Hidden Barriers (34 page)

It’s been a few weeks since Sam and I had our moment on the dock at the lake house. Yes, we absolutely have a long way to go before we ever get married. I’ll be the first one to admit that, but when the day comes, I know without any doubt I want it to be her.

We’ve kept our commitment to one another a secret from our families, for now. Sam thought that moment was meant for us and only us, and sharing it too soon may ruin what we have only just started. She’s filled with such joy and laughter when we’re together that we can’t see any reason why we shouldn’t start living our lives together.

We decided just days ago that moving in together made sense, although we felt bad leaving behind the friends who ultimately brought us together. In the end, though, it is going to be the right decision.

We’ve been driving around searching for rental places all day today. I would have bought Sam her dream house if it meant putting a stop to this painful search. I’m just one big fuckin’ ray of sunshine at the moment. If I see one more dilapidated townhouse, I may drive my baby into the nearest telephone pole and call it a day.

I finally decided to take my vintage Chevy out of the garage at my parents’ place. Dad thought I might be sick or lost my marbles when I asked him for the keys this morning. I may have fibbed and said it was going to be nearly eighty degrees today, and since I lived close now, it made taking her out for drives much easier. Yeah, I blatantly lied. It is really another way of putting my past behind me and starting my future.

The minute Sam sat in the passenger seat, pushed off her flip-flops, and hung her feet out the window, I knew any bad memories with my car were gone. She was creating new ones for me. As she continued to sing along to songs from The Band
and other classic rock band tunes cranking through the old speakers, I fell in love with her a little more.

If she still fears Stone’s reappearance, she’s been hiding it well. Nick has said he will do what he can to check any outlets while he is at work, but as of right now, there is no sign of Stone. That alone has allowed an uneasy feeling to settle deep within my stomach, and I feel worse about how protective I’ve become around Sam. I’ve made sure she hasn’t had a moment alone since we got home from the lake house.

Last week, Sam ran inside the house before I could make sure it was clear. When I yelled for her and followed her voice into the bathroom, she flipped her shit on me, probably because she was in the middle of taking a pee. That’s when I knew I needed to let her breathe a little, so I recruited the rest of the crew to make sure until Stone is found someone is around her.

Nick is stopping by later while I help Sam start packing her things to give me some updates on the case. Something tells me I’m not going to like what he has to say.

Sam reaches over to the radio and turns down the Kansas
classic she has been humming along to. She pulls in her feet from the window and pushes her aviator sunglasses onto her head as she turns to face me. “All right, what’s up with you today? You hate all the houses we’ve looked at. You aren’t talking anymore, and even driving around in this freakin’ pimp ass car isn’t making you happy. So, what’s up?”

I keep my eyes on the road as I rest one arm out the car door, and my other hand clutches the steering wheel as my thumb taps nervously. Blowing out a long breath, I try to think of how I should word my thoughts. I pull the car off to the side of the road, stopping next to a few horses from the nearby farm. They buck their heads up and down as the dust from the dirt road startles them from their grazing.

After putting the car into park, I turn to Sam, resting my hand over the back of the passenger seat headrest. “Josh, what’s going on?” she asks with worry displayed on her face.

I pull my hand from the seat to push back the hair that has come loose from her ponytail. “Sam, I want us to start our future together, more than you even know. But, once you move out of the house with the girls, I’m going to worry about you being alone even more than I do now. Until we know for sure where Stone has disappeared to, I need to make sure you’re always safe.” She turns to look out her open window at the horses that slowly stalk along the fence.

Sam opens her door and pushes her feet into her flip-flops before walking over to the fence. I turn to step out of the car, shutting the door behind me. I watch as she silently stares at one of the horses moving cautiously toward her. I rest my forearms on the top of the car, allowing her the time she needs to process whatever it is she’s thinking. The black and white spotted horse stands inches from her now, moving his head up as Sam reaches out to stroke the spot between his eyes with her flattened palm.

“If I let my mind go there again, I will not be able to live my life,” Sam says as she turns around to face me. “If I wake up every day and fear him, he wins, even if he never comes after me again. If that happens, I know everything we’ve worked through will be lost.” My head rests in my palms as I allow her words to sink in. She’s fighting for us to stay together. I’m the one breaking it apart again by not allowing her to live her life. The sound of her sandals flapping against her heels lets me know she’s nearing me. I feel her arms wrap around my waist as she rests her head against my back. “We need to try to not fear what we don’t know, and you cannot break down on me. I need you to be the strong cocky ass I fell in love with. That’s what keeps me smiling everyday because you showed me how not to be afraid.”

I bring a hand down to wrap around hers as I turn around to see her face. “I need to make sure you’re safe. I don’t know how to do this any other way.”

“I need you to try,” Sam says as she kicks at the gravel on the side of the road. Pulling out of my grasp, she walks back to the other side of the car. “I think it’s best if we call it a day. I don’t feel like looking at any more houses today.”

“Sam, don’t be like this. C’mon, you know I’ll do whatever you need me to do for you.”

“That’s just it. I need you to be the Josh I fell in love with, not Officer Page.” She swings open the squeaky car door and then shuts it with intensity behind her. I let my head fall back as I silently scream inside. Once I calm a little, I open the door and sit with added force before slamming it. Sam sits with her arms crossed over her chest, her leg bouncing nervously as she stares straight ahead at nothing. “Take me home, Josh. I love you, but I need some time with just the girls.”

I turn the key and listen to the rumble of the engine. Throwing the car into drive, I make the twenty-minute drive across town to the C-Naughtie house. The entire time Sam says nothing, and with the radio turned off, the silence is doing nothing but tormenting me.

As I pull into her driveway, I notice all the girls’ cars are here, and Nick’s cruiser is parked to the side. I knew he was planning on stopping by; I just didn’t know he would be on duty when he did.

Sam springs from the car as soon as I park and shut off the engine. Throwing open the front door, I follow a good distance behind, shaking my head. How was I wrong in trying to protect her? I know I might have been a little smothering, but maybe she’s been keeping her fear suppressed for too long that she’s using this as her only way of coping.

As I walk into the house and shut the door behind me, I see everyone in the kitchen. Nick stands in his uniform as Lucy looks like she’s about to pounce on him. Kim and Rose are busy making drinks, I think. Kim is rimming martini glasses with sprinkles as Rose pours in some bright pink concoction and finishes them with a cherry.

Nick catches my eye and moves over to where I am standing. The girls all loiter around the martini glasses before I hear them say in unison, “Feel the rhythm. Smell the grime. Move your ass. It’s derby time!” Then, one by one they all start sipping. Sam’s eyes roam over to Nick and me before turning back to the others. I overhear Rose say that she and Kim will be leaving in a few weeks for New York with their all-star team for a race.

Nick pulls a folder from under his arm and hands it to me. “I pulled all of this from the files this morning. I need Sam to confirm that the description inside matches Stone. Apparently, a woman came in after seeing the BOLO on the PD website and said she thought she saw someone that resembled his police photo around town last week.”

Grabbing the folder, I open it and see the face of the man who causes Sam so much turmoil these days. I can’t imagine what the knowledge of him being nearby will do to her.

If she thought I wasn’t giving her space before, this bit of information will end up suffocating her, because I will not leave her side for a minute until Stone is found and put behind bars again.

“Sam,” I say, getting her attention as Nick and I move over to the girls. “I need you to listen to me. Someone
thinks
they saw Stone around the area last week. Nick needs you to read the person’s description and confirm if you think it’s him, okay?” Sam’s eyes stay with mine, but her body begins to quiver.

“I can’t.” She squeezes her eyes shut as I pull her into me.

“Listen to me. I need you to do this. If he’s around, we will find him. Nick and I and the rest of the police department, we’ll find him if it’s him. I won’t let him get to you. You hear me?”

Sam nods as she eyes the closed manila folder on the counter. The rest of the girls move in closer to pull Sam into a group embrace. Sam’s shaky hand reaches out, flipping open the folder in front of her. Stone’s police mug shot is the first thing she sees.

A loud gasp comes from Lucy’s mouth as she stumbles back, hitting the fridge. Her hands cover her mouth as her eyes snap open with terror. Sam looks over her shoulder at Lucy. “Lucy, what’s wrong? What is it?” she asks timidly.

Lucy’s eyes dart around to all of us before pinning on Sam. “Sam…I had no idea…Oh my God,” Lucy stammers out words as though she’s hyperventilating. She continues to mumble as her feet give out beneath her, and she collapses on the floor.

Nick is at her side, instantly checking her out. “Lucy, can you breathe? Lucy? Tell us what’s wrong?”

“That photo… Stone… he was at our derby event weeks ago. He hit on me, and then I let him follow me home. I brought him up to my room, and we…oh my God... I’m going to be sick.” Lucy stands and runs down the hall to the bathroom. Rose and Kim are quick to catch up to her. Sam stands next to me white as a ghost. Nick and I exchange glances, and he understands exactly what this all means.

Sam slowly walks to the living room, muttering to herself before collapsing onto the sofa. Knowing what he needs to report, Nick grabs his cell phone to make a call as he walks out the front door to his cruiser. As I grab my own cell phone from my pocket, I make my way to the sofa. Sitting next to Sam, I pull her body into mine. She immediately rests her head on my lap as she cradles herself in a fetal position. My finger slides over the screen to dial the one person I didn’t want to have to call. I thought I could handle this on my own until about ten minutes ago. Things change when we don’t expect them. The ringing continues through the earpiece, and I hear him pick up on the third one.

“Drew, it’s Josh. We have a problem, and I’m going to need your help.”

I lean against the telephone pole just a short distance away from where I plan on getting my revenge. The single streetlight casts enough light for me to see the time on my watch. It’s 1 A.M. Taking a final drag from my cigarette, I drop it to the pavement and stomp it out with my steel-toed boot.

I’ve been watching closely since that chick let me walk right through the fuckin’ front door almost two months ago. Jesus, if it was any easier, I wouldn’t be standing here right now. But, shit, if that easy lay didn’t just offer me all her roommates’ info on a silver fuckin’ platter. I never even had to ask about Sam. That tight little number opened her mouth as fast as her legs, and I had her begging for more.

It’s too bad I’ll have to use her in my big plan and then kill her, too. Oh, well. She bored me after two fucks anyway. Sam at least was a challenge back in the day, but Lucy, that blonde freak, is into some kinky shit.

Yawn.

I need a chick to put up a fight to get me hard on a regular basis. Dark, empty back alleys are usually where I work best, but this house will have to do. I’ll fuck Lucy once more, but this time, she won’t want it as much as she did before. This time when I tie her up and take her, she’ll know exactly who I am and what I’m going to do to her. Then, I’ll wait for Sam.