Honor Reclaimed (All About Honor) (21 page)

Before he could begin to delve into
the questions there was a hesitant knock at the door from the adjoining
chamber.
 
John was not sure he
wanted to answer the knock, but maybe it was just as well to get it over with
all at once.
 
He crossed over to
the door and opened it to find, as he expected, Drew awaiting admittance.

“I have tired giving you some time
to calm down, but I wanted to inquire about our patient.
 
I see she is doing much better
today.”
 
He crossed across the room
and taking her hand in his he gallantly bent over it and brought it to his
lips.
 
“Madame, I can not tell you
how glad I am to see you well on the way to recovery.
 
You had me worried for a while.”

“Get your hands off of her,
now.”
 
John growled.

“I see I did not wait long
enough.
 
I just wanted to check on
Eirian before I left.
 
I think it
is time for me to return home.
 
I’ve already been away too long.”
 
Andrew’s heart was breaking as he tried to keep it light.
 
This trip had been a disaster; he had
lost his best friend and the woman he loved.
 
He had betrayed them both without even meaning to.

“Do you think you are really going
to get off that light?
 
You are not
leaving here until I know what happened here; all of it,” John sounded
menacing.

“John, I already told you Eirian was
true to you.
 
Do you really need to
know anything else?”
 
Drew tried
one last time to side step the issue.

“You, sir, are a lair.”
 
John got perverse pleasure from seeing
Drew jerk as though he had been physically attacked.

“If you say so, now, if you will
please excuse me.”
 
Drew was still
trying to avoid a fight; a
fight which he was now positive
was coming.

“You are not leaving here without
telling me what happened, and do not try to lie to me again, I have
proof.”
 
With that John held out
Eirian torn gown.

“John, it was not her fault.
 
Please do not blame her.
 
I forced myself on her.
 
I think the gown speaks for
itself.
 
What she would not
willingly give, I took.”
 
Drew
pleaded on her behalf.

Eirian had not understood the depth
of his devotion to her until that moment when he knowingly put the final nail
in the coffin of his friendship to protect her.
 
She started to speak up, but the pleading look in Drew’s
eyes silenced her.

“She was so sick she probably does
not even remember.
 
I did not mean
for what happened to happen.
 
She
was shaking with cold fever I climbed in bed to warm her, but I cannot deny
that I was the one on fire.
 
One
thing led to another and I made love to her.
 
She did not even realize that it was not you.
 
I was pouring out my love for her and
she was calling your name and crying out for you.
 
I did not set out to betray you, but my emotions overwhelmed
me.
 
All I can do is to say that I
am sorry, so terribly sorry, and to remove myself from your lives.
 
I cannot undo what happened.
 
I wish I could.
 
I will always love you Eirian.
 
Does anybody else see the irony in the
whole situation?
 
I have only loved
two women in my life.
 
The first
was forcibly taken from me, and the second never belonged to me.”

“No, I can not allow you to do
this.
 
John, he is fabricating a
story in some warped sense of need to protect me.
 
That is not the way it happened.”
 
Eirian had tears streaming down her face.

“No, please Eirian, I do not think I
want to know.”
 
John moaned.

“Please hear me out love.
 
It was Drew who was delirious with
fever.
 
I was tending him.
 
He was delirious and he did not know
what he was doing.
 
He grabbed me
and pulled me into bed with him.
 
At first I thought he was teasing, but then I realized he was caught in
some kind of a dream state.
 
He was
not fully conscious.
 
That is when
I started to get scared.
 
He
started touching me.
 
I begged him
to stop but he was beyond reach.
 
He didn’t really hurt me, but he was so strong I could not get away from
him. My gown got ripped in the struggle.
 
The next morning he awakened and it was obvious he had no memory of the
incident.”

“God’s teeth, that’s a lie.
 
Do not believe for a minute that he did
not know what he was doing.
 
He has
wanted you since he met you.”
 
Turning on Andrew he said, “What I don’t understand is if you were going
to lie why you would take the full blame in stead of trying to deny it?” John
spat out.

“Because I did not remember what
happened.
 
I
knew something had happened because I found her torn gown on the floor next to
my bed, and then when I was taking care of her while she was sick I saw the
bruises on her thighs and waist, and then there were the scratches on my
chest.
 
There was no doubt what had
happened, but I had no memory of the act.
 
It just seemed like one of the thousands of dreams I have had.
 
She never betrayed you John, and I did
not knowingly betray you, just as I told you when you first got here.”
 
Drew was resigned to the fact that
their friendship was over and that he had lost the woman he loved.

“John, I am going to leave and will
not interfere in your marriage again, but I need to ask your permission to
speak with Eirian in private for just a few minutes.
 
Would you grant me that please?”
 
Drew asked solemnly.

John just stared at him for a few
seconds and then nodded his consent, “I expect you to keep your hands off of
her.”

 
John left the room reluctantly.
 
Drew reached out to take Eirian’s hand, but dropped it
immediately remembering his promise to John to keep his hands off her. “Eirian
there is just one thing that I ask of you.
 
If there is a child born from that night, I want to have a
place in its life.
 
I will not
interfere while the child is small, but if it is a boy, I want him sent to me
when he is ten years old, if it is a girl, by thirteen.
 
By then you will have instilled your
values on it and shaped its character.
 
I just want to have a chance to know my child.”

“Oh God, I had not even thought that
far ahead.
 
What will I do if there
is a child?” she was obviously distressed.
 
“How could you ask that of me?
 
How could you think to take it away from me? You could not
be that cruel.”

“Yes I could.
 
I am giving you up, but if there is a
child, it will be half mine.
 
I
deserve to know it.
 
If you do not
agree, then I will take you to court.
 
I do not think any of us wants that.”
 
He hated to be cruel, but he felt that he was sacrificing
enough by leaving Eirian and England behind.
 
“You know that you will always be welcome to come with our
child.
 
My heart will always be open
to you and you will always have me to turn to if you are in need.”
 
He wanted so badly to take her in his
arms just one more time, but he turned on his heel and walked out of her life
forever.

John found her crumpled in a heap
still crying.
 
“John, hold me
please.
 
I am so sorry I hurt you.”

John knelt beside her and took her
in his arms.
 
“Do you love
him?”
 
John held his breathe for
her answer.

“I do love him, but I am not in love
with him.
 
I did hurt him and I am
so terribly sorry.
 
Will you make
love to me right now?”
 
She
pleaded.

“No sweetheart.
 
I will not be a substitute for another man.
 
When I do make love to you again I want
to know you are thinking of me and not Andrew.”
 
He replied.

“I promise you I will not be
thinking of him, I just need you to hold me.”
 
She countered.

“I will be glad to hold you, but I
will not make love to you until we are sure you are not carrying Andrew’s
child.
 
Any child conceived this
month will be his since I was out of the country and we have not been together
for the over a month.”
 
He was
adamant.

Chapter 8

John insisted on her resting for two
more days before they resumed their journey to Severn Manor.
 
Eirian was anxious to arrive so that
she could check on Aislinn.
 
Her
sister in-law was never sick and if Galen felt it necessary to send for her it
must be serious.
 
She knew that
they must be worried about her as well.
 
When John showed up expecting to find her there and they had not heard
from her, it must have added to their own worries.

When they finally arrived, they were
relieved to find Aislinn on the mend.
 
“Eirian, we were so worried about you.
 
Where have you been dear?”

“Oh, do not worry about me.
 
I will tell you about it later.
 
I am just so glad that you are doing
better.
 
What was the matter with
you?
 
You must have been terribly
ill for Galen to send for me.”
 
Eirian changed the subject as quickly as possible.

“It was feared for a time that I was
coming down with Smallpox.
 
As it
turns out it was only Chicken Pox.
 
I never had it as a child, and because of that, I was gravely ill for a
time.
 
I am just too old to have
had a childhood illness I guess.
 
I
am so much better now, although I still have pain and swelling in my joints if
I get over tired.
 
I will have to
take it easy for a while.
 
I am so
glad you are here to help me pass the time.
 
Now you must tell me where you have been the last two
weeks.
 
Poor John, he was totally
distraught when he found that you were not waiting here for him.
 
You would have thought that he was
afraid you had left the country.
 
He should have known you were safe if you where with Sir Andrew.
 
Where is Drew anyhow?”

“When John arrived to act as my
escort he excused himself and headed back to London.
 
He really needs to get back to his estate in Virginia.
 
He says he has been away for far too
long.”
 
Eirian explained.

“Where were you?
 
What delayed you for so long?”
 
Aislinn could tell something was wrong
and that she was not getting the full story.

“Our second day out Drew awakened
with a head ache.
 
It got
progressively worse as the day went on.
 
He began having chills about noon, and by the time we found an inn to
stop at, he was virtually unconscious.
 
I nursed him for five days.
 
He was delirious and quite a handful I must say.
 
When he finally awakened, he was so
weak that we were going to wait two or three days before continuing, but as it
turned out I came down with it on the second day.
 
It was Drew’s turn to nurse me.
 
John arrived about the time that I was beginning to
recover.
 
I am so happy that he did
not get sick as well.”
 
Eirian’s
answered seemed a little rehearsed to Aislinn, but she would not challenge her
on it.
 
If she wanted to talk about
it, Eirian knew that she could always come to her.
 
Aislinn had a very strong feeling that there was more to the
story than was being told and she suspected it was directly related to
Drew.
 
She had seen the love sick
look Drew got in his eyes whenever he looked at Eirian.
 
She had not seen any sign to indicate
that Eirian reciprocated those feelings, but a lovesick man could be a heady
aphrodisiac.
 
She hoped that Eirian
had not allowed herself to drawn into an illicit love affair.
 
All she could do was to be there for
her if she needed her.