Authors: Jae
She'd never told anyone about that time in her life, but
surrounded by darkness, lying next to Amy, she felt safe. "He yelled and
shouted." She flinched as his booming voice echoed through her.
Amy rubbed her arm, anchoring her in the present.
"Sometimes, he shoved me or shook me. When he was
particularly angry, he slapped me across the face."
"Why... why would he do something like that?"
Amy's voice was thick with outrage. "You are his daughter!"
Despite all her skills around the ranch, Amy was still so
innocent in some ways. Her parents' love had spared Amy from the heartache Rika
had been through. "Sometimes it was my own fault," Rika said.
"There were days when I couldn't finish my chores in time or sell enough
bread. Once, I tripped and the whole basket of breads and pastries landed in
the mud, ruined."
"But that's no reason to hit you!" Amy sat up. The
bed trembled under her angry movements, and Amy groaned in pain. "If my
papa hit me every time I did something wrong, I wouldn't have survived my fifth
birthday. One time, I sneaked into the corral at night and forgot to close the
gate. By morning, all our horses were scattered across the valley."
Rika shuddered at the thought of her father's rage if
something like that had happened to her. "What did your father do?"
"He gave me a lariat and told me to catch Grasshopper
while he brought back all the other horses," Amy said.
"Grasshopper?" A chuckle chased away Rika's
sadness. "Let me guess — she was a mare."
Amy grinned. "One that didn't like to be caught. Papa
knew that. He caught the other horses while I was still out there, trying to
get close to Grasshopper. After a while, Papa came and watched. But he didn't
help. He didn't take the lariat away from me. He just sat in the grass for
hours."
"And Grasshopper? Did you ever catch her?" Rika
asked.
"After a while, she got curious to see what Papa was
doing. I think that's why she finally allowed me to catch her. Papa just stood,
dusted off his pants, and the three of us went home." The memory of her
father teaching her a lesson brought a smile to Amy's face.
It all sounded like a fairy tale to Rika. "I wish I had
a father like that."
"I'm sorry," Amy said. "So you became a
mail-order bride to get away from your father?"
"Oh, no, I left home much earlier, as soon as I
could."
"Where did you go?" Amy asked. Clearly, she
couldn't imagine leaving her home and her family.
With a family like hers, I wouldn't want to leave either.
"When the War broke out, I was sixteen and I became a nurse for the
Union army. That's how I met Willem."
"Willem?"
"My late husband."
The bed shook as Amy jerked. "You were married? What
happened?"
Rika hesitated. Was it crazy to trust Amy with that part of
her life? What if she told Phineas and he didn't want to marry a woman who had
already been married once?
"It's all right. You don't have to tell me. I didn't
want to pry," Amy said when Rika kept hesitating.
"You're not prying." Rika had been the one to say
they were friends, and she had already told Amy too much to refuse to answer
now. "It's just not something I'm proud of."
The covers rustled, and then Amy squeezed Rika's hand before
retreating. "Does Phin know?"
"No." Rika hoped Jo hadn't told her future husband
a lot about her family or her life. Jo's family was poor and had left her to
fend for herself, so Jo rarely talked about her past. "And if you don't
mind, I'd prefer to keep it that way for now."
"Of course."
"Thanks." Even though Phineas was Amy's friend and
her loyalty might be to him, Rika sensed that Amy wouldn't violate her trust.
"So your husband, what happened to him?"
The memories seemed as if from a lifetime ago. "Willem
was one of the soldiers in my care. I tended his wounded arm and listened when
he talked about his dreams of what he wanted to do after the War. We both knew
he might not survive the next battle, so when he asked me to marry him before
he was sent back to the battlefields, I said yes."
Amy was silent for long moments. The bed creaked as she
shifted her weight to look at Rika. "Did you love him?"
"He was a good man," Rika said, "and
sometimes, he talked to me in Dutch. It reminded me of my mother and of the
only time in my childhood when I was happy." After her mother had died and
her father had married an English woman, they stopped speaking Dutch at home.
"So what happened to Willem? He didn't come home from
the War?"
Rika bit her lip. "Oh, yes, he did. But he wasn't the
friendly young man he had been... or that I thought he was. The War made him
bitter and distant." She had realized then that she was married to a
stranger. Neither of them knew how to act around the other. "He started to
drink."
"Did he..." Amy stared at Rika in the moonlight.
"Did he hit you too?"
"No. But he often didn't come home for days; he idled
away his time and rarely worked. What little money he earned, he spent on
brandy. One morning, they brought him home dead. He fell off his horse in a
drunken stupor and broke his neck."
Amy sank against her pillow. "I'm sorry."
Rika said nothing. She lay back too and stared at the
ceiling, stunned at herself for telling Amy so much about her life. In the
burning barn and down by the river, she had trusted Amy with her life, and now
that the trust between them was established, it was hard to take it back. Rika
wasn't sure she wanted to take it back. She turned her head to glance at Amy
and found her looking back. "What about you?" Rika asked.
"Me?"
"Did you ever fall in love? Have a beau?" As long
as Rika had been at the ranch, she hadn't seen any man come by to court Amy.
Rika didn't understand it. Why did the men of Baker Prairie have a need for
mail-order brides while no one asked for Amy's hand? With her deep green eyes
and her pretty face, Amy was too beautiful to be overlooked even if she was
different from the young women Rika had known in Boston.
"No," Amy answered. "I never had a beau. I
want nothing short of what my parents have together. I won't settle for less,
and I can't see myself having that with one of the men around here."
The careful answer piqued Rika's interest. Amy had answered
just one of her two questions. "But you've been in love?"
In the silence, an owl hooted in front of the window.
"Amy?" Rika whispered when no answer came.
"You asleep?"
"No, I just... I don't know how to answer your
question. I had... feelings for someone before, but I don't think it was
love."
Rika nodded. She had found out too late that her feelings
for Willem hadn't been love either. "I know what you mean."
"I doubt that." Amy's voice was a low murmur, but
with Rika lying so close, she could still hear.
"Why wouldn't I understand?" Rika asked. "Do
you really think we're so different from each other?"
"You have no idea how different we are."
The words weren't a surprise — Rika had been an outsider,
different and distanced from the other girls, all her life. She wasn't
beautiful or even interesting. People didn't go out of their way to become
close to her.
Still, hearing it from Amy hurt. Rika turned her head
around, away from Amy.
"Hey." A shy hand touched her shoulder. "I
didn't mean it in a bad way. You wouldn't want to be too much like me, believe
me."
"Why would you say that?" Why wouldn't she want to
be like Amy, who was honest, hardworking, and loyal? At first glance, she had
thought Amy's life idyllic and uncomplicated, but now she sensed pain behind
Amy's words. She turned toward Amy and studied the shadowy planes of her face
in the near darkness. "Everything all right with you?"
"Of course. All I meant is that we're different people,
but we can still be friends."
The knots in Rika's gut loosened. "I'd like that."
"All right, then. Friends it is." Amy nodded at
her. Their gazes touched; then Amy rolled around to face the wall. "We
should get some sleep now."
Rika closed her eyes and let the murmurs of Amy's breathing
lull her to sleep.
* * *
Nora jerked open the bunkhouse door. "Where is
he?"
Playing cards fluttered to the floor when Kit and Emmett
tried to hide them.
Nora ignored it. She knew Luke didn't approve of the ranch
hands' gambling, but right now, it wasn't important.
"Who?" Hank rolled off his narrow bunk.
Nora drummed a rapid beat on the door. "Adam, of
course."
A sly grin crept over Hank's weather-beaten face. "In
the pigpen."
"You left him in the pigpen? Alone?"
"No. Miss Callaghan took first watch. I didn't want to
leave her alone with Adam, but she insisted. She has some papers that say she's
a railroad marshal or somethin'." Hank shrugged, clearly not sure what to
make of Frankie.
The door of the bunkhouse fell closed behind Nora. She
gathered her skirts with one hand, lifted the lantern with the other, and
marched toward the pigpen.
When she walked closer, the circle of light fell on Frankie,
who sat on the corral rail and whittled away on a piece of wood.
Luke also did that to while away time or to calm herself.
Nora slid her gaze over Frankie and found more similarities: the strength in
the tanned hands, the confidence of her movements, and the respect in her eyes
when she looked at Nora.
Did Tess fall in love with her because she's a bit
like Luke?
Sometimes, Nora suspected that Tess and Luke had shared more
than friendship, more than their bodies. Not that she could blame Tess if it
was true. She, too, had been helpless to stop herself from falling in love with
Luke.
But then Frankie slid down from the corral rail. While Luke
would have jumped and landed in a wide stance, Frankie climbed down with
light-footed elegance. She had changed back into a pair of pants, but the way she
moved reminded Nora of the dress Frankie wore to supper.
She has some things in common with Luke, but in others,
she's very different.
Nora wondered what Luke made of her.
"You know, you could have let Hank and the other boys
deal with Adam," Nora said. "You must be exhausted after traveling
for so long. You don't have to stand guard in front of a pigpen."
"I don't mind. I'm used to it." A grin tugged at
Frankie's lips. "Well, maybe not to the pigpen being used as a cell, but
I've guarded prisoners many times before."
Nora studied her. Luke and she had thought Luke's disguise
was what enabled them to live their lives the way they wanted. But Frankie did
what she wanted too, without pretending to be a man. "And the men just let
you do that?" Nora asked.
Frankie walked closer. "The trick is not to wait for
permission. After I've already done it, they can protest all they want."
That meant Frankie went off on her own, without any help if
things got out of hand. "And when you investigate a case, you don't take
Tess with you?"
"Not in the beginning. When we first met, I saw Tess
only a few times a year, whenever I got back to Independence. But then we...
grew closer, and just visiting every once in a while wasn't enough."
Nora understood. Being separated from Luke for just two
months left an empty place inside of her that couldn't be filled by focusing on
teaching, working the ranch, or helping her daughters. "So Tess goes
wherever you go?"
"I tried to leave her behind once, telling her I would
return as soon as I caught the arsonist who set fire to a railroad bridge. Tess
would have none of it. She said if it's too dangerous for her, then it's too
dangerous for me." Frankie threw away her piece of wood. "And she's
right. She's pretty good with that little revolver of hers, and she can handle
a rifle as well as I can. She doesn't panic in dangerous situations, so who am
I to tell her to stay behind while I go off risking my life alone?"
"Interesting," Nora murmured, more to herself.
"I never thought of accompanying Luke to Fort Boise. Maybe I should have.
Maybe we have fallen into our roles as husband and wife too quickly, because
that's what people think we are."
Frankie's calm gaze rested on her. "You found a living
arrangement that works for you, but Tess and I both live as women, so we have
to constantly negotiate our roles and can't take anything for granted."
Nora knew she would lie awake tonight, thinking about her
role in life. But for now, she was here and taking care of the ranch was her
responsibility — and that included Adam. The lantern in her fist swung back and
forth as she pointed at the pigpen. "Adam is in there?"
"It has a sturdy bolt, and Hank said the pigs like to
bite."
Nora lifted an eyebrow at her.
Frankie grinned. "All right, all right. We put the pigs
in the paddock before we locked Adam in there."
"Good." Nora gave a decisive nod. "Wouldn't
want to subject the poor animals to such company. That man hit me over the
head, not caring if I lived or died, and he set fire to a barn full of horses.
Is he still tied up?"
"His hands are bound. Why?"
"Because I want to talk to him." Nora knew she
wouldn't be able to sleep before she had faced Adam. Maybe it would help her
understand why he had nearly killed her and the horses and why he was still
lurking about on their land. She laid her hand on the bolt and prepared to
slide it back. "Keep that rifle ready, please, in case he gets any
ideas."
Maybe living with Tess had taught Frankie not to stand in
the way of a determined woman. She nodded and shifted her rifle.
Nora pulled back the bolt and opened the door.
Adam rushed forward, his bound hands raised.
"Nora!" Frankie shouted and cocked her rifle.
"Get back!"