Highland Grace (5 page)

Jesslyn sucked in a sharp breath and squeezed
her eyes shut.
Oh, God! He’ll know. He’ll know and he’ll hate
me.

The tense silence that followed pressed down
on her like a slab of granite.

“Al—” Daniel began.

“I’m gonna have a wee brother soon.”

Jesslyn expelled the breath she’d been
holding. When she finally managed to force her eyes open, they were
instantly captured by the shocked and horror-filled eyes of her
babe’s father.

* * *

“Is that so?” Bao said, dread, fascination,
and disgust warring inside him. “And when will your brother arrive,
Alleck?”

“Mama says the babe should be ready by
Bealltainn
.”

Bao’s stomach did a flip.

“But you mustn’t tell anyone about it,
yet.”

Out of the corner of his eye, Bao saw Alleck
nod his head in emphasis. “Mama says so.”

Bao turned his gaze on the lad and took in a
deep breath. “Mayhap, if ‘tis a secret, you weren’t supposed to
tell me either.” Was that his voice? It sounded higher than
normal.

The lad’s eyes widened and he swung his gaze
to his mother. “Is it all right that I told Bao, Mama? You didn’t
tell me I couldn’t tell him ‘bout the babe. And Branwenn
knows.”

Jesslyn turned her gaze to the lad. “Aye,
‘tis all right. We were going to tell him about the babe after the
meal.”

Branwenn leaned into Bao’s side and whispered
in his ear, “She will not tell anyone who the father is.”

Bao nodded once, but said naught. He knew who
the father was. Him.

His grandmother motioned to one of the
servants and requested another stool be placed next to her.
“Alleck, come sit by me. I’m quite curious about this fortress you
and your friend are building.”

While Alleck made his way around the table
and settled himself on the stool, Jesslyn said in a quick whisper,
“I need to speak with you as soon as possible after the meal.
Alone. Can we meet in the wood, at the place we first met?”

He frowned as he studied her a moment before
slowly nodding. “Aye. I asked Branwenn to take a walk with me, but
I shall delay that until later in the day,” he whispered in reply.
His jaw tensed. “And wear a different gown.”

Her brows slammed together in both perplexity
and annoyance, but she nodded. “Aye, all right.”

The remainder of the meal was spent catching
up on events and planning for the coming celebration in a few
sennights’ time. Both Bao and Jesslyn were relieved when the meal
finally ended.

“Alleck, I’ll walk back with you to Niall’s
house. I’d like to speak with his mother a moment,” Jesslyn said as
the others went their separate ways.

Bao watched her leave. When she took her son
by the hand as they strolled from the great hall, he fought hard
against the feelings of wonder and tenderness that threatened to
overtake his other, more logical feelings of disgust and betrayal.
But even with that, there was only one thing for him to do. And he
would do it. No one would ever say that Bao did not know and do the
right thing, no matter how vile the thing he did might be to
him.

He felt Branwenn’s gaze on him as she walked
toward him. “I suppose our walk together must wait until another
time?” she said in a low voice once she’d reached his side.

Bao looked down into his sister’s
all-too-aware eyes and narrowed his own. “You know!” he accused.
“How?”

Color shot up her neck and washed over her
face. She turned her gaze away from him. Then she coughed and
cleared her throat several times, an old ruse, he knew, to stall
for time. “Sorry,” she said hoarsely, “I swallowed wrong.”

“Braaanweennn,” he drawled in the same tone
he’d used on her as a bairn when he knew she was lying to him about
some mischief she’d gotten herself into.

Her shoulders drooped. Wringing her hands,
she walked away from him and stood facing the hearth. “I was there
that day. At the waterfall,” she said in a barely audible voice. “I
saw
everything
.”

Bao strode over to her and grabbed her by her
upper arms, turning her to face him. His voice shook when he said,
“You
watched
us? I can’t even begin to find the words to say
how wrong that was.” He shook her ever so slightly as his grip on
her arms increased. “This is exactly why I insisted that you stay
on here to receive training from my grandmother. No decently raised
young lass would
ever
do that!”

Her eyes filled as her throat worked. Finally
she said in an anguished whisper, “I’m sorry!” before her face
crumpled and the floodgates opened in earnest.

With a jerk, Bao released his grip on her
arms and turned away. Needing to gain control of his anger before
he hurt his sister’s feelings further with more harsh words, he
strode across the room, cupping his hands behind his head. He
stopped and stared at naught, his mind focused on the events of
that fateful day. “You followed me?” he finally asked.

When she didn’t answer, he turned and looked
at her. Her face was a mask of misery, soaked with her salty tears.
She was such a tiny thing; she always had been. Since the moment of
her birth on the four-wheeled cart his father had stolen from some
pilgrims he’d murdered on one of his many freebooting rampages.
Branwenn’s mother had been stolen in a raid by Bao’s father as
well—and then the man had been violently angry when he’d discovered
she was carrying her husband’s babe in her belly. But, somehow, the
woman had survived his father’s beatings and kept her babe inside
of her. But when she’d delivered Branwenn into this world, she’d
taken her last breath. Jamison Maclean had been intent on dumping
the babe on the side of the road, but Bao had convinced him to
allow him to keep her—for a price. That had been the night he’d
agreed to work the venereal trade for his father. And it hadn’t
been many hours past that time that he had been initiated into the
darkest side of human bondage.

With a mental shake, Bao shrugged away those
dismal memories and focused once more on his sister. He’d kept her
innocent. Innocent of that side of his life, and certainly
physically innocent. He’d wanted a better life for her, and he’d
made sure she’d had a clean and stable home, as well as plenty of
food and clothing. But, being raised as she was near the court, and
having a brother who was gone much of the time on the king’s
campaigns, had allowed her to develop her already independent
nature to a level that had been troublesome, to say the least, much
of the time he’d raised her. And was this latest mischief so
unforgivable? Nay, ‘twas not. Especially since he must admit his
own culpability in her behavior.

He walked over to her and took her in his
arms, holding her and stroking her silky hair. “Do you know what
your first word was? ‘Twas my name. Well, not
exactly
my
name, but quite close,” he said, reminiscing in the age-old way
he’d used all her life to comfort her.

She nodded beneath his palm. “I called you
‘Gow’. I remember,” she said wistfully.

Bao smiled and kissed her forehead. “Nay, you
can’t possibly remember. You were too young.”

“Well, it seems like a memory since you’ve
told me of it so oft,” she replied.

Bao hugged her more tightly and let out a
loud sigh. “I’m sorry,” he finally said. “I shouldn’t have spoken
so harshly to you. I was just shocked, but I’m calmer now.”

She relaxed further into his embrace. “I know
I shouldn’t have stayed and watched, but I was just so curious. Why
is it so awful for a lass to know how ‘tis done before she is
expected to
do
it the night she’s wed?” She pulled back and
looked up at him, ire at the injustice of society’s rules written
on her countenance. “Lads are
encouraged
to learn how ‘tis
done, ‘tis so unfair!”

Bao’s lips came together in a grim line as he
pressed his finger and thumb against his eyelids. After a moment,
he shook his head. “I know not.” He looked into his sister’s
upturned face once more and continued, “‘Tis just the way things
are—and always have been, as far as I know.” He shrugged.
“Well-bred, unwed lasses must remain virtuous and ignorant of those
things.” Placing his hands on her shoulders, he said gravely, “I’m
sure it has quite a bit to do with keeping the lass from finding
herself in the same condition Jesslyn is in right now.”

She bowed her head and nodded. “Aye, I
suppose you are right.” She stepped away and sat on one of the
stools next to the hearth. “What are you going to do? Will you wed
her?”

“Aye.”

Branwenn squealed with glee. Bounding to her
feet once more, she flew to him and threw her arms around him
again. “I cannot believe it! You swore you’d never wed!” she said,
her cheek pressed tightly against his chest.

Bao chuckled and scrubbed his knuckles across
the crown of her head, knocking her filet even further askew.
“Fate, it seems, has made that vow one I will have to break.”

She slapped at his hand and leapt out of his
reach. “Then you’ll be staying on here?” she asked as she righted
her hair ornament.

“Aye, so it seems. But first, I must obtain
the mother’s agreement.”

“She’ll say aye—she obviously likes
you—otherwise, she wouldn’t have”—she fluttered her hand a few
times—“you know, with you.”

Aye, he knew. ‘Twas that thing, however, that
he
would
forget. “I suppose I should be off now to speak
with her.” He turned and strode toward the doorway, but swung back
to Branwenn before he departed. “I truly am sorry for treating you
like a bairn in front of the others earlier. ‘Twill not happen
again. And I still want to spend some time with you later—I want to
hear how you have truly been getting on here.”

She nodded. “I’d like that as well. Mayhap,
after supper this eve?”

“Aye, after supper,” he replied. “I missed
you.”

Her eyes misted again and she blinked. “I
missed you too. Now, go find the mother of your babe and set a date
to wed.”

* * *

Jesslyn pulled the fur-lined mantle tighter
around her arms and shoulders as she paced in front of the opening
to the shallow cave where she and Bao had first met—the setting of
their last private talk, as well, before he’d left last summer. The
vines, that had once been so full of leaves, serving to cloak the
entry, were now dry brown stems—a somewhat sinister version of
their former selves, or so it seemed to her. Thankfully, the snow
flurries had stopped some time earlier, but there was still a thin
layer of frost on the ground, and it weighted down the pine and
juniper branches as well.

Where was Bao? She’d been waiting here for
what seemed an half-hour. Mayhap, he’d changed his mind. After all,
his reaction to the news of the babe had been distress and alarm.
Exactly what she’d expected after the cool reception she’d received
from him. Mayhap, he was afraid she would confirm that he’d
fathered the babe and he would feel honor-bound to wed her.

But he had naught to fear, for she had no
intention of wedding him under these circumstances. Nay, he’d made
it more than plain last summer that he desired an unfettered life.
And with his distant manner today, this course seemed even more
imperative. Besides, she had little doubt that he’d resent her for
forcing him into an unwanted union, and a life filled with anger
and bitterness was not the life she would have for her babe, her
lad, or herself.

Deciding it would be foolish for her to wait
for him any longer, she turned to leave. She hadn’t walked more
than two paces when the sound of a horse whinnying brought her up
short. Her gaze riveted on Bao as he walked with masculine grace
over the snow and ice-covered forest floor toward her, leading his
stallion by the reins.

“I hope you haven’t been here long,” he said,
his tone rigid, when he was close enough for her to hear him. “It
took more time than I’d expected to delay the walk I’d planned with
my sister.” His breath formed puffs of gray misty fog as he spoke,
his movements stiff as he tethered his horse to the trunk of a
nearby pine. When he’d completed the task, he turned toward her and
his eyes swept her violently trembling form. “‘Tis bitter cold out
here, I’d best make a fire before you become ill.” All his words
were right, but his voice remained steely.

“My thanks. I should have made one myself,
but I wasn’t aware of the cold until just now.” She heard her own
overly cheerful tone and berated herself.
Why do you care if he
likes or hates you? You’ll not be seeing much of him after
today.

An awkward silence ensued as she watched him
build a fire near the opening to the cave before pulling back the
bare stems of the vines and bringing the two stools made from
portions of pine trunks forward.

Hating the silence, she asked, “I’ve often
wondered: How did you manage to make those stools and the table
while you dwelled in the forest? Did you actually travel with such
cumbrous tools?”

Bao looked toward her. “Nay, we brought only
a few satchels filled with the minimum for our needs—and my
weapons, of course.” He shrugged and shook his head. “The stools
and table were here when I found the cave. I know not from where
they came.”

“Hmm,” she replied with a nod.

“Come, sit by the fire.” Bao unclasped the
circular gold pin at his shoulder. “Take my mantel,” he said,
shrugging one shoulder out of the heavy brown covering.

“Nay, the fire will be sufficient to warm
me.” She settled on a stool and leaned forward with her palms
raised toward the heat of the flames.

He refastened the pin and crossed his arms
over his chest, his look once more brooding and tense. It made
Jesslyn glad that she could hide most of her visage within her own
mantel’s fur-lined hood.

“We’ll wed, of course,” he stated.