“Leave now Tristan. It’s easier this way,” she pleaded, she didn’t want him to hurt anymore, she didn’t want to hurt.
“I’m not leaving,” His voice dry and coarse, she could see tears forming in his eyes.
“Please Tristan. Go!” Stella cried.
“I think you should leave Tristan.” Claire’s voice came from behind her. Stella turned to Claire and ran to her bedroom, pausing at the doorway as she listened to Claire’s voice.
“I’m sorry Tristan. But if she wants you to leave, then I think its best you go,” Claire calmly spoke to Tristan.
“Why is she doing this? I didn’t mean it, I didn’t mean anything. I just love her so much. I’ve never felt like this with anyone before. I know what happened was bad, but I didn’t think we would break up over it. What’s happening Claire? I don’t understand.” Stella could hear his voice
choking,
she knew he must be crying.
“I wish I could explain it to you Tristan, I really do. But if Stella hasn’t told you then it’s not my place to say anything.”
“Told me what?”
“Something happened in her past, it changed her. She became guarded and made a promise to herself to never let herself feel like that again. She was hurt bad Tristan. It took a long time for her to even smile again. I wish I could help you. I haven’t seen Stella this happy in a long time, you’ve brought the best out in her, but you have to understand that Stella has been through things that some people will never have to experience in their life.”
“Why hasn’t she told me about it?”
“She will, when she’s ready. You have to be patient with her. She’s different around
you,
she has a hard time letting anyone in, let alone a famous celebrity like you Tristan.”
“What if I left that all behind? What if I didn’t sing anymore, would she be with me then?”
“I don’t know Tristan. But you can’t give it all up for her. It’s who you are.”
“I would give it all up, if it meant we could be together.”
Stella felt her heart break even more. She wanted Tristan to not care, to not care about her, to move on with his life.
“Look Tristan, go home, sleep on it and then try and talk to her tomorrow,” Claire said.
“But I love her Claire. I need her in my life.”
“I’m sorry Tristan…I don’t know what else to say.”
Stella pushed herself through her bedroom and fell onto the bed, crying for the pain to go away. She wanted to forget about Tristan, forget everything they once had.
***
Stella hadn’t been able to fall back to sleep after her confrontation with Tristan. She couldn’t bring herself to get up and have breakfast. She just lay there, thinking about everything that happened, replaying all their conversations. It was midday, and she knew Tristan would be leaving soon for his flight to London. He had left messages on her phone with details of his departure, hoping she would still come with him.
The accounting firm that had offered her a job position politely withdrew their offer after the weekend’s news headlines. Stella wasn’t surprised when they called to let her know, she felt relieved that they had withdrawn the offer as she didn’t want to make the decision herself whether to take the job or not. Part of her was not ready to settle down into a job she didn’t enjoy, the other part knew it had been the perfect excuse not to go with Tristan.
She loved Tristan, but after what happened she was too scared to put herself in that position again. Tristan had made her feel powerless, made her feel feelings she had buried deep inside. Tristan had brought them all to the surface and as soon as she was starting to let herself believe in love again it all fell apart.
“
Wanna
talk about it?” Claire said as she sat down on the edge of Stella’s bed.
“What’s there to say?”
“He is really upset Stella. I’ve never seen a guy so cut up before.”
“He brought it on himself,” Stella grunted. The last thing she wanted to do was feel sympathy for Tristan. She was the one who felt betrayed and heartbroken.
“He didn’t mean to hurt you Stella. You can’t hate him for wanting you to go with him to Europe.”
“That’s not the point Claire. He lied to me about it. He could have told me before the whole world found out. He just assumed I would go with him, like I had nothing better to do with my life.”
“Well I mean he does kind of have a point there, you’re not really doing much right now.”
“Claire! Whose side are you meant to be on? Anyway you saw the news headlines. Life with Tristan is complicated.”
“Hey, I’m on your side Stella. He can’t control the
media,
they are going to say whatever they want to say. You’re the last person to care about what anyone thinks anyway.” Stella knew what Claire was saying was true, she had taught herself a long time ago to not care what anyone thought or said about her.
“You have to take into consideration how he was thinking. You’ve been whinging about your life and saying how boring it was for months, so when the opportunity to make it better came up he probably expected you to be ecstatic about it.”
“It may have been boring, but that was before I got a job offer and we’ve only been together for a week! And I’m just meant to fly off with him and leave everything behind?”
“First of all, you know you didn’t want the job deep down anyway. You hate
accounting,
you just won’t admit it to yourself.” Stella opened her mouth to rebut the statement. “Second of all,” her sister continued before Stella could protest. “Life is about chance Stella. I’ve never seen you like this before with someone, and I should know, I’ve known you most of your life. You have been the happiest you’ve ever been. He makes you a better person, whether you like to admit it or not. You love him and you want to be with him. Stop making excuses and just go with your heart.”
“But it’s not that easy Claire. Last time I followed my heart you know what happened.” Stella’s tears started flowing again.
“I know Stella. I don’t want you to relive those feelings, and I’m trying my best not to bring it up. You need to focus on you and Tristan, not what happened in the past. I know you might never have closure for what happened but you can’t let it shape your future. Tristan loves you, and wants to be with you. You have to give it a
chance,
you have to live a little
Stel
. You can’t be alone for the rest of your life.”
“But I’m scared Claire.” Stella sobbed into her sister’s shoulder, “What
happens
if-”
Claire placed her finger on Stella’s lips.
“
Shhh
Stella.
It’s ok to be scared. Everyone gets scared. It will be ok, trust me. He’s not asking for your hand in marriage, he’s asking you to take a chance, to go on a wonderful holiday with him, have fun, and be free.”
Stella was silent, taking everything her sister said in. Claire was right, she knew she shouldn’t hold onto the past forever, she couldn’t blame Tristan for what happened. She wanted to go with him, there was nothing holding her here.
“What am I meant to do now? He’s probably already at the airport now getting ready for his flight.”
Claire smiled and jumped up off the bed and ran to her sister’s wardrobe. Stella watched as she reached up and grabbed the suitcase from the top shelf, pulling it down to the ground.
“Well you better bloody hurry up Stella. We’ve got a flight to catch,” Claire said excitedly.
Stella looked at her sister, then the suitcase. Was she really going to do this? Was she really going to run away with Tristan? She knew deep down she wanted to go. She took in a deep breath. She could do this. She would do this.
“Do you think I should pack summer or winter clothes?” Stella smiled.
Claire beamed a smile from ear to ear. She embraced Stella into a hug. “It will be fine Stella, just you wait and see.”
“I hope so,” she whispered, praying Tristan would take her back and forget everything that happened, and that she wasn’t going to regret this decision.
Stella’s heart pounded as they approached the international departure terminal.
“Do you think he’s here?” Stella nervously questioned Claire in the car. They pulled up outside the large sliding doors. Looking in they could see a crowd of screaming girls, security holding them back.
“He’s here alright,” Claire chuckled, amused with the situation.
“What am I meant to do? Just walk up to him, and say ‘hey, I’m coming with you’?” Stella said feeling her nerves get to her.
“Sure, you can do that.” Claire smiled at her as Stella frowned at her response. “It doesn’t matter what you do Stella, he’s going to love you anyway. You just have to get his attention and go from there. After talking to him last night, I think he will be overjoyed you came.”
“Your right,” Stella said. Claire always had a way of putting things in a better
perspective,
she gave her confidence that she didn’t think she had.
“Of course I’m right,” Claire said laughing as she jumped out of the car to retrieve Stella’s suitcase from the boot.
“Well here goes nothing,” Stella said as she opened the car door, preparing herself for the craziness ahead.
She hugged her sister goodbye. “Thanks Claire, for everything.”
“Anytime sis, good luck!
And don’t forget, next time I’m coming with you!” she said, hugging her once more.
Stella took a deep breath, picking up the suitcase handle so she could pull it along and turned to the doors. She walked forward slowly, her heart beating out of her chest. She took one last look over her shoulder at Claire, who smiled and nodded.
“You can do this,” Stella said to herself. She took another step forward and the sliding doors opened, she quickly spotted the group of girls on the far side of the airport. She could see the crowd moving.
She continued walking, quickening her pace as she saw the crowd moving further away. In that moment she saw Tristan. He was with Ben, Sam and a team of security guards. They were talking amongst themselves. As she started pushing through the crowd with her suitcase she felt herself not being able to move anymore, the crowd was too dense. Panic started setting in when she looked up and saw the security guards form a barrier against the crowd, Tristan waved goodbye and turned down the corridor, the crowd stopped from going any further.
“Tristan!” she called.
“Tristan!”
He didn’t turn back, she looked around.
Of course he wouldn’t turn back, every other girl is screaming the same thing,
she thought.
She needed to do something fast, or else he was gone and she didn’t know how she would get him back once he was on that plane to London. She looked at the security guards, there was no way she would be able to get any closer, and she knew the crowd would only stop once Tristan was gone.
She looked around, searching for an answer and then she saw the nearby check-in counter. She moved herself out from the crowd so she was on the outside below the counter. She dropped her suitcase and climbed up on the counter.
“Tristan!” she screamed with all her might. He kept walking, ignoring her cries. The security had seen her though and they started running towards her. The only way out was to run across the counter and run to him as fast as she could, before she got caught. It’s now or never. She was either going to be in his arms by the end of this, or be arrested.
She took her chance and started sprinting across the counter, jumping between each counter. She could hear the screams from the security behind her and the gasping from the onlookers. As she reached the end counter she leaped through the air screaming Tristan’s name. She hit the ground running. “Tristan!” she shouted in despair. She needed him to turn around.
Please turn around!
she
thought. And as if he had heard her thoughts he turned his face to hers.
But before she even had time to read his face a security guard crashed into her, sending her to the ground. They grabbed her arms and pinned them to her back, stopping her from moving, her face buried into the ground.
“Get off her!
Now!”
Tristan’s face called from behind her as her arms were freed. She turned her body on the ground to see Tristan pulling the security guard off her, his face full of rage as he backed him up against the
wall,
Ben and Sam were quickly at his side pulling him away.
Stella pulled herself up, as Tristan turned his attention away and back to Stella. Without hesitation she flew into his arms.
“I’m sorry Tristan.” She found herself sobbing into his shoulder.
“You’re here. You’re actually here. I thought I’d lost you.” He pulled her head back kissing her lips fiercely, and then hugging her again.
“You did. But I’m here now. I want to try again.”
Tristan held her face with his hands, his thumb wiping away her tears. “You know I would never intentionally hurt you Stella. Everything that happened, I’m so sorry.”
“I know you are. I’m sorry I am the way I am. I don’t deal with these emotions very well. I always have the thought in the back of my mind that it won’t work, because of me.
Because of my past.”
“I love who you are Stella. I’m sorry you had to go through what you did to make you so guarded and so scared to love. But I promise you, whatever
happened,
I’ll never let that happen to you again. I’ll take care of you Stella. I’ll protect you.”
“I want to tell you what happened. I just don’t know how,” she choked on her tears.
“
Shhh
.
It’s ok. You don’t have to tell me
now,
you can tell me when you’re ready. But right now, it’s you and me.
Our present, our future.
Whatever happens, we’ll face it together. ”
A faint smile formed on Stella’s lips. “That’s why I’m here. I’m coming with you.
If you want me to?”
He smiled the biggest smile she’d ever seen and picked her up swinging her around in his arms. “Of course I want you to come! This is going to be amazing Stella.” He set her back down on her feet.