Forbidden Ballad - Rock My World (17 page)

“Mark,” I say slowly, “It’s fine. Everything sounds amazing. No rush.”

We finish our drinks and Mark stands up. “I should be going. A lot to do,” he explains.

I nod. “I think I’ll hang out for a little bit.”

He smiles again and then gives me a little wave as he heads out the door.

I can’t help myself, and I quickly pull out my phone and Google my name. Sure enough, a bunch of hits come up.

I click on the first link, an entertainment site.

Carly Michaels, former half of Sideroad, wows audience. Walker who?

I gasp at the mention of Walker, but click on the link. It’s me singing again. Below there are hundreds of comments. I scroll through and most of them are positive.

Wow, she can sing.

I’m not a country fan, but I’d buy her rock CD.

Hot girl, hot voice.

I’m deeply touched by these strangers’ comments.

I go back to the Google home page and click the next link – a gossip site.

Somewhere in a corner Walker Stevens is crying
reads the title. I giggle and scroll down to read the brief blurb, which basically says I can stand on my own as a rock singer, and it’s a wonder I didn’t start out with rock music.

I spend a few more minutes reading snippets, and after I’ve had my fill, I leave. I call Quinn as I walk around the city.

“Oh my gosh! Carly! How was it?”

“It was the craziest thing! I had no idea it would be like that!”

“I watched a bunch of the clips! You were amazing!”

“Thanks! I still can’t believe it.”

I quickly fill Quinn in on how I was offered to open permanently, giving her every detail, including how I would have my own tour bus since it had been a group initially opening.

“Holy crap!” she squeals. “That is so freaking amazing! How is Leo? Is he beyond excited?”

I pause just a little too long, feeling a fresh wave of sadness. Quinn is too perceptive.

“Car?” she asks quietly. “Did something happen?”

“I really don’t want to talk about it. I’m trying to focus on the good news of opening the show.”

“Okay, I get it. But if you want to talk, you know I’m here.”

I sigh. “I don’t want to get into details because it’s just going to upset me again. It’s still so fresh. But to make a long story short, the former back up singer, the one who I replaced, appeared last night out of the blue. And Leo and I had just had a really, umm, intense experience together,” Quinn didn’t need
those
details. “Turns out the woman, Skyler, left the show because she’s pregnant with Leo’s child.”

Quinn gasps. “Are you sure? You’re positive?”

“I’m positive.”

“Well, what did Leo have to say about it?”

“Who cares what Leo had to say about it? He didn’t tell me!” I exclaim.

Quinn’s quiet on the other end and that annoys me. She should be jumping to my defense.

“Did it just happen? Was she big and fat pregnant, or newly pregnant?”

“I mean, she wasn’t showing or anything,” I say annoyed, “But what does that matter? He purposefully didn’t tell me. He said something like he was just trying to be this good guy for me and thought it would scare me away.”

“Would it have scared you away? Was he right?”

“Of course it would have scared me away!”

“Well, I can kind of understand why he wouldn’t tell you.”

“Why are you defending him?” My voice rises with anger.

“I’m not!” Quinn says quickly. “It’s just, I kind of see his point. You told me that he was working so hard for you and he wasn’t used to actually pursing a woman. You said he was new to the whole dating thing. So if he really liked you, I can sort of understand why he would keep it hidden.”

“I honestly can’t believe you’re taking his side.”

“I’m not! I’m just playing Devil’s Advocate here. Look, let’s just forget it, okay? I’d be pissed too, and I understand why you’re upset. I’m certainly not saying you shouldn’t be angry – I would be, too. Sorry. I don’t want to ruin all your good news today.”

“It doesn’t matter,” I say sadly, “This whole pregnancy thing has put a damper on it anyway.”

“Look, forget what I said. Go on back and move into your very own, private tour bus, you lucky bitch! I want to see pictures! I’m seriously so proud of you.”

My anger dissipates. “Thanks Quinn. I miss you.”

“Miss you too.”

The line goes dead, and I start to make my way back to the arena. I can’t stop thinking over what Quinn said; she was quick to jump to Leo’s defense. Wasn’t she? Was I wrong in not hearing Leo out? Skyler left the tour before I came on board, that’s the reason they needed me, so obviously she had already known she was pregnant. So did that mean that Leo knew before he had even met me?

I’m not sure if that makes things better or worse.

I sigh, and continue walking.

Maybe I should have given Leo a chance to explain? But still, as we had been growing closer, he should have told me.

I stew all the way back to the buses, wrestling with my own thoughts. Did I ever think that things would become serious with Leo?

Yes, I did.

Otherwise I wouldn’t have wasted my time or heart on him, especially after what I went through with Walker. I had worried that Leo was a rebound, but instead of getting sick of him, I only cared more of him.

But he had gone and screwed it all up.

When I walk on the bus, I only see Mae Li curled up on the couch reading; the bus is silent.

“Hey, congratulations,” she says, smiling at me and putting her book down.

“Thanks. Where is everyone?”

“Amber went out and Ginny is back there sleeping,” she nods to the bedroom that she shares with Ginny. “Rough night last night,” she chuckles.

Right. I forgot that most people went out last night. While I was busy learning my sort-of rock star boyfriend had knocked up his previous back up singer.

“Okay. I’m going to head back and pack up my stuff.”

“Your stuff?” Mae Li asks confused.

I nod. “I’m only going to sing back up until they can replace me. The new singer will move onto the bus. They’re moving me to Eden’s former bus.”

Mae Li lets out a low whistle. “Good for you, girl.”

I flash her a grin. “Thanks.” As I head back to my room, I realize that I really like Mae Li. She doesn’t get involved with any of the stupid drama, and while she’s very quiet, she’s friendly. She seems trustworthy too, but I’m not about to confide in anyone.

It takes me less than twenty minutes to pack and Mae Li watches as I take my bags off the bus.

“See you around,” I say, as I grab my last bag.

“Yep! See you in the makeup chair tonight!”

I haul my bags across the parking lot and I’m happy to find that the bus is unlocked. I can smell the cleaning products as I climb on. What I’m not expecting are the dozens of roses that cover every counter space.

I’d like to think these are congratulatory flowers from Mark, but I know better. Sighing, I pick up the notes attached to one of the vases; there must be at least twenty dozen roses.

Carly – I’m sorry. I understand if you want nothing to do with me again, but please just give me a chance to explain. ~Leo

I throw the note in the trash and look around the bus.

It’s roughly the same size of the one I shared with the girls, though it’s slightly nicer. Of course, it’s not as nice as the band’s bus.

Ignoring the flowers, I run my hands over the granite counters, at least what’s not covered by roses, and then take in the comfortable sitting area. There’s an L-shaped couch and it faces a flat screen TV mounted on the wall.

I move into the back and see that there are two bedrooms nearly identical to the ones I shared with Ginny, Amber and Mae Li. One of the rooms has bunks while the other one has an actual bed in the center of the room. I choose the room with the bed and get to unpacking. It will be nice to sleep in a full size bed as opposed to a bunk.

Unpacking is relatively quick, and I remember that Mark had sent me a text earlier about rehearsing. I check the time and see that I have fifteen minutes. I quickly apply some lip-gloss and figure that my jeans and t-shirt are good enough for rehearsing.

I walk into the building and step onstage only to see Leo sitting in the audience.

“Excuse me,” I say in a tight voice to the band and head over to the edge of the stage.

I place my hands on my hips. “What the hell are you doing here?” I ask in a low voice.

“I needed to see you.” Leo doesn’t look very well rested, and I take in the dark circles under his eyes and his sloppy clothes.

“I’m working right now. It’s not a good time.”

“Did you get my roses?”

“Yes.” I say rudely, forcing myself not to say thank you.

“Please, Carly.”

“I’d really like you to leave, Leo.”

Leo straightens his jaw. “It’s not a closed rehearsal, so I can stay here if I want.”

“Fine,” I say exasperated, “Suit yourself.”

I stalk back to the mic and motion for the band that I’m ready. We start with the Sideroad songs, and work our way through them. I feel better doing them this time and I know it’s because I’ve had the chance to perform them live.

I purposefully don’t look at Leo, and we move onto the covers. The hour flies by, and Mark stops us, saying that I sound great and he doesn’t want me to hurt my voice. I thank the band and make my way off the stage. I’m not surprised to find Leo blocking my path as I go to head back to the buses.

“Excuse me,” I say in a flat voice.

“Carly. I’m begging you. Please hear me out.”

“What?” I cry, looking him dead in the eye. “What could you possibly have to say to me? What could you say that would actually make me change my mind?”

He stared at me for a moment, not speaking. “I don’t know what I can say to change your mind,” he said quietly. “But I do know that I can tell you the truth and you can decide for yourself how you feel.”

Something about the way Leo spoke – the quiet defeat in his voice, or the way he sounded less cocky than I’d ever heard before – brought my defenses down.

I sigh. “Fine. You can tell me your side of the story. But I’m not making any promises that I’ll feel differently. I’m only giving you the chance to share with me.”

Leo’s entire face breaks into a grin and I feel an old tug at that breathtaking smile. I steel myself not to be swayed.

“Great! Can we talk after the show tonight?”

“No. I’d rather talk now.”

I can see I caught Leo off guard. He probably planned to woo me or do something elaborate with his explanation later. Too bad. Now was as good a time as ever and I didn’t want this hanging over me all night, especially since it was only my second night performing.

“Okay, umm, I was going to hang with Jacie, but-’’

Leo sees the look on my face.

“But it’s not a problem. Let me just send her a quick text.” He takes out his phone and starts punching away and then looks up at me. “Where would you like to talk?”

“How about my bus?” It’s the only private place I can think of nearby. I definitely don’t want to go on Leo’s bus with the rest of the band.

Leo makes a face. “I don’t know if I want to talk in front of the other girls.”

“Mark moved me to Eden’s bus today. I have it all to myself.”

Leo whistles. “Damn. Good for you, Carly. Sure, that sounds great.”

“Don’t get any ideas,” I mutter darkly as we make our way out of the building.

“Wouldn’t dream of it.”

“What’s up with you and Jacie anyway?” I ask.

Leo gives me a blank look. “You know we’re related, right?”

“Yes, I had heard that somewhere.”

“She’s my cousin. We grew up together and we’re the black sheep of the family. Always letting our parents down. It made sense that we would go off together and form a band. Even as kids it was always ‘Jacie and Leo getting too dirty’ or ‘Jacie and Leo getting in trouble’ and ‘Jacie and Leo just can’t get good grades.’ ’’

I’m not really sure what to say, so I nod. I know that Leo has issues with his family not supporting him; I didn’t realize that Jacie was in the same boat.

Leo shrugs. “She’s like a sister. My actual sister was always too busy kissing ass and studying so…” he trails off not finishing his thought.

We get to the bus and I pull the door open so Leo and I can walk on. Leo appraises the bus and smiles.

“Not too shabby.”

I nod. “It’s nice,” I agree, not wanting to tell him how thrilled I actually am. I need to keep a poker face. “Can I get you something to drink?”

Leo laughs nervously, “I feel like I need a scotch, but I guess I’ll take water.”

I could care less if Leo drinks but I don’t even know what is in the kitchen on this bus. The pantry is pretty bare, but there’s some beer in the fridge.