Forgive Me (29 page)

While lying in the bath, I think about everything I’ve been through in the last three weeks. Its unreal it was exactly three weeks ago I was packing to head to Texas. How much of my life that has changed since that day is unbelievable. Yet, here I am, in the same home, doing the same damn thing I was before I left.

“You’re heading in early,” Nan mentions when I walk into the kitchen early the next morning.

I pour myself a glass of juice and smile at her. “I may as well get a head start on everything.”

“You look a lot better than you did yesterday. I thought maybe you were just heartbroken, but it seems you just needed some rest.”

After taking a sip of my drink, I place the cup back down on the table and stare at Nan, who is reading the newspaper and acting like she didn’t just blurt that out. “Why would I be heartbroken?”

She peeks up over the paper at me and shrugs. “I just figured with seeing Justin’s dad after all these years would bring up old feelings is all. You looked all glum and dejected last night, I assumed you were heartbroken. Turns out I was wrong.”

Nan goes back to reading her paper and I don’t say anything, not knowing what to say. Instead I finish my juice then place my cup in the sink. “Well, I’m headed to the office, you got Justin or you want me to call up one of his friends?”

“I got the boy, you go.”

I give her a kiss on the cheek and leave the house. Justin is still sleeping, so I won’t bother waking him.

I stare at the name Ronald Peabody and I don’t want to knock on the door. He wasn’t impressed with my
vacation
, as he called it, even though it was obviously more than that. He is a crude man, and is very egotistical. He is a great boss most days, especially for someone like me who doesn’t do much to disappoint him. Which is how I got promoted so high up in the business. Which is also why I’m nervous to come and speak with him.

Taking a few deep breaths in and out, I finally knock on his door. I hear him grumble something about coming in, so I open the door and peek my head inside.

“Oh, good, Lexi, you’re back. Good to see you! I thought you had another week off.”

I walk in, closing the door behind me, and make my way towards his desk. “Yeah, well sadly my mom went a little faster than the doctor suspected.”

He looks a little solemn before he points to the seat across from his desk, in which I take a seat in. “Sorry to hear about your mother, but I have to admit that I’m pleased you’re back. The past couple weeks have been chaotic and I need you out there getting things back in working order. We can’t do this without you, Lexi, I hope you realize what an asset you are to this company.”

“Which is what makes this so hard.”

The air in the room thickens immediately as the silence around me becomes deafening.

“Mr. Peabody, I’m sorry to do this to you, but I got a job offer in Arlington that I cannot refuse, and I have family there that needs me, as I need them. Justin’s father is there as well, and we’ve come to an agreement of split custody, in which would be easier if we lived in the same state. I have to tell you that I appreciate my time here, and everything you’ve done for me, and I apologize immensely for doing this to you, especially without notice, but we’re leaving on Tuesday to go back. Therefore, I’m unable to even give you my two weeks.”

He looks livid, and honestly, I cannot blame him. He stands from behind his desk and shakes his head. “Ms. Bennett, please clear out your desk and leave the premise immediately. Anything you need from this company can be dealt with by contact HR.”

I stand up and try to smile. “Again, I apologize Mr. Peabody. I hate doing this to you. I owe you greatly.”

He doesn’t nod his head or show me any other acknowledgment, so I turn around and leave his office, feeling a pain inside but knowing I’m doing the right thing. I knew it was the right thing before it was even done.

I had talked with Zander Wednesday when he picked up Justin. I told him that I chose Texas, but not just for him. I wanted Justin to have his dad and his family. I wanted him to be able to work part time at the farm or Plantation during vacations, until he was old enough to have a part time job. I wanted to be close to my family again. It all made sense to move back home.

Yeah, I said it… home.

So Zander told me that he knew of someone who had a job opening, and even though I hadn’t ever dreamed of being a receptionist, it was something that paid well enough, especially since I’ll be living with my dad for now, so I can save my money up. We agreed to every other weekends with Justin, and to being friends with one another.

I had called Nan up once Zander had taken off, and she was sad to know I’d be sticking around but was thrilled that I finally connected with my family and said she’d be nothing but supportive of me. We also had a long talk, because she is getting to the age she’s going to need help functioning in the next few years. She made promises that if it got to be too much, she’d move into a nursing home or at least an ‘old folks home’ as she called it. It made me feel good she knows that she can only take care of herself for so long.

Everyone was happy for us, and in return, I was even happier with the situation.

“I think that is everything,” I say to Kenneth. He is one of our neighbors and helped me put things into the moving truck. He is an older man, maybe fifty five, and although he is about fifteen years younger than Nan, I always wished the two would get together.

“Alright kiddo. I’m sure going to miss you.” He pulls me in for a hug and I return it. He was like an uncle to me over the years, one that helped me out if I were desperate enough to ask someone for it.

“I’ll miss you too. Please keep an eye on Nan.”

He smiles at me. “I sure will. Please keep us updated. I’d like pictures now again. Or better yet, why don’t you get on one of those Facebook things.”

I grin at him and a peace of mind takes over. I can finally have social networking with fear of being found. “I think I’ll do just that once I get settled in. I’ll make sure to look for you.”

We chat for a few more minutes before Justin and Nan make their way outside. “Truck is loaded and ready to go.”

Nan nods her head, looking at the large truck taking up residence on the curb in front of her home. "What time will that thing be gone?”

“Nine a.m. is what I was told.” I hired a moving company to take the truck of my belongings down to Texas, too scared to make the drive myself. I paid to insure the truck, which covers everything inside of it, but even so I’m pretty nervous about something happening to my belongings. Thankfully I don’t have anything super valuable or any furniture, its mostly clothes, books, Justin’s sports equipment- things that can be replaced easy enough, given the right amount of money.

“Good. Your plane leaves in three hours, we should probably get you to the airport so you can get checked in.”

We say bye to Kenneth, and make our way into Nan’s car. She drives us to the airport, and when she drops us off, I can’t help but break into tears. “I promise I’ll come visit,” I tell her between sobs.

“You hush up, you hear. You’re going to make an old woman cry. I’ll see you when I see you, and if I don’t, its been a fun ride.” When I pull away from her I give her a small glare and she chuckles. “Go on now, I’m gonna push you on outta here if you don’t get going.”

With a sigh, I exit the car and allow Justin to climb into the front seat to hug and kiss Nan as well. I feel bad I’m taking him away from his grandmother, but I know he is going to find it worth it once he gets to see his dad and the rest of the family all the time.

This plane ride was much better as I was able to actually read without my mind drifting, while Justin watched the movie that was playing. When we land in Texas, I look all around for Clay’s car, as he said he would be picking me up. I glance at my cellphone to make sure we didn’t land too early or too late, but its almost right on time. Maybe he is running late.

That is when a lifted black pickup truck grabs at my attention. I smack Justin’s arm and point. “It looks like your dad is the one to pick us up.” That perks Justin up even more, and the two of us make our way in that direction.

As we get close, Zander climbs out of the truck and makes his way in our direction. He grabs our carry-ons out of Justin’s grip and one of the suitcase’s I’m currently holding. He throws them into the bed of the truck and turns to Justin. “How was your flight kiddo?”

Justin shrugs, pretty exhausted already. “Fine, there was a good movie on, so I didn’t notice how long it was this time.”

“Well, I was planning on bringing the two of you out to eat and then maybe to the movies, but if you’re too tired, we can do it tomorrow or a different day?”

Justin grins happily, “Not too tired. I’m pretty hungry actually.”

He laughs. “Alright, then get in, we’ll go wherever you want to eat.”

Justin listens by climbing into the backseat and closing the door.

Zander reaches for the suitcase in my hand, and tosses that into the bed of the truck as well. “And how was the flight for you?”

“Better than the one there,” I admit.

He turns to face me, and before I know what is happening, he grabs the back of my head and pulls me into him. My lips feel like magic against his and I dissolve right into him, throwing my arms around his shoulders. He grabs at my hips and I hop up until my feet wrap around his waist.

Yes, I’m most definitely home.

A dream you dream alone is only a dream.

A dream you dream together is reality.

-John Lennon

My fingers slide perfectly into his as we make our way out back of Bray’s house. It’s her birthday weekend and she is having a pool party. I don’t think I’ve ever been more excited to swim in a pool before, because hers is way more than a pool. It doesn’t hold any certain shape, its just this really awesome curvy pool, and at the end of one side are three steps that bring you into her round Jacuzzi.

Bray said she didn’t exactly want kids here today because she knew there would be a lot of drinking, so we left Justin back home with my dad. He has no problem keeping Justin with him, because the two of them have become the best of buds. My dad came home one day from the store with a bag full of model cars, paint, and all the other things you need to put the models together- and from there on out, Justin and him have bonded in a special way I just didn’t expect.

We’ve only been back a month, but this month has made a world of difference in our lives. School starts on Monday, and Justin is very anxious about that, in which I don’t blame him. He has made a couple friends with kids on our street, which makes me so happy for him, and I know he’ll make more once it starts. Once he sheds away his shyness, he is an outgoing, silly child, and makes easy connections with people.

The day we arrived back in Texas, Zander brought us out to dinner and the movies as he promised Justin, but the poor kid fell asleep half way through the movie. It was at the theater too, not the drive-in, but he seemed comfortable enough all balled up in his seat. Zander had sat in the middle of us, again, and while I was munching on some popcorn, he reached over and held my hand. I looked up into those dazzling eyes of his, and he leaned forward, pressing his lips to me. When he pulled his mouth back, he rested his nose against mine and whispered, “We need to go to the movies more often.”