I cleared my throat. “So, about magic…” Not very subtle, but I wasn’t sure subtlety would work.
Kimber stared at me long and hard before she finally allowed our previous subject to drop. She shook her head at me in a last sign of disapproval, then asked, “What would you like to know about it?”
I took another sip of my posset as I tried to figure out what to ask first. “What can it do?” I asked, then decided that was probably the stupidest, vaguest question ever. But Kimber didn’t find it as stupid as I did.
“In theory, magic can do just about anything, if the caster is skilled enough.” Her eyes glazed over as she searched for what she wanted to say. “Magic is an elemental force, native to Faerie. It’s not quite sentient, but it’s close.”
I shivered, because the idea of sentient magic was just, well, creepy.
“When you cast a spell, you draw the magic into your body—kind of like when you draw a deep breath before you dive into a pool. Then you release the magic you’ve drawn in, and—if you’re any good at it—it does what you want it to do.
“We vary in how much magic we can draw to ourselves—the more magic we can draw, the more dramatic a spell we can cast. At least in theory. In reality, drawing the magic is the easy part. Getting it to do what you want…” She shrugged. “That’s a lot harder.”
“So what is it that makes Ethan a magical prodigy?” I asked. I knew I was combining two of Kimber’s least favorite subjects—Ethan, and his superior magical abilities—but I wanted to understand about magic, and this seemed like a necessary step.
On cue, the corners of Kimber’s mouth tugged downward. “First, he can draw a lot of magic. Second, he has incredible endurance. Drawing and directing the magic is exhausting. And third, he’s scary-good at getting the magic to do what he wants.
“There are some spells that almost all of us can do. Things like locking doors, or lighting candles. They’re so common, they’re easy. It’s like teaching your dog to sit—just about anyone can manage that, but it would take someone with more skill to teach the dog a trick. If you have more skill with the magic, you can make it do things ordinary people can’t.”
“Like make me lose my voice?” I asked.
Kimber grinned. “Actually, that’s a very common spell, usually used against unruly children. No, something harder would be major healing spells, or illusions. Many of us could manage to do them with a lot of work and practice. Just like many humans could theoretically do brain surgery, but few are willing to put in the massive effort required to learn how to do it.
“What makes Ethan scary-good is that he can make the magic do lots of different, unrelated things. Most people have to really specialize. Sorry to use yet another analogy, but this is really hard to explain to a human. Let’s say a certain kind of magic—like healing magic—understands a specific language, like French. If you learn to speak French, then you can get the magic to do what you want. But the more complicated the spell, the more French you have to know to be able to do it. And maybe illusion magic speaks Mandarin, and attack magic speaks Swahili. You’d have to know three completely unrelated languages in order to communicate with them all. So that’s why most people have to specialize. Ethan, on the other hand, can pick up a new ‘language’ at the drop of a hat.”
And it gave Kimber a serious inferiority complex on top of the normal sibling rivalry. I couldn’t blame her, especially when Ethan seemed to enjoy lording his abilities over her.
“So is it some special language of magic you guys speak when you cast spells?” I asked.
She shook her head. “The words don’t matter. The language thing was just an analogy. People who are really good at magic can even use gestures instead of words. You just have to teach the magic that when you say ‘abracadabra,’ it means you want it to lock the door.”
I nodded sagely, still not sure I really got it, but figuring any further explanation would just make my head hurt. I decided it was high time I asked the question that was eating at me more and more as Kimber explained things. “Can Aunt Grace use magic to find me?”
“If she could, she’d have done it already. Locating spells are hard—finding someone or something that isn’t there is kind of an abstract concept and hard to communicate—so it’s one of those categories you really have to specialize in to be any good at.”
Well that was a relief, at least. “Does Aunt Grace have a specialty?”
Kimber looked kinda grim. “Yeah.”
“Well, what is it?” I prompted.
Kimber sighed. “Attack magic.”
And that blew my temporary relief right out of the water.
• • •
By the time Kimber had finished her extra-strength posset, she was distinctly mellow. I wouldn’t go so far as to say I was mellow myself, but I was a lot more relaxed than I’d been since I’d first set foot in Avalon. I’d never had a real close friend before. Sure, there’d been girls at my various schools who I’d sit with at lunch, or hang with for a while after school. But whenever I started to get close to someone, Mom would insist it was time for us to move again, and I’d be forced to start over at square one at my new school. After a while, getting too close was just more trouble than it was worth.
I was relaxed enough that I decided to ask a question that had been bugging me since I’d first caught sight of Kimber’s apartment. Was it only last night? I felt like I’d been here for years.
“How come your parents let you have your own apartment?” My mom wasn’t the most nurturing mother on the planet, but I had a feeling even
she
would balk at letting a sixteen-year-old live by herself.
Kimber looked down and away, and I knew I’d asked a sensitive question.
“Sorry,” I said, wishing I could suck my words back. “I’ll stop being so nosy.”
Kimber looked up and forced a smile. “It’s all right. You just hit a nerve, that’s all.”
I made to apologize again, but she cut me off with a gesture. “No, I mean it, it’s okay.” She let out a heavy sigh and seemed to brace herself before she began.
“My mom’s been out of the picture since I was ten,” she said, fidgeting with the ends of her hair while she talked. “She decided she wanted to go back to Faerie, but my dad was born in Avalon and wouldn’t leave. They agreed that Ethan and I would stay with Dad, and it’s been the three of us ever since.
“I’m sure my dad loves me in his own way, but he doesn’t really try to hide that Ethan’s his favorite. Well, Ethan wanted to move into student housing as soon as he graduated high school, and because whatever Ethan wants, Ethan gets, Dad let him.
“Dad and I had a big fight a while later, and I told him I wanted to move out. I told him that since I was in college like Ethan, I should have my own apartment like Ethan.” Her eyes shimmered with tears, and her voice softened until it was little more than a whisper. “He said okay.”
I winced in sympathy. “Your dad must have been pretty dense not to get that he was supposed to say no.”
She laughed and blinked away the tears. “My dad is many things, but dense isn’t one of them. He knew what I wanted—he just didn’t care.” She took a deep breath and straightened her spine. “But it’s not that big a difference anyway. He’s a total workaholic, so he’s never home. I don’t really see him any less now than I did when I lived at home.”
Maybe my mom wasn’t so bad after all. All her embarrassing, neglectful, and downright stupid behavior was caused by alcohol. I knew that somewhere, buried beneath the booze-brain, was a loving mother. Kimber didn’t even have that.
“I think your dad really
is
dense,” I told Kimber. “He’s got to be if he doesn’t realize how lucky he is to have you.”
Her cheeks pinkened. “Thanks. But you don’t have to try to make me feel better. I’ve … come to terms with it.”
Yeah, right, I thought but didn’t say.
“Do you mind if I ask
you
something?” Kimber said.
“After all the questions I’ve lobbed your way, it’s gotta be your turn.”
“Why did you run away from home?”
I grimaced. Why did it have to be
that
question? “Geez, does
everyone
know I ran away?” I asked, trying to deflect the question. I’d never told anyone that my mom was a drunk—in fact, I’d gone to great lengths to avoid having anyone find out—and I wasn’t about to change that now.
One corner of Kimber’s mouth tipped up. “The fact that you’ve never shown any interest in calling home for help was kind of a giveaway, but I didn’t know for sure until now.”
“Oh.” I looked away from her too-knowing stare. “I don’t want to talk about it, okay?”
“Sure,” Kimber agreed, but I could tell my closing the conversational door in her face hurt her feelings. She forced a smile. “I feel an attack of the munchies coming on.”
She hopped to her feet, and without thinking about it, I reached out and grabbed her arm to stop her from fleeing the room. After the way she’d just opened her heart to me, it would be completely bitchy of me to shut her out. I was going to have to bite the bullet and talk about my least favorite subject in the world.
“Sit down,” I told her, giving her arm a little yank. “I’m sorry. It’s just…”
I let go of her arm, and Kimber sank back down onto the bed. “You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to,” she said gently. “You’ve known me for less than twenty-four hours. I shouldn’t expect you to treat me like your BFF.”
“It’s okay—it’s been an intense twenty-four hours.”
She laughed faintly. “That it has.”
I blew out a deep breath. My heart was pounding almost as hard as when I’d been hiding in the closet, and my shoulder muscles were so tight they hurt. But I knew I was overreacting. Kimber might look like the bitchy, popular cheerleader-type who could sneer at me if she knew about my mom, but she didn’t act like it. Besides, it wasn’t like there was a school full of other kids she could spread the story to.
Bracing myself for shock, or pity, or disgust, I forced my shameful secret out through gritted teeth. “My mom’s an alcoholic.” There. I’d said it. Out loud.
Kimber just sat there, waiting for me to continue. “And?” she prompted, when I didn’t say anything else.
I stared at her. “Does there have to be more?”
She blinked. “Well, no. I guess not. It’s just that you gave it so much build-up I thought it was going to be some horrible, dark secret, like she had a boyfriend who abused you or something.”
Of all the reactions I’d been expecting, this wasn’t one of them. “So you don’t think my mom being a drunk is a big deal?”
She shrugged. “Sure, it’s a big deal to you—you had to live with her. It’s just … I don’t know. It’s not a stop-the-presses, red-alert, danger-Will-Robinson kind of thing.”
“Danger Will Robinson?”
“You know,
Lost in Space
.”
I made a zooming-over-my-head motion.
Kimber made a mock-horror face. “It’s a classic! But anyway, the point is, in the grand scheme of shocking news, an alcoholic mom just isn’t that high up there.”
It’s funny, but I’d been worried that she’d look down on me when she knew—and I was glad she didn’t. But it was such an anticlimax compared to what I’d been expecting that I swear I was almost disappointed. I mean, here I’d gone and told her this terrible secret, the one I’d never told anyone in my life … and she was all like, “Yawn.”
“The kids at my last school thought it was pretty shocking,” I protested. “They made my life a living hell when they found out.”
She waved that off. “Yeah, but they were kids.”
“Uh, newsflash:
we’re
kids.”
“But we’re not normal kids,” she said, and the words hit me like a kick in the gut. “I’m a sixteen-year-old college sophomore who lives on her own, and you’re a Faeriewalker. Normal doesn’t apply to us.”
The truth of her words was hard to deny, although I’d been denying it for a very long time. I’d always tried to be as normal as possible under the circumstances, and I’d always known I’dfallen short. I just hadn’t wanted to admit it.
“Hey, at least we can be not normal together now,” Kimber said, and I couldn’t help smiling.
“Who needs normal?” I responded. “Normal’s
boring
.”
And, at least for that moment, I actually meant it.
Kimber and I both leapt to our feet when we heard the distinctive sound of the front door opening and closing, then of footsteps coming from the direction of the kitchen.
“It’s just me,” Ethan called before we had a chance to get too worried.
He appeared in the bedroom doorway a moment later, a cocky grin on his face. My heart did a little ka-thump at the sight of him.
“You look terribly proud of yourself,” Kimber said, using the sour tone I’d once thought was the only one she had.
His grin broadened. “I am rather brilliant, if I do say so myself.”
“Which you do on a regular basis.”
He was undaunted by the ribbing. “After I saw Grace this afternoon, I knew someone would be keeping a close eye on the two of us,” he said.
“Wow, brilliant deduction.”
Ethan made a mock pouty-face. “You’re ruining the story.” I could tell by the look on her face how heartbroken Kimber was about that, but she resisted the urge to come out with another quip.
“I figured being constantly watched would rather cramp our style. So I managed to ditch my tail, and then came straight here.” He looked at Kimber expectantly, but she shook her head.
“I’m not in the mood to play your straight man.”
He turned the same expectant look on me, and my heart did another one of those ka-thumps. I couldn’t
not
give him what he wanted, not when he was looking at me like that.
“How did you ditch your tail?” I asked, and hoped I didn’t sound breathless.
His chest swelled with obvious pride. “I’ve finally got my invisibility spell working.”
“This would be the spell you’ve used to make yourself invisible but that doesn’t work on your clothes?” Kimber asked with a raise of her brows. She grinned at me. “He thought he was so clever, trying to sneak up on me, but the moving shirt, pants, and shoes kind of gave him away.”