We sat around a fire, telling stories.
Someone was ribbing Ruby. Her eyes narrowed when she replied to
him, matter-of-factly, “Your mouth is very small… it’s
unattractive.” And her head bobbed side to side as she smiled,
pleased with herself.
And then Anvil laughed and his tongue wagged.
He was holding someone by the arm, preventing them from running
away. Suddenly, my vision changed and I was a hawk, attacking,
tearing a piece from his tongue.
And Chevelle. He was in so
many of my dreams. We were sparring sometimes, clashing swords.
Sometimes he was pummeling me with rocks. Other times, the moments
would have surely made me blush, if I could have felt my cheeks. He
held my face in his hands, declaring his need for me. “I have
wanted you since the moment I first saw you.” But the word
burned.
Wanted
.
He’d used the
wrong
word.
Occasionally, I watched as a third person. My
vision would change and my perspective would be off. Like when I
saw Fannie. She was razing the village, slowly tearing it apart.
Fire and wind and destruction as she cackled and taunted the
villagers. She dropped them as they ran, sometimes snapping their
necks, sometimes breaking a leg so they would have to stay alive to
watch their homes burn, their families die.
There was a large man who forced me to do
magic, testing me until I was on the brink. He was fierce and wore
a long scar across his brow that touched his cheek. He kept his
hair cropped short, not wanting to hide any part of the damage.
And my mother, though my dreams gave her two
names. Dark hair, blowing in the wind, arms outstretched, the
pendant hanging at her neck glowing fiercely. Fire, flames,
burning.
And then water. Drowning. Over and over and
over. It almost made the cliff dreams more bearable, to be away
from the repetitive drowning.
I swam around in these
impressions for what seemed like an eternity. Eventually, they
became so familiar they all started to seem like
my
dreams, not someone
else’s.
Then the dreams stopped. No
images flickered behind my lids, yet my eyes did not open. The
muffle in my ears from the drowning dreams was gone. I could hear
clearly, clearer than I’d ever heard. I hadn’t found my body yet,
but I heard conversations, voices I knew. They were whispers but
they were
clear
. I
listened, hoping to gain clarity… but something was still wrong.
Nothing fit. They discussed Junnie and Anvil and Fannie, but they
were all two people now.
And they were worried, I could hear the
stress in their tones. How long had I been like this? It seemed so
long, trapped here.
I remembered the vines. I
tried to feel my arms, see if they were still there.
Was that why I couldn’t move? Was I still tied to
a wall?
No, no, I wasn’t tied.
Had the thorns been poisoned? Was I dying
now?
I worked to calm myself. No, I was
getting better, not worse.
I felt a light pressure on my forehead and my
eyes flew open instinctively, though I’d had no response from them
all the hours I’d struggled to force them open.
It was Ruby. She sighed with relief. “Oh,
Frey.”
I was suddenly surrounded and the sight made
my head spin. I closed my eyes tight in an attempt to stop it. “Get
her a drink,” I heard someone command. I felt a hand in mine then,
as it was pulled away, replaced with a glass. I grimaced; I doubted
I could hold a glass up, let alone myself.
“
Don’t worry, it's only
water,” someone reassured me.
At the word, I realized I was parched, bone
dry. I forced myself up, keeping my eyes tight as I concentrated on
getting the glass to my lips. They were rough, cracked; I could
feel them against the rim of the glass. I wondered if it was dried
blood or if I had been down so long they’d simply split. I drank
the full glass and felt it exchanged for another.
I finished it as well and
started to lean back. There was a pillow behind me now, keeping me
in a sitting position. It hit me how soft it was below me, beneath
my legs. How warm, how smooth. I opened my eyes gingerly. I was in
a bed. A very
nice
bed.
I looked up to see several people leaving.
Steed? Grey? I fought panic as I wondered if they’d all made it.
The worry throbbed in my head; it felt like my mind could splinter.
I checked the faces close to me for stress but could see none. Ruby
smiled at me softly.
“
How do you feel?” she asked
quietly.
I was having trouble forming a simple answer.
There didn’t seem to be a word for it in the disorder of my brain.
My silence was answer enough.
“
It will pass.”
I hoped she was right.
Chevelle was watching me, anxious now.
“
Is everyone alright?” I
asked. My throat was raw, my voice sounded as if it had been
through a grater.
“
Are you?” he replied in a
low tone.
I couldn’t be sure.
He hesitated, almost not wanting to ask the
question he knew he must. “Can you tell me your name?”
“
Elfreda,” I answered
immediately. He waited for the rest. But I had two answers, didn’t
I? I chose. “… of North Camber.”
He grabbed me, exultant, and kissed me
fervently. Yes, that must have been the right answer.
He finally pulled away. When he saw my face,
the shock there, he knew it was wrong. His expression fell
slightly.
But I wasn’t the other Elfreda, not the long
list of binding words that had been my identity for so long. I
couldn’t seem to reconcile the two.
“
I… I think I’m just
Frey.”
His hands moved to my shoulders, but he kept
them there, tension still in his grip.
“
That’s okay,” Ruby assured
me.
“
We will find the others,”
Chevelle pledged, his jaw tight. I couldn’t tell if the promise was
meant for me or himself.
The
others
. I had forgotten, lost for so long
in my dreams, the bonds I’d hoped would break. I wished I could
think clearly. I tried to remember what had happened but could only
see flames.
A flicker of movement caught my eye and I
turned to find a hawk perched on the ledge of a balcony. Suddenly,
I needed fresh air more than anything.
Chevelle helped me to my
feet and I walked, a little wobbly, to the door. As I stepped out
into the sun, I had to steady myself on the stone ledge. Not
because of the lightheadedness, though I
was
feeling faint, but because below
me, before the steps to what I now realized was a
castle
, was a thousand
elves… watching me. I sucked in a harsh breath, I couldn’t get my
mind to accept what I knew was happening.
I had been so oblivious. But
as I stared down, I understood. This was
my
place.
I heard Ruby behind me now. In a low voice
she assured me, “They have heard of your return, they have come to
see for themselves.”
Chevelle stepped to my right
side, placing something cold and heavy in my hand.
My sword
.
I knew what to do then. I took a deep,
steadying breath as I raised the blade to the air and heard my name
roared in the song of the crowd below.
###
Please look for book two in the Frey Saga:
Pieces of Eight
Special thanks to Annie, who helped bring
Freya to life