Highland Grace (2 page)

* * *

The Maclean Holding, The Highlands, Scotland 1204

Jesslyn MacCreary sat with her hands tightly
clasped and pressed firmly into her lap as she received the
interrogation by her good friend and protector, Laird Daniel
MacLaurin, chieftain to both the MacLaurin and Maclean clans.

“Who did this to you? I demand to know!” he
shouted and then continued without waiting for an answer, “‘Twas my
cousin, Callum MacGregor, was it not? It had to be.” He turned and
stormed across the room a few paces, running his hand through his
already tousled auburn hair, before turning back to Jesslyn.

“Nay, ‘twas not Callum,” she replied in low
tones.

“Thank Christ for that, since he’s been wed
to the daughter of Laird Gordon these past moons. Who then? One of
my Maclean warriors? The man will wed you and make this babe
lawful, I swear it.”

“It makes no difference who the father is.
And I’m perfectly capable of raising this bairn on my own, you
needn’t worry,” she replied with more confidence than she actually
felt.

“Aye, it matters. It matters a great deal.
The clan elders may insist on banishing you, tho’ my grandmother
and I will not let that come to pass.” Daniel walked over to the
stool across from her and sat down. Leaning forward, he placed his
hands over her clenched fists and said, “Now, tell me who did this
to you, Jesslyn. No more delaying.”

Realizing he’d not relent until she’d given
him the information he was seeking and seeing the worry in his
familiar green eyes, she finally said, “‘Twas one of the traveling
minstrels—a one-time encounter. And there’s no need for you to
worry; I’m resigned to my situation—in fact, I revel in it.” She
rose and stepped toward the hearth. Keeping her back turned to
Daniel, she clasped her hands at her waist and twisted her fingers
together.
Not a complete falsehood
, she told her chiding
conscience. Her gaze dropped to the rapid pulse of her guilty heart
beating in her wrist.
Aye, but not the complete truth,
either,
it answered back.

She felt the weight of his gaze on her as he
said, “Nay, I’ve known you for too many years not to see through
your charade. ’Twas
not
a traveling player, Jesslyn. But I
shall plague you no further about his identity, at least for the
moment.”

She turned back to him with a nod of
relief.

“I’m not surprised to hear that you’re glad
at the prospect of a babe; after all, you’ve craved more bairns for
a long time now. In fact, ‘twas one of the reasons you agreed to
wed me.”

“Aye, well, you’re well-wed to Maryn
now.”

“The threat of a clan war and much needed
profits from shipping saw to that.”

Jesslyn nodded. “Not
such
a hardship,
I trow,” she teased, though her heart wasn’t truly in it.

Daniel smiled and that calmed her. “Nay, not
at all, as Maryn is my one and true mate,” he said.

Taking a deep breath, Jesslyn closed her eyes
and forced herself to tell Daniel the plan she’d been formulating
since suspecting her condition several sennights past. “I think it
best that Alleck and I leave here and go back to the MacLaurin
holding. I can easily say that I’ve been widowed once again,” she
said hopefully. Peeking back over her shoulder, she continued, “You
know that they’ll believe me—my good character is well known to
them.” Embarrassed by the subject, she dipped her head and regarded
her nerveless hands once more, saying softly, “They’d never think
to suspect that the bairn was conceived outside of wedlock. And you
did bring me here with the clear purpose of finding a husband for
me.”

“Aye, but how do you suppose you’ll support
your bairns if you return there? On your ale-making?”

Irritated at the derogatory tone in his
voice, she turned fully to face him again. Placing her hands on her
hips, she said, “Aye, why not? ‘Tis a good profession.”

“Aye, if ‘twere your only choice. But ‘tis
not. What of my vow to your husband as he lay dying on the field of
battle? That I’d take care of the two of you, that I’d see that
Alleck was trained to be a warrior when the time came?” Daniel
shook his head. “Nay, Maryn and I think it best that you and Alleck
move up to the keep and reside with us under our full protection,
at least until the babe is born. And my grandmother is in full
agreement.”

Jesslyn turned back to gaze at the crackling
flames in the hearth as she considered the arrangement. ‘Twas so
like Maryn, with her generous nature, to want to protect them from
censure. Jesslyn was still amazed that she and Daniel’s wife had
become such good friends, especially considering their troubled
beginning. But having the support of Lady Maclean as well, the
grandmother of the babe’s father, left Jesslyn with an even heavier
feeling of guilt for denying that lady her great-grandchild. Could
she live under the same roof as the older woman and continue to
withhold that knowledge? She didn’t know if she could. But she owed
it to her late husband’s memory to do as he wished and keep their
son under Daniel’s guardianship, which, ultimately, forced her
decision. “Aye, that seems a good solution.” Turning back to
Daniel, she continued, “And this, you believe, will bolster your
defense against my banishment?”

“Aye, it will. In fact, your possessions
should be transferred up there forthwith. I shall send several
servants down here to retrieve them as soon as you have them packed
and ready. Since your condition is not yet known to anyone other
than the four of us, we have some time to get you settled before I
take the information to the clan elders.”

“I just wish that I’d had a bit more time
before my situation was discovered,” Jesslyn said.

“You may wish it, but ‘tis glad I am that I
found out now rather than later. At least I have some time to deal
with the clan before your condition is apparent. Just think how
much worse ‘twould have been had one of the other clan members
realized the truth behind your squeamish behavior of late before
Maryn did,” Daniel replied. “Will you at least tell me when you
expect this babe to arrive? And please do not lie to me again.
‘Twill do no good, as I shall figure it out on my own in a few
sennights’ time anyway, if only by the signs you give.”

Seeing the truth in that, Jesslyn gave him
the answer he sought. “I expect the babe around the time of
Bealltainn
.”

Daniel nodded and by the look of surety in
his eye, he was no doubt still believing ‘twas Callum’s bairn she
carried. Thankfully, he made no further queries, simply rose and
walked toward the door. After opening it, he turned back to her,
his lips pressed into a thin line as he gave her a penetrating look
before saying, “You’ll have an hour’s time to get everything packed
and ready to be moved up to the keep. I shall go to Niall’s house
to retrieve Alleck and then I shall tell him that we wanted the two
of you to live there with us. That should suffice until you are
able to explain your condition to him.”

Jesslyn started at the sound of the door
slamming shut. He was still angry, it seemed. Sighing, she walked
toward her bedchamber, her mind swirling with disjointed thoughts.
Thoughts of packing her things and moving to the keep. Thoughts of
the reception she’d receive and the questions she was sure to have
to answer, shrouded in half-truths. Thoughts of her babe. Thoughts
of its father.

She absently felt for the foreign coin that
resided around her neck on a leather thong. ‘Twas the one Bao’s
mother had given him as a bairn, he’d told her. Jesslyn had kept it
hidden under her clothing and cradled between her breasts next to
her heart ever since she’d found it under her pillow the morning he
departed for Perth late last summer. A parting memento from her
unborn babe’s father—tho’ he’d certainly not known of her condition
at the time, as he’d left within mere sennights of their
interlude.

Her eyes blurred with unshed tears. She
gritted her teeth and swallowed past the lump in her throat,
refusing to give in to the weakness. But one fell. And then
another. And in a moment’s time she was across the chamber and
lying face down on her bed, quietly sobbing. A phalanx of emotions
crowded her being. Humiliation, dread, joy, sadness, relief, anger,
remorse, longing; all of them melded together to form a tight ache
in her chest.

Unable to control her emotions, she indulged
them, hoping that in doing so, it would lessen the need for such
outbursts in the future. The thought of breaking down in front of
Lady Maclean mortified her. And she certainly couldn't allow her
son to see her in this condition. That image alone was enough to
dry her tears.

She sat up.

After a moment, she walked to the washstand
and poured water into the basin before dousing her swollen eyes and
heated cheeks with the cool liquid. She grabbed a dry cloth from
the stack that lay next to the bowl and pressed it to her face,
turning as she did so to plan her packing procedure. ‘Twas time to
gather up their belongings, she could defer it no longer.

It didn’t take her long to finish the task,
as they’d brought few things with them when they’d traveled here
from their home on the MacLaurin holding almost seven moons
prior.

Jesslyn opened the door to the cottage and
then turned. With her hand on the handle, she took one last look at
the place she and her son had called home for these past moons,
images flitting through her mind. Of Daniel questioning her
behavior when she’d kissed him in the tower chamber, causing his
new bride to leave him; of Callum playing knucklebones with Alleck;
of Maryn generously offering Jesslyn her friendship and support; of
Bao.... She smiled then, tho’ ‘twas bittersweet. Aye, Bao. Daniel’s
half-brother did so delight that day in her berry tarts.

With a jagged sigh, she turned and walked
out, leaving her past behind as she forced her feet to carry her
toward her future.

* * *

“Remember you when your friend, Coby, back on
the MacLaurin holding, told you his mama was making a babe in her
belly and, once it was finished, he was going to be a brother?”
Jesslyn said to her son as she sat on the edge of the bed next to
his reclining form. She lifted her hand and gently stroked the pale
blond hair off of his forehead.

Alleck’s brows furrowed. “Aye, and then his
blabbin’ wee sister was borned.”

Jesslyn smiled. “I thought you liked Christy.
She certainly seemed to like you.”

Alleck shrugged and rubbed his chin on his
shoulder. “She’s all right. But she don’t know how to keep a
secret. And she can’t play knucklebones good, either.”

“Well, you weren’t very good at the game when
you were a bairn of three summers, either. I’m sure she’s much
better at it, now that she’s older.” She tapped her son’s nose.
“And telling me that you were trying to lower yourself into the
well was
not
blabbing,” she chastened. “She was worried that
you’d get hurt.” Jesslyn leveled a stern look on her son then.
“Which, you most definitely could have done, laddie.”

Alleck’s lower lip extended, but he didn’t
argue, clearly not wanting to get another lecture from her.

Realizing the subject of her discussion had
gone off course, Jesslyn said, “A while back, you told me that you
wished you could have a brother.” She drew in a deep breath and
slowly released it before continuing, “You may get your wish, for
I’m making a babe in my belly now.”

Alleck sat up so quickly he nearly toppled
her off her perch. “Truly?” he said excitedly, bouncing up and
down. He stilled and cocked his head to the side. “But I thought
you could only make a babe if you was wed—that’s what you told
me.”

“Aye, and that is mostly true. But,
sometimes, just sometimes, a lady will make a babe when she is
not
wed,” Jesslyn replied. Due to the babe’s bastardy, it
would need a strong foundation of love and support and she thought
to begin building it now. “‘Tis not very usual, and that’s why we
must feel doubly blessed.”

“I can’t wait to tell Niall I’m going to have
a brother!”

Jesslyn cringed inwardly. Taking both her
son’s hands in her own, she said, “Nay, Alleck, you mustn’t tell
Niall about the babe yet. ‘Tis going to be a secret that only you,
Daniel, Maryn, Grandmother Maclean, and I know. At least for a
while. And I cannot promise you that you’ll get a brother—the babe
may be a lass, we will not know for sure until the birth.”

Alleck’s shoulders slumped. “Aye, Mama.”

“That’s a good lad. Lie back down now and I
shall tell you a tale of a mighty warrior who was given a kingdom
after he slew the horrible dragon that had been rampaging the
countryside.”

Alleck hurriedly lay back down.

Jesslyn began her tale in low, reverent
tones.
“Many years ago, not far from this very keep, there once
lived a great and powerful warrior....”

* * *

“I believe Callum to be the father, tho’
Jesslyn has stubbornly refused to verify my suspicion,” Daniel said
to both his grandmother and his wife late that evening. They’d
agreed to meet in the solar after Jesslyn and Alleck had gone to
their chambers for the night. “I cannot blame her for not wanting
to name him, since, if it were revealed, it might cause Callum
problems with his new bride, not to mention his in-laws.”

“Aye, I suppose I can see the wisdom in
keeping our kinship to the babe a secret,” Lady Maclean said to
Daniel. “But only for a while. Callum deserves to know of his
bairn, and if we wait, say, a year after the babe’s birth, that
should be enough time to lessen the blow to his relationship with
his wife and her family.

“And if the babe is not Callum’s?” Maryn
asked.

Daniel scrubbed his fingers over his stubbled
chin and said, “I’ve thought about this for hours now, and can
think of no other with whom she’d have had the opportunity to
conceive a babe.” He shook his head and shrugged. “Nay, it
must
be my cousin who did the deed.” Struck by a new
thought, he narrowed his eyes at his very pregnant, bronze-haired
wife. “Do
you
suspect someone else?”