Read From Duty to Daddy Online
Authors: Sue MacKay
Marshall’s eyes widened. Struggling to keep up with her? ‘Sure.’ He turned towards the vehicles, turned back. ‘It’s great to see you, Charlie. Really great.’
Take my breath away, why don’t you?
Her eyes feasted on his broad back and narrow hips as he walked away. A shiver of excitement rippled through her. But there was so much she didn’t know about Marshall. Once she’d tipped his world upside down with the news he was a father, would she get the chance to find out anything? Or would he storm off, never to be seen again?
Her gaze drifted to the entangled vehicles. He wouldn’t be storming anywhere in the next few minutes. Her spirits lifted. He had to hang around for a bit. At least until a new car had been arranged, surely?
* * *
Marshall headed for his rental, still trying to collect his scattered brain cells. This tall dude was Charlie’s father. Hell, he’d nearly shouted with laughter when he’d heard that. All the disappointment gripping him since he’d spied the guy under the tree had dissipated in a flash.
You’re not in the clear yet, buddy. That cute little girl has to have a father. Kids don’t just arrive in the letterbox.
His smile slipped. True.
‘Right, let’s get this sorted,’ Brendon muttered, just as a Harley shot around the corner.
‘This your neighbour?’ He tilted his head in the direction of the bike. What a way to introduce himself to Charlie’s father. If the man had any sense he’d make sure he never went near his daughter again.
‘Yes. Come and meet John.’ Brendon seemed preoccupied. ‘Are you staying in town, son?’
Straightening his shoulders, Marshall studied the man before him. There seemed to be a lot more to that question than was apparent. Until he got a grasp on the situation he’d give away little about his intentions. Intentions? Hell, they were as clear as a sandstorm. ‘Yes, sir.’
‘For long?’
So the guy did want him gone. Wasn’t happy about his sudden appearance. Protecting his daughter? ‘Two days. Maybe three, depends on my ride out of the country.’
‘So you’re flexible?’ Was that hope lightening that steady gaze? Nothing made much sense here.
‘Depends on the air force.’ Not to mention Charlie and her situation. ‘I’d like to spend some time catching up with your daughter, if that’s at all possible.’
‘You’d better stay the night with us, then.’
I don’t think so. In the circumstances that’s way too close and personal. ‘Won’t Charlie object?’ What about the kid’s dad?
Brendon gave him a knowing smile. ‘Probably, but then she’ll calm down and see the merit in my idea. You might have to weather her temper first, though.’
‘Seems like I’ve already had a wee dose.’ Marshall shook his head. He’d never once seen her get angry back in Honolulu. ‘Let’s talk to your neighbour about his wrecked SUV first.’ And give me time to decide whether I go for broke or head for a hotel in town.
Stay in the same house as Charlie? And not be able to touch her, or to hold her, kiss her like he ached to do? Because if he did he was sure he’d be history. It would go down a treat with her old man. The guy seemed decent enough but touch his daughter and there’d be hell to pay. Marshall just knew it.
Then he was being introduced to John and they got down to the nitty-gritty of sorting out his bad steering problem.
* * *
Charlie stood at the window, peering through the trees. Spying on the men. Pinching herself. That really was Marshall out there. With Dad. Talking as though they’d always known each other. There didn’t seem to be any animosity from Dad, just his regular caution.
She grinned despite the tension gripping her. Dad must’ve just about wet himself when she’d spoken Marshall’s name. For all his saying to leave it up to the universe to sort her problem, he would never actually have thought anything would come of it. She’d better remember to tell Gemma. She’d enjoy a good laugh.
But Gemma could wait. The man the universe had delivered to her doorstep was about to take all her attention. Strange that now he was here she felt reticent about telling him about Aimee.
Once Marshall knew he was a father Aimee was no longer hers alone. Someone else would have the right to make decisions about her life. Talk about selfish. She definitely wasn’t being fair to Aimee or Marshall. There again, if Marshall wasn’t interested in being a hands-on father, nothing would have changed. Except that if her health turned to custard, Aimee would still have a parent to go to. Marshall would have to take her then.
But it had been one thing wanting to find him with the intention of explaining the whole situation. It was a completely different issue to actually front up to him and turn his day upside down, if not his life.
More than two years ago he’d been adamant he didn’t wanted commitments and she was about to ask him for the biggest one possible. Part of her felt sorry for the guy. If only she’d probed a little to learn what lay behind his statement. But every time she’d started to ask serious questions he’d leaned in and touched her, with the resulting heat turning her brain to molten desire. By the time they’d made love she’d forgotten everything else.
‘Mummy.’ Aimee tugged at the hem of Charlie’s shorts. ‘Want dink.’
‘You want a drink,’ Charlie enunciated clearly for her little miss. Hard to believe how quickly Aimee was learning to talk. Almost overnight she’d gone from saying nothing to these funny little sentences. Aimee was a gift. A joy. She had to get that message across to her daughter’s father so he wouldn’t miss out on anything else as Aimee grew up.
Male laughter filtered through the trees. Seemed everyone was getting on just fine. No surprise there, with John being so easygoing and Dad acting as middle man. Marshall could also charm anyone when he put his mind to it.
Including her. Not that he’d had to try very hard. She’d been his in a blink. Never before had she known such excitement with a man. Marshall had truly shown her past lovers to be beginners. He’d known all the buttons to push or caress or kiss, turning her into a sex addict overnight. A Marshall sex addict. There had not been even a hint of anything sexual since.
Trying to ignore the old but familiar sweet tension in her tummy, she turned away and headed for the kitchen and the juice, tidying away toys as she went. Aimee tended to spread everything far and wide when she was playing, making it a constant job to keep the floor clear enough to get from one room to another. Normally just thinking about it made Charlie feel tired but not today. Right now she felt more invigorated than she’d felt since she’d first become ill.
Must be something in the air, she hummed to herself. Or a certain American on her doorstep. Her lips twitched. Marshall Hunter was here. In Taupo. Outside her home. Unbelievable. And then the tears really started, pouring down her cheeks, dripping off her chin.
* * *
Brendon told Marshall to go on inside the house, and that he’d be along shortly. Marshall could feel his antennae twitching. It was as though Brendon was pushing him and Charlie together—for a catch-up chat? Or was there more to it? But no one had known he’d turn up this afternoon so that couldn’t be right.
Did Charlie mind him being here? Or was she about to kick him to the moon? He couldn’t decide if she’d truly been happy to see him or not. Initially she’d all but thrown herself at him, but only moments later she’d pulled back, hard.
He stepped into the warm interior and paused to suck in a breath. It had been a long haul to get here, no point in retreating now. Until today he’d never retreated—unless his life had been in danger. Or his buddy’s.
His mouth soured. Now was not the time to be recalling that bleak day in hell. Fronting up to Charlie could never be as painful as dealing with what had happened to Rod. The man after whom he’d promised to name his first son, if and when he ever got around to settling down and raising kids. Some time around when he reached fifty.
Stepping along the wide hallway, he glanced at the framed black-and-white photos on the walls. Most of them featured Lake Taupo with the mountains in the background. They were very good. ‘C Lang’ was signed across the bottom-right corner. Charlie did photography? Darn, he knew so little about her.
He found her in the kitchen with the child. Definitely thinner than he remembered. Had pregnancy done that to her? Most women put on weight, didn’t lose it. Could she have taken getting back into shape too seriously? An image of running along the beach in Honolulu with Charlie at his side sprang up and he smiled. Yes, Charlie had been a fitness fanatic. Had loved her sports almost more than anything else. Almost. Sex had been top of the pops. But that was a kind of sport too, she’d told him one day, a cheeky grin lighting up her face.
‘What did John have to say?’ the woman in question asked in a strained voice as she kept her back to him and supervised the little girl drinking juice. Most of the liquid made it into the child’s mouth but the pink tee shirt had a yellow streak down the front.
The pranged cars. Of course. Focus, man. ‘He seemed okay with it all.’ Marshall tried for a nonchalant shrug to hide these oddball emotions charging around his head. He needn’t have worried because Charlie continued focusing her attention elsewhere. He told her, ‘I’ve phoned the rental company and they’ll sort it out, including supplying me with another car.’ His eyes were stuck on the child. She was so cute. Except for the eyes, she had her mother’s colouring right down to the freckles on her button nose.
‘Bet they loved that,’ Charlie sniffed, and he knew she was crying.
Three long strides and he stood in front of her, reaching his fingers to trace the wet lines on her face. ‘Hey, babe, don’t cry. Sorry if I’ve upset you by turning up out of the blue. If you want me to disappear, I’ll go. Pronto.’
Panic flared, widened those damp eyes that flicked from him to the child and back again. ‘You can’t go. Not yet.’ She hiccupped through her tears and swiped at her face again.
Why the panic? Then he was holding her, wrapping his arms around those thin shoulders and tucking her up close to his big, warm body. Protecting her. From what? Himself? Hell, he hadn’t even thought about taking her in his arms. It had just happened. And Charlie hadn’t slapped him across the face and pulled away. He liked holding her. Liked feeling her small frame against his larger one, even if there was a frailty to her that hadn’t been there before.
‘Charlie?’
‘Yes?’ came the muffled reply against his chest.
‘Why are you shaking?’ Tremors had begun rocking through her. ‘Why the tears?’
She said nothing.
Placing his hands on her waist, he tipped back a little to put some space between them. Hell, she was thin, bony even. Was she all right? ‘Talk to me. Please. Tell me about you. About your daughter.’
Charlie’s face whitened, and again panic flared in those haunting eyes. She nodded. ‘Yes. Of course.’
What was going on here? Didn’t she want him asking about her family? That seemed odd. What about her partner? Only one way to find out. ‘You married now?’
Her head swung from side to side, that distinct unease still all over her demeanour. ‘No. What about you?’
She wasn’t going to change the subject that easily. ‘Is this your house?’
‘We share it with Dad. I grew up here. I do have a house in town, which I bought a couple of years ago, but it’s rented out at the moment. Dad helps with looking after Aimee.’ She drew a long breath and opened her mouth, and another torrent of words spilled out. ‘We both work at a medical centre—’
Marshall placed a finger on her lips, felt an electric sizzle up his arm. ‘Slow down, Charlie.’ Under his hands the trembling continued. Because of him? Did his touch disturb her? Or was she afraid of something? He dropped his arms to his sides and stepped back, putting space between them. ‘Are you all right?’ he asked again. She’d better be. He couldn’t bear it if something bad had happened to her.
Her chin ducked abruptly. ‘I’m fine.’ Then, ‘I’m still getting over the shock of seeing you outside our house. Why were you driving away?’
Because I’m a prize idiot. ‘Don’t get the wrong idea here.’ I’m not a stalker. ‘I’d been parked outside for a few minutes, watching you and wondering if you’d welcome me or not. Then I saw your father walking around to the back of the house and got the wrong idea.’
‘So you drove away.’
‘I didn’t want to give you any problems. We had an agreement back in Honolulu and obviously I’ve broken that.’ Had to. Had needed to get over her by seeing her again. But already doubts were creeping in under his skin. Would he ever be able to get over Charlie?
‘So if you hadn’t gone all American and driven on the wrong side of the road, I’d never have known you were here?’ Anger laced her tone and those eyes fired up. ‘You’d have gone away without a word?’ she hissed, leaning closer.
‘I thought I was doing the right thing by you.’ Now
he
was on the back foot. What had just happened?
Her forefinger jabbed his chest. ‘Do you have any idea how hard I’ve tried to find you?’ Jab. ‘Agreement or not?’ Jab. ‘I have spent...’ jab ‘...untold hours on the computer, searching for you.’ Jab. ‘And you were driving away.’ Then her anger disappeared as quickly as it had risen. Her chest rose and fell fast. ‘Sorry. It’s just that I wanted to find you and now you’re here and I don’t know how to tell you something important.’
Warning bells started blaring in his skull. Nothing Charlie said made any sense and yet he was on high alert. Incoming attack. Stepping back further, he leaned one shoulder against the wall and crossed his ankles, to all appearances totally at ease. But inside his head he was pulling up every scenario imaginable. Because something big was about to go down. Something very big.
Then Charlie glanced from him to the little girl. A sob broke across her lips.
And shocked realisation slammed into him. The green eyes should’ve warned him.
‘Aimee’s mine.’
CHAPTER FOUR
A
LL
THE
AIR
in Charlie’s lungs whooshed out. Her arms instantly wrapped around her waist. And she stared, like her eyes were glued to Marshall’s stunned face, watching and searching.
His
gaze, firmly fixed on Aimee, showed nothing of his thoughts. Not a hint.
Her heart crashed repeatedly against her ribs as fear and hope warred in her brain. Would he walk? Would he stay? At least stop long enough to hear the rest? Would he shout at her? Call her all sorts of names for not telling him, even when she’d tried so hard to get in touch? Or blame her for getting pregnant in the first place? The skin on her arms lifted in chilly bumps. Why had she not prepared for this moment? Yeah, right. Like how?
‘Mum, mum.’
Charlie reluctantly dragged her eyes from Marshall and checked out her daughter. Their daughter. Oh, hell. Her stomach clenched. She clamped her hand over her mouth as nausea rose. This was so—so big. So difficult. Swallow. Swallow.
‘Charlie? It’s true, isn’t it? I’m a father.’ Those beautiful green eyes shifted their focus to her. Questions fired out at her.
Another swallow and she answered his first one. ‘Yes.’ The word whispered across her bottom lip. She swallowed, tried again. ‘Yes, Aimee is your daughter. She...’ Then the words locked into a lump at the back of her throat, refusing to budge.
‘Holy Toledo.’
That was a good response. Wasn’t it? It didn’t sound bad. At least he was acting calm. So far. She managed, ‘She was born a little over eight months after I got back from Honolulu.’
‘You didn’t have any way of contacting me.’ A ton of regret darkened those words but no blame. Then, ‘So this is why you’ve been trying to find me.’
‘Yes.’ He didn’t need to know the rest yet. ‘It’s a lot to take in.’
‘Where do I start?’ He sounded completely bewildered. His bemused gaze flicked back and forth between Aimee and her.
At least he wanted to start. But wait until the shock completely wore off. It might be a different story then. Charlie turned to Aimee, who had her cup upside down, pointing in the general direction of her open mouth. Aimee. The love of her life. The reason she was in this situation. Warmth sneaked into Charlie. She never got tired of watching her daughter.
‘Up, up.’ Aimee’s face began screwing up for an outburst.
Moving quickly, Charlie reached for a damp cloth to wipe some of the mess off Aimee’s face before lifting her to hold her tightly. She wanted to hand Aimee to Marshall but for the life of her she couldn’t. She froze, unable to make the move. Unable to share her daughter with this man. Their daughter, remember? Looking over the top of Aimee’s head, her gaze clashed with Marshall’s intent one. Was this when he ran screaming from the house, never to be seen again? Admittedly he’d handled himself well so far but it had only been a few minutes since the truth had dawned on him.
His face softened from shock to awe. ‘Charlie Lang, a mother. It suits you.’ Then his gaze shifted infinitesimally, slowly cruised over Aimee. Looking for?
She said, ‘She’s got your eyes.’
‘Yeah.’
‘You want to hold her?’
His hands jammed into his pockets as he took a backward step.
Okay. Too soon. Shuffling sideways with her heavy bundle, she flicked the kettle on. ‘I’ll make that coffee I promised. How do you take it?’ Her stomach would probably heave if she drank any but she had to do something other than hold Aimee, who’d gone very quiet and still. Twisting her neck, she saw Aimee studying the man in their kitchen.
‘Black and strong.’ Marshall was suddenly avoiding looking at either of them, apparently finding the view out the window far more interesting.
Aimee wriggled to be put down. Placing her carefully on her feet, Charlie watched as she tottered over to Marshall and stood staring up at this stranger. An important stranger, if all went well. Rubbing her hands up and down her arms, she wondered what to do if Marshall decided he didn’t want anything to do with Aimee. Even if her health didn’t let her down, every child was entitled to two parents.
The need to explain things gripped Charlie and she began talking fast. ‘From the moment I found out I was pregnant I wanted you to have the opportunity to decide what role you’d have in your child’s life.’
He turned back to face her, saying absolutely nothing. Thankfully his steady gaze didn’t condemn her.
So she continued. ‘I’ve spent a lot of time looking for you in between having Aimee and learning to be a good mum. I checked every known social network on the net. Then I started phoning M Hunters in various states.’
His eyes widened as he gave a grim smile. ‘Truly?’
‘You wouldn’t believe how many there are in the US.’ Too many. Her phone bills were horrendous some months. ‘Marshall, I don’t want anything from you. Not for me. Certainly nothing like money or other handouts. Because of an inheritance from my mother I’m comfortably off and can easily provide whatever my child needs as she grows up. But I do want you to know her. Aimee needs her father to be in her life in some capacity.’ Her mouth was getting drier by the word, her tongue beginning to stick to the roof of her mouth.
Marshall’s steady gaze unsettled her. What was going on in that head of his? If only he’d say something. Like what?
I’m thrilled to learn I’ve got a child. Let’s play happy families and see how that goes. We know nothing about each other but our child will solve all the differences.
Sounding good so far? Absolutely wonderful. If it wasn’t completely fictitious.
* * *
Marshall watched the emotions scudding across Charlie’s fragile-looking face as she babbled at him. He could read her like a neon sign. She was filled with the need to explain, to be fair and honest, and yet she was afraid he was going to skew everything for her and her little girl. That really stung despite knowing she was right on that score. But not in the way she imagined. She knew nothing about him. Had no idea he would make the worst father imaginable because of the upbringing he’d had. His fingers zipped across his head. What if he’d inherited his father’s genes? No way was he going to find out. The stakes were too high for all of them.
Clearing his throat, he hurried to put her at ease. ‘Charlie, whatever happens, however I decide to play this...’ Play was the wrong word. He shrugged, temporarily out of the right words, then carried on. ‘I will never try to take Aimee away from you. By that I mean I won’t demand she lives with me six months of the year or anything equally hideous.’
She didn’t relax. ‘You would have a fight on your hands if you did.’
‘I figured.’ He tried for a smile, managed to paste something resembling one on his face. ‘You could’ve picked a far better guy to be Aimee’s dad.’ If only he was more like his grandfather than his own father. A caring, tentative farmer, not a hard-nosed soldier and disciplinarian.
Her beautiful eyes widened. ‘Come on. If I believed that I wouldn’t have bothered looking for you.’ Then she added with a hint of the fun-loving Charlie he’d once known, ‘You’re a wonderful man. Any girl would be proud to show you off on school sports day.’
‘Sports day?’ Gulp. ‘You’re years ahead of me, Charlie.’ He was still trying to grapple with the fact he’d spawned this little kid currently shoving building blocks through juice in the middle of the floor. Kind of messy. Kind of cute. Slam. His heart squeezed. Hard.
She’s mine? I did that? Helped make Aimee?
He dragged his knuckles down his cheeks, digging in deep, checking he was awake, if he was feeling something or this was a dream. Everything was real. All too damned real. Spinning around, he charged for the door. He needed air, needed to get out of Charlie’s space. Needed to think without seeing Charlie’s concerns glittering out from those tragic eyes.
Why did she look like that? He didn’t remember seeing anything but laughter in her eyes and face before. Guess last time had been all about fun. Today was about consequences and reality.
Stumbling down the front steps, he charged down the path, reining in the urge to run faster than he’d ever run before. This situation was not going to go away. Looking along the road, he saw the crunched-up vehicle he’d driven down from Auckland. What a mess. Right now New Zealand didn’t seem to be agreeing with him.
Spinning around, he strode away in the opposite direction, trying to outwalk what he’d left at Charlie’s house. But she followed, in his head, as did that little cutie named Aimee. They were probably never going to leave him again. Even when he was on the other side of the world, fighting battles, looking out for his comrades, those two females would be lurking in some corner of his mind. Gulp.
Since when did he let situations get the better of him? He was trained to face adversity and deal with it. Despite the sense of freefalling from a plane without a parachute, he grinned. Or was it a grimace? In the army they didn’t teach you to deal with being told about eighteen-month-old daughters.
But you’re more than a soldier. You’re a doctor. Doctors nurtured, cared, mended, saved.
Hadn’t saved Rod.
He swore. Loud and badly. Stared up at the sky. ‘What do you think about this, then,
buddy
? Huh? What the hell am I supposed to do now? Quit soldiering? Move down under to a tourist town with a big lake and a small population? Be a father?’
‘Hey, watch out, mister,’ a young voice yelled.
Marshall dropped his head, glared around. Hell, that had been close. ‘Sorry, kid, didn’t mean to do that,’ he called after the boy on a bike. A horn tooted from behind him and he nearly leapt out of his skin. He had to get a grip. Standing in the middle of the road, shouting up at the heavens, was going to get him killed. Or locked up.
Waving an apology at the car’s irate driver, he stepped off the road onto the grass verge that led down to the lake edge. Sinking down on his haunches, he studied the terrain. The choppy water didn’t stop kids leaping and diving into the chilly depths. Beyond them sailboats and motorboats sped back and forth. On the shoreline scantily clad people laughed and chattered under sun umbrellas as they tried to cool off. All very innocuous. Summer fun, family time.
Two things he’d had next to none of, and then only with his grandparents. A rare wave of anger swept over him. He had missed out on things other kids took for granted. His parents had never taken him out for the day just to have fun. He sucked up the anger, swallowed it. Thought about Grampy and Granny. They’d had more than enough love to spare for the skinny kid who’d arrived on their doorstep every school break.
They’d been his mentors, and yet he lived by his father’s role model. Always on the move, never stopping one place long enough to make friends or have a relationship that lasted longer than a couple of weeks. He’d met his only close friend in officer training camp and they’d been in the same unit ever since. Yeah, and look where that had gotten the guy. In a wooden box far too soon.
The same thing could happen to him any time. Active duty meant danger and the very real danger didn’t take note of who was in the firing line. Rod had been one of the best and he’d still bought the big one.
Shuddering, Marshall asked himself how he could be a good father for Aimee. He’d be in and out of her life, never stopping long enough to go to that sports day Charlie had mentioned. It would be better if he told Charlie right from the get-go that she should find a decent man and settle down to raise Aimee properly, lovingly, knowing from day to day, week to week, that he’d always be coming home. Because she sure wasn’t going to get that from him.
* * *
In the laundry directly off the kitchen Charlie mechanically folded clean washing and sorted it into piles. Where had Marshall charged off to? More importantly, was he coming back? Her heart slowed. That might’ve been the last time she’d ever see him. The only time Aimee saw her father, and unfortunately her wee girl had no idea who Marshall was to her.
But Marshall took responsibility very seriously. She’d seen that first hand while working with him in Honolulu. It wasn’t something he switched on and off in different situations. It was as intrinsic to him as breathing. The only time she’d met his friend, Rod, in Honolulu he’d told her Marshall put looking out for his men before everything else, including his own safety.
Marshall hadn’t said Aimee had nothing to do with him. When he’d declared, ‘Aimee’s mine,’ without a doubt in his voice, the world had stopped moving. Round one to Marshall. Except there were plenty more hurdles to come. None of them would be easy. They had a long way to go towards making this shared parenthood work. If he came back.
He would. Her fingers reached for the tabletop, brushed the wooden surface lightly. Please.
Dad walked into the kitchen. ‘Think it’s probably about time for a cold beer. Wouldn’t you agree, Marshall?’
‘Can’t say no to that,’ came the deep rumble of the voice she’d been straining to hear for the last hour.
She sighed and dredged up a smile. This putting it out there seemed to work. Marshall had returned. Now the fireworks could start. Or maybe they wouldn’t. She’d try to give him the time and space to absorb the startling news he’d never expected to hear.
‘Hey.’ A shadow fell across her.
Her tummy squeezed with longing when she looked up into the eyes that had been a part of her dreams for so long. Hunger flared for that fun they’d shared, for the uncomplicated nights when they’d explored each other’s bodies, the simple pleasure of walking hand in hand along the beach to watch the sunset. Even a need tugged at her for that professional camaraderie when Marshall had mentored the intern fresh from medical school. But none of that had a place in this situation. ‘Hey to you, too.’
‘Sorry I charged off. I went down to the lake while everything sank in.’ He looked genuinely contrite. ‘I hope you didn’t think I was running away.’
She winced, went for the truth. ‘I hoped you hadn’t, but I did wonder if you’d disappeared from my life again.’ Even she heard the sadness in her voice. ‘It must’ve been a huge shock.’
His forefinger traced her bottom lip. ‘One I hadn’t prepared for, that’s for sure. But I’m back and you have my undivided attention for the next day or two.’