Hyde, an Urban Fantasy (27 page)

She glanced away, and her gaze fell onto the table where he’d put the vial and where Jolie had placed a syringe last night. Her grin disappeared. “I’m not using that.”

“Then you need to stay here. Or, if that is . . . undesirable to you, at least make sure Carter knows what’s at stake and stops taking whatever he’s on that makes him unable to wake up when you change. Or he’ll be the only one who ever sleeps again.”

“Oh my God, Carter!” She jumped up. “He must be freaking out right now. I promised I’d come home.”

Mitch‘s lips tightened. “Poor guy. He must have had a horrible evening.”

She glared at him. “Leave him alone. None of this is his fault. He’s been nothing but good to me.”

“There’s that word again—good. He’s good. You’re good. Aren’t we all just . . . good.”

“Not all of us.”

He smirked. “Touché. Well, you’d better hurry home and tell all the good-fucking-news to your good-fucking-man. Oops, make that your good-
not
-fucking man,” he said, sneering.

“You’ve got the jerk-thing down pat, you know that?”

“Thank you. You might try it yourself—it would make you a little more interesting.”

“Wow. Thanks for all the support and kindness you’ve shown me. But I think I’ve had quite enough of it.”

“Then my work here is done.” He bowed deeply. “You do know the way out, don’t you?” The understanding was gone from his eyes, the kindness. He was a shell. A full-time bastard again. Dumping a bit of his anger out to keep Hyde from appearing. Eden accepted it, not wanting to experience Hyde’s wrath ever again.

“What is the Clinic, Mitch?”

He blinked. “What did you say?”

“The Clinic. What is it?”

“I have no idea. Where did you hear that?”

“Hyde mentioned it. Right before he told me how attractive I was, and how he’d like to see if I was just as attractive without my skin.”

Mitch shivered and then his shoulders slumped. “I’m sorry, Eden. I’m sorry I even showed him to you.” When he met her gaze, his face was tight, controlled. He was so adept at putting distance between them. “It won’t happen again.”

“All of us hate to be caged, Mitch. For Hyde, and maybe Chastity, it’s necessary. But for the rest of us, it’s a choice.” Eden stalked out, wondering which choice she was making.

Eden ran over the front lawn, but what she saw waiting just outside of Mitch’s property made her slam on the brakes and skid to a stop. Carter was sitting in his car, tapping his hand on the steering wheel, glaring at her.

She walked sheepishly to the passenger side and slid in. “I’m sorry.”

“Yeah.”

“Have you been here a while?”

“Yeah.”

“I’m sorry.”

“You said that already.”

“And I meant it. Both times. I should’ve at least called, I was just . . .”

His hand hit the steering wheel. “You were just
what
, Eden? Too busy? Too exhausted? Too naked? What?”

She’d pushed herself closer to the door with every accusation. The first two were true, but the last? It hurt just to think he’d believe that of her. Though she knew full-well that only a few days ago, she and Mitch hadn’t been far from what Carter was insinuating. If he hadn’t stopped. If her eyes hadn’t— “I’m sorry.”

“Stop saying that!”

“I wasn’t— We didn’t
do
anything, Carter. I swear.”

“So what the hell did you do all night? Play cards? Do each other’s toenails? Cuz, let me tell you, babe, I have a really hard time believing that dear, ole Mitch likes making s’mores.”

She wished she’d taken a moment before darting off to think about which parts of the night she could tell him. Not that she’d imagined him staking out the house, of course. But Mitch hadn’t told Jolie about Chastity, and she was thankful. So was it fair for her to tell Carter about Hyde? Was that her ‘tale to tell’?

“I talked to Jolie for a while. She was there all night, too.” She swallowed, hoping he wouldn’t ask her a question she’d have to lie to him about, knowing he would.

He stared at the steering wheel. “Did she give you some answers?”

“Yes, some.” She knew he wanted more from her, but dreaded going too far.

“Some. But not enough.” He shook his head and traced the Jeep emblem with a shaking finger. “Did you talk to Mitch too?”

“This morning, yes. But Mitch wasn’t there last night. He left a few hours after you did and came back early this morning.” Technically, that was true—Mitch had stepped out of his mind for the evening and left his body for Hyde to inhabit. But technicalities weren’t what Carter deserved. “Can we go home now? I’m tired.”

He didn’t turn on the car. “Why am I forced to drag this out of you? What aren’t you telling me?”

“Nothing.” The word stuck in her throat. The first outright lie she’d ever told him. “We talked about Chastity. What she’s like, when she appears. There’s a rough pattern, you know, every four days.”

He studied her face, his eyes darting to her eyes, then her lips, then her body. “That’s all that happened? All night?”

“Yes. That’s it.” The lie felt like a dry-swallowed pill, a rock she struggled to swallow, slowly moving down her throat. And even though she could keep it down, she couldn’t stomach it. “Really.” She wished he’d stop looking at her like that, as if he could see the lies pouring out of her mouth.

He started the engine. “So what now?”

Eden forced herself to smile.
Move on. Pretend everything is okay.
“We go home, I take a nap, you make me breakfast, and then we mark every fourth day on the calendar.”

“Not until you take that damned dress off and burn it.”

She looked down at the dress Mitch had bought her. She’d completely forgotten about it. Just like she’d forgotten about Carter, her promise to return home last night, and, oh yeah, telling the truth. Well, she hadn’t actually forgotten about that, had she? More like she’d considered it and then deliberately did something she knew was wrong.

Why was she lying for a self-proclaimed-and-proud-of-it bastard, while hurting the man who sat beside her, who had stood beside her for so many years? To protect him? From what? The answer stung even more than the lie had.

Me
.

She was protecting Carter from herself.

The drive home felt as long as the Mississippi River. As they pulled up in front of their apartment building, she touched his wrist, drawing a figure eight on it.

“Carter?”

He flicked his arm away from her, flipped the gear shift and looked at her.

“I think you need to move on.” She ignored his confused expression and continued, “I adore you, but I think it would be best for us to live apart from now on.”

“Is this about him?” There was fire in his voice.

“No. It’s not about him. At all. This is about you. You don’t deserve this. To live like this.”

“And
you
do?”

“No, I—I don’t think I do either, but you can walk away. I can’t. You can have a normal life.”

His eyes shined. “Why would you ever think that I could walk away?”

She might have been out of tears. Or maybe she was just too lost, too overwhelmed, but she had no reactions left in her to give.

He twisted in his seat and took her hand. “If you want to live apart because of any other reason, then that’s . . . fine. But, until this thing with Chastity stops happening, I’ll be spending my nights with you, so deal with it.”

Deal with it. Something she hadn’t really even tried yet. Relying on Carter and then Mitch to help her through. She took a deep breath. Wasn’t it time to start living her own life instead of having other people live it for her?

She pretended to nap for most of the day, not wanting to talk to him—to lie to him—anymore. He checked on her often, standing in the doorway to her room, not speaking, not coming any closer. She hoped and feared that he was formulating a plan for his life without her.

When she finally got out of bed, she didn’t look for the dress. The plastic garbage can had been emptied, a brand new liner in it. He’d stood right next to her when she’d thrown it into the trash.

Their conversations were stilted and awkward all afternoon. “Are you hungry?” “Not really,” said by each of them to the other numerous times. That was pretty much it. Carter sat on the couch and punched the arrows on the remote incessantly.

Eden stared at the calendar posted on the fridge. His study group and workout schedule, the days he would go to the police station to intern, a dentist appointment next week, the day she needed to register for next fall’s classes. All normal things. Her fingers gripped the dry erase marker.

Every four days.
Great
. How does one mark ‘doom’ on their schedule? A circle? A smiley face? She made a large ‘X’ through every fourth day. Her mouth dry, she counted 1-2-3-Chastity, 1-2-3-Chastity. . . .

From directly behind her, Carter’s voice sent a spasm down her back. “You sure about this every four days thing?”

“Pretty sure.”

His fingers tapped her shoulder, as if the body they belonged to wasn’t sure they were allowed to touch. Or were afraid to. “Until we’re sure, I’ll stay here.”

“Okay.” Oh God, he was really going to leave her. She knew it was for the best. For
his
best. And it was bound to happen one day. She’d never be able to offer him what he needed, especially now.

He wandered back into the living room and flopped down onto the couch again, the light of the room changing as he flipped through the channels. It was getting dark outside.

Night was coming. If Mitch was right about the pattern, tonight she could sleep. And tomorrow? Well, tomorrow was a completely different story.

§          §          §

It was like waiting for the guillotine to fall. Knowing that tonight, as soon as she fell asleep, she would be somewhere else, and Chastity would take over her body. Eden was so tired—she’d barely slept last night, flinching every time her eyes closed all the way. And she’d only gotten a minimal amount of sleep for days before that. Tonight wouldn’t give her any rest either.
How can this go on indefinitely?
Her mind was already playing tricks with her, sleep deprivation leaving her unsure of what was real.

At ten o’clock, she started to nod off on a kitchen chair. She jerked up and went into the living room.

“Carter?”

He glanced up from the television. He looked as exhausted as she felt. She wondered how much sleep he’d gotten last night, or the night before while waiting for her to come home.

“Can you lock me into my room?”

He dragged his tall frame off the couch and followed her. She flipped the padlock on her window-bars closed and climbed into bed, her heart hammering in her chest.

“Good night,” she said.

His lips were pressed together as he started to close the door.

“Carter?”

He stopped and finally looked her in the eyes. “Yeah?”

“You mean everything to me. I love you.” The words tumbled out of her mouth, words she’d never actually said aloud. “Not in the way I know you want me to, but I love you so much. I’m so sorry, Carter.”

“Yeah.” He swallowed, his eyes filled with pain and disappointment and goodbye. “I love you too, Eden.”  He was letting that part of his love for her go, she could see it. “I’ll be right outside the door.”

She heard the padlock snap shut. She was alone.

Mitch spent the day pacing a trench into the floor. After about two hours of laps in the pool and an hour pounding on the treadmill, even exercise couldn’t distract him anymore.