His Brother's Wife (19 page)

“Yes.” Grace said,
interrupting him mid-sentence.

He lifted his head to look
at her. “Yes what?"

Grace blinked. "Yes, I'll
marry you."

Rafe sat motionless and
stared down at her. "That's nice to know but Jesse won't stand for
it. The kid already hates me. Besides, truth is, I don't want to
get married.”

"But you just said if I
married anyone, it would be you."

He stared at her, not
bothering to respond. Silence hung in the air until Grace thought
she could touch it. She sat up, moved away from him enough so she
could think clearly, and tried to get her muddled thoughts in order
while toying with the seam of her skirt. So many questions
whispered inside her head and her heart begged her too ask him any
one of them. She couldn't bring herself to do it.

Her body still tingled
deliciously, tiny zaps of residual pleasure surging through her
veins and she didn't understand how he could he bring her such
ecstasy if he didn't want her always. He'd asked for nothing in
return. Denied himself pleasure but gave no indication as to why.
The pieces fell into place slowly but when they formed a clear
picture in her mind, the realization hit so hard, it nearly stole
her breath.

He didn't want her the way
she wanted him. He just wanted to bed her. That was all. She was
good enough to warm his bed but not good enough to marry. Oh, and
he wasn't going to let anyone else do it either.

She bit back the
staggering disappointment and folded her hands into her lap before
staring straight ahead. "I didn't get the money Mrs. Jenkins was
going to pay me for my dresses. I need to go back into town and get
it."

Rafe said nothing. Grace
could feel his gaze on her and as much as she wanted to look over
at him, she didn't dare. He picked up the reins and got the mule
moving again without a word.

When they were on the main
road heading back into town, she chanced a glance at him. He turned
to look at her the exact same moment. Their eyes met for only a
second, but it was long enough for Grace to know he'd just been
brutally honest with her. Regardless of how much he seemed to want
her, he'd never marry her.

She couldn't explain the
gut-wrenching pain that realization caused. As much as she wanted
the ornery man, she knew now he'd never have her. Oh, he may want
to bed her, but he didn't want her forever, and that was a bitter
truth she'd have to learn to live with.

* * * *

After returning to town to
collect her money from Mrs. Jenkins, they made their way back to
the ranch. It was well past noon and Grace set a quick meal on the
table for them. Surprisingly, no one said a word as they ate and
the silence was eerie.

The morning’s events were
still fresh in her mind. The kisses Rafe had given her and the
pleasure of his hand on her flesh caused her stomach to clench in
memory. Her cheeks felt hot just thinking about it. Her heart hurt
knowing he didn't want her enough to marry her.

She stared down at her
plate, trying to ignore Rafe and Jesse. The man she wanted and the
boy who thought she belonged to him.

How had it come to this?
She’d come out west to be married, to start a family and have a
little adventure while doing it. All she’d accomplished so far was
the adventure. At the rate things were moving, she’d never have the
family she wanted and if Jesse wouldn't give up the notion of her
marrying him, she would never be a bride.

Jesse fidgeted in his seat
and Grace raised her gaze to him. He was staring at his plate, fork
moving in small circles around his food. He looked troubled by
something. Her pulse leaped. Did he know what happened in town?
Under the copse of trees?

Flicking a nervous glance
at Rafe was a mistake. The look in his eyes told her he was
remembering it, too. She ignored him and returned her attention to
Jesse and cleared her throat. “Is something wrong,
Jesse?”

He lifted startled eyes to
her. “No. Why?”

She stared at him for a
few moments before shaking her head. “No reason. You just look
distracted, is all.”

“Oh.” He sighed and lifted
one shoulder in a half-shrug. “Just thinking about
stuff.”

“I see.” Grace lifted the
small towel she used as a napkin and dotted at her mouth. “What
sort of stuff?”

Jesse threw a quick glance at Rafe and Grace felt her heart
stutter and skip a beat.
Did
he know? She
fidgeted in her seat.

When he didn't answer, she
cleared her throat and said, “I met some new people in town today.”
Her voice quivered as she spoke and she hoped she didn’t look as
nervous as she felt. When Jesse glanced up at her, she pasted on a
smile and lifted her water cup, taking a sip. “Holden Avery and his
daughter, Alexandra.”

Jesse snorted a laugh.
“Better not call her that to her face. Alex hates being reminded
she’s a girl.”

Grace smiled back. “Oh, so
you know her then?”

Lifting his fork, he went
back to eating. “Yeah. She’s a menace. Thinks she’s a
boy.”

“I got the impression she
does.”

“Its her pa’s fault. He
let’s her do what she wants. Well, he did until he married the
schoolmarm, Ms. Montgomery.”

At the mention of Alex’s
“pa”, Grace glanced at Rafe. He was staring at her, a look of
curiosity in his gaze. She ignored him and turned back to Jesse.
“Did you and Alex attend school together?”

Jesse nodded his head and
sighed. “Yeah.”

That sigh sounded so
forlorn, Grace couldn’t let it go. She’d been meaning to have this
conversation for days now. Stealing another glance at Rafe, she
straightened her spine. “While we’re on the subject of school,” she
said, “Why don’t you attend?”

Time seemed suspended for
long minutes as no one moved or spoke. Grace watched as Jesse tried
not to look in Rafe’s direction. When he refused to speak, she
shifted in her seat to break the silence. “I would think a young
man of your age would want to learn all he could. Why, I don’t
think there’s a young man in all of Boston that doesn’t attend
school of some sort. Most even venture to a University.”

He didn’t say anything for
long moments, just pushed his food around on his plate. When he
looked up, she could see defiance blazing in his eyes. “Yeah, well,
most of them don’t have a whole ranch to take care of either.
They’re mostly just spoiled rich kids who don’t have anything
better to do with their time. This ain't Boston. Life works
different out here.”

That it does, Grace
thought. Silence cloaked the room again. The only sounds to be
heard were that of silverware on their plates.

When the meal was over and
she rose to start clearing away the dishes, she knew she couldn’t
let the subject drop there. “I’m sure whatever chores you have here
could wait until your schooling was over for the day. You aren’t
busy from sun up to sun down. Or at least you haven’t been from
what I’ve seen.”

He glanced at her before
looking over at Rafe. The two brothers stared at one another, not a
word passing, until Rafe stood and said, “Doesn’t matter to me what
you do, Jesse, as long as you do something. Either go back to
school or pull your fair share of work around here and I don’t mean
the half-ass job you feel like doing. You do what I say needs done
with no complaints. Winter’s coming and I don’t have time to fool
around with you anymore. Make a decision and stick to
it.”

Rafe left then, making his
way to the barn. Jesse sat at the table, staring at the empty
dishes. When Grace started clearing them away, he looked up at her.
“Don’t you think a man should be at home working instead of in some
classroom?”

She smiled and stacked the
remaining plates. “I think a man should do what’s right for his
family.”

He stared at her for long
moments , then nodded his head. “Then I should stay here and
work.”

Grace shrugged her
shoulder. “If that’s what you think is best.” She carried the
dishes to the sink. “Of course, most men have enough schooling to
get them by. Educated men can read, write and do their figures. It
wouldn’t do for someone to take advantage of you just because you
were too ignorant to know any better.” She glanced at him over her
shoulder. He was staring off into the other room. “Can you do your
figures well enough to sell your herd without being
cheated?”

He turned to look at her,
his brows lowering in concentration. “Probably.”

She gave him a pointed
look. “Probably will leave you very hungry come winter. Knowing
makes the difference between fair dealings and being known as a man
everyone can cheat.”

He didn’t reply. He helped
her clear the rest of the dishes before going outside. She watched
him through the window as he made his way to the barn.

She wasn’t sure what he’d
decided to do but maybe now he’d at least know he could return to
school if he chose to do so. Rafe had made it clear Jesse was free
to do as he pleased and Grace would bet money Jesse would return to
school. It was obvious, regardless of his claims to be a man, he
wasn’t ready for the responsibilities of one.

Jesse helped out very
little around the farm from what she’d seen. His heart just wasn’t
in it. He was a child in her eyes and children needed more than
work from sun up to sun down. They needed time to play, to be
around others their own age. It’s what Jesse needed. He’d been
filling his pa’s shoes for too long now. It was time to relinquish
his control and let Rafe do the worrying for a change.

The moment she thought of
Rafe, he walked out of the barn. Grace stilled, watching him out
the window and wondered what to do where he was
concerned.

He'd said he wanted her
under that copse of trees, moments after showing her only a
fraction of the pleasure she was sure he was capable of providing.
She'd be lying if she said she didn't want more.

She hadn't been able to
think of much else since they left the shelter of those trees but
Rafe had made it very clear that nothing more would happen. He
wanted her but marrying her was out of the question.

He glanced toward the
house and stopped, staring into the window at her. Her heart
skipped a beat when he smiled. Regardless of how surly and
pig-headed he seemed to be at times, Grace knew one thing for
certain.

She was falling hopelessly
in love with him which meant she needed to find a husband and
quick.

Chapter
Eighteen

Monday morning, Jesse came
to breakfast dressed in clothes Grace knew he wouldn’t work in. His
hair was brushed, his boots wiped clean and if she wasn’t mistaken,
he smelled of some spicy shaving tonic.

She glanced at him as he
sat down to eat. He didn’t look at her or Rafe. He ate without
saying a word until his plate was clean, then he cleared his throat
and slid a glance in Rafe's direction. “Think I’ll head into town
today.”

Grace eyed him over the
rim of her coffee mug.

“How long are you going to
be gone?” Rafe asked.

Jesse fidgeted in his
seat. “All day, I’d suspect. That is if Mrs. Avery will let me come
back to class.”

A long minute of silence
made Grace’s ears ring for the want of some noise. Rafe finally
broke it by sliding back away from the table. “You need to feed the
horses before you go and make sure the cow is milked.” He stood
then, placed his empty dish in the sink and left.

Jesse watched him go
before turning back to face her. “He didn’t seem mad.”

The statement shocked her.
“Why would he be mad?”

He shrugged. “I don’t
know. He’s always harping about me doing the chores and fixing this
or that. Just figured if I went back to school, he’d be ornery as a
bull.”

Grace stood and gathered
the plates. “Well, I think he just expected you to help out since
you were here. I’m sure he’d love nothing more than spend his
evenings holed up in his room doing whatever he chose to do,
too.”