Hidden Alpha [Alpha Mates] (Siren Publishing Ménage Amour) (18 page)

When she snapped at him, she knew she hurt his feelings. She knew she hurt his feeling when she felt his body tense but couldn’t find it in her to care at that moment. She was getting what she wanted. Him hurting. Until that moment, she thought that was what she wanted, but she was starting to have second thoughts. If he had just told her what she was and explained everything to her, they could have figured something out. Instead he had lied to her. She would have to explain to him the error of his ways someday, but now was not the time. Now it was time for him to claim her and save her life. They could work out everything else later.

She turned her head to the side and gentled her voice before saying, “I’m ready, Gavin. Please move. I can’t take it anymore. I need you to claim me.” When he didn’t move right away, she thought maybe she had said something wrong, and he was going to leave her again. Carefully, she looked over her shoulder at him and saw the tears freely flowing down his cheeks, dripping onto his chest. She wasn’t sure what to think of it. “Gavin, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing’s wrong, baby doll. I just...I can’t say how sorry I am for everything. Thank you for giving me a second chance. Even if it is only to save your life for Devlin and Chase.”

She gave him a lopsided smile and sighed before saying, “Gavin, I think we both know that this is more than that. You had to have known how much I loved you before you left. I have never stopped loving you. Even when I met Chase and Devlin, I still loved you. Don’t get me wrong, I love them, too, but the love
we
have goes back a long way. Just give me some time, Gavin. You hurt me, and I don’t know if I can learn to trust you again.” She smirked at him and wiggled her hips. “Now please, can we do this? My body is on fire again. I need my
mate
to claim me.”

Gavin smiled down at her, and she felt the wall around her heart crumble more at the familiar look she had missed so much over the last five years. “Yes, baby doll. But...I know I don’t deserve to ask you this, but can we do this a little different?”

“What do you mean by different?”

“Can you please roll over and let me make love to you properly? I want you to look into my eyes so you can see how sorry I am and how much I love you.”

She wasn’t sure she was ready for him to
love
her, but when he gave her the puppy dog look, with those hazel eyes, she couldn’t resist. She had always loved the authentic shade. They seemed to change color with his moods. She wondered now if it has something to do with him being a wolf shifter. She would have to a start of list of things to ask him, but when he pulled out and nudged her hip so she would turn over, all thoughts of talking went out the window. She rolled over on her back and wrapped her legs around his waist as he plunged deep into her with one thrust. She threw her head back and moaned. Her dream of making love to Gavin was finally coming true, and she knew she would regret it if she didn’t enjoy it. She would only get one first time with someone, and he was trying to make it special for her. Maybe it was a good thing that they were on a time crunch. If not, she may have fought her feelings for him for too long, and he would have gotten tired of waiting and left her again. She had to turn her mind off, or she was going to miss her dream coming true.

She told herself to stop thinking and just feel. It wasn’t working until she looked into Gavin’s eyes. They were dark green at the moment. That was her favorite color on him. Whenever he wore green or they were cuddling on the couch or in bed, his eyes were green. The night he left they were ice blue, even though he was wearing green. She had never figured out the odd color that night. Now she thought that maybe they changed with his mood. She shook her head to clear her thoughts.

“Please, Gavin. Love me.”

She wasn’t sure if she was asking him to make love to her or to just love her, but he seemed to know what she meant. “I have and will always love you, Amalya. You are my life. I am nothing without you.” With that, he leaned down toward her. He was giving her a chance to stop him, but she didn’t want to. She lifted her lips to him and kissed him. The kiss started out gentle, but as soon as she opened for him, he plunged his tongue into her mouth and tasted her. She missed the taste of him. He always tasted good to her, and now she knew why. He was her mate.

While he explored the inside of her mouth, he leisurely started moving his hips, his cock stretching her with every plunge. She could feel every inch of him and knew she would become as addicted to him making love to her as she was to Chase and Devlin. She wrapped her legs tighter around his waist and pulled him into her harder.

“Please, Gavin. Harder, please. I need...you.”

She didn’t have to beg long. He lifted his head and started ramming into her so hard she could feel her whole body moving up the bed. He lifted himself enough to reach a hand between them and run his fingers over her clit. The orgasm she didn’t know was so close engulfed her, and she screamed. Her orgasm continued for what seemed like forever. Before her pleasure turned uncomfortable, he released her clit and leaned down again. Slowing his hips, he softly kissed her lips and whispered, “You come so beautifully, baby doll. I can’t wait to make you do it over and over again.”

She could feel her face heat up and hoped he wouldn’t notice her blushing.
No such luck.
She knew he saw when he grinned and kissed each cheek. Wanting to get his attention off her embarrassment, she tilted her head to the right, granting his access to the left side of her neck where he had already marked her at his mate. She would have to ask him later why he did that if he knew he couldn’t claim her fully. Her thoughts scrambled when he traced his tongue up the column of her neck. She almost came again when he scraped his canines over his mating mark.

He chuckled and asked, “Are you going to come for me again, my sweet mate?”

Who was he kidding?
Of course she was going to come again. She knew the second his teeth punctured her skin she would explode again. Maybe even before that. She wiggled her hips and clenched her pussy, hoping to make him feel as out of control as she did. It must have worked. His strokes that were slow and gentle increased in speed and strength. Soon he was pounding into her. He slid his arms under her arms and wrapped his hands around her shoulders, locking her in place. When she thought he was close, she tilted her head farther to the side and whispered, “Claim me my m...”

She didn’t have to finish the sentence. He struck hard and fast, sinking his teeth into her neck over the mark he had left there over five years ago. She screamed again. This time it was his name that left her lips.

Amalya felt his canines retract and felt him lick the wound on her neck closed before he whispered in her ear, “I love you. Thank you.”

With one final thrust, he lifted his head and actually howled as she felt him empty his seed deep inside her. She could feel his cock pulsing inside her, and it set off another orgasm of her own. When Gavin laid his head down on her chest, she ran her fingers though his hair and kissed the top of his head.

“Don’t ever leave me again. I don’t think I would live through it a second time.”

He kissed her chest between her breasts. “I’m not going anywhere unless you tell me to, my love. I promise.”

“Good. Now help me get to my room and into the shower.”

Gavin stood and pulled his pants on. He wrapped a blanket around her and lifted her into his arms, cradling her like a child. She pointed the direction to her bedroom. He sat her down on her feet and started to get undressed again. As much as she wanted to shower with Gavin and spend time with him, she needed to make sure Chase and Devlin were really okay with what just happened. She also needed time alone with one or both of them to ask them some questions. First and foremost, how were they all mates? And what did that mean about them and Gavin? Would they claim him, too, and he them? She wasn’t sure how Gavin was going to react if they wanted to claim him. He had never said anything against gay or bisexual men, but that didn’t mean he would be open to having a sexual relationship with them. Would Gavin expect to only be intimate with her? Would she have to choose whose bed to sleep in every night, or would she be forced to take turns? Or would Gavin be willing to sleep with them, even if he didn’t have feelings for Chase and Devlin? She knew she was getting ahead of herself, but she didn’t want to have to choose between her mates. She wanted them all to be happy together. It didn’t matter to her if Gavin didn’t want to be intimate with Chase and Devlin. Nothing mattered as long as everyone was happy with whatever solution they came up with.

She stopped him from taking his clothes off. “Gavin, I need a few minutes. Can you please go get either Chase or Devlin? I need to speak to one of them.”

The hurt look on his face made him look like his dog just died, so she added, “It’s not that I don’t want to take a shower with you. I just need to talk to one of them. They are my mates, too, and I need to make sure that they are all right. Please understand. This is a big step. They have been together their whole lives. I have only been with them for two weeks, and this is all new to us. I need to make sure that nothing is going to come between any of us. We all need to make sure we communicate our needs and our problems. My needs right now are to make sure that my other mates are okay. You understand, right? They are your mates, too.”

Gavin nodded and leaned down to kiss her on the tip of her nose. That little gesture was something else that she had missed over the years he was gone.

“Okay, my love. I will go get one of them. Maybe we can shower together next time.”

He left the bathroom as she stepped into the shower, letting the hot water ease some of the soreness she had been experiencing for the last couple of days. As it had after Devlin claimed her, her energy started returning. She stood under the falling water, wondering when her intentions of making Gavin suffer had derailed.

She wanted to kick herself in the ass for letting Gavin know how much he meant to her. She gave him all the power in the world to hurt her again. She just hoped that he didn’t use it against her.

Devlin and Chase had been sitting in the kitchen while the boys ate ice cream. When they realized that Amalya had forgiven Gavin enough to enjoy their time together, Devlin turned the radio on. He didn’t want the boys hearing anything that they were too young to understand. He also wasn’t sure how he was going to react to what was going on. He knew at first Amalya was only doing this to save her own life, so he and Chase wouldn’t be hurt. He wasn’t sure now. Not that he was jealous. He wasn’t.
Really.
He just...he wanted to be in there with them. He knew his reaction to Gavin was the mating bond starting, but he wasn’t sure what they were going to do about it. It had been just him and Chase for so long, and they were still getting used to Amalya being part of their lives. Now they would be adding another male to their family. Another
alpha
male.
Is Gavin even bi?
Or were they expected to share Amalya with him but never touch him? Would he feel the same feelings that Devlin was feeling for him? If so, would he act on them or shut them down? He knew quite a few people, human as well as shifters, who thought that being anything but heterosexual was a sin. Would Gavin be one of those people? Devlin asked himself all of these questions while he watched Chase keep glancing down the hall from where he stood in the middle of the floor where the kitchen met the living room. He patted the stool next to the one he was sitting on and said with the most sincerity he could find, “Come sit with me, my love. They will be fine. This will all work itself out. You will see.”

He could see by the way Chase looked at him that he hadn’t made it sound as convincing as he had planned. He shrugged his shoulders. “It has to be fine. They are mates. And they are
our
mates. When Amalya feels better, we will all sit down and talk. We’ll figure out how all of this is going to work and go from there. There is no sense in worrying about something we cannot change. You will drive yourself crazy if you don’t stop thinking about everything. I can almost smell the smoke from your brain, you’re thinking so hard.”

Well, part of his plan had worked. He got Chase to laugh and come join him in the kitchen. When he sat down, Devlin leaned in and gave him a light kiss on the lips as his slid a bowl of ice cream in front of him. “Here you go. Something sweet for the sweetest wolf I know.”

He watched the color rise in Chase’s cheeks. He always knew how to make his mate blush and took every opportunity. Devlin had been working on Chase’s self-esteem for years now, but Chase still didn’t see his full worth. Because of Gavin, Amalya didn’t think she was worth their love. He briefly wondered what Gavin was like and if he had any self-esteem problems they would have to work through. His mind wandered to his other male, and, as if being called, the other alpha appeared in the doorway.

Gavin looked nervous, and Devlin couldn’t blame him. He still wasn’t sure himself what was going to happen between them all. All of this must have been even more confusing to Gavin. Not only had he returned to find his mate mated to two other wolves, but he was also mated to the same wolves. He wasn’t sure why Gavin thought they weren’t all going to be mates. The only way it worked was if they were all mates.

Devlin watched Gavin stand in the doorway shifting from foot to foot. He wasn’t sure if he wanted to calm the other alpha or make him sweat it out a little while. Obviously, Amalya had forgiven him, and Devlin took her lead. If she could forgive him after all he had put her through, Devlin owed it to him to try and make things work between all of them. He motioned for Gavin to join them and got up to get him a bowl of ice cream.