Fourth Down (25 page)

I saw them the second I opened the
door. My apartment was so tiny, the huge flower arrangement sitting
on the kitchen counter seemed to overwhelm the space. If I didn’t
know that Brooke had a key and always put any packages delivered to
her house inside my apartment, it might have creeped me out to find
flowers mysteriously appear. They were all different shades of red,
and every single one of them was a poppy.

I dropped my bag on the floor and
walked cautiously toward the flowers, as if they were some strange
exotic animal that had escaped the zoo and found refuge in my
apartment. Who were they from? I was holding my breath as I reached
for the card with a shaky hand. It took me two tries to get the
small envelope open.

Poppy,

Congratulations on the
MCATs. I know you did great.

Ford

How did he know I was taking the MCATs
today? Maybe he heard from Leah? Or did he remember from the one
time I told him…like four months ago? Why flowers? After all this
time with no phone call, not even a text?

The questions could have gone on and
on…and on. But Brooke interrupted my crazy thoughts with a quick
knock, and then of course she walked right in. She glanced at the
flowers and then at me, still holding the note.

“I hope it’s okay that I put them
inside,” Brooke said.

“Of course it’s…okay,” I managed to
get out before I started sobbing. Probably not the reaction Ford
was hoping for when he decided to send me flowers. What kind of
reaction was he hoping for? Doesn’t he know this kind of thing
sends all sorts of mixed messages?

“Oh, Poppy. Don’t cry,” Brooke said as
she pulled me into a hug. “I assume they’re from Ford?”

I nodded my head and sniffled loudly
as I handed the note to her. She read the simple message that gave
absolutely no clue as to his intent and then set it face down on
the counter. Turning me around by the shoulders, she gave me a
little push towards my bathroom.

“Go take a shower. That’s all you have
to do. Then I’m going to do your hair and your makeup, and we’re
going out.”

I opened my mouth to protest out of
habit, but she cut me off.

“And don’t you dare say no. I have
stayed out of your way while you ran yourself ragged studying for
this exam on top of school and work. But tonight you are mine. Leah
and Lindsay will be here in an hour to pick us up, so don’t
dawdle.”

What the hell? It wasn’t like I was
doing a great job of cheering myself up. Having the MCATs behind me
was such a huge weight off my chest that I did want an evening just
to relax and maybe even have some fun. If I could remember how to
do that.

However, as I sat at the bar of a
tavern in my hometown, ten miles away from where I currently lived,
I was having trouble keeping a frown off my face. I knew we had
purposely avoided the pub because it would remind me of Ford. But
being somewhere other than the pub also reminded me of
Ford.

Brooke had dressed me up and curled my
hair, and I suppose I did look good. But who cares? It’s not like I
was out to pick up a guy. The thought of being with anyone else
after Ford was almost nauseating.

Lindsay was driving tonight, on
account of her being eight months pregnant. Although she was
starting to waddle just a little, she still looked gorgeous with
her perfectly styled blonde hair and designer maternity clothes.
Leah was clearly excited to have a night away from her baby, and
had already informed Lindsay she was crashing at her and Grady’s
house tonight.

“I don’t want to risk Maddy crying
while I’m puking up all this alcohol later tonight,” she
said.

I had been twenty one since the end of
December, but this was the first time I had actually been out to
order a drink. The bartender asked me for my ID, and it reminded me
of Halloween night at the pub. At the time, I was horrified and
embarrassed that Ford had reprimanded me for trying to drink
underage, but now it was just another memory I looked back on
fondly. I would even take Ford scowling at me over being
alone.

When my drink arrived I took a big
gulp of the vodka and cranberry juice. I had occasionally drank in
high school and college, although never very much. Never enough to
be drunk. But tonight that was going to change. I was just
desperate enough to try anything to get my mind off Ford, even if
it was only for a few hours.

“Oh, yeah! Poppy’s getting drunk
tonight,” Leah cheered while doing a little dance on her bar
stool.

Brooke clinked her glass against mine
and took a drink of her beer, but Lindsay just gave me a
sympathetic smile. Since we had been studying together all semester
for Anatomy class, I had gotten to know Lindsay pretty well. Of the
three girls, she was the one who could best understand what I was
feeling. One night while we were reviewing for an exam at her
house, she told me how she and Grady had met and then what had
subsequently happened to tear them apart. She had spent five years
missing Grady before they found their way back together. If I have
to wait five years to get over Ford, I think I might just
die.

“You know what you need to do, Poppy?
You need to find the hottest guy in here to dance with. After you
have a couple more drinks, of course. That’s what I do. Find a new
guy to help you get over the old one,” Brooke advised.

I rolled my eyes and grumbled, “Yeah?
How’s that working out for you?”

Brooked looked hurt for a second
before she forced a smile and shrugged.

“Wow, Poppy. Heartbreak sure has
turned you into a bitch,” Leah commented.

Immediately I regretted what I said to
Brooke. She was terribly misguided when it came to men, but she
really was a sweetheart.

“I’m sorry, Brooke. I don’t know
what’s wrong with me. Maybe Ford left some of his assholeness
behind for me.”

Leah threw her arm around my shoulder.
“Don’t worry about it. You get some leeway since Ford is a complete
idiot. Let’s try to forget about him for one night and have some
fun. Besides, it’s fun to not be the only bitch in the
group.”

We all had to laugh at that. Leah
wasn’t a bitch; she was just opinionated and outspoken. She had
more of a crude mouth than Lindsay, who was bubbly and outgoing.
Brooke was a good combination of both of them, with an added touch
of sluttiness. But that was just part of her charm. And me? Well,
if the four of us were on one of those “Which one of these is not
like the others?” puzzles, it would obviously be me.

I wish I had Brooke’s confidence,
Leah’s ability to say what was on her mind, and Lindsay’s happy
ending. Maybe then I would be with Ford right now. Every single day
since he left I wondered if I had done the right thing. Should I
have gone with him? Should I have begged him to stay here with me?
Should I have at the very least told him that I loved him? That was
the one that kept me up at night.

I was fully aware that I could pick up
the phone and call him. To just say hi or to bare my soul. But
something always held me back. It wasn’t a mystery. I wanted Ford
to have the chance to find what he was looking for, and deep down I
knew it wasn’t me. He had come to me in a time of emotional
turmoil. How could I ever be sure he truly loved me, and not just
the solace I represented if I had stayed with him? It was
inevitable that he would leave and I would stay. That’s the way it
was, and I needed to learn to deal with it.

For tonight, dealing with it would
entail a few more vodka and cranberry cocktails and doing anything
except talk about Ford.

“So, how are things going with Chet?”
I asked Brooke. Chet was the latest man that Brooke was in lust
with.

“He’s an asshole,” Brooke bluntly
replied.

“Oh, sorry.”

“It’s okay. I’ve sort of come to
accept the fact that Leah and Lindsay have found the only two
decent guys in this town.”

I tipped my glass to that one, and
then proceeded to chug down the rest of my drink. Setting the empty
glass down hard on the counter, I called to the bartender, “Another
one, please.”

Leah slapped some cash down on the bar
and leaned forward like she was going to tell him all her secrets.
“Listen up, hot stuff. Anytime you see her glass empty? You fill it
back up. Got it?”

He pocketed the cash, winked at me and
immediately replaced my empty glass with a full one. Thank God for
good friends. I really needed this, but my depleted bank account
couldn’t handle more than two drinks tonight.

Talk turned to Lindsay and how she was
feeling. As I listened to her describe how the nursery was
decorated, I felt more than a twinge of jealousy. Not that I wanted
a baby right now or even in the near future. But I did want the
feeling of starting a life with someone. Not just any random
someone in my case.

Lindsay checked her phone when it
beeped with an incoming text message. Smiling sheepishly at us, she
said, “Sorry, ladies. But Grady is coming to crash our girls’
night.”

Leah groaned, “Seriously? Can’t he
find something better to do?”

Grady must have been just outside when
he texted Lindsay, because he walked right up behind her and heard
Leah’s complaint.

“Love you too, Leah. And, no, I don’t
have anything better to do than make sure my pregnant wife isn’t
stuck driving your drunk asses around late at night. Just pretend
I’m one of the girls.”

Leah rolled her eyes and took another
drink of her Lemon Drop martini. “Fine, but the rest of the drinks
are on you.”

Grady smirked as he signaled the
bartender to bring another round for all of us. I was well into my
third drink when Leah made Lindsay, Brook and me pose for a
picture. A short while later her phone rang, and she hopped off her
barstool as she answered the call.

I just sat back and enjoyed the warmth
flowing through my body from the alcohol. A few more, and I would
be able to sleep tonight without dreaming of Ford. At least that
was what I hoped for.

Chapter Eighteen

Ford

Walking into the restaurant, I was
greeted immediately by the hostess, whose eyes travelled from my
head to my feet in an uncomfortably slow manner.

“Just one tonight?” She asked me
hopefully.

“Uh…no. I’m meeting some friends. The
reservation is under Parker,” I replied.

As the hostess led me to a booth at
the back of the restaurant, I already regretted agreeing to this.
Logan Parker was another one of the assistant coaches, and he had
somehow talked me into meeting him, his girlfriend and one of his
girlfriend’s friends for dinner. During the three months I had been
down here, I had gone out with the other coaches a few times for
drinks but hadn’t ventured into dating. I just wasn’t interested -
not in dating anyone, and certainly not in any one night
stands.

The job was everything I hoped it
would be. Any hesitation I had at jumping back into football was
gone. It turns out I had a knack for coaching, for relating to the
players on a level only a former player could. I was part of the
offensive coaching staff, and naturally spent most of my time with
the quarterbacks - the starter as well as the backups. Because it
was spring, we were heavily involved in recruiting visits and
finalizing deals with incoming freshmen as well as working with the
younger players who would be continuing on next fall. This wasn’t a
9-5 job, and for that I was grateful. It meant less time to think
about what wasn’t right in my life.

Given I was currently making great
money doing a job I was born for, the only thing that wasn’t right
was that I was doing it alone. Being alone had never been an issue
for me before. Before…Poppy. She had made it clear she wouldn’t be
coming with me, but she was insistent that I take this job. Somehow
in the few short months we had known each other, she had come to
know me as well if not better than the people I had been friends
with my whole life.

It didn’t stop the fact that I missed
her…all the time. When I was busy working with the team on certain
skills, or travelling with Coach Hawkins to a prospective
quarterback’s hometown, my mind was effectively occupied. But in my
down time, at night when I was back at my apartment, Poppy
dominated my thoughts. When I went to bed, it took me forever to
fall asleep because she wasn’t curled up in my arms with her head
on my chest. When I woke up in the morning, my hand automatically
reached to the empty space next to me. But she was never
there.

I still had all the pictures I had
taken of her on my phone, and I scrolled through a few now as I
followed the hostess to the table. My favorite was one of her when
she had just woken up. It was a close up of her face as she opened
her eyes and propped her chin on my chest. I had taken it the last
morning we spent together in Penn Yan - the morning I left for my
interview down here. If I had known what would happen to us, would
I have boarded that plane?

Realizing we had reached our
destination, I stuck my phone back in my pocket and tried to be
cordial. Logan stood up to shake my hand, and then introduced his
girlfriend, Ally, and her friend, Kayla. Logan was a few years
older than me, but the women looked to be about my age. Both were
blonde and very beautiful. Beautiful in the way that screamed high
maintenance. Kayla was looking at me with the same predatory look
in her eye as the hostess, only amplified because not only did she
clearly find me attractive but she also knew I had a good job - a
really good job.