Holy mother of…
He didn’t want to come straight away. It would have been so easy, but he managed to hold back, enjoying the rise and fall as he moved above her. He crushed her mouth against his as she moaned and groaned. Her fingertips bit into his skin with their nails and all the time his orgasm built up, rising and rising.
Lula writhed beneath him, gasping for air, pulling him towards her, pulling him in deeper, her eyes closed. Her breathing grew faster. Shorter. Then she was crying out, arcing up into his body as he rode her through it.
He moved faster. Harder. He ground himself into her and exploded into a satisfying molten puddle above her as she gasped beneath him. Collapsing,
his lips against the skin of her neck, he kissed her one last time, holding on to her, feeling the rise and fall of her chest. Both of them were just breathing, soaking in the moment.
It would have been so easy just to lie there for a while longer. But now that his mind was working clearly again he thought only about getting her to bed. He scooped her up, smiling as she laughed, and made his way up the stairs, kicking open the main bedroom door, shivering slightly at the cold and hurrying them both into bed.
Laughing, they pulled the bedcovers over themselves and snuggled up close, warming each other with their body heat.
Olly held her body against him, kissing her nose, her face, her neck, inhaling her scent once again. It would be so easy for him to take her once again, but he knew there were no more condoms—and he ought to show at least a modicum of self-control.
He felt her remove the condom and groaned at her touch, knowing he could have no more. Lying in her arms, he fell asleep—only to wake in the early hours feeling guilty.
It was still dark. Olly blinked and turned to see the bedside clock, its digital numerals glowing red in the early hours.
Just gone two o’clock
.
His head sank back onto the pillow and he
looked at Lula, sleeping peacefully and contentedly beside him.
She was stretched out like a cat, the duvet covering one shoulder, the other bare almost to her breast. He eyed the gentle up-swell of her skin in the dark and remembered how he’d taken her pink nipples in his mouth. Feeling guilty about what he’d done, he pulled the duvet over her shoulder to cover her.
I should never have slept with her. It’s Lula, for goodness’ sake! My colleague! And she was feeling down. I should never have taken advantage. What does that say about me? What if this changes things between us and makes it awkward?
He’d always thought of himself as an upstanding man. A man who would never take advantage of a woman for his own pleasure. But wasn’t that what he’d done with Lula? This whole baby business, the search for her own mother, the Ruby episode—it had all affected her. Made her think about her own situation. It had hit home.
And what did I do?
No clear thinking, that was for sure.
Feeling gutted by his actions, Olly sat up, swinging his legs out of bed. The air was cooler outside of the duvet and all his clothes were still downstairs. Lula hadn’t stirred, but he didn’t feel he could stay in her bed—not feeling like this—so
he got up and padded downstairs, slipping on his clothes as he found them and then building up the fire once again.
He could hear noises, and turned to see Nefertiti and Cleo looking at him through the bars of their cage, their noses twitching. ‘I guess you saw all of that earlier?’ he muttered quietly, wondering why on earth he was talking to two rats. ‘I admit it—I’m not proud of myself. No matter how lovely your owner is.’
He stood by the cage in two minds. Should he stay? Or go? If he stayed there’d be that awkward morning-after conversation and he didn’t think he could bear to go through that. Even if
she
didn’t feel awkward, he certainly would. But if he left what would she think of him?
I could leave her a note.
He grabbed some paper and a pen from his grandmother’s bureau and scribbled something quickly to imply that he’d got beeped on his pager and would see her later. It seemed the lesser of the two evils, and even though it was a lie he hoped that as it was a white lie it wouldn’t hurt her and make her think that he’d abandoned her, too.
There was no way he wanted her to think that. He didn’t want to hurt Lula. She was special. She meant something to him. But he thought it was important that they had a proper talk about what happened last night. And the immediate morning
after—right before they both had to go to work—wouldn’t be the right time.
Pulling on his jacket, he quietly slipped from the cottage, closing the door without making a sound. Standing in the snow outside, he looked up at the bedroom window, imagining himself back beneath the duvet with her.
I wouldn’t be able to keep my hands off her!
He wanted her so much! But he also wanted the situation to be right. For her not to be grieving over her mother. For her not to be feeling lost because Ruby had her happy ending and she did not. He didn’t want to take advantage of her again.
I hope she doesn’t think I used her. I didn’t. I wasn’t.
Olly sloped away, his feet crunching through the top layer of snow that had begun to freeze overnight.
* * *
Lula woke to birdsong. For a long time she just lay there without opening her eyes, feeling content and enjoying the warmth of her bed, remembering the events of the night before. She blinked slowly, thinking she could turn to Olly and hold him before they both had to get up for work.
He wasn’t there.
She sat up and looked about the room. No sign of him. But then she remembered they’d stripped each other of their clothes downstairs—perhaps
he was down there, making breakfast? She couldn’t smell any food. She couldn’t hear any sounds.
Was he even there?
He has to be. He wouldn’t just disappear in the night, would he?
She got out of her warm bed and slipped on her robe, tying it tightly at the waist before padding downstairs.
‘Olly?’
There was no one in the lounge. And no answer to her call.
But there was a note with her name on, propped up on the mantelpiece. Her heart felt heavy as she went over to it, wondering what it might say. Flipping open the paper, she quickly scanned the words and sagged with relief. He’d been paged! Called away in the night to a patient!
She held the note to her chest and beamed. Last night had been amazing! Beautiful and passionate and just what she’d needed. And Olly had been perfect. He’d tasted tantalising. The feel of his strong, broad masculine form encircling her and entering her had made her nerve endings sing like choristers praising God on high with the most beautiful voices.
His very touch had been magical. She’d felt
everything
. Tingled at every caress, whether with his fingertips or his tongue. She’d almost wanted
to consume him. She’d never have guessed it could have been that way with him. Dear Dr Oliver James.
Just thinking about him made her want him again!
But I have to be careful. I’m not meant to be starting something here. I’m here for my mother. That’s all. What happened with Olly was fun, but that’s all it can be.
She slipped the note into her pocket and went into the kitchen to start breakfast. Anubis sat in his cage, awaiting the sacrifice of some food. She opened the tank’s top and dropped in some insects. She kept her hand there, thinking about touching him. Touching that large, plump, hairy body.
Her stomach squirmed, but she knew she had to force herself to try.
She reached down slowly, her breaths long and steady as her nerves shot into overdrive and her flight instinct kicked in. She would have to be gentle. Tarantulas could be damaged by rough handling.
Her fingers were about an inch away and she was just about to touch him…but he moved. Lightning fast she whipped her hand out of the tank, breathing heavily.
Close. So close!
But not yet. Maybe later she’d try again.
The clock in the kitchen told her she had twenty minutes before she needed to be at work. She headed upstairs for a shower.
* * *
Lula strode into the surgery, said good morning to the receptionists, and headed off into her room. She switched on the computer system and then went to the staff room to make a cup of coffee.
Whilst she was there Helen, the practice manager, came in, bearing packets of biscuits.
‘Oh, they look nice.’
Helen smiled. ‘Can’t beat a chocolate digestive, I always say.’
‘Absolutely. Do you know you can get some with pieces of stem ginger in, too?’
‘Ginger’s good for you, isn’t it?’ Helen smirked. ‘Might have to get them, then.’
Lula nodded and laughed. ‘For medical reasons, yes!’ She stirred her tea. ‘Do we know what the call-out was last night?’
Helen paused. ‘I think it was Mr Levinson. He lives on Old School Road. Chest pains—but it turned out to be indigestion, I think, nothing major.’
She nodded, understanding. ‘What time did Olly get called out to him? It must have been in the early hours?’
Helen frowned. ‘Olly wasn’t on call last night. It was Patrick who went out to the patient.’
‘Oh.’ Had she misunderstood? Had she read the note wrong? No. Surely not. Olly had been quite clear that he’d been called out to a patient. So why had he written that? Had he
lied
? Had he felt bad about last night and not been able to face her?
Why?
They were both adults. They both knew what they’d done. She knew he was a sensitive soul, but surely he hadn’t had second thoughts and run out on her in the middle of the night?
Lula felt as if she’d been kicked in the guts. But not wanting to let her sadness and disappointment show, especially in front of Helen, she forced a smile and went back to her room.
If Olly didn’t want to face her then she’d happily give him all the space he needed.
* * *
Olly sat in his room, writing up his notes for the last patient he’d seen, but his mind wasn’t really on his task. Lula would be here by now. Just down the corridor from him. He could feel her presence, even separated as they were by a few unfeeling walls. She’d not come in to see him—not even to just pop her head round the door and say good morning.
What was going through her mind?
Was she angry with him? No, that couldn’t be it. She thought he’d got called out to a patient—there
was no reason for her to be angry with him. Perhaps she’d got up late and rushed in, not wanting to be late for work, and just hadn’t had the time yet to say hello?
What if she’d not seen his note? That would be awful. She’d think he’d run out on her…
I could go and say hello.
I don’t want her to think I’m hiding.
In fact it would be better if I did. Act normal.
He closed the patient’s file and headed down the corridor, pausing outside her surgery room. Her name plate practically had an accusing stare and, swallowing down his guilt, he rapped on the door briefly and then opened it.
His beautiful Lula sat behind her desk, her rainbow hair hanging down over her face as she wrote a note, but she looked up at the sound of her door.
‘Oh—hi, Olly.’
She didn’t seem angry, or mad—or anything, to be honest. He smiled broadly and launched himself further into his lie from last night. ‘Sorry I had to leave so quickly last night…’
‘Right…that’s okay. Sometimes it happens when you’re on call.’
Good. She’d got his note. ‘I didn’t want you to think I’d just left.’
‘I didn’t.’
‘I…er…had a great time last night and…erm…’
He stood awkwardly in the doorway, not knowing the best way to finish his sentence. ‘I want you to know that it meant a great deal to me, that…erm…that it wasn’t just a—’ He didn’t want to say
one-night stand
. He didn’t want to cheapen their experience by saying the words out loud.
‘It’s fine, Olly. Really. We both wanted it. We’re both adults. But it was what it was. Just sex. Nothing more. It doesn’t have to affect our work, does it?’
Just sex?
Just?
That hadn’t been
just
sex.
‘No. Course not. I just wanted to make sure you’re okay, that’s all. We work together. I don’t want it to be awkward, or for there to be an atmosphere.’
Lula beamed him a smile that could have lit a thousand illuminations. ‘Of course. Is there anything else?’
How could she be so
normal
? Other women he’d met and had slept with—not that there’d been a lot—had always wanted more commitment from him. Sex had equalled furthering their relationship. Being
in
a relationship, for one thing. Wanting to make sure that he wanted to see them again. That he would be hanging around. That they would continue to go out and be a ‘couple’.
But not Lula. She seemed rather blasé about it and he was thrown.
However, he wasn’t going to push it. If she wanted that distance between them then he would give it to her. After all, he was the one who had got up in the middle of the early hours of the morning. He was the one who had made up a lie because he’d felt guilty about what he’d done.
I put the surgery and my patients at risk by sleeping with Lula. What if it had caused problems? Where would we have been then? We’d have had to find another locum.
Olly knew he was lying to himself. This wasn’t about the surgery. Or the patients. He felt
guilty
. He’d slept with Lula when she’d been feeling vulnerable and now that she was acting as if the sex didn’t matter he was protecting himself by telling himself that
she
was the one acting strangely.
It’s all my fault.
She was the most beautiful, strange, exotic creature he’d ever met! Last night had been amazing. The caress of her hands on his skin had been mind-blowing. The way her mouth had moved over his body, the way she’d kissed him… It had been like nothing he’d ever experienced before!
I’d love to feel that way again
.