Hope Over Fear (Over #1) (7 page)

“Oh, I didn’t notice Celia and Adam back there. I should have introduced you … oh well, I’m sure you’ll meet them soon enough.”

I smiled tightly at Caroline. “I’m sure I will. Thanks so much for this opportunity Caroline. I’m looking forward to working with you.”

“Me, too! Then I’ll see you tomorrow morning.” Caroline hesitates for a moment, and then lets out a small sigh. “You know, Sara, we are all works in progress.”

“What do you mean?” I question, feeling confused by her comment.

“We are all learning about ourselves and changing every day. Don’t ever feel like you have to apologize for taking time to figure it out. When we stop evolving and improving, that’s when life is over. We are all works in progress,” Caroline repeats, shrugging.

What a wonderful concept and a refreshing way to approach life. It’s comforting to imagine constantly progressing, making changes to become better versions of ourselves. It makes getting over the hurdle of my guilt and insecurity feel much more attainable.

“Maybe you’re right … I hope you’re right. Thanks for the opportunity, Caroline. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Dog Days Are Over” by Florence & the Machine

WITH A POSITIVE attitude and a vanilla latte, I stroll into
New Horizons Outreach Center early the next morning. I’m psyched to start a new chapter in my career, so much so that I’ve seemed to beat most of the staff in getting here.

“Hello? Anybody here?”

“Sara, is that you? My goodness, girl, you must have gotten up before the sun today.” Caroline rounds the corner with a surprised look on her face. Her hair is tied into a messy bun with a paintbrush shoved through it to keep it in place. She seems to have gotten an early start on painting her overalls. She’s already spattered with just about any color you can imagine.

“You can say that again. I even went for a run before coming here today. I’m ready to jump right in.”

“Well, this works out perfectly. After you left yesterday, I made an appointment with a possible adoption client and another appointment with a current adoption client. I’ll just have you meet with both of them today, if that’s all right with you.”

Caroline’s confidence in me is a boost to my self-esteem, and I feel up for the challenge. “I’d love to meet with them. Do you have a few minutes to get me up to speed on the current client?”

“Of course. Actually, I’ll go through their paperwork with you, and then I’ll be out of pocket for the rest of the morning. I’m in charge of an off-site art project today. Other staff members should be arriving shortly, though. You shouldn’t be alone for very long.”

After a briefing on the client, Caroline takes off in a hurry, leaving me alone in the clinic. It isn’t long before I hear someone in the lobby, and walk up to find a beautiful girl with a tiny, round belly. I estimate that she’s probably about twenty weeks along in her pregnancy. Her face is framed with gorgeous brown ringlets, and she’s staring at me with petrified chocolate brown eyes, her delicate hands fidgeting nervously on top of her rounded belly.

“Hi there, you must be Abigail. I’m Sara, and I’ll be meeting with you today.”

“Where’s Miss Caroline?” Abigail questions nervously as her eyes dart to the exit.

“Miss Caroline has a project off-site today, but she explained your case to me, and I’m more than prepared to go through possible adoptive parent candidates with you. I’m also a labor and delivery nurse, so if you have any questions about your pregnancy or labor, I can talk to you about that, too.”

“Really? I’m so nervous about actually having the baby. I mean, what if the pain is too much? What if I can’t do it?”

“Let’s go back to one of the offices and we’ll visit. I’ll answer any questions you have.” I smile reassuringly at her, and she seems slightly calmer than when she first arrived. I know she must be afraid, and I hope I’ll be able to help her through this difficult time.

About five minutes after Abigail leaves, I hear laughter coming from the lobby. Celia and Adam round the corner into the community staff room, chuckling quietly to each other. Attempting to appear confident, I square my shoulders and give them my biggest smile.

“Hey. I’m Sara, one of Caroline’s newest recruits. I just started this morning.”

Celia steps forward and shakes my hand. “Hey, I’m Celia, and this is Adam. It’s so nice to meet you. We’ve both been working at the clinic for a while now. It’s great to have a new face and an extra pair of hands.”

Celia seems genuine, and I instantly like her. Adam, on the other hand, mumbles a hello and moves to the far side of the room. Just like I thought, he’s one of those unaffected guys. God forbid he takes a minute out of his insanely self-important day to make the new girl feel welcome. Screw him and his unaffected ass.

Before I can give much thought to Adam and his boorishness, I hear someone in the lobby. Looking at the time, I realize it’s probably my second appointment.

“Hi, are you Lindsey?”

“Yes, ma’am, and this is my boyfriend, Lucas. We aren’t sure if this is the right thing for us. I mean we don’t know what we want to do. We just want to get some information …” Based on her rambling, I can tell Lindsey is nervous, understandably so, but I worry she may bolt at any minute. She isn’t showing at all, so she must be in her first trimester, or very early in her second.

“Hey, that’s perfect. We don’t have to make any decisions today. The three of us will just get to know each other, and I’ll give you information about the different available options. Nothing is set in stone today, okay? We’re just going to talk. There’s no harm in that, right?”

“I guess not,” Lindsey says.

I bring Lindsey and Lucas back to one of the offices, and out of the corner of my eye I see Adam walking toward us. As the couple walks through the office door, Adam grabs my arm.

“Can I talk to you a minute?” Adam has a pleasant enough look on his face, but there’s urgency in his words that I don’t quite understand.

“Um, sure. Lindsey and Lucas, I’ll just be one minute. Have a seat, and I’ll be right with you.” After I close the office door to separate Adam and me from the couple, I turn to him with a smile. “How can I help you?”

“How about you let me meet with these clients. I’m mean it’s your first day and all …”

“Oh, well thanks, that’s really nice of you. But I can take care of it.” As the words are coming out of my mouth, I see Adam’s expression growing hard and cold, making it painfully apparent he doesn’t like my response.

“Look, Sara was it?” He pauses momentarily and continues, “Look, Sara, I’m glad you’re feeling all
gung ho
on your first day. But I have to do what’s right for that young couple in there, because they are what’s important, not your ego. I’ve been volunteering here for a very long time, and I can guarantee you I’m much more qualified to handle this meeting. Why don’t you sit in with me and observe?
That’s
what you can do to help today. Ya got me?”

The menacing look he gives me makes my insides shake … not with nerves, but with fury. Who the fuck does this guy think he is? The old me would fumble around and step aside with my head hung in shame, but that’s the old me. This asshole will
not
see me misstep.

My eyes narrow in on the cold stare of his ice blue eyes, and my hand takes up residence on my hips. “Look, Adam was it? Look, Adam, you don’t have a damn clue what you’re talking about. I’ve been heading up the adoption committee at Providence General for the past four years. That’s the primary reason Caroline asked me to work here. And, by the way, Caroline specifically asked me to take these meetings before she left this morning. Now, if
you
would like to sit in and learn a few things from
me,
then feel free to do so. Or better yet, why don’t you go make yourself useful elsewhere. I know, you could give a little sex-Ed class to some of the Northern U students. Why don’t you teach them the proper way to put on a condom? I’m sure women ask a guy like you to double bag it, so you should be more than qualified to teach that particular skill.” And with that, I promptly pivot around and open the office door, leaving a slack jawed Adam standing alone.

As I collect the paperwork for Lindsey and Lucas, I start to feel the full weight of my little tirade resting heavily on my mind.
What in the world was I thinking going off like that? Wow, what a great way to win friends and influence people on my first day.

As I walk Lindsey and Lucas to the lobby, I only give myself a minute to celebrate a great first meeting with my clients. Then I start worrying about how I’m going to swallow my pride and apologize to Adam for acting so unprofessionally. I meant what I said, but I probably should have left out the cursing and the part where I insinuated he was a skank.

I turn around and walk slowly back to the staff room like I’m walking to my execution. When I turn the corner, I see Adam sitting at the center table looking straight at me. His arms are flat on the table, and his head is resting on his hands. He’s got a sheepish look on his face, and he’s holding what appears to be a makeshift white flag. Okay, this is not what I was expecting, but it’s definitely a welcome surprise.

“I’m waving the proverbial white flag, in case you missed it. I even double bagged it at your request …”

I move closer to Adam and realize he’s waving a small stick with condoms tied to it. I throw my head back in laughter.

“Yeah, about that. I’m really sorry I insulted your man parts. That was way out of line.”

Adam stands up and walks toward me with his arms raised in protest. “No, I was the one out of line. I jumped to conclusions without having all the information, and I’m sorry. Caroline would have my ass if she saw how I spoke to you. She’s been trying to recruit you to work with our adoption clients for months. I just didn’t put two and two together, so I apologize for being a jerk.”

I’ll admit—the humble Adam is substantially hotter than the unaffected Adam. This poses a problem, because the unaffected Adam was already scorching hot to begin with. The last thing I need is to get all worked up about someone I’m going to be working with on a regular basis. Before I can respond to Adam, Celia walks up and gently places her hand on Adam’s arm. Adam looks up at her and smiles affectionately.

“Hey, I have a couple of home visits this morning, and then I’ll be back at my office for the rest of the afternoon. I’ll see you at nine tonight, right?”

Well, problem solved. I should have realized the connection between them yesterday, but now it’s crystal clear. I’m glad the distraction of steamy, humble Adam is an impossibility, but I can’t help but feel a little nagging disappointment in my chest.

“Yeah, nine o’clock. I’ll see you then, okay?”

“Okay. Bye, Sara. I’m sorry we didn’t have much time to chat today. The clinic is open until noon on Saturdays. Are you planning on working tomorrow?”

“Yeah, I think I’ll be here.”

“Great, we’ll have to make some time to chat.” Celia winks at me, then rushes off. I’m glad Celia didn’t witness my meltdown with Adam and decide to keep her distance from me. Meltdown notwithstanding, I’m hoping to make friends with my coworkers at the clinic.

“So am I forgiven?” I look over at Adam to see he is still waving his condom flag and looking at me with a puppy dog face.

“Of course. We’ll just blame it on getting off on the wrong foot. How about that?”

“Sounds perfect.” Adam smiles and extends his hand. “Friends?”

I take his hand and shake it, holding it a little longer than socially acceptable as I ponder his request. “Yeah, friends … I’m actually pretty good at the friend thing.”

Adam gives me a confused look, but I turn around to grab my bag before he can question me about my comment.

“Will you please tell Caroline I’m sorry I missed her this afternoon? I was only scheduled a half-day today, but I’ll be back in the morning.”

“Sure thing. See ya tomorrow,
friend
.” Adam smirks at me, and I can’t help the shudder that silently ripples through me. I thank my lucky stars that Adam is taken, and I don’t have to worry about crushes, butterflies, or any of that shit … I think.