Heaven and Hell (35 page)

“But there is nothing that Chris could do for Serena, is there?”

“Nothing,” confirmed Jesus. “God’s decision on this matter is final. We both grieve that Serena made the choice not to walk with the Father, but that was her decision.”

“And now, because Chris loved this woman, he’s in pain. Why did he ever have to marry her? My son would have been happy here if only…,” Jennifer was too upset to continue.

“Jennifer,” Jesus said, “don’t blame this woman for whom Chris has such deep love. Don’t blame her for what has happened to him. You must not harbor resentment in your heart for her, not even now. For I tell you, she is already reaping the terrible reward for her disobedience to the Father. Though she rejected my sacrifice, I feel no ill will toward her, only sorrow for her loss. Remember, I loved you long before you even knew me. If I still love Serena, even now, can you, who were bought with a price, do any less?”

Jennifer lowered her head, ashamed to have even considered the thoughts she had just given voice to. Through Serena’s book, she had been given a glimpse of the suffering of those in Hell. Surely, Serena’s fate was horrible beyond imagining. Now more than ever before, she understood why God, in His wisdom, had veiled the minds of the saints to the suffering of those who had not found the narrow path. “I’m sorry.”

“I know,” said Jesus. “Let us speak no more of it.”

“But in trying to help her, Chris couldn’t get kicked out of Heaven, could he? I mean, could his name be removed from the Book of Life?”

Jesus’ response was unexpected. He stood up and extended His hand to Jennifer. “Sister, grasp my wrist, grasp it firmly.”

Jennifer obeyed, and as she did so, Jesus took her wrist in his hand. His grasp was gentle but firm.

“Now, Jennifer, try to let go.”

Jennifer opened her hand, releasing the wrist of Jesus, yet He did not reciprocate, His grasp remained firm. “You see, you might let go of God, but He will not let go of you. Such is the depth of His love for you and your son. The Father will not allow you to fall from His Kingdom. You love your son very deeply; but I tell you that the Father loves him even more. Do you truly think He would condemn one of His beloved children to outer darkness because that child made a mistake in judgment?”

“I understand now,” Jennifer said, rising to her feet as well.

A smile appeared on the face of Jesus as He released Jennifer’s wrist. “Be at peace. Let this situation be in God’s hands. All things work to the good for those who love God. It is as true here as it was on Earth. Trust Him, Jennifer; place this crisis in His hands.”

Nothing more was said about the trial ahead. There was nothing more to say. Jesus was right; it was all in God’s hands now.

E
XCRUCIATING pain; it had become the center point of her existence, dominating her entire being, as surely as the flaming black sea dominated her world from horizon to horizon. Its cruel currents had swept Serena far from the barren brown cliffs of the shore and into the endless, heaving nightmare beyond. Eventually, those currents had carried her from the land of eternal daylight into the sea of eternal night. Serena remembered her final sunset, as the bloated red orb sank below the horizon never to rise again.

The sky overhead faded, first to a pale gray then to black, until only a narrow band of amber stretched across the lonely horizon, giving evidence to a red sun far beyond. Yet, that bow of light was fading as she was carried deeper into eternal night. Only the flames illuminated her surroundings now. Not that there was anything to see beyond the black boiling ooze, heaving and churning in an endless dance of suffering.

Her once beautiful skin had become a reddish brown hide, covered with boils and sores that erupted and healed in a never-ending cycle of destruction and regeneration, as her body’s incredible healing power fought an eternal battle with the scalding black oil that engulfed her. Beneath her burnt flesh, her blood boiled within her veins, giving rise to its own unique pain, a pain which penetrated to the depths of her being.

The portions of her body above the roiling black liquid fared no better, for they were scorched, and occasionally charred by the terrible flames that swept randomly across its surface. Her long, beautiful hair had been totally burned away; leaving only inflamed and scarred flesh covering her head. She had no eyebrows or eyelashes, for the parts of her body that could be burned away had been.

She thrashed about in crazed pain. There was no respite and no rest, only the continuing torment that ripped her humanity from her, leaving only her base animal instincts. Those instincts told her to do anything to escape, yet escape was impossible. Yes, therein was the source of her escalating desperation, a desperation that would lead inevitably to madness.

How long had she been here? Only an instant compared to the eternity that stretched before her, and that realization alone was driving her toward insanity. If only the heat would increase, consume her utterly, destroying both body and soul. Nothingness would be infinitely preferable to this. But that nothingness would never come, for her existence would stretch into infinity. The human spirit was eternal and, thus, so would be her suffering.

She tried to think of Chris, to dwell on the love that they shared in life, but love had been drained from her. There was no room for love in her heart. It had been replaced by fear, regret, and grief, the emotions which dominated this place. Those emotions seemed like tangible entities. The sulfurous air, the boiling sea, the flames, they were all infused with it, and their abundance penetrated everything, even to the depths of her soul. She couldn’t even picture his face in her mind’s eye. No matter how she tried, her efforts met with failure. His face was hidden beyond her terrible veil of agony. What she wouldn’t give for just a few minutes without pain.

She spun around as her ravaged body rode over a mighty swell. There was nothing to see but the black sea and the orange flames. She was absolutely alone. Was there still light on the horizon behind her? She wasn’t sure.

The sea wasn’t always a realm of solitude and isolation. Occasionally she encountered others, fellow souls being swept along on their eternal journey by the currents. She had learned the hard way to do her best to avoid them, for in their pain-generated madness, they might very well attack her. They were like rabid animals, no, worse. Rabies plagued its victim with its maddening pain for only a matter of days or weeks. The torment of this place was on a wholly different scale.

Ten years, a hundred, a thousand—what could that much pain do to the human soul? It created a being who would lash out at any living creature with frightening ferocity, hoping that in doing so, their pain might in some way be eased. Worse still, she realized that eventually, she would be just like them, a vicious animal with no trace of reason, conscience, or compassion that made her a human being. It was a ghastly thought. Yes, it was best to avoid others here.

Twice Serena had seen a most curious sight, an angel robed in white, traveling on powerful wings high overhead. What were they doing here, in the most unholy of places? She couldn’t say. Would that she could have gone with them, yet they paid no attention to her.

Then there were the dark demons. From time to time, one would cross the sky, borne on black leathery wings, riding the ever-present thermals. They were a kind of patrol, sentinels whose task it was to insure that none cheated their fate. They had been sent here for good reason, for here and there, the waves of the boiling sea crashed upon isolated islands of black volcanic rock. She had seen several of them in the course of her involuntary journey. They were little more than jagged treacherous spires that protruded from the waves; yet to the human souls doomed to this sea of agony, they were a place of sanctuary. If you could swim hard enough through the ooze, time the crashing of the waves upon the rocks just right, the waves might throw you onto the craggy flanks of one of these pillars. If you could get a handhold and climb, you might escape the grip of this dreadful sea, if only for a few minutes.

It would be difficult to accomplish because the swift currents of this sea carried its victims along on an endless voyage. If she missed the opportunity, it would be unlikely that she would have a second chance. Still, it was a hope, the only hope she had of even a momentary escape from the sea.

It could be done, Serena had seen it. Perhaps a month ago, in the fading daylight, she had watched a ragtag man clinging from a craggy rock that rose a dozen feet above the crashing waves. His fingers were dug into holes in the nearly vertical rock face. His refuge held no level ground upon which he could rest, not even a ledge upon which he might sit, yet she had envied him nonetheless. He was free of the terrible hot embrace of the sea, perched above the swirling flames. For a time he had found some measure of relief.

Yet his victory was short lived, for even as she watched, a large black demon swept down upon him. He had barely avoided the demon’s claws by casting himself back into the turbulent fiery sea and hiding in its dark depths. The demon had sought him out for several minutes, eventually being joined by others. They played a dreadful game of cat and mouse with their terrified victim. The pitiful soul would duck beneath the waves to avoid his tormenters, only to pop up somewhere else. Then, he was once more compelled to seek refuge in the merciless depths as the demons made for him again. In the end, they grew weary of the game and went off in search of other sources of amusement.

Serena was catapulted back to the present, as her attention was drawn by a bolt of lightning that illuminated the dark skies before her. There was a storm up ahead, and the current was carrying her toward it. Serena shuddered, for with the storm would come rain. Not a rain of water, but a burning rain of powerful acid and flaming sulfur, driven by hot gale-force winds. It would make the ordeal all the worse.

Again the lightning flashed, just as she was carried across the crest of another wave. She could see the torrential rains mixed with blue fire on the horizon. This one looked particularly bad. But wait, there was something else. Amid the torrential rains ahead, she beheld a shadowy form jutting up from the flaming sea. It was an island, and she was being carried straight toward it. In the absence of the storm, it might have gone unnoticed. Here was her chance, slim as that chance might be. How far away was it? How big was it? She couldn’t tell. She did the only thing she knew to do; she began to swim toward it.

Swimming through this sea was far worse than just floating in it, but she was being driven by desperation. She tried to force the pain into the back of her mind, focus upon the task ahead. Only another prisoner of the sea of fire could begin to understand her motivations. Even if she did make it, which seemed unlikely, her victory would likely be short lived. Even in the dark, a demon would most certainly spot her within minutes; throw her back into the heaving maelstrom, or worse. But she had to do it. She had to get out of this stuff, even if it were only a momentary reprieve.

She focused her attention on the dark silhouette, occasionally illuminated by the distant flashes of lightning. As the minutes passed, she began to realize the true scale of the landmass before her. This was no mere rock jutting up from the depths, but a full blown island, the largest she had seen. If only she could reach it. With all of her strength, she pulled herself through the oily sea, through the cruel flames. Her tired muscles pained her almost as much as the searing sea, yet she refused to give in.

“No!” she gasped, “I won’t give up. I am going to make it. Oh, God in Heaven give me strength; help me to keep going, please God!”

It seemed so strange that a damned soul should call upon the Lord. She had done it so often during the past months, more than all of the years before, when it might have done her some good. Whether God really heard her now, she couldn’t say.

She did her best to judge the distance to the island and the direction of the current. There was so little margin for error. If only she could be free of the pain, she might be able to think clearly, put her full concentration on the problem. These were the worst conditions imaginable.

Slowly, inexorably, the island grew larger, yet even as it did, she began to realize that the current was not carrying her directly toward it, she was drifting to the left. Unless she worked harder, she might well be carried past it, unable to return. She struggled all the more.

The dark island loomed before her. The flashes of lightning had showed only its silhouette from afar, but now that she was closer, she could see the island itself. The flames of the sea illuminated its flanks in an eerie amber glow, adding a third dimension to the landmass before her. The island was large, perhaps a mile across, dominated by a mighty peak that towered above the evil sea. To the left of the peak, the slopes plunged steeply into the fiery surf, but to the right the slopes were far more gentle. That would be the best place to try for. From the looks of it, there was a rocky beach there. She could practically step from the sea and onto dry land, if she could only reach it.

It seemed almost too good to be true; perhaps it was. Though she was fighting as hard as she could, the current was just too strong. The easier slopes couldn’t have been more than a few hundred yards away, yet they might as well have been on the other side of the world. There was no way that she could reach them. Her heart was plunged into despair.