Goddess Born (25 page)

Read Goddess Born Online

Authors: Kari Edgren

“What are you doing out here?” I walked over to her and placed my hand on her back. Very carefully I allowed just enough power to trickle from my fingers to take a quick look inside. The baby’s heartbeat lacked proper strength, but she was alive, and I was going to make sure she stayed that way.

“I’ve been waiting at the window, watching for you.” She sounded in decent spirits, though I could feel her fear coursing back into me.

I looked a bit further to see how far her cervix had opened. Labor was traumatic enough on healthy babies. This little girl needed to come out quickly, before the stress became too much for her heart to bear. “How long in between the pains?” I asked.

“About five minutes.”

I glanced around at the room full of men, most of them still armed. “Let’s go into your bedroom.”

She nodded and leaned onto my arm for support. I got her situated in a rocking chair beside the bed before going back out to speak with Matthew. “The baby is coming tonight. I’ll need lots of towels and plenty of hot water.” I turned to Ben. “Can you fetch my leather case from the apothecary?”

He nodded and went to the door.

“William, I’m safe now if you want to go home.”

“I should stay,” he said stubbornly, still holding onto the sword and pistol as though danger lurked in every corner, just waiting to grab me.

“It would be of greater service,” Henry said, “for you and Nora to start telling people how Selah got that scar. I don’t want anyone going to bed tonight thinking it was made by the Devil.”

William looked unsure for a moment. “Very well,” he finally said. “I’ll go fetch Nora from the meetinghouse. Between the two of us, we should be able to get the truth spread around by bedtime.” He started for the door.

“You might want to leave the weapons here,” I suggested. “People are probably already wondering why a good Quaker man has agreed to take up arms—even if it was for a really good cause.”
Like saving my life.
Hopefully there would be no talk of having him disowned for the infraction.

Reluctantly, William left the sword and pistol in Henry’s keeping, and then set off for the meetinghouse to find his sister.

A soft groan came from the bedroom. Matthew looked at me pleadingly, the color draining from his face. “She’s going to be fine,” I said, taking his arm. “Just get me those towels and water.” Unable to move, he stood there staring at me.

Henry came up and put a hand on his shoulder. “Let’s go find the servant.” He gently turned Matthew toward the kitchen. Coming back to his senses, Matthew nodded, and went with Henry.

With the men gone, I went back into the bedroom to check on Susanna. She was breathing hard again, a piece of thickly knotted rope clamped tightly in her hands as she worked through the pain. I placed my hand on her stomach to hear the baby’s heart again. The beat had weakened noticeably, but the cervix remained tight. At this rate labor was going to take hours, and by then the baby would surely be dead.

“Susanna, when this pain has passed, I need you to come over and lie down.”

She nodded, her teeth clenched against the pain.

“They’re getting harder,” she panted. I helped her onto the bed and waited for the next pain to hit. As her abdomen tightened to a ball, I released a small wave of warmth into her body to help expand the cervix. I had to go slowly, a fraction of an inch at a time, so not to cause undue trauma to Susanna’s body. With a weak baby to contend with, I couldn’t risk putting the mother into shock.

Susanna grunted as each contraction forced her body further open. I took a long wooden needle from my case Ben had fetched from Brighmor, and very carefully inserted it into the birth canal to break the water sack. Fluid rushed out, soaking the towels on the bed.

“It’s time to start pushing,” I said. “At this next contraction, I want you to grab your knees and bear down for all you’re worth. The sooner this baby comes out the better.”

Susanna met my eyes with a look of sheer determination. I kept my hand on her stomach, waiting for the muscles to begin tightening again. She cried out from the pain, but grabbed her knees and pushed.

“That’s right,” I said, “just like that.” More warmth flowed from my hand and I guided the baby down into the birth canal. Fortunately, she wasn’t very big, weighing about a third of a stone. The contraction ebbed, and Susanna lay back on the bed panting, her red face dripping with sweat.

“A few more like that and this baby will be out,” I reassured her.

Susanna tried to smile, but it turned into a grimace from the next pain. Grabbing her knees, she pushed again, and with my help the baby cleared the tailbone. “The head has crowned,” I said, at the sight of the thick black hair. “One more contraction should clear it. Then another for the body and you’ll be done.”

As the next contraction mounted, the baby’s heartbeat suddenly dropped.
Oh
,
no you don’t!
I thought desperately. Power flowed into Susanna’s belly as I focused on keeping that little heart beating. “Push, Susanna! This baby needs to come out now!”

Responding to the tension in my voice, Susanna bore down with newfound strength, pushing the head free. I surrounded the tiny heart with fire to keep it beating. Another pain started and Susanna pushed again, crying out from the effort.

The baby slipped free from the birth canal onto the bed. Healthy infants have a strong reddish complexion at birth. This little girl was pale, verging on ashen. She gave a weak cry as she struggled to fill her lungs for the first time. Leaving one hand on Susanna’s belly, I placed the other right on the infant’s chest. Then, closing my eyes, I concentrated on her heart. Nothing else was going to improve until this problem was fixed.

I had looked at enough hearts over the years to immediately see the defect in the left pumping chamber. It was small and underdeveloped compared to the others. I focused on this specific area, allowing a great surge of warmth to pour from my hand into her body. The baby jolted from the energy, and started crying with more force.

“It’s a girl,” I said, my voice deceptively calm. “With dark hair just like her mother.” More energy flowed into the baby as I worked to develop the chamber to its proper size.

Finished with the birthing, Susanna had collapsed back on the bed, exhausted. “Will she live?” she asked, her voice raspy from crying out during the pains.

The baby’s heart responded, its beat strengthening and increasing in speed. Her color also improved from the air now moving through her body. “Oh, she’s going to live,” I laughed. “And by her first birthday she’ll be causing more trouble than you can imagine.”

Susanna quietly wept with joy. After so many years and losses, she was finally a mother.

It took several long minutes for the baby’s heart to stabilize and begin beating well on its own. Her cries strengthened, becoming lusty as she filled her lungs to capacity. Taking a pair of scissors from my case, I cut the cord and tied it off.

“What are you going to name her?” I asked.

“Megan after Matthew’s mother. And Elizabeth for you and your mother. My daughter’s life is a testament of truth to anyone who dares to doubt you.”

Tears temporarily blurred my vision. “Thank you, Susanna,” I said, brushing my eyes with my sleeve.

“You’re the one who needs thanking. This girl is alive because of you, and I’ll make sure everyone in Hopewell knows it.”

I wiped the baby clean with some warm water and then swaddled her in a linen towel. “Megan Elizabeth Appleton,” I said, handing her gently to Susanna. “It’s high time you met your mother.”

Susanna’s face lit up with joy. It took very little encouragement to get Meg suckling, and within minutes she was asleep at her mother’s breast.

“I’ll go get Matthew,” I said, a lump forming in my throat. Wandering through the empty house, I found the men sitting together in the kitchen over cups of cider.

Matthew stood up so quickly he nearly toppled the cups. “How is she?” he asked.

“Susanna and Megan are both doing just fine.”

He looked unsure. “The baby is going to live?” he asked, his voice guarded like he hadn’t expected to hear this news.

“She’s small, but I’m certain she’ll live.” Her little body was now perfect, inside and out.

His mouth broke into a broad smile. One moment my feet were firmly on the ground and the next I was twirling in a circle with my face pressed into Matthew’s shirt. “You’re an angel,” he cried, “sent straight from heaven!”

I stumbled slightly when my feet found the floor again. “Not an angel, exactly,” I said smiling back, “Would you like to see them?”

Matthew darted from the room, grinning like a child. Weary from the past few hours, I sat down in the empty seat, and rested my head on the table.

“Well done, Selah,” Henry said. “Once this gets around, your name will be cleared for good.”

“Do you really think so?” I lifted my head just enough to see him.

“How could it not? Nathan practically accused you of killing this baby tonight. Her life proves your innocence.”

It was hard to believe that something so small as Megan could be that important to my future. “She’s a testament of truth,” I said softly, and then looked Henry in the eyes. “Thank you for not doubting me. I wouldn’t have gotten through this without your help.”

Henry gazed at me, his expression so tender that I nearly melted on the spot. “Oh, you would have done just fine,” he said. “But I’m glad to be here all the same.”

We stayed at the Appletons’ for most of the night so I could keep a close watch on Megan. About every half hour I went into the bedroom and placed my hand on her chest to confirm that her heart was working properly. Near dawn, I decided we could leave.

Bidding Matthew and Susanna goodbye, Henry went out first to collect the shay that had been left around the corner next to the dry goods store. I intended to wait in the house, but finding myself in need of some fresh air, I stepped outside instead. It was still dark, and I leaned back against the door to draw in a slow, deep breath.

Movement flickered close beside me. Turning my head to the side, I watched Nathan emerge from the shadows. “Have you finished the Devil’s work?” he asked. The darkness blurred his face, but I knew he was smirking.

“The baby lives,” I said quietly, not wishing to wake any of the neighbors and risk another public spectacle. “By your own words my innocence has been proven. No one will believe you now.”

“Impossible!” Nathan hissed. “He told me it would surely die!”

A shiver passed up my spine. “Who told you that?” I demanded.

Taking no heed of my question, he stepped so near I could feel his coat buttons through my bodice. “And she shall stand before you, a servant of the Devil,” he said, his voice ragged with rage.

Neatly pinned between Nathan and the door, there was nowhere to go. “Henry just went for the carriage,” I warned him. “You’re good as dead if he finds you here.”

My warning went ignored. He raised a hand and pressed two fingers over my right eye. “And if thy right eye offend you, pluck it out, and cast it from thee. For it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell.”

I jerked my head to the side. “You’ll not quote scriptures to me! Pluck out your own eye if you’re so inclined, but leave me alone.”

Nathan moved closer, pushing me against the door. Then lowering his hand, he took hold of my right arm. “And if thy right hand offend thee, cut it off, and cast it from thee. For it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body be cast into hell!”

I yanked my arm from his grip. “You do not speak for God! Go away or I’ll scream!”

Nathan placed his cheek against mine, putting his mouth right up to my ear. “It is better that one should perish than a whole town be cast into hell,” he whispered menacingly.

Blood pounded in my veins. “I’m not afraid of you!”

The sound of carriage wheels came through the darkness. “Your time is nigh,” Nathan said. He stepped away and faded back into the shadows.

Chapter Sixteen

The Price of Silence

Henry came into my room, rousing me from sleep. “Good morning,” he said cheerfully. Going first to the windows, he opened the drapes, and then took a seat on my bed. “I’ve good and bad news. Which would you like to hear first?”

I yawned and sat up. “What time is it?” It had been near sunrise when I crawled into bed after spending most of the night at the Appletons’.

“Half past three. You’ve missed both breakfast and noon meal so I’ve asked Mary to bring up a tea tray.”

“That sounds wonderful.” As my eyes adjusted to the sunlight, I noticed Henry was cleanly shaven and in fresh clothes. Feeling a bit self-conscious, I ran a hand through my tangled hair. “Didn’t you sleep?” I asked him.

“For an hour this morning. Since then I’ve been in town to speak with George McKee and to get a better sense of what people are thinking today.”

“And what have you learned?” I eyed my hairbrush on the dressing table. It was one thing if we both looked in a state, but he was his usual perfectly groomed self. I surreptitiously ran a finger around my mouth to check for any drool marks.

“Would you like the good or bad news first?” he asked again.

“Oh, start with the good.”

“Well, from what I can gather most people have decided you’re not a witch. William and Nora made sure everyone knew how that scar was made, and word has already spread about your saving Megan Appleton.”

This was good news indeed, good enough to make me temporarily forget my disheveled appearance.

“There are some, of course, who believe Nathan, but theirs is by far the minority opinion. We’ll have a better idea where everyone stands this Saturday night, when we see who attends the wedding celebration at the Oswalds’. To show their support, Edgar and Gideon have even decreed that the Quakers may stay for the entire party without being censured so long as they don’t actually participate in the dancing.”

I smiled, knowing Nora must be thrilled by this good fortune. Not being officially Quaker, I had attended numerous balls since coming out into society. Nora, on the other hand, had to be content with a secondhand recounting the next morning. Finally, she could experience the gaiety and splendor for herself.

From everything Henry had told me, only one dark shadow remained. “Did you report how Nathan threatened me this morning?”

“I did. And that, I’m afraid, is the bad news.”

“What do you mean?” I had hoped to hear that Nathan was sitting in a dark cell right now, reflecting on the impropriety of openly declaring his intentions to kill me.

“After I relayed the threat to George, he sent a deputy out to Nathan’s farm. He wasn’t there, and according to his housekeeper, he hasn’t been home since yesterday afternoon. The town’s been searched, but there’s no sign of him.”

I frowned. “What about the servant who’s been helping him? I’ll wager she’s privy to his whereabouts.”

“I’ve already spoken to the maids. No one knows anything, or so they are saying.”

“Well, someone is obviously lying and I’ll not tolerate it a moment longer. The whole lot of them will be dismissed at once.” I had reached my wit’s end, living for so long with a duplicitous maid. “Mrs. Ryan can stay, of course, since she would no more betray me than Ben. She was also at Brighmor the night the bed warmer fell open at the Goodwins’, as was Karta. I don’t think either of these ladies would point to something that could be so easily disproved. The rest will have to go, though.”

Henry shook his head. “Our best bet is to wait until Nathan is caught. Then he can lead us to the accomplice without our putting innocent girls out on the street. Besides, now that he is gone, the two-faced maid will have no one to tell your secrets to. I believe she is harmless enough for the time being.”

Harmless or not, I disliked living with the wicked creature, but Henry had a point about the other girls. Very little would be accomplished by throwing out a handful of servants when the real trouble was still at large. “Where do you think Nathan is?”

“There’s some talk that he’s gone mad and is hiding out in the forest. George thinks he went to Philadelphia to make a formal complaint against you.”

I crinkled my brow. “And what do you think?”

“Nathan is certainly not in his right mind at present, but George is probably right. Just the same, I don’t want you wondering around in the woods alone.”

Henry didn’t have to say anything more for me to know exactly what he meant. Without divulging my entire secret, there was no way to explain that healing Meg Appleton had taken a great deal of my strength, and that I had planned to visit the Otherworld tonight. I dropped my eyes to the bed covers, hoping he hadn’t already guessed at my intentions.

“Is it something you have to do?” he asked quietly.

I considered denying it, but then simply nodded.

“Can I go with you?”

“I don’t know,” I said, looking back up at him. It was an odd idea having Henry stand by while I went through the rituals necessary to enter the Otherworld. “I can wait a few more days. Maybe Nathan will be found by then.” If not, I didn’t know what I would do.

* * *

No sign of Nathan emerged over the next two days, confirming the constable’s belief that he was currently in Philadelphia, petitioning the various magistrates to formally charge me. Having already made it through one inquiry, I felt more confident about surviving another, especially now that Nathan’s vision had been discredited in regards to my scar and the baby.

By Saturday morning my worries had changed entirely and I was so preoccupied with the prospect of dancing with Henry at our wedding ball that I could hardly spare another thought for any trouble Nathan might be stirring up. With so much to celebrate, I wanted to be merry, but my mood was dampened by the real possibility that my power could betray me once again. Still unable to fully control it in his presence, I feared that in my excitement it might bubble up to the surface the very minute Henry led me to the dance floor.

Weighed down by this concern, I went upstairs to my room in the late afternoon to get ready. My mind was fully distracted—partly with the preparations, but mostly with Henry—when I heard heated voices and walked into the midst of an argument. Alice and Mary stood by my dressing table, glaring so intently at each other that my presence went unnoticed.

“Yer up to no good, Mary Finney. Let it alone or I’ll tell every bit I know.”

“Ye shan’t do nothing of the sort,” Mary said. “She’ll come to no harm, not while I’ve still breath to live by.”

I looked between the two girls, anxious to hear what they would say next. Who would come to no harm and what did Alice know?

Alice saw me first and clamped her mouth shut before any of my questions could be answered. Bobbing a curtsy, she rushed from the room without another word.

“What was that all about?” I asked Mary.

“Nothing, ma’am, just a small tiff between some of the servants. Yer gown is laid out if yer ready to be dressed.”

I glanced over at the bed and saw a shower of lilac French silk with clusters of soft white flowers painted on the bodice. My anxiety over Henry rushed back, pushing aside any more thoughts concerning the girls’ argument.

With Mary’s help I managed to get into the gown, which was so well fitted that my stays had to be pulled extra tight to give my waist the right curve, while pushing up my bosom just enough to peek over the lace trimmed neckline. Normally, I would have worn a linen fichu, neatly pinned or tucked into the bodice to conceal such an excess of skin, but not tonight.

Once the dress was in place, Mary started on my hair, looping up the dark curls. She was undoubtedly the most talented hairdresser in all of Hopewell, and it vexed me to think that I might have to let her go.

My hair finished, I powdered my nose and slipped in a pair of pearl earrings. Then with one last look in the mirror, I grabbed my fan and gloves and went downstairs to the drawing room, where I found Henry staring out the window. He turned at the sound of my footsteps, stopping me dead in my tracks. Already an extremely handsome man, he was absolutely resplendent in a sage green velvet coat and breeches and an ivory satin waistcoat, embroidered along the edges. Seeing me, he also seemed caught off guard for a moment. Quickly recovering, he crossed the room, and took me in from head to toe. A faint blush colored my cheeks as his eyes lingered on my uncovered neckline.

“You are a vision of beauty.” He took my hand and pressed it against his lips.

Feeling his mouth on my skin again, I had to fight the urge to throw my arms around him. “Thank you,” I said, hoping he couldn’t hear the quiver in my voice, and pulled my hand away under the pretense of needing to put on my gloves. We hadn’t even made it out of the house yet, and I could feel the warmth stirring in my chest.

Alice came into the room to announce that Ben had brought the shay up from the carriage house. “Ye also have a visitor, ma’am. One of those Lenape men is waiting outside to speak with ye.”

“Did he say what he wanted?” A trip to the Lenape village would be one way to avoid dancing tonight.

“No, ma’am. Just asked for ye is all.”

“We will not be fording any rivers tonight,” Henry warned on our way outside. “I intend to dance with my wife at our wedding party.”

Unfortunately, Henry didn’t understand how little choice I had in the matter. If someone asked for help, Brigid’s law bound me to give it.

Teme stood next to his horse some twenty feet from the shay. “I’m sure it’s nothing serious,” I said, though more than a little anxious at seeing him here. “It’ll just take a minute.”“Good evening, Teme,” I said, walking over. The lowering sun lit up his long black hair and brown skin. Though he wore a pair of doeskin pants, I could clearly remember the last time I had seen him, lying naked in the longhouse.

“Tenteyuawen, I have come to thank you for saving my life.”

“You’re welcome. It was an honor to help so great a man.”

I hadn’t noticed he was holding something until he opened his hand. “This is a gift for you.” In his palm was a necklace made of small white shells. “Will you wear it?”

I smiled and pulled in a quick breath. “I would love to.”

In all the years I had known Teme, I had never seen him nervous. His fingers trembled slightly as he lifted the choker and carefully tied it around my neck. It was about two inches wide, made of four rows of shells, delicately woven together.

The necklace in place, he quickly withdrew his hands back to his side. “I have heard you are having trouble with your people.”

Good news travels fast
,
and bad news doubly so.
“A Quaker minister accused me of being a witch,” I confirmed.

Teme shook his head in disbelief. “Your spirit burns with light. You are not evil.”

“Not everyone can see me like the Lenape. My people do not want to believe that burning spirits walk in this world. I must hide my power to keep them from fearing me.”

“If you are banished from your people, I will take you into my home.” Teme glanced over my shoulder at Henry. “I will protect you from the Quaker minister or anyone else who would harm you.”

My eyes grew wide with understanding. “Thank you, Teme. You do me a great honor. But Henry has promised to stay with me.” For now, at least.

Teme shifted his gaze back to me, his eyes pausing for a moment on the strands of shells clasped around my neck. “Come to my village if there is trouble. You will be safe with my people.” He turned and swung onto his horse.

“I’m sure I’ll be fine,” I said, looking up to him. “The constable has already cleared me of the charges.”

These last words did nothing to convince him. “The Lenape hear many things. I will stay close.”

I was about to protest when Teme dug his heels into the horse’s side, urging the beast down the drive. Footsteps sounded in the gravel behind me, and I turned to see Henry approaching.

“Are you ready to go?” he asked.

I nodded, feeling a bit dazed from my conversation with Teme.

“That’s a charming necklace. Did Teme just give it to you?”

“It’s for healing him.” I ran my fingers over the smooth shells. Judging by the way Teme had looked at me, the gift had meant much more.

Henry inspected my neck. “Rather nice payment for pulling a tooth. Is that why he came to see you?”

I started in surprise, but then remembered telling the fib to cover up Teme’s lockjaw. “Yes,” I said quickly. “And to ask about Nathan. It seems the Lenape are well aware of my problems. Teme has just offered to take me into his home if necessary.”

Henry’s brows came together. “Why would that ever be necessary?”

“If you were to believe the charges and throw me out of Brighmor.”

“So he’s asking for you to be his
wife
? Does he not understand that you’re already married?”

My heart skipped over his question, and I gazed at him without blinking. “Are we really married?” I asked, somewhat hesitant.
Are you ready to give up your previous life and live in Pennsylvania as Henry Kilbrid?
Are you ready to accept that I am Goddess Born?

Henry stared at me, unspeaking, and I glimpsed the inner torment playing out in his beautiful green eyes. “We...” he started before swallowing hard over the remaining words.

I leaned forward in tense anticipation.
What are we?

A shadow passed over his face, and he pulled his gaze from mine, letting it fall to the ground. “We’re going to be late.”

Henry guided the horses into a field adjoining the Oswalds’ house. The surprising number of carriages and wagons already lined up promised a good showing.

Lanterns lit up the grounds, and we followed a path to the far side where the dinner was to be held. As we rounded the house, a large crowd of people came into sight, milling about and chatting. Every household who owned land, operated a business, or held a professional position in Hopewell had been invited. From what I could tell, the number of people present exceeded the original guest list, and my heart swelled with gratitude at this open show of support.

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