Forgiving Hearts: Duncurra 1-3 (39 page)

“Aye, I suppose it is.”

Annag smiled and shook her head. “Mairead, ye are more tired than usual, with sick some days, and yer monthly is well overdue. Eight babies have been born at Carraigile in the last five years. Did ye learn nothing from yer sisters?”

“I’m going to have a baby?” Mairead asked, dumbfounded.

Annag laughed. “I suspect ye are, little sister. Ye will need to check with a midwife when ye get home to be completely sure.”

Elspet said, “Katy will see to ye. Oh, of all years for Ian to be left in charge of Cnocreidh. Rest now, I’ll go get something for ye to eat.”

“I’m done resting for the day. I’ll be out shortly.”

“Now I know ye are well, pet, I need to get back. The lads went with Hogan’s men to watch the competition, but I left a maid watching Wynne and there’s no telling what that wee lass will get up to.”

They walked out of the tent together, and Mairead hugged her before Annag left, accompanied by her MacBain escort. Mairead said to Pol and Cael, “Elspet was going to prepare something for me to eat. Will ye join me?”

“My lady, are ye sure ye are well enough? The laird said we were to make sure ye rested,” said Cael.

Mairead gave her best imitation of Jock. “Cael, lad, I’m right as nails, and I’m famished.”

“Are ye?” said Pol with a suspicious smirk. “Then I suppose we need to find something for ye to eat.”

“But Pol—”

“Ye heard the lady, Cael, she’s ‘as right as nails.’” Pol offered her his arm, and they crossed the camp to the cooking fires. As they approached, Meriel and Gallia were animatedly discussing their day at the fair. Meriel looked appalled. “The things some lasses will do, ’tis shocking.”

“What is shocking, Meriel?”

“Oh, my lady, I’m sorry, I didn’t see ye there.”

Gallia said, “My lady, we were walking through the stalls, and we saw a lad tupping a lass behind one of them. Practically right out in the open.”

“Gallia!” said her father.

“Was he hurting her?” asked Mairead in a worried tone.

“I’d say not, judging by the way she kept moaning his name, ‘Rafer, oh Rafer,’” said Meriel.

“We thought for a moment it was Eavan—she had the red hair like Eavan’s,” said Gallia, glancing contritely at her father before adding, “Mama was there, too.”

“But it wasn’t Eavan. A few minutes later the lass came from behind the stall, straightening her clothes as bold as brass,” said Meriel.

“That’s enough out of both of ye,” said Pol. “Lady Matheson doesn’t need to hear this.”

“No, I suppose not, but ye are right, Meriel, ’tis shocking.” Mairead grinned conspiratorially, and both young women giggled in spite of Pol’s scowl.

~ * ~

The Matheson men who participated in the sword fighting tournament returned in the early evening, tired, bruised, and in some cases bloodied, but with no serious injuries.

“Who was the victor?” Mairead asked.

“It came down to the laird, Rowan, and Darcy Fraser,” Flan announced excitedly.

“Well, what happened?”

“The laird bested Darcy Fraser, but Rowan won over the laird!” Flan shouted with glee.

“Flan, lad, ye aren’t supposed to be happy when yer laird loses,” said Tadhg.

“I’m sorry, Laird, but Rowan is my brother.”

“But I’m yer brother by marriage and yer laird. Where’s yer loyalty?” Flan looked embarrassed. “Ah, don’t worry, lad, I’m not serious. Rowan is my brother by marriage too, and ye can be very proud of him. He is an excellent swordsman.”

Mairead gave Tadhg a quick kiss. “Congratulations. Well done. I think this calls for a celebration.” She gave him a saucy grin and teased, “after all, Rowan is my brother too.” The Mathesons laughed and joined in the ribbing.

Taking it with good humor, Tadhg said, “I wonder if Darcy is getting the same taste of humility I am. After all, his sister is to be Rowan’s bride.”

“I suspect so, if she recognizes her good fortune,” said Mairead.

Laughing, Tadhg pulled her close. “Aye, those of us lucky enough to marry MacKenzies are fortunate indeed.” To his clan’s delight, he kissed her soundly. “And how is my wee bride tonight? Ye look much less drawn than ye did this morning. Did ye rest?”

“Aye, I rested and I’m feeling better. However, the smell of ye is enough to make me lightheaded again.”

“Lads, I think we have just been told to wash.” Laughing, Tadhg let go of her.

“We have something of a feast prepared so don’t be too long at the loch,” Mairead said.

When the men returned, freshly scrubbed, the celebration began, continuing late into the night. Well before the festivities were over, Mairead’s eyes began to droop. Tadhg caressed her cheek. “Come, lass, I think ye may have overdone it a bit. Ye have been ill, and I should have taken ye to bed hours ago.” He lifted her and carried her to their tent.

“Ye don’t need to carry me, Tadhg.”

“Don’t argue with me, love. Ye started the morning pale and retching.” He laid her gently on their pallet.

She couldn’t help but grin. “Aye, I did, but I’m not ill.”

He sat back on his heels, looking confused. “If ye aren’t ill, why were ye retching?”

“Well, Annag and Elspet think I’m pregnant.”

“We’re having a bairn?”

“So it seems. Elspet says I should check with Katy when we return home to confirm it. We probably shouldn’t tell anyone until we know for sure.”

He pulled her into his arms and kissed her. “Oh, Mairead, I love ye so. I’m thrilled.”

“I am too. For years I didn’t let myself even think of marrying, much less having children of my own. Then ye came along. Ye helped me put the past behind me, but more than that, ye helped me see my own worth and strength. Tadhg, ye have made me so happy. I can’t begin to tell ye how much I love ye.”

Tadhg kissed Mairead awake the next morning well after the sun was up. “How are ye feeling, love?”

“Honestly, a bit queasy, but not as bad as yesterday.”

“Are ye feeling up to rising now? We need to travel to Duncurra today. The men are packing up, and I’ve left this tent until last, but if ye still need to rest we can wait.”

“Can I ride with ye again today?”

“Of course ye can.”

“Then I’ll be fine.”

“Shall I send Elspet or Gallia to help ye?”

“Nay, just give me a few minutes.” Mairead dressed and stepped out of the tent. As Tadhg had said, most everything was packed except for their tent. She was frankly amazed she had slept through all of the activity. In fact, looking around it became obvious many of the Mathesons had already left.

“Tadhg, where did everyone go?”

“Only ye, Flan, and I will attend the wedding, accompanied by an appropriate escort. Most of the rest of the clan will be traveling back to Cnocreidh today, so they left earlier.”

Mairead nibbled on an oatcake while their final belongings were packed. Thankfully, her stomach quieted by the time they were ready to leave, but she still chose to ride with Tadhg. After several hours, Duncurra came into view as they exited the forest, which lay northwest of it. Built on a steep crag that jutted into Loch Craos, Duncurra was surrounded by water on three sides, and a huge open heath lay on the northern edge of its village. They had to ride for an hour before they neared its gates. A number of encampments had sprouted up on the heath outside Duncurra’s walls. Mairead assumed these housed the men-at-arms who accompanied the wedding guests as had been done at Cnocreidh when she and Tadhg were married, but this wasn’t the case. Tadhg explained, “Duncurra is considerably smaller than Cnocreidh. I’m sure Niall will make rooms available to any of the visiting lairds and their wives who would wish to come, but most visitors will stay in the encampments with their men-at-arms. I suspect yer parents, Laird and Lady Chisholm, Laird and Lady Munro, Laird and Lady Urquhart, and of course Laird Fraser and Eara will stay within the keep.

“What about Annag and Hogan?”

“Hogan told me they will stay in the encampment. With all yer other siblings and their families staying outside the walls, I suspect they want the children to spend as much time together as possible.”

“And where will we stay?” Mairead rather liked the idea of staying outside the walls with the bulk of her family and surrounded by their guardsmen and men-at-arms.

“We will be staying within the keep.” Perhaps sensing her wistfulness, Tadhg added, “If ye would prefer to stay in the encampment, it can be arranged. However, I think both Katherine MacIan and yer mother will be terribly disappointed if we do. It isn’t as if ye won’t be seeing a good deal of the whole family while we’re here. Tonight there is to be a feast in the hall for honored guests that yer family will attend, tomorrow there will be a huge Roodmas feast, and two days later the wedding.”

“I suppose ye are right.” Doubtlessly he was right about her mother and she certainly wouldn’t wish to offend Lady MacIan by declining her hospitality, either. When they arrived at the keep, she was glad she hadn’t insisted they encamp with the clan. Katherine MacIan greeted her as warmly as a sister would and seemed genuinely pleased to see her.

“Oh, Mairead, I’m so glad ye’re here. Yer mother has been a godsend. I thought it was a brilliant idea to hold Rowan’s wedding here. He is so lovely and a truly great addition to Niall’s guard, but I don’t know the first thing about weddings. Yers is the first one I ever attended.”

Mairead laughed. “What about yer own wedding?”

“Ah, well, that wasn’t what ye’d call a celebration now, was it? King David rather forced the issue. I found myself married and on my way to the Highlands in the blink of an eye.”

“Do ye still hold that against me, sweetling?” Laird MacIan asked as he slipped his arms around her.

“Niall, I didn’t know ye were there, but ye know I’ve never held it against ye. Ye saved me.”

“As I recall, ’twas ye did the saving.”

“Well, the details on who saved whom are a bit muddy, the fact remains I really don’t know much about weddings, but yer mother has been wonderful, Mairead. She has been anxious for ye to arrive all day. I’ll show ye to yer chamber and then shall we go find her?” Katherine looped her arm through Mairead’s, prepared to draw her away, when Tadhg stopped her.

“Katherine, I’m sure Lady MacKenzie is anxious to see Mairead, but I want Mairead to take a bit of a rest first.”

Katherine arched an eyebrow at him. “Do ye? Well, perhaps ye should have a chat with Niall about the wisdom of ordering a woman to rest. Visiting with her mama is not likely to overtax her.” Tadhg looked momentarily stunned, Niall laughed uproariously, and Mairead giggled, allowing Katherine to draw her toward the tower stairs. Katherine called over her shoulder to Tadhg, “Ye can come too if ye wish.”

Katherine showed them to a cozy room on the third floor of the east tower and the rest of the afternoon passed in a flurry of activity. As he had promised, Tadhg stayed close to Mairead. They returned to their bedchamber only briefly to prepare for the feast that evening. Even with only the families of the betrothed and the leadership from the other visiting clans, the great hall was packed. It was wonderful but exhausting to be surrounded by her family once again. Perhaps noticing her weariness, Tadhg leaned in to her ear and said softly, “Katherine said I couldn’t order ye to rest, but she said nothing about throwing ye over my shoulder and hauling ye off to bed.”

“Ye wouldn’t,” Mairead squeaked.

Tadhg chuckled. “Nay, but I think we should say our goodnights. Ye look ready to collapse.”

~ * ~

The next day started reverently with Mass celebrating the Holy Cross, but the day progressed with more secular celebrations of the coming of summer. It culminated in a feast, which spread out of the castle and into the courtyard. Ale flowed freely and there were musicians and dancing both inside and out. Although invited, the tall auburn-haired warrior had not joined the guests in the hall the previous evening and had no intention of doing so tonight either. He preferred to spend the evening drinking outside with his father’s men and perhaps finding a maid to have a tumble with. Losing the sword-fighting tournament to both Rowan MacKenzie and Tadhg Matheson still rankled; he certainly didn’t want to sit at a table with them and make polite conversation.
At least the ale is plentiful.
His cousin Guthrie sidled up to him and asked, “What ails ye, coz?”

“That purse for the sword fighting tournament should have been mine. I lost my footing or Matheson never would have bested me. I could have beaten Rowan MacKenzie just as I did last September at the Michaelmas Fair.”

“Coz, it seems this is the second time Matheson has beat ye to a prize.”

“Ye mean the betrothal Da wanted? Matheson did me a favor there. I didn’t want to marry MacKenzie’s Mouse. I hear she is as plain as she is timid. Imagine bedding that every night for the rest of yer life?”

“Ye haven’t seen her, have ye?”

“Nay, I’ve no interest.”

“Well, Coz, I think ye might change yer mind once ye have.

“What makes ye say that?”

“I was in the courtyard when Laird and Lady Matheson arrived yesterday and she is certainly not what I would call plain. Waking up next to her would be no chore at all.”

“Still, there are plenty of bonny lassies who can warm my bed.

“Aye, but if I’m not much mistaken, Lady Matheson is none other than the lass responsible for yer broken nose.”

“The wench from years ago at the Michaelmas Fair?”

“Filled out a bit from the scrawny piece she was, but aye, one and the same.”

“Did she see ye? Did she recognize ye?”

“Do ye take me for an eejit, Darcy? As soon as I recognized her, I made sure she didn’t get a look at me. She might not remember us after all these years, but I thought it best not to take the chance. Although, since her brother is marrying yer sister, I’m not sure how ye are going to avoid her seeing ye. She is bound to recognize ye at some point.”

“I have no intention of hiding from the wench, Guthrie.”

“If that lass causes a ruckus over the little incident from years ago, both Cathal MacKenzie and Tadhg Matheson are like to call us out. Yer da will not be pleased if anything interferes with this wedding.”

“Then I just have to make sure she doesn’t cause a ruckus. She didn’t the last time.”

“She was probably afraid.”

“Or ashamed. I suspect she will be no more anxious to be labeled a wanton now than she was then. I just have to get her alone for a while and remind her of that little detail.”

~ * ~

Meriel had never attended a feast anywhere but at Cnocreidh. It was thrilling. She and her sister, Finola, wandered around the courtyard listening to the music and watching the dancing. Meriel laughed when a tall, handsome warrior with auburn hair pulled her sister into a conversation.

“I think I am in love,” he declared. “What is yer name, fair lass?”

“Finola,” her sister said with a saucy grin.

“Finola. What a lovely name for a lovely lass. To what clan do ye belong, lass? Are ye a MacKenzie, or perhaps one of the MacIans?

“Nay. I’m a Matheson. My da is one of Laird Matheson’s guardsmen.”

“Did ye hear that, Guthrie?” he called to his companion. “She is a Matheson. Are all the Matheson lasses as fine of form as ye?”

Finola giggled.

“Finola, ye will break my heart if ye don’t dance with me and perhaps let me steal a wee kiss from yer sweet lips.”

Meriel stepped in, looping her arm through her sister’s. She pulled her away, saying, “Finola, I think Da is looking for us.”

“Nay, he isn’t. Meriel, let go of me, ye are spoiling my fun,” Finola hissed, yanking her arm.

Meriel held her firmly, “Finola, ye—”

“Leave me be, Meriel. Ye think ye are so high and mighty. Ye are just jealous because he wants to dance with me.” Finola finally twisted out of Meriel’s grasp and allowed the young warrior to pull her into the dance.

Meriel thought there was probably no harm in it, but in order to keep an eye on her sister, she climbed the steps to the keep to have a better view of the courtyard. The doors to the great hall were open so she leaned against one and settled in to watch the dancing. As she stood there, in the light spilling from within, a couple just inside the doors was having a heated conversation. Her ears perked at the sound of the name “Rafer”. She chuckled remembering, “Rafer, oh Rafer,” from the fair. She ceased to be amused as she overheard more of the conversation.

“Rafer, ye know I only want ye.”

“That’s not what it looks like to me.”

“It’s only an act. I have no choice.”

“Then tell yer da ye don’t want this before it is too late.”

“I’ve told him before. I can’t change his mind.”

“I can’t bear to lose ye. How can I live without ye, my own heart?”

“Maybe there is a way ye don’t have to.”

“I can’t see how, short of yer betrothed dying suddenly, and that isn’t likely to happen.”

“Nay, it isn’t, and it wouldn’t fix the problem anyway. Da wants this alliance badly enough to foist me off on one of the other two.”

“Then what did ye have in mind?”

“’Tis common knowledge, Laird MacIan recently sent a number of his men-at-arms to serve his brother. Perhaps if he is shorthanded, he would consider taking ye on. If ye were here, we could continue to see each other.”

“Aye, we could at that. Then too, perhaps yer new husband might meet with an unfortunate accident eventually. As a widow, not living in yer father’s keep, ye would have much more freedom to choose yer next husband.”

“Ye know, love, after I am married, ye can spill yer seed in me. He’ll assume any bairn is his.”

“I’ve wanted nothing more from the start, but he’ll be first.”

“He doesn’t have to be.”

“What are ye saying?”

“The wedding is the day after tomorrow. It is close enough we don’t have to worry anymore. I will meet ye tonight, Rafer, and ye can make love to me without holding back.”

“Do ye mean it, love? Where shall we meet? There are so many people here, how can ye get away?”

“I will meet ye in the chapel. Ye can slip away and hide yerself there. I will come when I can.”

“How will ye get away?”

“If anyone asks where I am going, I will simply tell them I need time for prayer and solitude before taking my wedding vows. We will be left alone.”

“Do ye mean for us to—I mean, do ye really think we should—ye know, in the chapel?”

“I didn’t know ye were such a devout man, Rafer, but if ye don’t want to...”

“I never said I didn’t want to. I adore ye. I’ll be there.”

Meriel stepped quickly into the shadow of one of the massive doors just as the man, whom she recognized from the fair, rushed out and disappeared into the crowd. What they were planning was horrible, but she had no idea what to do about it.
Mind my own business. That’s what I should do
. But how could she ignore this? She remembered Rowan MacKenzie from his visit to Cnocreidh at Christmas. He had danced with her and had seemed so nice. Also, Lady Matheson had been so kind to her and Rowan was her brother. He didn’t deserve this. There was no doubt in her mind that someone should say something, but there was only one person who knew anything about it.
Me
.