Galaxy's Edge Magazine: Issue 7: March 2014 (32 page)

Padway fumbled for his date-book and pencil. He wrote his request on a page of the date-book, and held the thing up.

The man peered at it, moving his lips. His face cleared. “Oh, you want to know the
date?
” said he.

“
Sic
, the date.”

The man rattled a long sentence at him. It might as well have been in Trabresh. Padway waved his hands despairingly, crying, “
Lento!
”

The man backed up and started over. “I said I understood you, and I thought it was October 9th, but I wasn’t sure because I couldn’t remember whether my mother’s wedding anniversary came three days ago or four.”

“What year?”

“What
year?
”

“
Sic
, what year?”

“Twelve eighty-eight
Anno Urbis Conditae
.”

It was Padway’s turn to be puzzled. “Please, what is that in the Christian era?”

“You mean, how many years since the birth of Christ?”

“
Hoc ille
—that’s right.”

“Well, now—I don’t know; five hundred and something. Better ask a priest, stranger.”

“I will,” said Padway. “Thank you.”

“It’s nothing,” said the man, and went about his business. Padway’s knees were weak, though the man hadn’t bitten him, and had answered his question in a civil enough manner. But it sounded as though Padway, who was a peaceable man, had not picked a very peaceable period.

What was he to do? Well, what would any sensible man do under the circumstances? He’d have to find a place to sleep and a method of making a living. He was a little startled when he realized how quickly he had accepted the Tancredi theory as a working hypothesis.

He strolled up an alley to be out of sight and began going through his pockets. The roll of Italian bank
notes would be about as useful as a broken five-cent mousetrap. No, even less; you might be able to fix a mousetrap. A book of American Express traveler’s checks, a Roman street-car transfer, an Illinois driver’s license, a leather case full of keys—all ditto. His pen, pencil, and lighter would be useful as long as ink, leads, and lighter fuel held out. His pocketknife and his watch would undoubtedly fetch good prices, but he wanted to hang onto them as long as he could.

He counted the fistful of small change. There were just twenty coins, beginning with four ten-lire silver cartwheels. They added up to forty-nine lire, eight centesimi, or about five dollars. The silver and bronze should be exchangeable. As for the nickel fifty-centesimo and twenty-centesimo pieces, he’d have to see. He started walking again.

He stopped before an establishment that advertised itself as that of S. Dentatus, goldsmith and money changer. He took a deep breath and went in.

S. Dentatus had a face rather like that of a frog. Padway laid out his change and said: “I…I should like to change this into local money, please.” As usual he had to repeat the sentence to make
himself
understood.

S. Dentatus blinked at the coins. He picked them up, one by one, and scratched at them a little with a pointed instrument. “Where do these—you—come from?” he finally croaked.

“America.”

“Never heard of it.”

“It is a long way off.”

“Hm-m-m.
What are these made of? Tin?” The money changer indicated the four nickel coins.

“Nickel.”

“What’s that? Some funny metal they have in your country?”

“
Hoc ille
.”

“What’s it worth?”

Padway thought for a second of trying to put a fantastically high value on the coins. While he was working up his courage, S. Dentatus interrupted his thoughts:

“It doesn’t matter, because I wouldn’t touch the stuff. There wouldn’t be any market for it. But these other pieces—let’s see—” He got out a balance and weighed the bronze coins, and then the silver coins. He pushed counters up and down the grooves of a little bronze abacus, and said: “They’re worth just under one solidus. Give you a solidus even for them.”

Padway didn’t answer immediately. Eventually he’d have to take what was offered, as he hated the idea of bargaining and didn’t know the values of the current money. But to save his face he had to appear to consider the offer carefully.

A man stepped up to the counter beside him. He was a heavy, ruddy man with a flaring brown mustache and his hair in a long or Ginger Rogers bob. He wore a linen blouse and long leather pants. He grinned at Padway, and reeled off: “
Ho, frijond, habais faurthei!
Alai skalljans sind waidedjans
.”

Oh, Lord, another language! Padway answered: “I…I am sorry, but I do not understand.”

The man’s face fell a little; he dropped into Latin: “
Sorry,
thought you were from the Chersonese, from your clothes. I couldn’t stand around and watch a fellow Goth swindled without saying anything, ha, ha!”

The Goth’s loud, explosive laugh made Padway jump a little; he hoped nobody noticed. “I appreciate that. What is this stuff worth?”

“What has he offered you?” Padway told him. “Well,” said the man, “even I can see that you’re being
hornswoggled. You give him a fair rate, Sextus, or I’ll make you eat your own stock. That would be funny, ha, ha!”

S. Dentatus sighed resignedly. “Oh, very well, a solidus and a half. How am I to live, with you fellows interfering with legitimate business all the time? That would be, at the current rate of exchange, one solidus thirty-one sesterces.”

“What is this about a rate of exchange?” asked Padway.

The Goth answered: “The gold-silver rate. Gold has been going down the last few months.”

Padway said: “I think I will take it all in silver.”

While Dentatus sourly counted out ninety-three sesterces, the Goth asked: “Where do you come from? Somewhere up in the Hunnish country?”

“No,” said Padway, “a place farther than that, called America. You have never heard of it, have you?”

“No. Well now, that’s interesting. I’m glad I met you, young fellow. It’ll give me something to tell the wife about. She thinks I head for the nearest brothel every time I come to town, ha, ha!” He fumbled in his handbag and brought out a large gold ring and an unfaceted gem. “Sextus, this thing came out of its setting again. Fix it up, will you? And no substitutions, mind.”

As they went out the Goth spoke to Padway in a lowered voice. “The real reason I’m glad to come to town is that somebody put a curse on my house.”

“A curse?
What kind of a curse?”

The Goth nodded solemnly.
“A shortness-of-breath curse.
When I’m home I can’t breathe. I go around like this—” He gasped asthmatically. “But as soon as I get away from home I’m all right. And I think I know who did it.”

“Who?”

“I foreclosed a couple of mortgages last year. I can’t prove anything against the former owners,
but—
” He winked ponderously at Padway.

“Tell me,” said Padway, “do you keep animals in your house?”

“Couple of dogs.
There’s the stock, of course, but we don’t let them in the house. Though a shoat got in yesterday and ran away with one of my shoes.
Had to chase it all over the damned farm.
I must have been a sight, ha, ha!”

“Well,” said Padway, “try keeping the dogs outside all the time and having your place well swept every day. That might stop your—uh—wheezing.”

“Now, that’s interesting. You really think it would?”

“I do not know. Some people get the shortness of breath from dog hairs. Try it for a couple of months and see.”

“I still think it’s a curse, young fellow, but I’ll try your scheme. I’ve tried everything from a couple of Greek physicians to one of St. Ignatius’ teeth, and none of them works.” He hesitated. “If you don’t mind, what were you in your own country?”

Padway thought quickly,
then
remembered the few acres he owned in down-state Illinois. “I had a farm,” he said.

“That’s fine,” roared the Goth, clapping Padway on the back with staggering force. I’m a friendly soul but I don’t want to get mixed up with people too far above or below my own class, ha, ha! My name is Nevitta; Nevitta Gummund’s son. If you’re passing up the Flaminian Way sometime, drop in. My place is
about eight miles north of here.”

“Thanks. My name is Martin Padway. Where would be a good place to rent a room?”

“That depends. If I didn’t want to spend too much money I’d pick a place farther down the river.
Plenty of boarding houses over toward the Viminal Hill.
Say, I’m in no hurry; I’ll help you look.” He whistled sharply and called: “
Hermann, hiri her!
”

Hermann, who was dressed much like his master, got up off the curb and trotted down the street leading two horses, his leather pants making a distinctive
flop-flop
as he ran.

Nevitta set out a brisk walk, Hermann leading the horses behind. Nevitta said: “What did you say your name was?”

“Martin Padway—Martinus is good enough.” (Padway properly pronounced it Mart
ee
no.)

Padway did not want to impose on Nevitta’s good nature, but he wanted the most useful information he could get. He thought a minute,
then
asked: “Could you give me the names of a few people in Rome, lawyers and physicians and such, to go to when I need them?”

“Sure. If you want a lawyer specializing in cases involving foreigners, Valerius Mummius is your man. His office is alongside of the Aemilian Basilica. For a physician try my friend Leo Vekkos. He’s a good fellow as Greeks go. But personally I think the relic of a good Arian saint like Asterius is as effective as all their herbs and potations.”

“It probably is at that,” said Padway. He wrote the names and addresses in his date-book.
“How about a banker?”

“I don’t have much truck with them; hate the idea of getting in debt. But if you want the name of one, there’s Thomasus the Syrian, near the Aemilian Bridge. Keep your eyes open if you deal with him.”

“Why, isn’t he honest?”

“Thomasus?
Sure he’s honest. You just have to watch him, that’s all. Here, this looks like a place you could stay.” Nevitta pounded on the door, which was opened by a frowsy superintendent.

This man had a room, yes. It was small and ill-lighted. It smelled. But then so did all of Rome. The s
u
perintendent wanted seven sesterces a day.

“Offer him half,” said Nevitta to Padway in a stage whisper.

Padway did. The superintendent acted as bored by the ensuing haggling as Padway was. Padway got the room for five sesterces.

Nevitta squeezed Padway’s hand in his large red paw. “Don’t forget, Martinus, come see me some time. I always like to hear a man who speaks Latin with a worse accent than mine, ha, ha!” He and Hermann mounted and trotted off.

Padway hated to see them go. But Nevitta had his own business to tend to. Padway watched the stocky figure round a corner,
then
entered the gloomy, creaking boarding house.

CHAPTER II

Padway awoke early with a bad taste in his mouth, and a stomach that seemed to have some grasshopper in its ancestry. Perhaps that was the dinner he’d eaten—not bad, but unfamiliar—consisting mainly of stew smothered in leeks. The restaurateur must have wondered when Padway made plucking motions at the table
top; he was unthinkingly trying to pick up a knife and fork that weren’t there.

One might very well sleep badly the first night on a bed consisting merely of a straw-stuffed mattress. And it had cost him an extra sesterce a day, too. An itch made him pull up his undershirt. Sure enough, a row of red spots on his midriff showed that he had not, after all, slept alone.

He got up and washed with the soap he had bought the previous evening. He had been pleasantly su
r
prised to find that soap had already been invented. But when he broke a piece off the cake, which resembled a slightly decayed pumpkin pie, he found that the inside was soft and gooey because of incomplete po
t
ash-soda metathesis. Moreover, the soap was so alkaline that the thought he might as well have cleaned his hands and face by sandpapering.

Then he made a determined effort to shave with olive oil and a sixth-century razor. The process was so painful that he wondered if it mightn’t be better to let nature take its course.

He was in a tight fix, he knew. His money would last about a week—with care, perhaps a little longer.

If a man knew he was going to be whisked back into the past, he would load himself down with all sorts of useful junk in preparation, an encyclopedia, texts on metallurgy, mathematics, and medicine, a slide rule, and so forth.
And a gun, with plenty of ammunition.

But Padway had no gun, no encyclopedia, nothing but what an ordinary twentieth-century man carries in his pockets. Oh, a little more, because he’d been traveling at the time: such useful things as the traveler’s checks, a hopelessly anachronistic street map, and his passport.