Everyone looked at Francesca. She looked back at her guests and gave a shaky smile. ‘Entertainment laid on specially for your pleasure. Sorry about that. Anyone like a drink? I know I could do with one.’
People laughed and the tension eased as Aidan and Owen promptly began to refill glasses.
I might as well enjoy myself
, Francesca thought shakily, taking a slug of red wine as her party got into full swing again.
‘WELL, YOU CERTAINLY
know how to throw a party, girl,’ Millie said drily.
‘Oh, don’t remind me,’ groaned Francesca. ‘It was a disaster.’
‘On the contrary, it was highly entertaining,’ Millie said wickedly.
‘Millie!’ Francesca glared at her. It was the following afternoon, her sister had dropped over to have a post-mortem on the party and catch up on developments.
‘Sorry,’ said Millie. ‘But you have to admit, it was far from boring, and once Ken hauled Ralph into a taxi and Mark took Fecund Mother home, things revived and a good night was had by all.’
‘I know. I still have the hangover to prove it,’ Francesca moaned.
‘Have you been talking to Mark this morning?’ Millie asked as she plonked a cup of coffee in front of her sister.
‘Yeah. He’s in bits. Total shock. I can’t believe it myself.’
‘How do you feel about it?’ Millie eyed her sister.
‘As shocked as he is. I can’t imagine Mark into feeding and nappies and all the rest of it. He never wanted any more children with me. I know you’ll think this is horrible of me but I really hope they don’t have a little girl. I could cope with a boy, but a girl would be difficult. I always wanted a daughter.’
Millie reached out and took her hand. ‘It’s not horrible at all. But you’ll cope whatever it is. I’ll tell you one thing, though. That pair aren’t going to last. Child or no child. That relationship is on the ropes.’
‘Don’t say that,’ Francesca said.
‘It’s the truth. You heard her last night.’
‘She was hysterical,’ Francesca murmured.
‘Hysterical or not, she’s had it with him. He’ll be back on your doorstep yet.’
‘No he won’t,’ Francesca said firmly. ‘I’m nobody’s back-up system any more. He can stand on his own two feet just as I had to stand on mine.’
‘That’s ma girl!’ Millie grinned. ‘Did the stain come out of the rug?’
‘Yeah. Bart, bless him, did a great job on it.’ Francesca sighed. ‘That Ralph is something else. Can you believe him coming back here?’
‘I don’t think he’ll venture back after getting his nose bloodied,’ Millie declared. ‘You have to admire Mark defending your honour.’
‘Bloody idiot,’ snapped Francesca. ‘Making a show of me and ruining my party. Men! They’re pathetic.’
‘But where would we be without them?’ giggled the irrepressible Millie. ‘How boring our parties would be otherwise.’
Francesca caught her sister’s eye and started to giggle too. They laughed and laughed until she was gasping.
‘I was so looking forward to my party,’ she confessed. ‘I’ll be the talk of Howth.’
‘Who cares? It was good fun. And isn’t Ken a poppet? He really livened the place up and got us all on track again after the little hiccup.’
‘I know, he’s a dote. Owen and Jonathan got on like a house on fire with him and they all teased me unmercifully. I felt sorry for the boys hearing that they were going to have another sibling the way they did.’
‘Ah, don’t fret about them, they’re fine. And besides, they’ll be across the ocean so it’s not going to impact too much on them. Don’t you take it all on board now,’ Millie warned. ‘It’s not your problem. And don’t let Mark cry on your shoulder every five minutes. He’s dipped his wick, he has to deal with it.’
‘Yes, Millie.’ It was easier to agree.
Millie looked around her. ‘I came to help you tidy up and there isn’t a thing to be done.’
‘The lads were great. They told me to stay in bed and they did it all this morning. They’ve gone to a match this afternoon. Come on in and we’ll sit by the fire,’ Francesca suggested.
‘OK. I’ll have a root in the fridge if you don’t mind, I’m starving,’ Millie announced.
‘Me too,’ Francesca said, feeling suddenly peckish.
‘We’ll have a picnic,’ decided Millie. ‘Grab a plate.’
‘Look, I’m sorry,’ Mark said wretchedly. ‘I
did
go to Rathfarnham with Dad and I
was
going to meet
Jonathan
for a drink but Francesca was having a party and he couldn’t make it so she suggested I call in for an hour or so. She wanted Owen and me to make our peace. She thought it would be a good opportunity. I just didn’t say it to you because I thought you’d be annoyed. You’re always very touchy where Francesca is concerned.’
‘You slept with her last August, didn’t you?’ Nikki accused.
He turned away from her. ‘Don’t be daft,’ he muttered, shocked at her perception.
‘Look me in the eye and say you didn’t,’ Nikki challenged him.
He turned to face her and the contempt he saw in her eyes made him lower his.
‘Bastard!’ she swore. She was lying in bed, as white as a ghost. He’d taken her home last night and she’d closed the bedroom door in his face and refused to talk to him until ten minutes ago. He hadn’t slept a wink all night. He didn’t want another child. He felt totally trapped. ‘How did you get pregnant? I thought you were on the pill,’ he said sullenly.
‘I am. It’s so bizarre. I actually once thought of stopping it to get pregnant in an effort to bind you close to me. I decided against it. Thought it was too drastic a step to take even for love. Mother Nature seemingly had other ideas.’ She gave an unamused laugh. ‘The antibiotics interfered with the pill and I lost protection. I’m about six weeks’ pregnant. The test was well and truly positive, darling.’
‘What do you want to do?’
‘Do you mean do I want to have an abortion?’
‘It’s up to you, Nikki, I wouldn’t presume to interfere in any decision you make,’ Mark said flatly.
‘It’s your baby, Mark.’
‘I know.’
‘Why didn’t you have more children with Francesca?’
He stood up and jammed his hands in his pockets. ‘She had something called endometriosis, she couldn’t have any more. I was glad. I felt two were enough.’
‘You’re a selfish bastard, Mark.’ Nikki sat up in the bed and glared at him.
‘You’re not the first woman to tell me that,’ he growled.
‘So you don’t want it?’
‘No.’
She took a deep breath. ‘I’m keeping the baby. I always shoulder my responsibilities and I won’t shirk this one.’
‘Fine. I’ll support you.’ Mark stared out of the window.
‘You don’t have to support
me
, Mark. You can pay your share towards the baby’s upkeep, of course. But I can support myself, I always have done and I always will,’ she said coldly. She pulled back the sheets and got out of bed. She opened the wardrobe doors and took out an armful of his clothes.
‘What are you doing?’ he asked in surprise.
‘Helping you pack,’ she said calmly. ‘I always said I’d give it until Christmas. Well, Christmas has come and gone and I want to make a fresh start for the new year. And that fresh start doesn’t include you.’
‘Don’t be stupid, Nikki. I can’t leave you like this.’
‘Yes you can. It’s over,’ she said harshly.
‘But where will I go?’ He was horrified.
‘I really don’t care, Mark. Go back to your precious Francesca. You don’t seem to be able to stay away from her. All I know is that you’re not staying here. I’ve had it with you. I want you out, now.’
Francesca’s phone rang. ‘Hello?’
‘Hi, it’s me. Look, I’m in a spot. Nikki and I have broken up and I need a bed for a little while until I get myself sorted. I know it’s short notice and I’ve a cheek to ask but could I bunk on your sofa for a couple of days?’ Mark sounded frantic.
Francesca’s heart lurched. Millie was right. They were
finito
. He and Nikki were over. And he was coming running back to her. She took a deep breath. ‘Sorry, Mark, I don’t think that’s such a good idea, if you don’t mind. I’m sure Gerald will put you up. I’m sorry.’
‘Oh!’ There was stunned silence at the other end. Then, ‘I just took the chance. Sorry for bothering you.’ Mark gave a poor me sigh that came from his toes.
‘I’ll let you go then, Mark, to sort things out. Talk soon,’ Francesca said calmly. ‘Bye.’
‘Bye.’ Mark hung up and Francesca stared into the fire. She didn’t regret her action. She was not Mark’s doormat any longer. Funny though, she’d longed for the day when her husband and that woman would break up. Now it had come and somehow it didn’t feel half as good as she thought it would.
Mark dialled Gerald’s number. The phone rang and rang. Mark began to feel panicky. He was homeless, with all his worldly goods packed into his BMW. What the fuck was he going to do? He’d have to rent a place and then go and buy somewhere, but he couldn’t get anywhere tonight. He could end up stuck in a hotel the way things were going. He couldn’t believe that Francesca had refused him.
He felt enormous relief as he heard his father answer the phone with a hint of breathlessness.
‘Hello, Dad.’
‘I was in the shed, that’s why it took me so long,’ Gerald wheezed.
‘Dad, I’m asking a favour. I need a bed for a couple of nights until I get a place of my own. Can I come home?’
‘Has that other one thrown you out?’ Gerald demanded bluntly.
‘Yes.’
‘I see. Well, you can’t sleep on the side of the road. You’d better come home then, but don’t expect haute cuisine and gold-star hotel treatment,’ Gerald declared and hung up.
Mark smiled in spite of himself. His father was, as ever, true to form. He shook his head and started the engine. He was forty-six years old and going home to live with Daddy, his marriage and relationship in tatters. Was there anything more pathetic?
Nikki watched Mark drive out of the parking bay. She felt very calm. Queasy, but calm, she acknowledged wryly. Now that she’d finally made a decision she knew what she was dealing with. That was a start.
It
was funny but she felt huge relief. No more paranoia, no more fretting about whether Mark loved her or not. No more having to feel jealous of that Francesca cow. A sadness enveloped her. She’d really loved Mark. But it wasn’t enough. It was too one-sided. A totally unequal relationship. She’d never get involved in one like that again, she vowed. It had wrecked her emotionally and physically. Mark had been the worst thing that ever happened to her.
From now on she’d be totally in control of her life again. Her career would flourish. She was going to actively seek a new position. She’d have no problem getting a new job. She looked down at her flat belly and slid her hand along it. There was a baby in there. It was hard to believe.
I won’t think about that right now
, she decided. If she started thinking about this baby and how it was going to affect her future she’d crack up altogether. She had to deal with her heartache first. She caught sight of a picture of herself and Mark. It had been taken early in their relationship. They’d been happy then. Tears welled in her eyes. It had all gone so badly wrong. She loved him but she couldn’t live with him any more. It was affecting her emotional stability too badly. She
had
to get her life sorted and get going again. Nikki lay on the bed and wiped her eyes. No more tears. She’d shed enough to last a lifetime. It was time to move on.
Ralph studied his reflection in the mirror. He had a black eye and a bruised nose and jaw and he couldn’t remember a thing about it. Fear gripped him. It was getting worse and worse. He was losing days at a time
now.
New Year was coming up. He hated New Year.
He had two options, he thought calmly. He could kill himself. Take the tablets here and now and wash them down with a load of booze, or he could take the harder option. It frightened him.
He picked up his car keys, dismayed at how much his hands shook. He drove cautiously until he came to the high-walled iron-gated building. He drove into the tree-lined drive; the branches were bare and stark against the gunmetal sky.
He smiled at the girl in reception. ‘I’d like to sign myself in for treatment but could I do it quickly because I’m afraid I’ll take to my heels and run out of here. And if I do that I’m dead,’ he informed her, handing her his car keys.
‘Hey, Mam, what do you want for the last supper?’ Jonathan called from the kitchen. It was their last night at home.
‘I think I’d like a toasted cheese sandwich,’ Francesca said. She wanted something simple after all the rich food over Christmas. She was ironing Owen’s shirts. She finished the last one and carried the neat pile into her youngest son’s bedroom, slid them into a plastic bag and placed them in the open case on the bed.
‘Are you going to be OK, Mam?’ Owen put his arms around her.
‘I’m going to be fine,’ she assured him and meant it. ‘It’s not like when you were leaving the last time. I didn’t know what I was going to do with myself. I could have ended up the world’s greatest potterer.’
‘I won’t be half as worried about you this time.’
Owen
smiled at her and kissed the top of her head. ‘I’m more worried about Dad. Imagine ending up living with Granddad at this stage of his life.’
‘Your father will be fine, Owen. He just needs to shift his ass and buy a place for himself, but the thing is he doesn’t like hassle. He likes the easy life and life’s not easy. So it will be interesting to see how long he sticks it at Gerald’s.’ She grinned. ‘I think that I can guarantee you your father will have a place of his own in the not-too-distant future.’
‘I love you, Mam.’
‘I love you too.’ She hugged him tightly.
They wouldn’t let her take them to the airport.
‘Two of us going! Could you imagine the bawl factor? No way, Ma. Under no circumstances,’ Jonathan said firmly. ‘We’ll take a taxi.’
‘Definitely,’ agreed his sibling.
‘Well, if that’s what you want.’
‘It is,’ they assured her very emphatically.
To tell the truth she was relieved. It would have been hard to keep her composure at the airport. And she didn’t feel so bad knowing that they were together. Besides, she planned on going out to visit them at Easter so that was something to look forward to.