Forever Changed (14 page)

All day I struggled with the decision to go or not. I didn’t want to betray my family, but in the end, I wound up giving my mom some vague excuse about going out, knowing she probably wouldn’t question it.

“That’s fine, dear. I can’t remember the last time you went out,” she said, playing Go Fish with Megan, which was a trial since Megan didn’t speak. The majority of the game centered on flashing the card you were seeking.

“You sure you don’t need me tonight?” I asked, looking for an excuse that would end the battle raging inside me.

“We’ll be fine,” she repeated a little defensively. “Go have fun.”

“Okay,” I said. “If you’re sure.”

“Kassandra, go.”

I grabbed my keys and purse off the loveseat where I had left them and planted a kiss on top of Megan’s head. “Ask for that one,” I said, tapping one of the cards in her hand.

“Hey,” Mom said, trying to sound indignant.

“Love you Mom,” I said laughing as I gave her a quick hug and a kiss on the cheek, which was a ritual I had felt I was too old for by the time I was ten, but had reinitiated once the accident happened.

“Drive safe and text me when you get there.”

“Gotcha,” I replied before closing the door behind me.

My smile disappeared once the door separated us. This was crazy.
I should turn around and go back inside,
I told myself, and yet, my feet seemed to have a mind of their own as they continued to propel me toward my car.

By the time I reached the garage where Maddon’s band was playing, I was a complete mess. I sat with my head resting on the steering wheel for a moment, gathering myself when a tap on the driver’s side window startled me. Looking up, I saw Maddon on the other side of the door.

“Too late to turn back now,” I mumbled to myself as I opened the door and stepped out into the cool Florida winter breeze.

“Hey,” I said, standing in front of him.

“Hey yourself. Are you okay?” he asked, looking concerned.

“I’m fine,” I said, looking up into his eyes that were as dark as the night around us.

“I’m glad you came,” he said, placing his hands on my shoulders.

“I’m still not sure it was the best idea,” I answered truthfully.

“Hey, you showed up, I’m happy,” he replied huskily in my ear.

His close proximity made it even tougher to breath. I had dated plenty of guys over the years, but had never felt so many conflicting emotions at once. My mind told me that we shouldn’t be together, but my body and heart protested otherwise.

“Come on,” he said, linking his fingers with mine. “I go on in ten minutes,” he added, dragging me toward the garage that was easily two stories high and looked like it could have housed a dozen vehicles at once.

“Wow, when you said you played in Drake’s garage, I was expecting a typical two-car garage,” I said as he placed his hand on the small of my back and guided me through the opening where the big doors had been slid to the side.

“Yeah, it’s cool his dad lets us jam here. Plus, there’s plenty of parking,” he said.

The interior of the building took me as much by surprise as the exterior. I had expected dark stinky quarters with cobwebs everywhere, but instead, the building was as bright as a grocery store and looked equally as clean. Even the dim corners where the lights didn’t quite reach looked as well kept as the rest of the space. The concrete beneath our feet looked like a broom had recently swept over it. Glancing around, I spotted a makeshift stage that was easily more than twenty feet long and ten feet wide. Several electric guitars stood on stands behind a large gleaming drum set. Wires crisscrossed along the stage, leading to the multiple instruments. A couple of guys I recognized from school were warming up on their instruments. Clumps of people stood in front of the stage chatting while they waited for the band to start.

“I need to get up there,” Maddon said, grasping my fingers momentarily in his hand. “Will you be okay?” he asked.

“Sure, I’ll be standing off to the side like a groupie, but just don’t expect me to throw my panties up on stage,” I teased.

“Well nuts, that’s the only reason I invited you along,” he joked, tugging lightly on a lock of hair before loping off toward the stage.

I watched him pull his drumsticks out of his back pocket before settling down on the small black padded stool behind the drums that dominated the stage. He looked my way and grinned before focusing on adjusting the cymbals and drums to better suit his purposes.

Surprisingly, the size of the crowd grew and their excitement along with it. I could feel it pulsating around me as I stepped back against the far wall so that the more eager groupies could swamp the area in front of the stage. Leaning back against the wall, I studied the crowd and found that most of them were students I had shared classes with over the years. They were joking around and talking, animated in their actions and obviously excited to be together. I couldn’t help comparing them with my smaller group I used to hang out with. Though we had spent a lot of time together, we never seemed to share the closeness that this group shared in their common love of the group on the stage.

Someone by the door turned off the overhead lights so that the only light sources were the large halogen lamps on either side of the stage. The lighting illuminated the band members, making them the focal point. Drake stepped up to the microphone with an electric guitar in hand.

“All right, guys, we’re Forever Changed, and we all thank you for coming out for another Thursday jam session. We appreciate your donations at the door and hope you enjoy the show,” he said, flashing a smile that gathered more than a few squeals from the crowd.

“I’ll enjoy it more if you take your shirt off,” a girl from my Algebra II class yelled.

Loud cheering followed her request. “Take your shirt off, take your shirt off,” the girls in the crowd chanted, making Drake laugh.

“Well, darling, you know I’m not that easy. You’re going to have to show your appreciation for the music before you get treated to a show,” he said, grinning wolfishly.

His comment raised several catcalls as the girls in the crowd made a show of fanning themselves.

I couldn’t help the grin that slid across my face. They looked like naturals up there.

I moved my eyes to Maddon and saw that he was looking directly at me as the group launched into their first song. I wasn’t sure what to expect when he had asked me to come hear him play, maybe a couple guys screwing around, playing songs that dominated the airwaves on most pop stations. Their music had more of a rock edge than I normally listened to, but something about it drew me in. Drake’s voice poured out through the microphone like warm honey, seducing every female in the vicinity.

Though I joined in with the crowd to whoop it up for Drake, it was Maddon behind the drums that had me enthralled as he pounded out the beat of the music effortlessly. Every so often during the chorus of the song, he would croon out the lyrics in the sexiest voice I had ever heard. Even with sweat beading up on his forehead, I had to admit, he looked hot up there. I had spent my life surrounded by sweaty individuals with my active involvement in sports, but it never looked this good on anyone.

I fought the urge to move closer to the stage so I could see him more clearly without the crowd obstructing my view. I just felt more comfortable back in the shadows.

After four songs, they took a break and Maddon hopped off the stage and headed toward me.

“So, what did you think?” he asked, taking a swig of water with sweat glistening on his forehead.

I reached up to wipe his head, but stopped myself at the last moment. His eyes darkened as he saw my attempt. He reached down and grabbed my hand. Without saying a word, he moved it up to his hair that I had been dying to touch. I ran my fingers through the damp locks, focusing on his eyes as he shifted his body, bringing us as close as possible without actually touching. I flicked my tongue out and nervously licked my lips a moment before he dropped his lips on mine. I sighed lightly as his warm supple lips claimed ownership. The air around us seemed to sizzle with desire, and he kissed me like I was a delicacy that he wanted to savor. His gentle touch was my undoing as I tightened my hold on his head, dragging him closer to me, wanting more.

He pulled back after a moment. I opened my eyes to find him studying me intently. Self-consciously, I loosened my hold on the back of his head.

“Don’t,” he said a bit raggedly.

“Don’t what?” I asked confused.

“Don’t let go of me,” he said, dropping his lips back onto mine.

The second kiss was as different as night and day as he devoured my mouth, taking everything I had to offer. I pulled him closer, wanting more, but not sure how to express it.

After a moment, he pulled back as a magnified voice broke through my kiss-induced daze.

“We'll begin the next set as soon as Maddon can untangle himself from the hot blonde in the back,” Drake teased.

“I have to get back to work,” he said, looking at me like it was the last thing he wanted to do.

“I’ll be waiting here,” I said, sagging against the wall for support since my limbs had decided to turn to Jell-O.

“That’s what I’m counting on, sweets,” he said, dropping one last quick kiss on my lips before heading back up to the stage.

The absence of his warmth left me missing something I never knew I wanted. I had always thought the loss of passion between Colton and me was my fault, like I was frigid or something, but the heat I felt for Maddon erased all those doubts.

The band's second set was better than the first, and finally, the band members gave the girls in the crowd what they wanted, stripping off their shirts during a high intensity song. I felt my jaw drop as I got a look at Maddon’s tanned glistening chest under the bright lights of the stage. Unlike the beefy bodies of the football players I was used to hanging out with, Maddon’s lean muscle and defined abs rivaled any Hollywood heartthrob.

“You’re nothing special,” a voice said beside me, breaking into my gawking session.

“What?” I asked, confused to see a girl whose name I couldn’t remember leaning against the wall next to me.

“I said, you’re nothing special. Maddon makes it a habit to hook up with girls at these jam sessions.”

“Oh?” I asked.

“Yeah, I just wanted to give you the heads-up that you’re not the first, and you won’t be the last.”

“What makes you so sure that’s not want I’m looking for,” I said, flashing a bright smile before sauntering closer to the stage. I could hear her sputtering her outrage behind me, but paid it no mind as I neared my destination.

Maddon watched me with concern as he cut his eyes back to the girl who had been talking to me. I smiled, trying to reassure him. I had put up with snarky attitudes half my life and this girl had no game.

The session ended a few minutes later after a solo from Maddon that made me wonder why I had never realized how hot it was to watch someone play the drums, or maybe it just had to be the right someone.

“Hey,” Maddon said, pulling his t-shirt on over his head.

“Hey yourself,” I said, stealing his line from before as I tried to control my breathing from his sudden closeness.

“What did Miranda say to you?” he asked, sounding serious.

“It’s not important,” I said as we left the building.

“It is important,” he said, lightly grabbing my wrist to stop me.

“Why?” I asked.

“Because I don’t want you to be scared off.”

“What makes you think she could say anything that would scare me off?” I asked.

“What did she say?” he asked miserably.

“She said I’m just a part of a long list of your conquests, and there’s nothing special about me.”

“She’s wrong.”

“About which part?” I asked, intrigued he even cared that much.

“Both,” he said earnestly. “Okay, look, I’ve had my share of girls,” he said, running his hand through his hair in frustration. “But what I feel for you isn’t even in the same hemisphere,” he added, sinking down on one of the huge boulders that boarded the garage.

“You don’t even know me,” I said, confused over his intensity.

“You keep saying that, but I do know you. I know that at one time your friends were your whole world, but now your family is. I know that you used to hide your real beauty behind teased up hair and cosmetics you didn’t need. I know that you don’t put up with shit from anyone, including friends that are as shallow as a wading pool, or asshole teachers,” he finished, shooting me a small smile as he stood up to join me.

“We don’t belong together,” I said, trying to find a reason to believe my words.

“Says who?” he asked, bringing his hands up to cup the sides of my head.

“Me, everyone,” I said, grasping at straws as he lowered his mouth to mine.

“It’s just you and me, babe,” he said, pulling back slightly. “Everyone else can deal with it or take a flying leap off a cliff.

I couldn’t believe that I was holding her in my arms and that she was responding to my kisses. I thought the night was doomed before it could really begin when I saw Miranda approach her during the session, but even that had worked out.