Hot Six (17 page)

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Authors: Janet Evanovich

Tags: #Romance, #Plum, #Fiction, #General, #Bail bond agents, #Mystery Fiction, #Women detectives, #Bounty hunters, #Trenton (N.J.), #Women Sleuths, #Mystery & Detective, #Stephanie (Fictitious character)

Hot Six

Page: 102

CRASH.

I changed gears and moved forward a few feet. I got out and surveyed the damage. The SUV bumper was Crumple City and Joyce was fighting with the deployed airbag. The back of the Buick was perfect. Not a scratch. I returned to the Buick and drove away. It's not a good idea to mess with a woman who has a pimple.

IT WAS OVERCAST in Deal, with a mist coming off the ocean. Gray sky, gray ocean, gray sidewalks, big pink house belonging to Alexander Ramos. I rolled past the house, made a U-turn, passed the house a second time, turned, and parked at the corner. I wondered if Ranger was watching. My guess was yes. No vans or trucks were parked on the street. That meant he'd have to be in a house. And the house would have to be unoccupied. Easy to tell the unoccupied beachfront houses. Much more difficult to tell the unoccupied houses on the road. None of those were shuttered.

I checked my watch. Same time, same place. No Ramos. After ten minutes my phone rang.

"Yo, " Ranger said.

"Yo, yourself "

"You're not very good at following directions. "

"You mean about not taking the cigarette smuggler job? Seemed too good to pass up. "

"You're going to be careful, right?"

"Right. "

"Our man's having problems getting out of the house. Hang in there. "

"How do you know this? Where are you?"

"Get ready. It's show time, " Ranger said. And he disconnected.

Alexander Ramos was through the gate and running across the road to my car. He wrenched the passenger door open and dove in. "Go!" he shouted. "Go!"

I took off from the curb and saw two men in suits round the gate and sprint toward us. I floored the Buick, and we roared away.

Ramos didn't look good at all. He was pale and sweating and gasping for air. "Christ, " he said, "I didn't think I was going to make it. It's a goddamn freak show in that house. Good thing I looked out the window when I did and saw your car. I was going nuts in there. "

"Do you want to go to the store?"

"No. That's the first place they'll look. I can't go to Sal's, either. "

I was getting a real bad feeling here. Like, this was one of the days Alexander didn't take his medicine.

Hot Six

Page: 103

"Why were those men chasing you?"

"No one was chasing me. "

"But I saw them. "

"You didn't see anything. "

Ten minutes later he pointed with his finger. "Over there. Stop at that bar. "

The three of us went into the bar, sat at a table, and went through the same ritual as the last time. The bartender brought a bottle of ouzo to the table without being asked. Ramos slugged two back and then lit up.

"Everyone knows you, " I said.

He looked around at the scarred booths that lined one wall and the dark mahogany bar that ran the length of the other. Behind the bar was the usual array of bottles. Behind the bottles was the standard bar mirror. One stool was occupied, at the far end of the room. The man stared down, into his drink. "I've been coming here for a few years, " Ramos said. "I come here when I need to get away from the freaks. "

"The freaks?"

"My family. I raised three worthless sons who spend money faster than I can make it. "

"You're Alexander Ramos, right? I saw your picture in Newsweek a while back. I'm sorry about Homer. I read about the fire in the paper. "

He poured out another shot. "One less freak to deal with. "

I felt the blood drain from my face. It was a chilling statement for a father to make.

He took a long pull on his cigarette, closed his eyes, and savored the moment. "They think the old man don't know what's going on. Well, they're wrong. The old man knows everything. I didn't build this business by being stupid. And I didn't build it by being nice, either, so they better watch their step. "

I glanced back at the door. "Are you sure we're safe here?"

"Any time you're with Alexander Ramos, you're safe. Nobody touches Alexander Ramos. "

Yeah, right. That's why we're hiding out in a bar in Asbury Park. This was feeling like Bizarro Land.

"I just don't like to be bothered when I smoke, " he said. "I don't want to have to look at all the leeches. "

"Why don't you get rid of them. Tell them to leave your house?"

Hot Six

Page: 104

Oh boy.

"We're done here, " he said. "I have to get back before my son runs me into the ground. "

"Hannibal?"

"Mr. Big Shot. I should never have sent him to college. " He stood and dropped a wad of money onto the table. "How about you? Did you go to college?"

"Yep. "

"What are you doing now?"

I was afraid if I told him I was a bounty hunter he'd shoot me. "A little of this and a little of that, " I said.

"Big fancy education and you're doing a little of this?"

"You sound like my mother. "

"You probably give your mother angina. "

That made me smile. He was scary crazy, but I sort of liked him. He reminded me of my uncle Punky. "Do you know who killed Homer?"

"Homer killed himself. "

"I read in the paper that they didn't find a gun, so they ruled out suicide. "

"More than one way to kill yourself. My son was stupid and greedy. "

"Uh . . . You didn't kill him, did you?"

"I was in Greece when he was shot. "

We locked eyes. We both knew that didn't answer the question. Ramos could have ordered his son's execution.

I drove him back to Deal and parked on a side street, a block from the pink house.

"Any time you want to make twenty bucks you just show up on the corner, " Ramos said.

Hot Six

Page: 105

I took off the second he left the car. I didn't want to risk the guys in the suits spotting me. Ten minutes later, my phone rang.

"Short visit, " Ranger said.

"He drinks, he smokes, he goes home. "

"Did you learn anything?"

"I think he might be crazy. "

"That's the consensus. "

Sometimes Ranger sounded like he was straight off the street, and sometimes he sounded like a stockbroker. Ricardo Carlos Manoso, Man of Mystery.

"Do you think Ramos might have killed his own son?"

"He's capable of it. "

"He said Homer was killed because he was greedy and stupid. You knew Homer. Was he greedy and stupid?"

"Homer was the weakest of the three sons. He'd always take the easy road. But sometimes the easy road got to be a problem. "

"How?"

"Homer would drop a hundred thousand gambling and then look for an easy way to get the money, like hijacking a truck or dealing some drugs. In the process he'd step on Mob toes or have a run-in with the police, and Hannibal would have to bail him out. "

Which led me to wonder what Ranger was doing with Homer Ramos the night Ramos was shot. No point in asking.

"Later, babe, " Ranger said. And he was gone.

I GOT HOME in time to walk Bob and take a shower. I spent an extra half-hour styling my hair so it was deceptively casual, as if I really didn't care enough to put in a lot of effort but I was so naturally gorgeous I looked outstanding anyway. It seemed like sacrilege to have such sexy hair and such a big ugly pimple, so I squeezed the pimple until it popped. Then what was left was a big bloody hole in my chin. Crap. I stuck a piece of toilet paper over the hole to stop the bleeding while I did my makeup. I put on black stretch pants and a red sweater with a scoop neck. I peeled the toilet paper off my chin and stood back to take a look. The bags under my eyes were considerably reduced and the hole in my chin was already starting to scab over. Not cover model material, but I'd look okay in dim light.

I heard the front door open and close, and Grandma breezed past the bathroom on her way to the bedroom.

"Boy, this driving is something, " Grandma said. "I don't know what I was thinking about, going all those years with no license. I had my lesson this afternoon, and then Melvina came over and took me to the mall and let me drive around in circles. I did real good, too. Except for when I stopped too short once, and Melvina got a sprained back. "

The doorbell rang and I opened it to find Myron Landowsky wheezing in the hall. Landowsky always reminded me of a box turtle, with his bald liver-spotted head thrust forward, his shoulders hunched, his trousers hiked up to his armpits.

Hot Six

Page: 106

"Would you like a glass of water?"

"You got any liquor?"

"No. "

"Never mind, then. " He looked around. "I'm here to see your grandmother. We're going out to dinner. "

"She's getting ready. She'll be out in a minute. "

There was a rap on the door and Morelli walked in. He looked at me. And then he looked at Myron.

"We're double-dating, " I said. "This is Grandma's friend, Myron Landowsky. "

"Would you excuse us, please?" Morelli said, pulling me into the hall.

"I gotta go sit down, anyway, " Landowsky said. "I had to walk all the way down here. "

Morelli closed the door, pinned me against the wall, and kissed me. When he was done I looked myself over to make sure I was still dressed.

"Wow, " I said.

His lips brushed against my ear. "If you don't get those old people out of your apartment I'm going to self-combust. "

I knew just how he felt. I'd self-combusted in the shower that morning, but it didn't help much.

Grandma opened the door and stuck her head out. "For a minute there I thought you left without us. "

WE TOOK THE Buick because we couldn't all fit in Morelli's truck. Morelli drove, Bob sat next to him, and I sat by the window. Grandma and Myron sat in the back, discussing antacids.

"Any news on the Ramos murder?" I asked Morelli.

"Nothing new. Barnes is still convinced it's Ranger. "

"No other suspects?"

"Enough suspects to fill Shea Stadium. No evidence against any of them. "

Hot Six

Page: 107

Morelli cut his eyes at me. "What about them?"

"Are they suspects?"

"Along with everyone else in three countries. "

My mother was standing at the door when we parked. It seemed strange to see her standing alone. For the past couple years Grandma had always stood beside her. The mother and daughter whose roles had reversed-Grandma gladly relinquishing parental responsibility, my mother grimly accepting the task, struggling to find a place for an old woman who'd suddenly become a strange hybrid of tolerant mother and rebellious daughter. My father, in the living room, not wanting any part of it.

"Isn't that something, " Grandma said. "It looks different from this side of the door. "

Bob bolted out of the car and charged my mother, driven by the scent of pork roast wafting from the kitchen.

Myron moved slower. "That's some car you've got, " he said. "It's a real beaut. They don't make cars like that anymore. Everything's a piece of junk today. Plastic crap. Made by a bunch of foreigners. "

My father drifted into the foyer. This was his kind of talk. My father was a second-generation American, and he loved bashing foreigners, relatives excluded. He dropped back a step when he saw Turtle Man was doing the talking.

"This here's Myron, " Grandma said by way of introduction. "He's my date tonight. "

"Nice house you got here, " Myron said. "You can't beat aluminum siding. That's aluminum siding on it, right?"

Bob was running through the house like a crazy dog, high on food smells. He stopped in the foyer and gave my father's butt a good sniffing.

"Get this dog outta here, " my father said. "Where'd this dog come from?"

"This here's Bob, " my grandmother said. "He's just saying hello. I saw a show on the television about dogs and they said sniffing butts was like shaking hands. I know all about dogs now. And we're real lucky that they whacked off Bob's doodles before he got too old and got into the habit of humping your leg. They said it's real hard to break a dog of that habit. "

"I had a rabbit once when I was a kid that was a leg humper, " Myron said. "Boy, once he got a hold of you it was the devil to get him off. And that rabbit didn't care who he went to town on. Got the cat in a stranglehold one time and almost killed it. "

I could feel Morelli shaking with silent laughter behind me.

"I'm starved, " Grandma said. "Let's eat. "

We all took our places at the table, except for Bob, who was eating in the kitchen. My father helped himself to a couple slabs of pork and passed the rest to Morelli. We started the mashed potatoes going around. And the green beans, applesauce, pickle jar, basket of dinner rolls, and pickled beets.

"No pickled beets for me, " Myron said. "They give me the runs. I don't know what it is, you get old and everything gives you the runs. "

Something to look forward to.

Hot Six

Page: 108

My mother and father both looked up from their plates.

"You bought a car?" my mother asked. "Nobody told me. "

"It's a pip, too, " Grandma said. "It's a red Corvette. "

My mother made the sign of the cross. "Dear God, " she said.

"HOW COULD YOU afford a Corvette?" my father asked. "All you get is Social Security. "

"I have money from when I sold the house, " Grandma said. "And anyway, I made a good deal. Even the Mooner said I got a good deal. "

My mother made another cross. "The Mooner, " she said with just a touch of hysteria. "You bought a car from the Mooner?"

"Not from the Mooner, " Grandma said. "The Mooner don't sell cars. I bought my car from the Dealer. "

"Thank goodness, " my mother said, hand to her heart. "For a minute there . . . Well, I'm just glad you went to a car dealer. "

"Not a car dealer, " Grandma told her. "I bought my car from the Metamucil dealer. I paid four hundred and fifty bucks for it. That's good, right?"

"Depends, " my father said. "Does it have a motor?"

"I didn't look, " Grandma said. "Don't all cars have motors?"

Joe looked pained. He didn't want to be the one to rat on my grandmother for possession of stolen property.

"While Louise and I were looking at the cars, there were a couple men in the Dealer's backyard, and they were going on about Homer Ramos, " Grandma said. "They said he was a big car distributor. I didn't know the Ramos family sold cars. I thought they just sold guns. "

"Homer Ramos sold stolen cars, " my father said, head bent over his plate. "Everybody knows that. "

I turned to Joe. "Is that true?"

Joe shrugged. Noncommittal. Cop face in place. If you knew how to read the signs, this one said "Ongoing Investigation. "

"And that's not all, " Grandma said. "He cheated on his wife. He was a real skunk. They said his brother is just as bad. He lives out in California, but he keeps a house here so he can see women on the sly. The whole family is rotten, if you ask me. "

"He must be pretty rich if he has two houses, " Myron said. "I should be so rich. I'd keep a girlfriend, too. "

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