Good Stepbrother (Love #2) (17 page)

“Do you like chicken legs?” I asked her, and she giggled.

“Icken!”

“This quinoa salad is delish!” Mindy raved, taking another bite of my salad.

Kirby swished water around in his mouth and blurted, “It’s like eating insects! Crunchy. No offense, but it’s not my favorite.”

I snorted with laughter. “It’s okay. Insects? Really? What were you and Carter doing as kids?”

“Who says we were kids when we ate them?” Kirby teased me, and I giggled again.

I liked having dinner with them. If you’d asked me if I thought we could have a great dinner six months before? I would’ve laughed you out of the room. But it was fun.

A couple of hours later, we loaded in their minivan and they drove me home. I was silent most of the ride.
I wonder if Carter will be at the house or if he will avoid me?
I knew better than to go to the garage. I wouldn’t be welcome. It would be hard sleeping alone after sleeping with him for weeks. It was what he wanted. Space from me.

Kirby pulled up in the yard and threw the van into park. “It was fun having you over. We’ll have to do it again,” he smiled back at me.

“We will!” Mindy reached back and patted my arm. “Thank you so much for the blanket, it’s gorgeous. And for the doll.”

“You’re welcome. Kirby, could we get together maybe one night during the week to record? I can get in a small basement setup here?”

“Sure! I’ll call you. House number’s in the phone book, right?”

“It is. I look forward to it. Thanks again, guys.” Opening the door, I stepped out into the warm night and waved as they backed out of the drive.

Tears streamed down my cheeks as I puttered up the drive. Charlie opened the back door and sighed. “Hey, kiddo.”

“Mind if I stay here a while?” I climbed the stairs and wiped at my eyes.

“Of course not. Trouble in paradise?”

Stepping into the house, I shrugged. “I don’t really want to talk about it. It’ll be okay. I think I just want to go upstairs to bed. Hey, is it okay if I use the basement as a recording studio? I can get a small setup…” I asked hopefully.

Charlie nodded as he closed the door. “Sure. Whatever you need, honey. The house is part yours.”

“Thanks, Charlie.” I impulsively hugged him. “I love you.” I’d never told him that before. He stilled for a moment then hugged me back.

Gruffly, he whispered, “I love you too, kiddo.”

Pulling away, I hurried upstairs and threw myself across my bed and cried. I couldn’t believe Carter’s reaction to me wanting to pursue music. Music was who I was. He had to understand that just because I loved music, it didn’t mean I would leave him. He was stuck with me.

***

Weeks passed and we didn’t speak. I slowly went insane. Instead of falling apart, I spent a lot of time down in the recording studio I’d had set up. I wrote music, and I talked to Logan.

“How are you doing?” he asked me late one night after I sang to him my latest song.

“I’m okay.”

“I hate that he’s treating you like this,” Logan sighed. “You need a guy who gets that music is a part of you.”

Shaking my head, I groaned. “Logan, you know I love you, but not like that. Carter’s been hurt by me before, and he’s just processing. He’ll come around eventually, and we’ll be okay again.”

“I’m always here for you. If you ever get tired of being jerked around by him, I’m here.”

“Logan, I know. But it can’t be like that between us. You’ll always be one of my dearest friends, but I’m in love with Carter.”

“I know.”

Pushing my hair back, I rubbed my eyes. “I’m not trying to lead you on. I just need a friend.”

“You’re not, babe. I know you love him. I just keep hoping that one day you’ll see me as I see you.”

“I don’t think I can. I wish you’d find a nice girl, settle down.”

He chuckled. “Maybe one day, Brielle the beautiful. So have you been recording?”

I was grateful he changed the subject. “Yeah, I have been. Kirby has been coming Tuesday and Saturday nights, we’ve been working hard. I think I have something ready to send out to a couple of labels.”

“That’s exciting! I’m really proud of you. It’s good to see you excited about music again. Bri Harper who ate pizza on my couch and crashed into rehab wasn’t excited about music anymore. Brielle Harper is excited about it again.”

“Thank you. I am excited, and it feels good.”

“Keep writing and recording and before you know it, you’ll have enough for an album.”

“I will. I’m getting pretty tired. Thanks for listening to me, Logan. You’re a great friend.” I smiled and held the phone a little closer to my ear.

“I’m always here for you, babe,” Logan murmured roughly, and I squeezed my eyes shut.

“I know. ‘Night, Logan.”

“Sweet dreams, beautiful.”

Hanging up, I covered my eyes with my hand and flopped back on the pillows. I loved Logan, like a best friend. He was a great guy, and a part of me wished I could walk away from Carter and start a life with Logan. It would be a simple kind of love. It would be easy. It just wouldn’t be the turbulence and wildfire that it was with Carter.

I liked the wildness of our love, and I wasn’t sure I could ever live with a domesticated kind of romance. Curling up on my side, I breathed deeply. I wondered how much longer it would be before Carter and I worked things out. I needed him back in my life. Sooner rather than later.

***

Another week went by and I grew desperate. I considered sneaking into the garage wearing almost nothing and seducing him, but that wasn’t how I wanted Carter back. The words he’d said hurt, and I didn’t want to lure him in with my body. I wasn’t that girl anymore. So instead I worked on my music. My favorite song was still a work in progress, it was about how I felt after our argument.

“Write what you know, say what you feel,” Logan told me. “It’ll never come out wrong.”

I was lost in my music, singing the lyrics, trying to get a feel for how I wanted the music to go. Kirby would be at the studio in a couple of days, and I really needed to hammer out the words before he came to play.

“Give me freedom and give me home,

hold me close and let me go,

tie me up and let me loose,

remove your hands, they’re not my noose

love me, leave me, cut me deep

you’re not the only one losing sleep

all I wanted was you

all I needed was you

but it takes two to fall in love

it takes two to make a home

Chase me out say I’m running away

Don’t even give me the time of day

Scream my name and cuss me out

this ain’t what love’s all about

Romance novels don’t tell the story

they just give the sweet stuff all the glory

He’s too damn scared to hold me near

still just a little boy full of fear

all I wanted was you

all I needed was you

but it takes two to fall in love

it takes two to make a home

I can’t take you pulling me in and pushing me out

this ain’t what love’s supposed to be about…”

Groaning, I sighed, “No, that’s not it yet! Dammit!” The words just weren’t there and I was annoyed.

Suddenly, my headphones were ripped from my head, and I turned, swinging at the invisible person. I nearly connected with Carter’s hard stomach. “Holy shit, Carter, I almost hit you! Don’t sneak up on me!”

“I am not a little boy. I am not scared of you. I’m scared of losing you. If that song’s about me, you better change it because you’re wrong about me.”

Backing up slowly, I whispered, “That song is about you. It’s how you make me feel.”

“Want to know how you make me feel? You’re driving me crazy. I’m waiting for you to run. Holding on for the sky to fall isn’t fun. You can’t build a home on shaky ground. You’re twisting me up and turning me around, you’re tearing me up and I’m letting you drown.”

“Wait, what?” I pushed a button on the keyboard in front of me and his voice came through the speakers. “That’s…that’s good!”

“I’m not helping you write a fucking song. I’m telling you how I feel!”

“And it was good…I’m just saying. Why are you here and why are you manhandling me? I’m not your property.”

“I’m here to talk.”

“Then talk.” Crossing my arms over my chest, I stared him down.

“I feel like you’re going to leave, again,” he admitted.

“A bird has to leave the nest on occasion.” I shrugged.

“You’re not a bird.”

“I’m not going to stay locked up in Marysville the rest of my life. I do have Chronic Fatigue, but I’m not dead. I still have dreams. Singing is my life. I’m not going to give that up for you or anyone. So unless you can handle my gypsy feet and occasional need to run, then get out of here.”

“This is my damn house!” he roared.

Wincing, I tossed my hair over my shoulder. “I don’t care. It’s mine too.”

“I-you…I help pay the bills here.”

“And I helped to pay off the mortgage. Do we want to keep going?”

He paused. “You did what?”

“I paid off the mortgage.”

“When?”

“Last month when the bill came.” It had come days before Christmas and I’d paid it. It was pocket change for me. I wanted to pay it off for Charlie, so he didn’t have to worry anymore.

“You had no right!” Carter yelled.

“Why? I can help.”

“I’m doing just fine without your help. Dad is too.”

“Funny, I remember Charlie drinking heavily when I came to visit back in December, and now he barely drinks a six pack a week and he’s working again. So…remind me again how you were doing just so great, Carter.”

“Fuck you,” he growled.

“You wish,” I snapped. Frowning, I sighed. “Stop.”

“What?”

“I can’t do this with you. You’re not going to drain me out. This petty, childish bullshit isn’t worth it. I’m here to stay, Carter Travis. I may come and go from time to time, but this is my home, too. It’s not just yours. I’ll write whatever I want to about you. If you don’t want me to write shitty things, don’t be a shitty human being.” I tried to get around him to go up the stairs. Suddenly, the basement felt mighty small and I needed out.

“If we want to write about shitty human beings, let me start up a novel about Brielle fucking Harper!”

I recoiled. It was like he sliced me with a knife, the words cut me open and blood gushed from my wounds. “Be my guest. You won’t be the first person in my life to turn on me and you won’t be the last. I’m done discussing this, or anything, with you.” I pushed past him and he grabbed my arms.

“I’m not done!” he hissed, pulling me in tight and kissing me. The kiss was my punishment, and I should’ve hated him but my body sparked to life and I was putty in his hands.

“I hate you,” I moaned between kisses.

“Good, because I feel the same way.”

“Fuck me.”

“I plan on my dick and your pussy working things out for a long damn time today.”

“Good.”

He hauled me into his arms roughly and carried me upstairs. “Couch or bed?” he demanded.

“Bed,” I whispered, nibbling his ear. I was on fire for him. My panties were soaked, my nipples hard, and I needed him inside me, yesterday.

He carried me the rest of the way upstairs and dropped me on the bed. HIs fingers found the button on my jeans. “You are mine,” he informed me as he jerked my pants and panties off.

“I always have been, dumb ass, you just are being ridiculous, and ohhhhh…” his mouth lowered to my throbbing clit and he sucked me, hard. I would come in seconds if he didn’t stop. The torture was too much.

“What’s that?” he asked, releasing my sensitive nub for a moment.

“Shut up and fuck me,” I ordered.

“That’s one thing we can agree on.” He buried his face back in my pussy and licked me mercilessly. My orgasm took my breath and I arched up off the bed, gripping his shaggy hair in my fists firmly. He sucked me down from the high then muttered against my thigh, “I’d like to keep my hair, thanks.”

“Get on the bed.”

“Excuse me, I thought I was taking you,” Carter snapped.

“It can’t just be what you want all the time.” I reminded him.

“Fine. Do your worst.” He slowly unbuttoned his shirt, and my mouth went dry with each inch of bronzed, muscular skin he revealed. Tossing it to the side, he stripped off his boots and his jeans and underwear went next. His dick stood tall and proud and my pussy clenched involuntarily. I needed him inside me. “I’m not scared,” he smirked as he crawled up on the bed and put both hands behind his head.