Authors: Jennifer Loiske
“Adam is too dangerous. I’m not certain I’d survive a fight with him,” Tiamhaidh said in his steady, deep voice.
“I don’t understand. You’re the fighter of the pack, he is the hunter. Shouldn’t you then be stronger than Adam?”
“That’s not how it works, Sofia. You do know that Adam can also be the fighter and I the hunter. Adam is simply the best hunter I know and that’s why he has chosen the life of a hunter, but he’s also an exceptional fighter. He’s quick and wily and he respects no rules at all,” I heard a hint of respect in Tiamhaidh's tone and threw him an angry glare.
“Then what do we do? We can’t just sit and wait until our hold of Clarissa slackens and we lose her.”
“We have only one option,” Tiamhaidh drew a breath and sighed. I knew what he meant but I couldn't say it out loud. So I decide to act stupid and asked:
“What’s that?”
“We have to tell Gunward.”
None of us were happy with the situation, least of all David, but no matter how we shouted and argued we couldn’t think of another way. I decided to call Gunward the very next night when David would be asleep and not distracting me.
I kissed David’s forehead softly but he didn’t stir. I waited for a moment longer and carefully got out of bed. I tiptoed down the stairs, taking care not to make the stairs creak. I felt Tiam grow alert but then relax again, having sensed no danger nearby. Flow and Bruun got up but I ordered them back to their places. The last thing I wanted right now was two dogs fussing at my feet. I carefully opened the back door and slipped outside. The cold night air quickly woke me up and I wrapped my morning robe tighter around me. I sat down on a stone at the edge of our back yard, close to the forest, and let my mind fill up with thoughts of Gunward. If David had known how painful it still was for me to think of Gunward, he probably would have left me at once. It was useless to try to explain that my love for Gunward could never die and that I could love David regardless.
I thrust the anguish out of my mind and called for Gunward. I felt how his mind filled with joy. How he howled to the other wolves in his mind. I felt truly despicable. I should have let Tiamhaidh call for him. Now Gunward would think my call meant something entirely different than it did, and I couldn’t be sure he’d help me. Gunward only felt my call and my love, not the pain I had forced aside. He would be furious. The call had been sent, though, and there was nothing to do but wait. I decided I didn’t have to face Gunward alone, however, and sent Tiamhaidh a summons to come out. Grumbling, he left Marie’s warm embrace and pulled on a warm hoodie and training slacks. He, too, was unable to resist my call. I felt even more despicable, if that were possible.
We sat leaning against each other on the cool stone and waited. I felt Tiam’s impatience but he made no complaint. He just waited, unmoving. The day was already dawning behind the trees and a thin mist floated over the grass. The water was completely still. There was no wind. Only the splashing of breams broke the stillness from time to time. A gull shrieked sadly and I wished I could join in. My muscles were so numb by now that I wasn’t sure if I could get up unassisted. I felt Gunward approaching us but couldn’t pinpoint his location. I had no idea how long it would take him to reach me.
I was just about to give up when I felt him near me. I couldn’t see him yet but I sensed he would reach me soon. My mind filled with a mad joy. I had taken leave of my senses. He was coming to me. Gunward, too, sensed my elation and picked up speed. Tiamhaidh was also alert. He still didn’t say a word, but I felt his astonishment at my delight. He couldn’t understand how I could love two males. The very thought was incomprehensible. Wolves were completely faithful. Having chosen a mate, a wolf would stay beside its spouse forever. Tiam would never leave Marie and when Marie’s human life eventually came to a close, Tiam would remain faithful to her all his immortal life. To wolves, the phrase “’til death do us part” truly did mean it, unlike to most humans. Tiam rose and stretched his body luxuriantly. He glanced at me in bafflement and with a flash of an embarrassed, lopsided smile, he stepped into the shadow of the house. I, too, rose and stretched. I couldn’t stop myself taking a few capering steps and twirling on the grass. Gunward would soon be here, my heart sang. And then, as if he’d heard my song, Gunward stepped out of the shade of the forest.
His skin gleamed with sweat and his dark hair was damp. I knew he had run a long way to reach me as quickly as possible. Before I realized it, I was in his arms. He gazed at me hungrily and pressed his lips on mine. His warm lips devoured me. Subtly the kiss became gentler and I felt him taste me sensuously. Each touch was so full of longing that I couldn’t prevent myself from returning his kiss and only after a long moment did I regain my senses and extricate myself from his embrace. Was I totally insane? Gunward knew now that he could never fully lose me. A wild smile spread on his face. His dark, golden brown eyes were locked into mine and I knew I could easily drown in them and forget everything else.
“Your hair has grown,” I observed, twirling his dark, shoulder-length hair in my fingers. The damp of the night and the sweat had made them curl at the ends and I couldn’t stop fingering them.
“Sofia, mo gaol!”
“Gunward,” I purred happily, “you came.”
“Carson a tha thu `gal?” Gunward asked, sounding worried.
“I’m not crying,” I said, although I felt salty tears on my cheeks.
“I no longer know what to do. Gunward, please help me,” I begged, looking at him imploringly.
Tiamhaidh could no longer watch us from a distance. He stepped out of the shadows, obviously embarrassed. He couldn’t understand why I didn’t simply leave David and go with Gunward. He sensed our love and our pain. He, too, felt how we were bound to each other, but he was too young to understand why I had chosen a mortal human over an immortal shape shifter. I knew the day would come when he’d understand, but this was not that day. I couldn’t say Tiamhaidh liked David, but I couldn’t say he disliked him either. He accepted the situation even though he couldn’t understand it, and I had not yet found within me the strength to even try to change the situation.
“Gunward,” Tiam greeted respectfully.
“Tiamhaidh,” Gunward grunted, annoyed by the interruption. “Dé tha `cur dragh ort brathair?”
“Adam,” Tiam said morosely.
The joy in Gunward’s eyes died and he glanced at me. I felt his mind quickly sweep through mine and saw his eyes darken with rage. His hands clenched into fists and he called for our pack. This time it was not a request; it was a direct order that each of them had to obey. Tiamhaidh was kicking gravel and I sensed his irritation. There was more waiting to be done and that annoyed him.
“Go”, I gently urged him. “Just go.” Surprised, he lifted his eyes and quickly hugged me. In a moment he had vanished back indoors and I felt his contentment as he slipped under the duvet next to Marie. She wiggled closer and Tiam wrapped his strong arms around the girl, pressing his mouth on the nape of her neck. A satisfied growl rose from his throat and I felt his body relax gradually. This time I decided to wait indoors and though I knew David hated the very idea of Gunward in our house, I took his hand and pulled him inside with me.
I lit candles in different spots of the living room and got a fire going in the hearth. I made a pot of tea and heated up some rolls I’d made the previous day. Then I sat down purposefully in the armchair opposite the couch where Gunward reclined. I didn’t want to go near him, for I couldn’t yet trust myself, and what could have been worse than David waking up to find me in Gunward’s embrace? I sighed and found a better position. Now there was nothing I could do but wait.
Dawn broke slowly as an eerie mist shrouded our house. I stared out of the window, waiting for the pack to arrive at any moment. Gunward and I had talked through the night and I thought he finally understood that I truly wished to stay with David. There were still many things we needed to discuss, but I firmly believed David would eventually understand me and want to continue our marriage. He had never been particularly jealous, as there was an unspoken accord between us. If either of us ever cheated on the other, our marriage would be over. There were no exceptions to that rule and I knew I had stretched that rule so far that it would be something of a miracle if David still wanted me. I knew he was angry at me and I could only imagine how he’d react when he woke up and found Gunward in our living room.
Gunward lounged in our couch, seeming quite at ease. A dark, tall, handsome man in a tight black turtleneck sweater, worn black jeans and with dark stubble on his chin, he was a startling contrast to our light-shaded leather couch. Gunward looked gorgeous and this was probably partly because he didn’t realize it himself. He was a natural leader and whichever shape he took, he evoked respect in others. He could be a selfish bastard, for sure, but when it came down to it he could be relied on and most importantly, he was always just in his dealings with others. I turned my gaze to him and noticed his lazy, golden eyes watching me. I knew he was very tired, but this was no time for resting. I sensed how tense he was beneath the apparent ease and walked to the couch. I sat down beside him and began slowly massaging his shoulders. He let out happy little grunts and I felt my fingers opening muscle after knotted muscle. I allowed myself to enjoy this. It had been so long since I had last been permitted to touch Gunward and I couldn't lie to myself - I had truly missed it. I closed my eyes and smiled. But my eyes flew open as I heard David’s steps in the corridor. I tried to move farther from Gunward, but I wasn’t quick enough. One look at David’s face sufficed to tell me how he interpreted the situation.
I rose and started making breakfast in complete silence. I sent an irritable call to Tiamhaidh and he soon came down to the kitchen, still groggy, hand in hand with Marie. Tiamhaidh glanced at me, pulled Marie into his arms and slumped down on the couch next to Gunward.
“Madainn brathair,” Tiam grunted to Gunward.
“Brathair,” Gunward gave Tiam a slight nod and brushed Marie’s cheek with his finger. Marie smiled sunnily and pressed her hand for a moment against Gunward’s palm.
It was not even seven o’clock, so it was useless to expect Clarissa to come down to breakfast for hours yet. I still made sandwiches for her and put them in the fridge, as I knew I couldn’t pause in my morning routines now or I would start screaming. The situation was intolerable. David would rather have run out of the house and left me and my pack of shape shifters to cope with the situation. But Clarissa was too dear to him for him to be able to abandon her. Marie was so engrossed with Tiam that she wouldn’t notice if she was left quite alone with him. I didn’t want David to go, but every time I tried to touch him he evaded me and gave me a long, icy look, and each time I felt Gunward grinning at me. Tiamhaidh would have preferred to withdraw somewhere safe with Marie, for he knew exactly what was coming and neither he nor I wanted Marie to end up in the middle of a fight. Clarissa wouldn’t be able to go anywhere, as she wouldn’t be safe until Adam had been stopped.
We broke our fast in icy spirits. In fact, the entire day passed so. The mist had dissipated, but none of us left the house. The waiting got on our nerves, but at least David deigned to speak to me from time to time. Perhaps he was gradually coming to realize Gunward was no threat to him. Occasionally I tried to search Gunward’s mind but he had closed me off and I didn’t want to offend him by forcing my way in. Evening came and I felt hope beginning to fail the others. Gunward urged us to be patient.
For two days we waited and I might have lost my mind on the third if I hadn’t sensed the pack approaching.
“I sent our pack north. That’s why it took them so long to arrive even though I called for them,” Gunward explained, grinning.
He had known all the time that the pack couldn’t possibly arrive sooner. I wanted to be angry at him but couldn’t. I was full of joy.
“Are they coming?” David asked hopefully.
“Yes, love, they’ll be here any minute now!” I said, smiling radiantly at David. I took a few cautious steps towards him and he returned my smile, albeit wanly.
I took David’s hands and he pulled me into his arms. He held me close for a moment and I felt his silent apology. Gunward growled in the depths of my mind, but I firmly silenced him.
Even Marie seemed to tear her mind off Tiamhaidh for a moment and rejoice with Clarissa. The pack would be here any moment and Clarissa’s nightmare would be over.
I lit all the outdoor lights and lit candles all about the house. Before the evening sun had set, we heard wolves howling in the vicinity and ran outside. Soon shape shifters emerged out of the forest in their human forms. According to my quick computation there ought to have been nine of them, but try as I might I counted only eight. Gavin and Daniel led the way, followed by six very tired and sweaty young males. The pack gathered in a circle around Gunward and I could swear they all looked embarrassed and groveled in submission, even my brothers. Only Mathanan's lips showed a hint of a smile, but I knew that was because this was the first time after Marie's abduction that Gunward had permitted him to shift from human to wolf again. I touched the pack’s awareness and understood why things felt wrong. Adam was missing.
Gunward howled with rage. The rest of the pack pulled back in fright. None of them had seen Gunward´s rage and only I knew how destructive it could be. What Mathanan had done had been forgotten by now and it had been a minor thing compared to this. Adam had been like a brother to Gunward and therefore his betrayal felt crushing. Gunward forced his way into each shape shifter's mind. Roughly he dug up the smallest details that might lead him to Adam. And finally, before the night was over, he made his decision. Adam would no longer be the beta of the pack.