Forgiving You: A Bluebell Valley Novel (10 page)

Sam

Her alarm started ringing and Sam opened one eye painfully. She didn’t want to get out of bed. She didn’t want to leave the only place where she could stay without crying constantly. Under her blankets, life didn’t seem so bad. It was only her and her bed, and nobody else. Especially not Austin.

But Sam had to go to work. She had tomorrow off, so today was her last day. It had already been a week since Austin had left, but the scar was still there. Sam couldn’t believe she’d been stupid enough to believe him again. She should have known. She hated herself for making the same mistake twice.

As she sat up, she put her head in her hands, not knowing how she was going to get over Austin again. It had been so hard the first time, but it was even harder this time around. He’d made her so happy, even if it was only for an instant. He’d put a kind of light in her heart she didn’t think she could find again. He’d made her feel loved and desired.

But all of that had been fake. She didn’t matter to him. She wasn’t important enough.

Dragging herself out of bed and into the shower, Sam made the decision that today was the last day she would think about him. She just had to forget everything that happened and go back to her old self. Wasn’t that the solution?

It worked for a moment, enough to get her dressed and out of her apartment.

As soon as she stepped out the door and into the street, all her memories came crashing back, like a big wave swallowing her into the deepest parts of the ocean. In front of her, she could see where Austin had parked his car, waiting to pick her up. He’d looked at her with so much love in his eyes. How could that have been fake?

But he was gone, so Sam kept walking. Keeping her head up was hard. The streets were still dark and she was alone, as everybody else was still sound asleep. For the next hour, she wouldn’t have to talk or see anybody. As soon as she made it to the bakery, it would be her and her ovens.

As she turned the corner that led to the main street, she found herself right in front of the liquor store where they’d met for the first time. She stopped walking, taking a moment to look through the window at the wine section, wondering if she should have stuck with her first thought of never seeing Austin again. She wouldn’t have gotten her heart broken again, but then she would never have felt so alive, even if it was just for a week.

But why did such a thing needed to come at such a high cost?

Sam decided to keep walking as she felt the tears coming back in her eyes. No, she had to forget about Austin. She was a strong woman and would figure out how to be happy by herself, since men couldn’t be trusted. Whatever she needed to do, she would do it. And she would start right after her first cup of coffee, because nothing good ever happened before that.

As she finally arrived in front of the bakery, her best friend was waiting for her.

“April? What are you doing here?”

“I thought you’d like some company this morning,” she said as she gave Sam a hug.

“It’s very sweet of you, but I’m good,” Sam lied. “And don’t you usually get one more hour of sleep than me? You should go back to bed.”

“It doesn’t matter. Come on, let’s go in and talk. You owe me breakfast, by the way.”

It put a smile on Sam’s face as she pushed the door, letting April go in first. She didn’t know how she would survive without her best friend. She owed her more than just breakfast.

As Sam was working, April was sitting on a chair by the wall, sipping on a cup of coffee. For the next hour, the two women talked mostly of things that had happened recently in Bluebell Valley, taking Sam’s mind off of Austin. It worked better than she expected, and she found herself in a good mood by the time April had to leave.

“There you go, I’ve done my job,” April said as she stood up.

“Your job?”

“To make you smile,” April said, making the smile on Sam’s lips even wider.

“Thank you so much. You’re the best.”

They hugged again, Sam not wanting to let go. By now, April was like family to her. She was the sister she never had.

“You’re not going to leave me, are you?”

“Never.”

“Good!” Sam said as she hugged her friend more tightly for a second. “I’ll see you later for lunch?”

“I’ll bring the wine bottle this time. A glass or two shouldn’t hurt, even if it’s in the afternoon.”

They both laughed before April started walking toward the door. As she pulled it opened, she turned back to look at Sam, who was leaning against the counter.

“You have the power to decide if you’re going to be happy, Sam. Don’t waste it on being miserable, okay?”

Sam nodded, her friend’s words echoing in her brain as she watched her leave. April was right. Even if Sam saw Austin everywhere she looked, she was the one deciding how that was going to affect her mood. Of course, being happy wasn’t easy at the moment—the natural thing for her was to crawl back in bed and watch
Notting Hill
on repeat. But she had to do it. She had to get herself back on track.

After unlocking the front door, Sam retreated to her office. Her mother was going to be here soon and she didn’t want to face her. Not yet. Not this early. Besides, there was a ton of paperwork on her desk.

As she closed the door behind her and sat down, Sam felt the confidence leave her body. How was she going to do this? She wanted to forget about Austin so badly, but everything around her reminded her of him. Now it was her office, where they’d spent some time together earlier last week. She could still feel Austin’s kisses on her face, how soft his hair was between her fingers. Looking down at her hands, Sam realized she couldn’t stay in the office any longer. She needed air.

She decided to sit in the oven room, where nobody would find her. As she looked up, wondering what she was going to do with her life, she noticed her jar. Actually, she noticed what was in her jar. All of her money was gone, replaced by what looked like a note. She stood up and grabbed the jar, wondering who’d left with her money. Even before she opened it, she knew who it was.

Dear Sam,

I assumed you wouldn’t mind me taking your $83.47 and put it toward a plane ticket. You now have a $3,000 credit with Delta Airlines that you can use whenever you feel like it. Just call them and they’ll book the flight for you.

Love,

Austin

When had he left that note? Reading it again, she was so confused. She didn’t want his money. She wanted her $83.47 back. Going to Italy on Austin’s dime didn’t seem fair to her, especially since they’d broken up. She didn’t want anything of his. She just wanted to go back to her normal life.

Deciding she wouldn’t be able to do any office work today, she grabbed her jar, put it in her purse with the note, and scribbled something quickly for her mother when she would come in. Sam couldn’t stay in this place for a second longer.

As she opened the front door to leave, she ran into her mother, who was coming into the store. Sam didn’t bother saying anything—her mother could read the note she’d left for her.

Sam started running toward her apartment, feeling the tears coming again. There was nothing she wanted less than to start crying, but it happened anyway. She had to slow her pace, feeling her throat get smaller and smaller with each breath she took. Finally walking again, she tried to relax, breathing in and out. By the time she reached her street, the tears were gone, but she was still very fragile. She dried the tears on her cheeks and she was about to take her keys out of her purse when she noticed a car parked in front of her building.

“No way,” she whispered as she recognized the blue truck. She wanted to turn around and go hide somewhere, as she couldn’t go in her apartment anymore. Maybe April would let her sit at the back of her shop? But as she turned around, she heard a door open and close.

“Sam! Sam, wait.”

“Please go away, please go away,” she whispered to herself as she heard Austin’s footsteps getting closer and closer.

She didn’t want him to see her like that, but it was too late already. He’d already grabbed her arm, stopping her.

Sam kept looking at the ground, not wanting to make eye contact with him. She’d been hurt too much already.

“Austin, what are you doing here?”

“You haven’t heard the news?”

“Excuse me if I haven’t been watching much TV lately,” she snapped.

“Sam, it’s done. I sold it. My company, I sold it.”

The words hit Sam like a blow to the face.

“What? Why? Why did you do that?” The words started to sink and she realized he was now a free man.

“I did it for you. You were right all along, and if that’s what it takes for us to be together, then I’m ready to do it.”

“No, but you can’t… I mean, it’s too…” Sam was more confused than ever. Could a person really do that to prove their love? What did it mean, anyway? Austin was miserable at his company. Saying that he’d sold it just for her was a bit of a lie, as he’d done it for himself. But still, it wasn’t something he
had
to do. And when he’d done it, it was to be with her.

Nobody had ever done anything this big for Sam. Nobody had ever taken a leap of faith to be with her. Nobody had ever left their old, boring life to live a new, boring one with her. Who was ready to make that kind of commitment?

Austin put a finger under her chin, lifting her face slowly until she was looking into his eyes.

He was ready to do it.

Austin

“Look at me, Sam.” He knew he didn’t have any right to push her, but he wanted her to understand what he’d done. “I love you. I’ve never loved anyone but you, and I would be the most stupid man in the world to give that up. I’m so sorry I hurt you again.”

“Austin, stop. We’re not from the same world any―”

“Now we are.” He smiled, hoping to cheer Sam up a bit. He could see in her eyes that she’d been crying and it was breaking his heart. “I’m never taking a plane again if you’re not sitting next to me.”

“But you left already.”

“I don’t have any reason to, anymore. I’ll stay for as long as you want me to.”

“I don’t think this is a good idea…”

Austin didn’t expect Sam to fall back into his arms as soon as he showed up. He knew he had to work harder to get her back. After all, why would she trust him now? He’d broken his promise twice. What she probably didn’t realize yet was that he didn’t have a life in New York anymore. He had sold everything he owned there, including his own business, hoping to get a normal life back in Bluebell Valley. And if Sam needed him to prove himself, he could do it.

“Oh, I almost forgot. I have a surprise for you.”

“Austin, I just really want to go home, can we talk―”

“Please, give me a minute. You’re going to love this.” He turned around, hoping Sam wasn’t going to vanish as he had his back to her. He opened the passenger door of his truck and leaned in, grabbing a folder on the floor. When he came back, Sam was still there, her arms crossed over her chest, her eyes gaze on her shoes.

“Here,” Austin said as he handed the folder to her. “This is what I bought after I sold my company. I was hoping you’d go there with me.”

Curiosity took over Sam, and she slowly opened the folder as he waited patiently.

“You… you
bought
this?”

Her eyes were wide open, now fixed on Austin. He couldn’t help smiling. “I only had to use half of the money I got when I sold my apartment in New York to buy it. Do you like it?”

“Do I like it? Are you kidding me? I love it!” Sam’s eyes went back to the papers, mesmerized by what was in front of her. “But wait. Did you buy this villa in Tuscany just to win me back? Because that’s not going to work.”

“I had to do something with my money, and between buying an expensive villa on a vineyard in Tuscany or buying a motorcycle, I thought you’d be more happy about the villa. Italy is such a beautiful country. I want it to be accessible to you, so here.” Austin dug into his jeans back pocket and handed Sam a key. “That’s yours. You can go whenever you want. And if you lose it, you’ll have to wait a whole day for me to come and get the door open for you.”

“Don’t worry, I won’t,” Sam replied as she held the key between her fingers. Austin could feel that she was in a better mood already. She’d even been smiling a bit while looking at the picture and when he’d handed her the key. “Why are you doing all of this?” she asked, looking back at him.

“Because I can’t stop thinking about you. You’re the one for me, and I’m ready to do whatever it takes to be with you.”

“But―”

“Please, let me finish,” Austin insisted as he grabbed her hands. Sam didn’t fight him, and she even dared looking him in the eyes to see how truthful he was.

“You reminded me of how fun and exciting life can be. When I left, I realized you were right—I was simply heading back to my mediocre life. That’s not what I want anymore. I want to wake up next to you every morning. I want to talk for hours, sitting with our feet in the river. I want to laugh with you as we drive to my parents’ orchard―well, I should say
my
orchard now. I just want to be happy with you. I’m here, and I’m not going anywhere. And I’m sorry for everything I said last Friday. I didn’t mean it. I’d just had a lot of awful news and didn’t know how to deal with it. I promise that won’t happen again.”

“I’m sorry for what I said, too,” Sam said. “I don’t know what got into me.”

“But you were right. And I see it now.”

“I wasn’t right. I was just attack―”

“You were right, Sam. It’s okay. I can admit it,” Austin cut her off as a smile appeared at the corner of his mouth. “Can you forgive me?”

He looked into Sam’s eyes, waiting for an answer. She was suddenly silent and it made his heart race.

Sam was studying him. She bit her lower lip before opening her mouth and closing it again. Austin’s heart skipped a beat as he thought she was going to say something. Finally, she sighed and a smile appeared on her face.

“I forgive you… on one condition.”

Austin was so happy he couldn’t stop smiling. “Anything!”

“You have to take me to your villa within the next month.”

“Deal!” Austin replied as he grabbed Sam by the hips, lifting her off the ground. He couldn’t contain his excitement as he felt like all the pieces of the puzzle were finally falling into place. He’d spent so many years following a dream that wasn’t really his own, and now he was going to start living his life the way his heart wanted him to. That started with dating Sam.

She laughed and he decided to finally put her down, all the moments they’d spent together coming back to him. He remembered how good it felt to have her hands on his shoulder, her face so close to his. He could smell her breath, a mix of coffee and mint, her freshly washed hair, and a hint of perfume. All those smells reminded him of how much he loved her and how he couldn’t spend his life without her.

As he stared into her beautiful eyes, he could imagine spending the rest of his life looking into them and not being bored for a single moment.

He had done the right thing.

“I love you so much, Samantha Decker.”

“I love you too, Austin Cole,” she replied, putting her arms around his neck. He would never get tired of that smile.

As their lips touched, Austin knew there was never anything that would take him away from Sam again. He needed her kisses to survive like he needed air to breathe.