His Pretend Girl (5 page)

We finally made it to the bedroom, and I took delight in undressing him. I took off his T-shirt first, so I could admire the dark, tribal tattoo on his shoulder, and the firm chest, dusted with hair. He was lean and toned, his skin a pale gold, and without his clothes, he was beautiful. We fell into bed together, a tangle of limbs, fingers everywhere, seeking and exploring.

Our lovemaking was just as slow, and every bit as intense. We clung together, our gazes locked, lips meeting and parting again. I came hard, Ben not far behind me, and we lay there, spent.

Much later, wrapped around each other, we were sticky and hot, but neither of us was willing to leave the bed just yet. I draped myself over his chest. From here, I could finger his tattoo, or trail my fingers across his flat stomach. He made the perfect pillow. I never wanted to move.

Ben pressed a series of gentle kisses along my hairline, and traced a pattern on my back with his fingertips. His touch soothing and intimate, he made me feel alive in a way I’d never known before. His voice was sleepy when he spoke. “How long will you be away?”

I didn’t want to think about leaving him, or to contemplate what awaited me at home. “Two weeks. I’m back on the fourth of January, but not at work until the sixth. Jetlag always cripples me.”

“It’s a long way to go for just two weeks. Big family Christmas?”

“There’s a christening I have to go back for. My step-sister wants me to be one of the godparents.”

Ben continued to stroke me. “I always think of that old mafia movie, when people talk about godfathers. Are you a secret mafia Don, Dorothy?”

“It’d be useful sometimes. You know, to just waste people if they became a pain the ass. Don’t you think?” I tried to push the conversation away into safer waters, anything to avoid thinking about the ceremony, but Ben didn’t take the hint.

“You never talk about your sister.”

“Step-sister.” It was an automatic response. We looked so alike, people usually jumped to that assumption, at least until they knew us better. I’d hoped to finally step out of Melanie’s shadow when I came to New Zealand, but after so many years of my standing in the background, it was now the place I felt most comfortable. Having to take an active part in the christening ceremony would be bad enough, but having to share the limelight with my ex, trawled new depths.

Ben opened his mouth to speak again, but I didn’t want to talk any more. I silenced him with a kiss.

****

I awoke to a strange noise. Snoring. With care not to disturb him, I rolled over and gazed at Ben. Sprawled in my bed, and lying in a broad shaft of sunlight, taking up far more room than anyone had a right to, he looked as relaxed as a kitten. Those long, dark eyelashes were enviable, and I could have watched him, entranced, for hours, but the noise had to stop. It sounded like somebody sawing wood.

Maybe it was due to his lying on his back? I tickled his side with my fingertips, and smiled when he shivered. I did it again, and this time he grunted, then rolled over to wrap his arms around me. The awful noise stopped immediately. He appeared to still be asleep, and his chest rose and fell with long regular breaths. I placed my hand over his heart, and his arms tightened, gathering me closer.

“Mmff, wassa time?”
His sleep-roughened voice mumbled next to my ear, the words merging.

I wriggled so I could reach his hand, to lift it up and look at his watch. “It’s nearly six.”

“Six?” His eyes cracked half open. “In the morning?”

“Well, yes.” I giggled at his impassioned groan. “Are you not a morning person?”

His eyes drifted shut again. “This chick kept me up all night. She was insatiable. Wouldn’t let me sleep.” He peeked up at me, a mischievous grin on his face. “Oh wait, it was you.”

He was adorable. Waking up next to him could have been awkward this first time, but
he was playing with me. Making me smile.

I ran a finger down his nose, noting a bump near the top. “Have you ever broken your nose?”

Ben’s eyes opened wide. “That’s amazing. How did you know?”

“You snore.”

“Do not.” He sounded outraged, but he was smiling. “I busted it playing rugby a couple years back.”

“Why don’t you get it fixed?”

He yawned and covered his mouth with his hand. “I’m not a fan of surgery.”

“That’s why you wear glasses rather than have your vision corrected?”

“Mm huh.” Ben yawned again and flexed his hips, his hard-on bumping against my belly. “Roll over.” I complied, and he spooned against my back, one hand curled protectively around my breast. “You don’t have to be anywhere today, do you?”

“No.” My heart fluttered at the idea of spending the day with him.

“That’s okay then.” He dropped his chin onto my shoulder. “Seeing as you’re not here for Christmas, there’s somewhere I want to take you. Later.”

We emerged into the brilliant sunshine of mid-morning, and climbed into Ben’s car. My hangover had been washed away on a tide of plenty of water, sleep, and lots of sex. I’d be lucky to walk straight. Ben couldn’t keep his hands off me. Even the act of fastening my safety restraint was an excuse for him to steal a kiss. He cupped my face in both hands, and brushed his thumbs over my cheeks while he teased me with his lips. Everything he did, every little gesture, told me how much he cared for me. How blind I’d been. Why had I never noticed him like this before? My heart threatened to melt.

He pulled back and ran an unsteady hand through his hair. “Do you mind if we call at my parents’ place first? I just need to drop something off, and then we’ll go out.”

I couldn’t refuse. And besides, I’d just wait in the car. It wasn’t as though he was going to introduce me or anything. I soothed the nervous flutter at the idea of meeting his parents, and enjoyed the scenery instead. They lived in a quiet northern suburb of the city, one I hadn’t visited before. “It won’t take long.” Ben lifted my hand and pressed a kiss to it as he drove. “My dad’s garage doors jammed yesterday, and he couldn’t get his van out. The circuits had needed replacing for ages, and I planned to do it during the holidays, but…yeah. The doors had other ideas.”

I thought back to what I knew of his parents. “Your dad’s a builder?”

“Yep. And all his gear was in the van, which was stuck in the garage.”

He still held my hand, and I squeezed his fingers. “That’s where you went yesterday. Why you didn’t stay?”

“Yeah. I’m sorry. I couldn’t leave him struggling.”

“It’s okay. I don’t mind.” I didn’t. Ben was the kind of guy who rescued people, and that was one of the things I loved about him.
Whoa
. Where had that thought come from? Ben chattered on about the faulty circuits, and how he’d had to do a temporary fix, but he’d been able to pick up some connectors and wanted to check they were the right size. I sat and stared at the houses and the trees, and didn’t see any of it.

I couldn’t be in love with Ben. We’d slept together once. Had one real date. I’d been with Scott for nearly two years, and hadn’t felt anything like this. My head spun.

“We’re here.” Ben kissed my hand again, and I dragged my attention back to the here and now. The house was a large, pink-washed clapboard, with a wide strip of lush green grass at the front. It looked inviting and homey, especially with the old fashioned yellow roses that climbed lazily up to the roof. “Come on.” He flashed me a smile. “My mum’s looking forward to meeting you.”

What
? I gazed at him, lost for words. “Your mum?” I managed.

“Well, yeah.” He gave me a
duh
look. “She asked if I planned to bring you for the Christmas barbecue.”

I shrank into the car seat. “Why would she do that?”

He sighed and scrubbed his face. “Because she knows I’m crazy about you, Dorothy. Have been for ages. She’s my
mum
. It’s hard to keep secrets from her.” I mustn’t have looked convinced, because he leaned across and clasped his hands around my face, before resting his forehead against mine. “I know,” he murmured. “It’s new for both of us. We won’t stay long.”

With Ben so close, holding me so tenderly, it was hard to remember why I felt spooked. This was nothing like the situation with Scott. “Okay,” I whispered. “Will there be an inquisition?”

His answer was drowned out by a girlish squeal from outside, an enormous dog leaping up at the car door, and a face peeping in through the window. “Ben.” The girl drew out his name, before glancing over her shoulder. “Ben’s here.” Her yell was loud even inside the car.

My lover rolled his eyes, his lips twitching. “No inquisition from my mum, but I can’t make any promises about Kylie. My little sister is, uh, excitable.”

His sister was pretty. She was pre-teen, with the same dark hair as Ben, although hers sprang out from her head in a riot of curls and braids. She had the same generous smile too, when she leapt forward to pull open my car door and take my hand.

“You must be Dorothy. I’m Kylie, and this”—she grabbed at the hound currently trying to barge past her and into the car—“is Archimedes.”

“Kylie, let her get out of the car, please.” Ben gave me a lop-sided smile. “Sorry,” he murmured. “This won’t take long.”

Moments later, Kylie led me into a long, sun-bathed kitchen, her arm tucked through mine. “Mum’s in here, but my other brothers are out. Are you sure you can’t come for Christmas dinner?” In the short walk from the car she’d already told me how nobody liked Ben’s previous girlfriend (too fussy), how Archimedes was really Ben’s dog (found as an abandoned puppy on a garbage dump), and how the latest vampire movie was the best one ever. I also learned her favorite singer, the names of her three best friends at school, and how she wanted to be a journalist when she grew up.

I was reeling from information overload, when I came face to face with their mother, an older version of Kylie.

“You must be Dorothy. Sit down. Let me get you a drink.” She guided me to a chair at the scrubbed wooden table, and then shooed Kylie away. “Go get Archie some water.” Her lips curved upward. “You look a little shell-shocked. Kylie has that effect on people, but she adores Ben, and thinks the sun shines out of his butt.”

I managed a smile. “I think he’s pretty cool, too.”

“Oh,
good
.” Her grin extended. “I know you can’t stay long today—Ben said you had to go out somewhere—but maybe when you get back from your holiday you’ll come round for dinner?” She pressed a chilled glass into my hand, and gestured toward a couple of jugs on the table. “Lemonade? It’s my gran’s recipe and quite delicious, if a little tart. Or there’s mixed berry. That’s sweeter.”

Kylie rejoined us now, the dog at her heels. “What’s it like in Emerald City?” She perched on the edge of a chair, her gaze intent on me. “I’ve never been. Amanda says it’s the coolest city on the planet.” Before I could answer, she tossed out another question. “Are you just going back for a holiday? Why did you want to come and live
here
?”

I poured myself some of the lemon cordial, while I sought a simple answer.
I ran away from the man I should have been in love with?
No, that wasn’t for public consumption. “I’m going back to see my step-sister’s baby being christened, and to spend Christmas with my family, and then I’m coming back here.” Taking a sip of the deliciously sour drink bought me another few seconds. “This is lovely, thank you.” I smiled at Ben’s mom. “I grew up in Emerald City, so I guess it’s my home. It’s big, and noisy, and crowded, compared to here. I like the quiet.”

“What’s your step-sister like? Is she as pretty as you?”

I almost choked on my drink at Kylie’s innocent question. “I’m not pretty. And Melanie is beautiful. Very beautiful.” People were always disappointed in me, when they realized I was nothing like her.

“I disagree.” Ben stepped up behind me and placed his hands on my shoulders. “You’re gorgeous.”

My cheeks burned, and I tried to hide my delighted smile. “She’s a model. Everything about her is perfect.” Her bubbly personality was something I’d envied forever. She could charm a room full of strangers, and have them eating out of her hand, while I still struggled to introduce myself to one person.

Double-dating with her had been a particular nightmare. I’d spent too many evenings making up a foursome with her and her date, and a friend of his. Her dates’ friends were always keen to meet Melanie’s sister, but then would spend the entire time making excuses to leave. That was why it’d been so easy with Scott. He was as socially challenged as me.

Ben’s mom tried to persuade us to stay for lunch, and I’m sure Kylie had a hundred more questions for me, but Ben was firm. We already had plans, he said. We left with a bottle of the lemon drink and a slab of fruitcake in an old-fashioned tin, and Ben held my hand tightly, as we strolled back to his car.

“It’s selfish of me,” he murmured, “but I want you to myself for the rest of the day.”

The Next Day

I pressed a finger to my kiss-swollen lips and tried to hold onto the memory of Ben loving me. It would have to sustain me for the next two weeks. I’d only been in the air for an hour, and I missed him already. Badly.

The steward paused as he walked past, no doubt puzzled by my beaming smile. When I thought of Ben, I felt happy inside. Not even the prospect of seeing Scott was enough to dampen it.

Snuggling into my pashmina, I closed my eyes against the bright sunshine of late morning and tried to doze off. Ben had taken me to the airport and waited until the last possible minute, before we had to separate. Our parting kiss had been hard, hungry, and tinged with desperation. If it hadn’t been for the damned christening, I would have cancelled my trip and stayed home with him. While I could avoid many things, though, I couldn’t miss this.

Think of Ben instead
.

That was easy.

True to his word, he’d spent the whole day with me. We’d picnicked at the top of a massive hill, looking down onto the sweeping coastline so far below. It’d felt as though we were at the top of the world. He’d given me a pretty necklace as an early Christmas present. I touched it now. The sliver of gleaming paua shell hung on a fine length of knotted cord around my throat, another reminder of my lover. I’d been embarrassed, because I was unable to give him a present back, but he just grinned and told me I’d already given him the best gift ever.

He sat on the grass, squinting up at me. A dimple flashed in his cheek, when he smiled, and his eyes crinkled in the corners. He’d looked boyish and irresistible. If I could capture one image and hang onto it, maybe it’d be that one? Or later, after dinner in an intimate French restaurant, when we’d made love on the sofa in my living room.

I disembarked to the freezing chill of early morning in Emerald City, and tugged my quilted jacket around me as I made my way through the busy airport terminal. I’d already worked out the time difference, and knew it to be just after midnight in New Zealand. Ben would most likely be in bed. I tapped out a quick text message, while I waited for my bags to roll off the luggage transporter.

Hey. I’m here, and it’s cold. I miss the sunshine already, but I miss you more.

D xx

Melanie had assured me she’d collect me from the airport, to save having to wait for the Mag-Line. I’d brought gifts for everyone, and the prospect of struggling with large bags on public transport was not appealing.

I’d just retrieved my luggage and loaded it onto a trolley, when two things happened at once. My phone rang with Ben’s ringtone, and a familiar voice spoke at my side. “I’ll get those.”

Scott
. Of all the people who could come and pick me up, Melanie had to send Scott. My stomach cramped, and for a second I thought I was going to be sick, right there in the airport concourse, in front of all the other travelers and staff. My phone trilled again, but I couldn’t answer it. The breath jammed in my lungs so tight, I saw spots before my eyes.

“Dorothy?” He cocked his head to one side and frowned, as though I were a rogue piece of code that had appeared on his screen. A puzzle. Not his would-be-fiancée that had broken his heart and left him in pieces.

Not fair
, I wanted to wail. I wasn’t ready to see him. I’d planned to catch up with everyone first, ease myself back into Emerald City life, and then behave normally when we met up at the christening. Instead, I stood speechless and hyperventilating, and completely unprepared.

“Are you going to answer that?”
Huh
? “Your phone?”

Ben’s ringtone trilled again, but coherent speech was still a long way off. I stared at Scott. He looked exactly the same as when I’d last seen him. The corn colored hair still sprang from his head untamed, and his eyes were as sparkling green as ever. With his athletic physique, he could have passed for a California surfer.

“Greg’s waiting in the car outside, and Mel’s preparing a welcome home breakfast.” He frowned again. “Your phone is getting annoying.”

Ben
. He’d be getting worried. I lifted my phone to my ear and managed to squeak a greeting.

“Hey.” His warm, sleepy voice filled my head. “Thanks for letting me know. Did you have a good flight?”

“Um, yes. Thanks.” Scott continued to scrutinize me, and my cheeks burned some more under his gaze. “I have to go. Talk to you later.” It was horribly rude of me, but I terminated the call and shoved the phone into my pocket. I’d apologize when I called him back.

“Got it.” Scott snapped his fingers. “You cut your hair. That’s why you look different.”

“Yes.” I had to say something now, before we had someone I knew as an audience. “Why are you here, Scott?”

“To give you a ride home.” At last he dropped his gaze to the floor. “And to, uh, apologize.”

I felt like Alice, falling into the rabbit hole. This wasn’t what I expected. “Apologize?” I squeaked again.

“Yeah.” Those piercing green eyes locked into mine. “I don’t blame you for running away. I put you in a horrible position, and you were too polite to say no. Greg told me what an ass I was. I mean, what kind of idiot proposes to his girlfriend at his brother’s wedding reception? It was dumb, and I’m sorry.”

Never mind a rabbit hole. This was an alternate dimension. Maybe I was still asleep? I dug deep. “I shouldn’t have run away. I’m sorry too.”

This drew a tentative smile, his face relaxing. “You’re looking good, Dorothy. New Zealand agreed with you.”

I sucked a breath into lungs that had forgotten how to work. “Thanks.” Relief made me light headed, the words now tripping off my tongue. “You don’t look so bad yourself.”

Scott took control of the luggage trolley and pointed it toward the exit, while I fell in beside him.

“You’re coming back soon though, aren’t you? Now the team leader position has opened up, Greg figured you’d be taking it.”

Wait
. “What?” Another rabbit hole. “What team leader role?”

“Ah, maybe I shouldn’t have said anything.” He flashed me an uncomfortable smile, and continued to guide the trolley through the crowds. “I’ll let Greg explain.” The insurance industry was tightly knit, with everyone knowing everybody else’s business, and Greg also worked for C&H.

There was something else I had to say before we reached the car, and I reached out to tug on Scott’s sleeve. “I never meant to hurt you.” It had strange echoes of Ben apologizing to me after the party.

He paused, a dozen emotions flying across his face. “It’s all water under the bridge now,” he said eventually. “Let’s go find Greg. Melanie can’t wait to see you.”

I trailed after him, my head spinning. If I could face Scott, having breakfast with Melanie should be easy.