you.”
A sob left her mouth and she closed her eyes.
Smack! She opened her eyes quickly at the sharp, stinging smack on her inner thigh.
“Keep your eyes on me,” Alex demanded.
She watched him, his gaze intense, deep need filling his face.
He moved his thumb over her clit in light, sensual strokes. Tara felt the need building in her body.
“Come with me, Tara,” Alex said in a low voice.
A few more strokes and orgasm washed through her. This one was slower, gentler, but no less pleasurable. As she came, Alex gave a few more hard strokes before throwing his head back and groaning as he came deep inside her. She watched, memorizing this moment.
God she loved him.
Crap. Crap. Fuck!
She loved him. The one thing she’d promised not to do. She’d broken their contract. Would he be able to see it on her face?
“What’s wrong?” Alex asked. “Are you cramping?”
“Ahh, no, I’m fine.”
He placed her legs on the floor then quickly untied her wrists, gathering her up in his arms. “It didn’t look like nothing.”
She should tell him, break things off. After all, she’d just told him that she didn’t lie. But she wasn’t quite ready for this to end.
Reaching up, she cupped his face. “You’re so sexy.”
He raised his eyebrows, a smile tugging at his lips.
“Is that right?”
“Uh-huh. Really, really hot.”
He snorted. “I think it’s time we went home.”
She nodded. “Yeah. Only, could we take the nipple clamps off first?”
Chapter Ten
Tara rushed into her apartment and grabbed her ringing cell phone—a gift from Alex. He’d joked that it was so he could tabs on her. She planned on paying him back. Something else to add to the list of things that she owed him.
She’d spent the last few weeks fruitlessly searching for a job. She had to find something soon. She needed her own apartment. She couldn’t go on with things the way they were between her and Alex. This kind of half-relationship was torture. He was with her, but he wasn’t.
There was no denying that she loved him. But every day she also hated him a little bit more because she knew he’d never love her back. She needed to get her identity back. She needed to have something in her life other than him, because it wasn’t healthy to obsess over a man who would never give you what you truly needed—his love.
“Hello?” she said breathlessly.
“Tara?”
“Tim! I’ve been trying to get in contact with you.”
She had left him a few more messages on his cell phone, but she hadn’t wanted to call him too often. Alex was footing the phone bill, after all.
“I know. Sorry, I’ve been immersed in a bunch of shit. Someone undercut us on the Sanders bid.”
“What? I thought that contract was all wrapped up.”
“All but. Apparently, someone approached Angus Sanders with a better offer. Everything we’d included but for five percent less.”
“Shit. Who was it?”
“Don’t know. He won’t tell me. Luckily, we’re old friends so he gave me the chance to re-pitch. I don’t like this, Tara. I think someone has been selling confidential information.”
“What? Who would do that?”
“Well, only a few people had access to that information.”
“You don’t think it was me, do you? Tim, I would never—”
“No, no,” he said hastily. “I don’t think it was you. You’ve worked for me for over a year and this only begun recently. I really shouldn’t have let you go. If you want your old job back then just say the word.”
It was starting to look like she might have to take him up on that.
“Well, I hope you figure it out soon. I went to return my laptop and pen drive the other day. Eloise was there.”
“Did you give them to her?” he asked quickly.
“No, I still have them.”
“Okay. Good. Just keep them on you until I work a few things out, okay?”
“Umm, I don’t know, Tim, I—”
“That would be a great help. Thanks, Tara. I’ve got to go.”
He hung up before she could say anything more. Damn. She’d really rather not keep the laptop and pen drive. Then again, with the way her job searching was going she might just have to go back to work for Tim.
The doorbell to the apartment rang and she opened the door.
“Did you check who it was first?” Alex asked as he entered.
“No, but I knew it would be you.” He was taking her to the club tonight.
“You check it every time, you understand me? No matter whether you’re expecting someone or not.”
“Yes, Sir.”
He’d grown fiercely protective of her. It was kind of cute. If a little frustrating at times.
“Are you ready to go?” he asked, glancing down at his phone.
“I just need to grab my bag.”
“Make sure you bring your cell phone.”
Tara grabbed the phone. She didn’t really need it; she’d be with Alex all night, but she knew he liked her to keep it on her at all times.
“Is it charged?” he said from behind her.
“Yep. Alex, I have something I need to talk to you about. It has to do with my job.” She should tell him about the phone call she’d just had.
He looked up from his phone. “I told you that you don’t need to rush to find a job. I will pay for everything. What is it? Do you need money for clothes? Food?”
“No, I’m fine,” she said, feeling humiliated.
This was all their relationship was. His money, her submission and some really hot sex. Oh, and she’d let herself fall in love with him. She couldn’t keep going on like this. Each day she was dying just a little more inside.
Tara pulled herself together, determined not to cry about it. She’d gone into this with her eyes open, the fact that she was hurt wasn’t his problem. She needed to come clean with him. Soon.
“No, it’s nothing to do with money. It has to do with my old job.”
Alex glanced at his watch. “Sure.” His phone rang and he frowned. “Damn, I have to take this, can we talk later?”
“Sure,” she said quietly. “Later.”
***
Tara sat in the dressing room, trying to find the energy to move. She needed to take charge of her life again. She deserved happiness. She deserved to be loved. And Alex deserved her honesty. She’d broken their contract and she needed to tell him.
“Tara!”
Glancing over, she summoned up a small smile as Reagan walked towards her.
“Reagan, how are you?”
The other woman shrugged her shoulders. “So-so. Still can’t get Dash to talk to me. When he sees me coming, he walks the other way. I don’t understand it.”
Tara bit her lip. She’d heard about Reagan’s scene with Dash, one of the younger Doms. She’d pretty much torn him to bits. It wasn’t nice to laugh, but it was a little bit funny because Dash happened to be an arrogant jerk.
“Who knew that giving him a few tips would hurt his feelings? Doms are so sensitive sometimes.”
Tara couldn’t hold back her grin. “Uh-huh, probably best not to tell them that, though.”
“Yeah, I suppose you’re right. So, I heard you and Alex are together.”
“Sort of.” She turned to look at herself in the mirror. “We have a mutually satisfying relationship.”
Reagan frowned. “What does that mean?”
“It means we fuck and we play and nothing more.”
“Oh.” Reagan was quiet for a long moment. “You don’t sound too happy about it.”
“Don’t I? I guess I feel like I’m just waiting for the other shoe to drop all the time.” She sighed. “Just ignore me. I’ve been job hunting all week and it’s depressing me. There’s only so much rejection a girl can take.”
“You’re looking for a job?”
Tara nodded.
“Perfect,” Reagan said with a big smile.
“Uhh, it is?” Tara asked in confusion.
“I need an assistant. Mine is retiring. You’re hired.”
“Reagan, you don’t even know my credentials.”
Reagan waved her hand. “If you’re no good, I’ll fire you.”
“But that would hurt our friendship.”
“How? Work is totally separate from friendship.”
Okay. It wasn’t that simple to most people, but she supposed if Reagan could separate her work and social life, she could as well.
“Come in Monday, we’ll talk about your duties and pay. My assistant is retiring at the end of the month, she’ll be happy to train you.”
“Okay. I’ll do it.”
“Great! Come on, Alex will be looking for you.”
Tara still needed to tell him about the phone call from Tim. She’d rather have told him in private but he’d been preoccupied with work on the drive here.
She spotted him striding toward her. He stopped in front of her. Damn, he was hot. Dashing, dark and handsome.
“Beautiful,” he told her. Tara smiled up at him.
He held out his hand, clasping hers firmly. He led her to an area with couches and a couple of chairs where some other subs were sitting. “Stay here until I come back for you.”
“Alex, I need to talk to you,” she said, reaching out for him.
He raised his eyebrows. “Alex?”
“Sir. I’m sorry. But I do need to talk to you.”
He nodded. “Can you wait for a bit? Dylan needs my help, one of the other dungeon monitors called in sick and they’re waiting for the replacement to arrive.”
“Okay, sure.” Tara sat with a thump in the chair.
***
“Master Alex? Can I speak with you?”
Alex turned around to find Tilly standing behind him.
“I’m not on duty tonight, Tilly. I was just helping out. I’ve got to get back to Tara.”
“It’s about Tara.” There was a tense note in her voice and he watched her carefully. Her shoulders were tense, her hands clenched at her sides.
“All right. If it’s important.”
“It is. Over here.” She waved toward the quieter area.
Alex took a seat on the sofa while Tilly sat on a large armchair.
“All right, talk.”
She raised her gaze to his. “You’re being a jerk.”
“Excuse me?” he asked in a low voice.
“I know you’ll think I’m being disrespectful but I’m going to be blunt because I don’t know how else to get through to you. I’m talking to you as Tara’s friend. You can punish me later if you like, but I’m still going to say this. You’re not being fair to Tara. You’re using her and its tearing her apart. If you can’t see how fantastic she is then let her go.”
“What has Tara been saying to you?”
“That’s just it. She hasn’t said anything. She’s my best friend and we never talk about her relationship with you. Do you think that’s normal? Every time I bring it up, she gets this sad look in her eyes. She’s miserable and if you can’t see it then you need to walk away. Because you are the cause.”
Alex was taken aback. Was she right? Was Tara miserable?
He recalled the way she’d looked at him tonight. She was sad. How had he not seen it before? Because he was too engulfed in his own issues.
“I was trying to protect us both.” He hadn’t wanted either of them to get hurt when this ended. Somehow that had backfired. The thought of losing Tara made him feel physically ill.
“Tara is one of the strongest people I know, but even strong people need help, even they need someone to rely on. I hoped you would be that for Tara. She’s wanted you for the longest time. I hoped you’d sweep her off her feet. I love Tara. She’s always been there for me when I needed her and never asked anything in return. Do you know why she was living in such a crappy apartment and working for Tim the Terrible?”
“I assumed she needed the money.”
“For what? She wears second-hand clothes, barely eats and doesn’t drive. She hasn’t told you about her brother, has she? You know, there is more to a relationship that just sex.”
“I know she has a brother, what about him?”
He recalled her mentioning him briefly.
“He’s in medical school. He has a scholarship, but it doesn’t pay for food and clothes. Tara supports him. Maybe if you talked to her once in a while you would know all of this.”
Tilly stood up, hands on her hips. Alex saw Dylan walk toward them. He stopped behind the short sub who obviously didn’t hear him approach. “You need to decide what you want, Alex. Do you want to be alone and sad all your life? If yes, don’t bring Tara down with you. If you do the brave thing and decide to take what she’s offering, then you better hope you haven’t already damaged the best thing that ever happened to you. Be a real man, Alex. Either let her go or love her.”
“Tilly!” Dylan said in an angry, shocked voice. “I think that’s quite enough.”
Tilly went still, her eyes widening. Slowly, she looked over her shoulder at Dylan. “I didn’t hear you, Sir.”
“I can tell that. I’ll make sure she’s punished for her disrespect,” he said to Alex.
Alex looked up at him tiredly. “Please don’t. Every word she said is true. I just needed someone to kick my ass and point it out to me.”
“If you’re sure.”
“I am. Thank you,” he said to Tilly as she went to turn away.
She nodded and then fled, Dylan glaring after her.
“She was rude.”
“She told me the truth and it’s what I needed to hear. She was just protecting her friend. Can’t blame her for that.”
Dylan grunted. “This was about Tara?”
“Yes.”
“You going to fix things?”
Alex raised his eyebrows.
“She looks sad. I don’t like it.”
“Neither do I,” Alex said. “I’ve been an ass.”
Dylan snorted.
“She’s the best thing that ever happened to me only I was too caught up in the past to realize it. Tilly is right. I need to tell Tara I love her before I lose her.” He felt at ease. This felt right. He loved her. He’d loved her since the night she’d gone drinking with Tilly and he’d sat in her apartment, worrying about her. He only hoped she felt the same way.
“Really?” Dylan said. “Didn’t think you’d ever admit it.”
“I do. I love her. I’ve let what Simone did to me color my actions for too long. I just hope she can forgive me.”
“If she loves you she’ll forgive you.”
Alex wasn’t so sure. “We have a contract that says we’re not to fall in love with each other.”
Dylan snorted. “So apologize and then tear the contract up.” His friend patted him on the shoulder and left.
Could it be that simple?
Alex moved back to the seating area where he’d left Tara, frowning when he saw she wasn’t there. He looked at the other subs. Her friend, Issac was kneeling on the ground, glaring up at him.
“Have you seen Tara?” he asked.
Issac crossed his arms over his chest. “What do you care?”
Mia, his Domme, stepped up behind him. “Watch your tone, pet.”
“Sorry, Ma’am,” Issac replied.
“Answer him, pet.”
“Yeah. She told me she had to go. She said to tell you that she would leave you something at the front desk.”
Alex frowned. She’d left without telling him?
“Thank you,” he replied, nodding at Issac and Mia.
Mia nodded coldly. “Tara is a good friend. To both of us.” She placed her hand on Issac’s shoulder.
“I know. I’m sorry for my behavior the other day. It won’t happen again.”
She nodded, softening slightly. “Come on, pet. I’ve a hankering to put stripes on your ass tonight.”
Issac followed, looking undaunted at the idea of having his ass reddened.
What the hell would cause Tara to just leave the club without telling him?
“Why didn’t she come and get me?” he muttered to himself as he headed toward the reception area.
“Sammi, did Tara leave me something?” he asked the petite sub who manned the front desk.
Sammi looked up at him with wide eyes, her normally sunny smile absent.